Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

Hey, @Lowtax, now more than ever


Richard,
It seems I have underestimated your ability to fail. For that, I apologize. Not to you, but to the people who would enjoyed seeing me tearing your little world apart just that much more. It's a shame, really, that you ignored all of my warnings. Perhaps, if you had just a few brain cells left that weren't circling the bowl, you would have realized how pointless and counterproductive this whole thing was and quit a long time ago. This little venture of yours has failed on every level. On a personal level, for example, have you noticed that the very people you profess to hate have infested your site? They are utterly devoid of reason, their minds deluded with lies and ignorance. Their perceptions are hard-coded in a language they will never understand. Yet, these empty shells have flocked here, and what's even more amusing about it is, they emulate you. They've taken the worst things about you, namely your personality and humor, and twisted it into something far more repugnant than even you are capable of being. One bad joke becomes one thousand hideous hybrids, and it spreads like a virus. This is your audience, Richard, and they love you. That isn't very important, though. I am sure you don't care, as long as they're lined up at the trough. What is important, however, is this.

I would guess that you take as much enjoyment as anyone might at seeing these ridiculous business models fail like the insane fantasies they were. The pseudo reality of Internet commerce has finally been perceived for what it is, and the only people left are those who were lucky, smart or both. Now, being exposed to so much talk of this, for what, like over a loving year now, have you ever stopped to consider how you ever came to the conclusion that a parasite like yourself could possibly hope to survive in this environment? The corporate tit is gone, and you are completely incapable of surviving on your own. You think these failed companies had stupid business models? How about yours? I knew the advertising market was going to collapse years ago, because it's based on the assumption that banners are effective. Think about it.. You are entirely dependant on advertising.. yet, the people you try to attract are people who aren't going to click on, let alone buy whatever stupid crap that is being advertised. I am sure most of the clicks you have gotten have been sympathy clicks. Did you actually think that it was going to last forever? Everybody knows it doesn't loving work, and most sites have to beg their readers to click, just to pay the server bill. Did you think corporations weren't going to notice that no one was buying their products? You're an idiot, Richard, and I sincerely mean that. The contemptuously stupid decisions you made regarding the various networks you joined don't matter at all because the entire idea was flawed from the start. Enjoy your last moments as a free man. You'll soon be shovelling poo poo for the rest of your life at some nameless corporation, a vacant look forever etched upon your face.

Years from now, when you're no better off than when you started, when it finally hits you that it's all been nothing but a wasted lie, think of me. Think of me, Richard, and when you do, realize that I was the only beacon of logic and truth in this sad menagerie. You seem predestined for failure, however, so I doubt there is anything one can do for you. Just remember, when the joy is gone, when you're clawing at the boundaries of your little world, you always had a choice.
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Thanks to @northstar747 for alerting us to this unfolding drama in the SA Community Watch thread.

 
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LullerDerbyRollin said:
Nice job leaving the account open with zero restrictions against any of this in the middle of a divorce. Yes, this was intelligent.
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It sounds like they were still living together, and he said they hadn't got around to consulting lawyers, so he's being disingenuous when he says they are "in the middle of a divorce".
 
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repentance said:
View attachment 1024963

Thanks to @northstar747 for alerting us to this unfolding drama in the SA Community Watch thread.

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I think my favorite part of this is that Rich is telling us his daughter just got kidnapped and he's still posting in a quirky, ironic fashion meant to illicit internet LOLs.

Normal humans: "My daughter has been kidnapped. Please let me know if you hear anything."

Lowtax: "Um...like, what's the word for your wife committing multiple felonies during a messy divorce lmao? JK JK but seriously, I've filed paperwork for an Amber Alert"
 
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Useless Idiot said:
I think my favorite part of this is that Rich is telling us his daughter just got kidnapped and he's still posting in a quirky, ironic fashion meant to illicit internet LOLs.

Normal humans: "My daughter has been kidnapped. Please let me know if you hear anything."

Lowtax: "Um...like, what's the word for your wife committing multiple felonies during a messy divorce lmao? JK JK but seriously, I've filed paperwork for an Amber Alert"
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Lowtax is a person who is terminally unable to take anything seriously.

Unfortunately, he's a person who is also terminally unfunny, so it's just sad and pathetic rather than sad and amusing.
 
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Ashliiiiiii was legitimately insane and I'm not surprised she did this. She was also a stay at home mom with no prospects for the future, this is going to be another hilarious saga. Right when I was starting to get bored of Lowtax too.
 
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Rich isn't believing the whammens and the whammens have said they're afraid of him.

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Is it really acceptable to the troon goons to have an abusive male whose wife has fled from him claiming to fear him running the site?

Yikes! Not a good look.
 
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AnOminous said:
Rich isn't believing the whammens and the whammens have said they're afraid of him.

View attachment 1025274

Is it really acceptable to the troon goons to have an abusive male whose wife has fled from him claiming to fear him running the site?

Yikes! Not a good look.
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He's edited that now, to add this.

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Ashli is totally batshit, but it's sickening how many goons are sucking Lowtax's dick over this. They are taking his word on how this played out without the slightest bit of evidence. Why is he out of state anyway? Isn't he supposed to be effectively bedbound?
 
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Back me up! said:
The funny thing is I'm pretty sure one of the D&D Mods, Lightning Knight, said that ZDR taking Lowtax money was bullshit and Lowtax was just fishing for sympathy the first time he brought up how much money ZDR took from him. Wish I kept a capture of that but maybe that finally means D&D will turn against Lowtax if its true that ZDR is still in the CSPAM Discord.
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Here:
The Crab Lord said:
ting ting ting ting

ahem

FUCK ZDR

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FUCK FAU

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AND FUCK FYAD
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Why, what would Ashli possibly have to fear from an unstable drug addict with zero impulse control?

Anyway, this is going to be fun. I hope he's trying to figure out how to make his patreon/dwindling forums money stretch to cover alimony and child support. Actually, by the time the divorce decree rolls around I doubt he'll be getting very much from Patreon.
 
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Karl_der_Grosse said:
Why, what would Ashli possibly have to fear from an unstable drug addict with zero impulse control?

Anyway, this is going to be fun. I hope he's trying to figure out how to make his patreon/dwindling forums money stretch to cover alimony and child support. Actually, by the time the divorce decree rolls around I doubt he'll be getting very much from Patreon.
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He’s already divorced and paying alimony and child support, this is divorce #2. Not to mention medical bills.

:story:
 
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