Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[Dom Cruise]

Because their marketing director is a 20 something year old bugman who thinks Instagram is the place to advertise and market. They also seem to think the soy demographic will outnumber the family demographic in profitability, probably because their Bugmen marketers are stupid and selfish fucks.

Well, I know I'm stating the obvious here but if this culture could fuck up as surefire a thing as a Star Wars theme park then damn.

 

[Jaimas]

Well guys... are you ready for the next trilogy covering Disney's take on the Yuuzhan Vong's war.

It's why I'm happy I stopped giving a damn.

We all knew the limb was gangrenous, best to sever it now before the infection reaches the nerves.

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

Storywise people didn't feel it was epic enough despite wrapping up the 8 other games and not tripping over itself.

The Biggest problem is that the Disney Worlds are Filler that are put in..not to advance the plot but because "it is kingdom hearts we have to have disney worlds"

 

[RomanesEuntDomus]

Pulling the Enperor out of a hat just from a narrative standpoint is an issue since they were planning a sequential trilogy. Which means each movie is the beginning, the middle and the end.

Compare to the original trilogy. The bad guy Darth Vader is introduced and he kills a whole bunch of people. We later learn he is part of something called "the Empire". Since he was subordinate to Tarkin in the film its shown Vader is not ultimately in charge. The heroes spend most of the movie running from Vader, including the final sequence where he is shooting down fighters left and right.

In the second movie Vader has overall field command, but now we are introduced to the true big bad. The Emperor. Luke ends the movie getting his shit wrecked by Vader. Then in the third movie the Emperor shows up in the flesh at last and we have the final throne room showdown.

At no point in the original trilogy is the Empire played for laughs. They were an ominous, competent force that the Rebels manage to beat by the skin of their teeth in the first movie and wrecks their shit in the second. Which makes the battle of Endor a satisfying payoff. You dont see The Emperor losing his temper and yelling, you dont see Vader getting thrown around a bridge.

Compare that to Disney star wars. They introduce their big bad right off the bat, have the lead charachter effortlessly defeat him, while in the process the first order is shown as bumbling incompetent morons with the emotional range of 4 year old boys. All in the first movie. Then in the second movie they...do the same thing, only this time kill the final boss like a bitch and then fight a pointless ground battle.

So now their narrative is completely borked. They need to build to the climax but they've already blown their load. Twice! Worse we STILL dont know what the first order is, how they "reign" or why we should root for the heroes to beat then. Telling people to "read the books" is pointless. If your movie is only explainable if people have a written compendium then it's a bad story. Tolkien had an entire bible's worth of back story and lore for Lord of the Rings but you dont need to read any of it to be able to understand and get invested in that story. Both the books and the films.

What they have is Kylo Ren, who Rey has bested TWICE now, his scooby doo gang called the first order, and a ridiculously over powered protagonist who "came from nothing". What do you do with that? You cant just use deus ex machina and wave it all away and say "it was the emperor all along!" In the original trilogy there was a progression towards the face off with Palpatine. Where is the progression here? There is none.

Main issue is that there are no stakes, so to speak. There are things "at stake" (ie: peace of the galaxy, the good guys prevailing and defeating the baddies), but since the ST has channeled Sonichu's writing to a point of absurdity, Rey always has the correct power (to a ridiculous degree) that she needs to handily solve any pickle she finds herself in.
The power and capabilities of every character and organization shift massively with whatever the plot demands at the moment, so you never have a feeling that anything is really "at stake", the suspension of disbelief is utterly broken. You know Rey will win and you don't even humor the thought that she could just be slightly inconvenienced. When Snoke bonked her on the head with Anakin's lightsabre, that was literally the worst thing that has happened to her throughout the entire fucking ST this far.

So of course we don't feel any kind of tension. When someone loses, we know this only serves the plot. When someone has to overcome something, we know they will. If someone is caught in an escapeless situation, we know something will save them.
We know that for most protagonists of most shows and movies, but we still experience tension. In nuWars, the movies just lamely go through the motions and it mystifies me, why so many people don't see through this.
Oh no. Rey has been caught. Oh well, she escaped thanks to her newly found powers of [whatever the fuck it was that she needed to escape].
Top notch writing.

I mean....nobody thought disney would be that fucking stupid to just have him be some random irrelevent fucking nobody who had zero importance to anyone despite wiping out the jedi and corrupting the skywalkers again

Best part (or worst part, depending on your perspective) is that Ruin put a lot of effort into insulting fans for actually being invested in any of this shit.
It's not often we see a producer mock people for caring about their franchise. Then again, that behaviour has been on the rise...

This is Jack Scalfani tier of laziness and incompetence

Dude. If you gave me a choice of either eating something made by Jack Scalfani or that GE kid's menu garbage, I would honestly have trouble picking, that's how bad it is.
I'm not gonna lie and say "It looks so shitty, I would even choose Jack Scalfani's stuff over it!", but I have to say, it would not be an easy decision and that scares me.

 

[Marissa Moira]

The Biggest problem is that the Disney Worlds are Filler that are put in..not to advance the plot but because "it is kingdom hearts we have to have disney worlds"

I would say the only world I was real disappointed with was Frozen's. Tangled's world had at least the town you could explore while Frozen just lacked so much interesting shit and was just a basic snow level with a minigame that could have probably tied into Cool Runnings far better than any other movie.

I would blame Corporate Meddling because Big Hero Six had the most leeway and acted as a quasi-sequel to the movie where as all the big deal disney properties/disney princess shit were just the movie condensed and took no real risks. Square clearly had certain limitations where it came to the big deal Disney worlds. I mean notice how much freedom the Pirates level had with the whole ship system and unique features, Disney doesn't really care about Pirates anymore since they have Marvel, so Square had more freedom with what was allowed in the level.

I honestly would have loved a Zootopia level where you ride the monorail around the different biomes.

 

[Zaryiu]

I think people like HelloGreedo are caught in a hell of their own making.
So dedicated to their narrative of how mean old Lucas had lost it and was "ruining" Star Wars forever.
And of course Disney were going to be the ones to ride in and "save" Star Wars from the old man.
Some people are very stupid if you haven't noticed.
So know they have to convince themselves that the Emperor has New Clothes and that Star War isn't being raped and whored out by the Rat worse than Lucas could ever have done.
A decade and a half of Nerd Rage can't have all been for nothing now can it?
The choices being either to admit to being wrong and that Lucas wasn't all that bad or to shill like theres no tomorrow and to pretend that this was what you wanted all along.
Consistency and honesty leading to the former and hypocrisy and ego leading to the latter.

What leads to a third opinion,, that neither should should touch it and let the series rest to reduce the damage for a few decades?

 

[Lucille Bluth]

I was reading a while back that the driving reason why Disney bought Star Wars and Marvel was because they needed franchises for boys to enjoy.

It makes sense considering how Disney Princesses have brought Disney their greatest success from Snow White starting it all to Little Mermaid kicking off the "90s Renaissance" and Tangled, Princess and the Frog and Frozen arguably helping bring Disney out of their 2000s non Pixar slump.

Which is why I found it weird that Disney/Star Wars tried "feminizing" or "targeting" more towards a female audience with "strong female protagonists" like Rey and Jyn and whatever. It didn't really matter anyways, the core demographics for the Star Wars have always been male dominated and all that "female power" didn't do jackshit.

On another note, people are making bets that The Rise of Skywalker won't beat the Lion King Remake and possibly even Frozen 2 at the worldwide box office. That seems very plausible. Much of Asia minus Japan doesn't GAF about Star Wars the way they do Marvel or Fast and Furious movies and the markets where Star Wars shines (much of Europe, North America/Australia) have likely had their fill. I mean it's still gonna make a billion plus unless something drastic happens but it's crazy to think just how much money Disney left on the table if they just managed the series better. The Rise of Skywalker could've potentially been another 2B+ film for Disney.

 

[Jaimas]

It's not often we see a producer mock people for caring about their franchise. Then again, that behaviour has been on the rise...

You used to see it much more rarely, because it was economic suicide.

But what's very interesting is despite all the autistic screeching about fan entitlement - the belief that the fans of a given series have a right to have a certain right to have things done "their way" - it is in fact the creators that are being the entitled ones with this shit. They're the ones demanding that the fans stop their rabble-rousing, stop asking questions, and just consume product.

What they're missing at the end of the day is that the fans are customers and the movie is a product. When you watch a movie at release, it's a transaction: Your money for th worth of the studio, in hopes that you derive sufficient entertainment from the movie to make it worth your time. But the fans don't owe the studio a fucking thing beyond that transaction, and if the movie looks like shit, they have every right to opt out. The studio took a calculated risk of alienating its established base, and that risk didn't pay off so well. To us, this is simple logic. To the studio, however, the fandom just becomes the all-consuming bogeyman that stands in the way of their glorious success:

"What's that? You hate blatant political and social pandering? We'll show you how wrong you are when we put both in our latest movie. Hate the fact that every movie to come out of our studio treats every IP it touches like something to be fucked to death? Hate boring, empty, pandering characters that mirror the dullness of the movie's color palette? Wrong again. This movie has that. Better than before. You hate alternating between pointless unrelated side-stories and a core plot where nothing fucking happens? Still wrong. You'll love that shit when we put it in our next movie. By combining all these elements you fucking despise, you'll see how we were secretly geniuses the whole time and you couldn't see it because you were blinded by nostalgia and fanboy rage."

Cut to six months later and you get Sunset.

 

[Muttnik]

Looking at more food. I know it was covered when the park first opened so I'm just looking at newer videos to see how the food has changed/gone down in quality since then.

Look at the gross solidity of those "ribs". It looks like brownie frosting instead of a nice brown char or gravy. The mac and mashed potatoes beneath look ambiguously like microwaved Stouffers sludge. This shit is $17 bucks.

Oh what the fuck. Junior high food.

Seven bucks for scaly turkey-flavored "jerky".

This is their new vegan Ronto Wrap or whatever the fuck it's called. Looks less like "meat" and more like "mutt", as my old man always used to say.

 

[neverendingmidi]

Looking at more food. I know it was covered when the park first opened so I'm just looking at newer videos to see how the food has changed/gone down in quality since then.

View attachment 1035365
Look at the gross solidity of those "ribs". It looks like brownie frosting instead of a nice brown char or gravy. The mac and mashed potatoes beneath look ambiguously like microwaved Stouffers sludge. This shit is $17 bucks.

View attachment 1035370

Oh what the fuck. Junior high food.

View attachment 1035379
View attachment 1035382

Seven bucks for scaly turkey-flavored "jerky".

View attachment 1035385

This is their new vegan Ronto Wrap or whatever the fuck it's called. Looks less like "meat" and more like "mutt", as my old man always used to say.

Eh, I've had good jerky that looks like that, it's just the rack pattern where it's dried. It's not done for "effect" or anything, it's just the way it's made. Usually it's a drier jerky than something you get in a bag at a gas station.

 

[Vault Boy]

So to sum up the food offered at GE, not substantial, all vegan, unappealing, and designed to rape your wallet.

Isn't it amazing just how GE manages to suck and blow at the same time?

 

[mindlessobserver]

You used to see it much more rarely, because it was economic suicide.

But what's very interesting is despite all the autistic screeching about fan entitlement - the belief that the fans of a given series have a right to have a certain right to have things done "their way" - it is in fact the creators that are being the entitled ones with this shit. They're the ones demanding that the fans stop their rabble-rousing, stop asking questions, and just consume product.

What they're missing at the end of the day is that the fans are customers and the movie is a product. When you watch a movie at release, it's a transaction: Your money for th worth of the studio, in hopes that you derive sufficient entertainment from the movie to make it worth your time. But the fans don't owe the studio a fucking thing beyond that transaction, and if the movie looks like shit, they have every right to opt out. The studio took a calculated risk of alienating its established base, and that risk didn't pay off so well. To us, this is simple logic. To the studio, however, the fandom just becomes the all-consuming bogeyman that stands in the way of their glorious success:

"What's that? You hate blatant political and social pandering? We'll show you how wrong you are when we put both in our latest movie. Hate the fact that every movie to come out of our studio treats every IP it touches like something to be fucked to death? Hate boring, empty, pandering characters that mirror the dullness of the movie's color palette? Wrong again. This movie has that. Better than before. You hate alternating between pointless unrelated side-stories and a core plot where nothing fucking happens? Still wrong. You'll love that shit when we put it in our next movie. By combining all these elements you fucking despise, you'll see how we were secretly geniuses the whole time and you couldn't see it because you were blinded by nostalgia and fanboy rage."

Cut to six months later and you get Sunset.

I think it's even more profound then that. The fans aren't customers to the studios who buy and trade these IP. They are built in too the whole thing like a heard of cattle is built into a ranch. When Disney bought Lucasfilm, they weren't just buying the rights to star wars, they were buying all those star wars pay piggies too. The idea that the pay pigs wouldnt eat the slop was not even a factor in anything they did.

 

[Optimus Prime]

So to sum up the food offered at GE, not substantial, all vegan, unappealing, and designed to rape your wallet.

Isn't it amazing just how GE manages to suck and blow at the same time?

Actually, let's up the ante, because this isn't even the first time that Disney's made 'alien' food.

That was with Pandora, a land that, effectively, should have been a blueprint for GE to follow. Extensive, well thought out themeing that simulates an alien world, actual stuff in the land to try and convince people that the blue cat smurf people culture exists, two well received rides (one involving a super highly advanced animatronic, the other a simulator), and most relevantly: actual alien looking food.

Granted, I think it boils down to largely vegan offerings shredded up and mixed up so they look like a mish-mash of stuff instead of being instantly recognizable, but it's still a better attempt than literally just laying ribs on crappy mac and cheese and calling it a day. They also basically have giant stuffed meat buns for some reason.

The whole vegan angle is just Disney trying to look like they're with the 'sustainable' movement for brownie points.

Of course, comparing the lands also shows one major difference that really lays out what happened to make them so different: Pandora has one merch shop, two counter service restaurants...and that's it. GE has at least five merch shops, three counter service food locations, and a fucking bar.

GE was meant to push merch HARD purely by situating the majority of the shops between the two rides to funnel foot traffic between them - that's why they even thought opening the land without its "main attraction" was a good idea, because Rise isn't the main attraction in the eyes of Disney, since that money pit isn't making them money per person at the entrance like that stupid pet store!

 

[Muttnik]

Actually, let's up the ante, because this isn't even the first time that Disney's made 'alien' food.

That was with Pandora, a land that, effectively, should have been a blueprint for GE to follow. Extensive, well thought out themeing that simulates an alien world, actual stuff in the land to try and convince people that the blue cat smurf people culture exists, two well received rides (one involving a super highly advanced animatronic, the other a simulator), and most relevantly: actual alien looking food.

Granted, I think it boils down to largely vegan offerings shredded up and mixed up so they look like a mish-mash of stuff instead of being instantly recognizable, but it's still a better attempt than literally just laying ribs on crappy mac and cheese and calling it a day. They also basically have giant stuffed meat buns for some reason.

The whole vegan angle is just Disney trying to look like they're with the 'sustainable' movement for brownie points.

Of course, comparing the lands also shows one major difference that really lays out what happened to make them so different: Pandora has one merch shop, two counter service restaurants...and that's it. GE has at least five merch shops, three counter service food locations, and a fucking bar.

GE was meant to push merch HARD purely by situating the majority of the shops between the two rides to funnel foot traffic between them - that's why they even thought opening the land without its "main attraction" was a good idea, because Rise isn't the main attraction in the eyes of Disney, since that money pit isn't making them money per person at the entrance like that stupid pet store!

The food at Pandora, overpriced junk that it is, at least looks way more appetizing than the stuff at Galaxy's Edge.

That's real meat. It even looks somewhat tender.

 

[Gehenna]

Actually, let's up the ante, because this isn't even the first time that Disney's made 'alien' food.

That was with Pandora, a land that, effectively, should have been a blueprint for GE to follow. Extensive, well thought out themeing that simulates an alien world, actual stuff in the land to try and convince people that the blue cat smurf people culture exists, two well received rides (one involving a super highly advanced animatronic, the other a simulator), and most relevantly: actual alien looking food.

Granted, I think it boils down to largely vegan offerings shredded up and mixed up so they look like a mish-mash of stuff instead of being instantly recognizable, but it's still a better attempt than literally just laying ribs on crappy mac and cheese and calling it a day. They also basically have giant stuffed meat buns for some reason.

The whole vegan angle is just Disney trying to look like they're with the 'sustainable' movement for brownie points.

Of course, comparing the lands also shows one major difference that really lays out what happened to make them so different: Pandora has one merch shop, two counter service restaurants...and that's it. GE has at least five merch shops, three counter service food locations, and a fucking bar.

GE was meant to push merch HARD purely by situating the majority of the shops between the two rides to funnel foot traffic between them - that's why they even thought opening the land without its "main attraction" was a good idea, because Rise isn't the main attraction in the eyes of Disney, since that money pit isn't making them money per person at the entrance like that stupid pet store!

To very, very slightly defend Disney (and then throw them under the bus). The meals are designed to be usable anywhere. Certain religions have restrictions on what you can eat (Muslims and Jews with pork, Hindu's with beef, etc) so it does make sense to just skip past the issue and make food anyone can eat.

That being said, that is no excuse for it being so damn unappealing. Everything shown here is at best something I'd expect to pay 5 bucks for at a fair, and at worst is just plain unappealing.

 

[Vault Boy]

To very, very slightly defend Disney (and then throw them under the bus). The meals are designed to be usable anywhere. Certain religions have restrictions on what you can eat (Muslims and Jews with pork, Hindu's with beef, etc) so it does make sense to just skip past the issue and make food anyone can eat.

And they can't just tell the customers what sort of meat is in each meal because? I get not wanting to get sued, but come on. That would be like if McDonalds no longer sold burgers just because one guy happens to be allergic to beef. Why should everyone have to suffer just to appease such a minority?

Damn, that last bit can apply to all the horseshit Hollywood has pulled in the last five years...

 

[Adamska]

To very, very slightly defend Disney (and then throw them under the bus). The meals are designed to be usable anywhere. Certain religions have restrictions on what you can eat (Muslims and Jews with pork, Hindu's with beef, etc) so it does make sense to just skip past the issue and make food anyone can eat.

That being said, that is no excuse for it being so damn unappealing. Everything shown here is at best something I'd expect to pay 5 bucks for at a fair, and at worst is just plain unappealing.

I can't believe that given all of the religions that you mentioned can all still eat chicken just fine; even the most restrictive (Jains) can just eat fucking salads just fine.

It's pretty clearly just to appeal to the hipster hoboes they think are so prevalent since their marketing staff come from that unprofitable demographic. It also allows them to process beans and arbitrarily charge more for it, on top of already charging way too much for stuff already.

 

[Marissa Moira]

Looking at more food. I know it was covered when the park first opened so I'm just looking at newer videos to see how the food has changed/gone down in quality since then.

View attachment 1035365
Look at the gross solidity of those "ribs". It looks like brownie frosting instead of a nice brown char or gravy. The mac and mashed potatoes beneath look ambiguously like microwaved Stouffers sludge. This shit is $17 bucks.

View attachment 1035370

Oh what the fuck. Junior high food.

View attachment 1035379
View attachment 1035382

Seven bucks for scaly turkey-flavored "jerky".

View attachment 1035385

This is their new vegan Ronto Wrap or whatever the fuck it's called. Looks less like "meat" and more like "mutt", as my old man always used to say.

The jerky I buy for my dogs looks like a better quality than what they serve at the park, it's cheaper too.

 

[Mola Ram]

The jerky I buy for my dogs looks like a better quality than what they serve at the park, it's cheaper too.

Not surprised Disney regards its patrons as no better than animals.

 

[Zaryiu]

Swear to fucking christ though, if they straight up pull a random fucking Reylo ending out of nowhere we all need to write some very strongly worded apology letters to Daddy Lucas for decades of mocking the Anakin-Padme romance....

I wouldn't, Disney atrocities will not change how i feel about Lucas and his fuckups