Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[Adamska]

Shit looks like curly turds. Its greasy bacon wrapped around greasy onion rings and coated with sugar and hot sauce... WTF is this...? This sounds like a mini-heart attack. FYI Hudalla is a nu-planet under Disney that's famous for having the biggest rings in the galaxy and for being the size of Dooku's head/ego? Look, I know I said we need less vegan shit, but I meant something that would look good, not turn more people into vegans.

Seriously, they couldn't just use Wookiee Cookies, Fug Cake or something that's not coated in grease and oil?

Holy shit those are basically a MovieBlob or Jack Scatalini dish. Who did they fucking consult to make these menu items? Was it a drunk Kennedy? A Chapek rooting through the garbage? Actually Bobby Chimpman?

Like for fucks sake, I don't get how you could not be bothered to get actual chefs to come up with their own dishes, and then have them "alien" it up via presentation.

 

[XYZpdq]

Onlines are saying they won't have Baby Yoda crap on the shelves until April.

 

[Trig.Point]

Why is a Religious Site, so on the ball about Star Wars?

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In New Episode, The Mandalorian Has To Protect Baby Yoda From Being Ruined By Rian Johnson

U.S.—In the latest episode of Disney+’s hit show The Mandalorian, Baby Yoda -- widely regarded as the greatest cultural contribution of the last one hundred years -- faces his greatest threat. And that threat: Rian Johnson, full of ideas.“I’ve got some great ideas for your kid there,” says an...

babylonbee.com

 

[Ashen One]

Jesus christ im still not over their apparently planned windowless metal "space cruise hotel" in which they plan to wake guests up in the middle of the night and force them to LARP with the most product consooming attendees they can find that they are #resisting space trump and not allow people to leave for fear it "breaks the immersion"

You know, I've never been fond of horror movies but I have to admit this new direction they are taking with the Saw franchise has me intrigued.

 

[Starscreams Cape]

Why is a Religious Site, so on the ball about Star Wars?View attachment 1036658.

In New Episode, The Mandalorian Has To Protect Baby Yoda From Being Ruined By Rian Johnson

U.S.—In the latest episode of Disney+’s hit show The Mandalorian, Baby Yoda -- widely regarded as the greatest cultural contribution of the last one hundred years -- faces his greatest threat. And that threat: Rian Johnson, full of ideas.“I’ve got some great ideas for your kid there,” says an...

babylonbee.com

And infinitely more funny than The Onion lately.

 

[RomanesEuntDomus]

Jesus christ im still not over their apparently planned windowless metal "space cruise hotel" in which they plan to wake guests up in the middle of the night and force them to LARP with the most product consooming attendees they can find that they are #resisting space trump and not allow people to leave for fear it "breaks the immersion"

I mean....fucking hell the idea of being stuck on this shit actually puts a chill down my spine.

I assume you will be able to opt out of the LARP bullshit and will be able to just sleep a night without being woken up for that nonsense and I don't expect that shit to happen at the dead of night, so there's that.
That's at least what my sane mind would suggest, can't vouch for whatever Kennedy's thinking, though.

 

[The handsome tard]

New pic of the sthuper cool and totally interesting dagger plot device being held by our sour plank protagonist

Rey suggesting they use this as a sex toy and Finn is just like "Bruh" at her suggestion.

 

[Zaryiu]

ACKSHUALLY, it has more to do with:

Mount Doom not having an open top (at least in the books). The Crack of Doom was only accessible by entering a door and going deep into the mountain.

Sauron controlling the weather around Mt. Doom, and being able to kill any Eagle that came near it.

Sauron having flying Nazgul patrolling the sky around his fortress.

Sauron being able to see a bunch of giant Eagles coming thanks to natural and supernatural sentries, and sending his Nazgul and a giant fuck-off army to defend the one doorway into Mt. Doom.

The central theme of the LOTR, which is that sometimes the most important people aren't the biggest and most powerful, but the smallest and most subtle. The God of the LOTR universe basically made Hobbits as a crack stealth squad which could be used to sneak the One Ring past Sauron's Nose and into the Cracks of Doom, which themselves were lightly guarded because Sauron figured (a) the door to the Cracks was close enough to him to be secure and (b) no one who had the One Ring would ever want to destroy it. (To be fair to Sauron, Eru/God had to rig one of the Hobbits to self-destruct in order to get the Ring into the Lava Pit, so technically, the Dark Lord was right about that.)

Sorry to get heated, but that whole "Eagles won't help the heroes because they're huge jerks" argument irks me. Mostly because the Eagles were fairly interventionist when it came to other situations. The real reason the Eagles wouldn't help; weren't even suggested by Gandalf as a potential source of help - is that Eagles aren't stupid enough to go on suicide missions.

What were we talking about again? Oh yeah... Star Wars....

Star Wars was a Fantasy movie with Sci-Fi elements. It managed to remain consistent with its universal rules throughout the first trilogy. At no point did the Jedi's powers break the setting. We didn't see anyone teleport from one place to another like in Star Trek, because if we had, we'd be forced to wonder why people bothered traveling in hyperspace. We never saw the Jedi do any crazy Harry Potter transformation shit, because such things belong in a universe that's higher on the "magic just makes things happen" scale, like how Elsa can make an ice castle and a new set of clothing in Frozen despite knowing nothing about architectural design or creating/dying/decorating fabric.

And the War in the North spinoff game had the Eagle involved in said war so yeah they were occupied fighting other parts of Sauron armies

 

[Ginger Piglet]

That's at least what my sane mind would suggest,

There is nothing sane about the House of Mouse and never has been.

 

[Manwithn0n0men]

And infinitely more funny than The Onion lately.

they guy who co-created Axe cop is one of their writers

 

[The handsome tard]

And the War in the North spinoff game had the Eagle involved in said war so yeah they were occupied fighting other parts of Sauron armies

I dont know why but this talk of LOTR in this Star Wars thread made me remember some scene from some anime that had like, fucking jets against a dragon and the dragon gets realistically blown to pieces by missiles. I guess because it mentioned the eagles fighting and Im just like "just how powerful are those giant birbs?". The image of a Tie Fighter just laying waste of Sauron's Army like its nothing while they just run for safety is freaking hilarious.

 

[Zaryiu]

HAHAWHAHAHAHAHA

View attachment 1031538

Will to live decreasing exponentially

 

[Love Machine]

Well guys.... as this shit fest comes to an end. At least we can appreciate the friends we made along the way in this thread.

 

[Antipathy]

Well guys.... as this shit fest comes to an end. At least we can appreciate the friends we made along the way in this thread.

You're new here. This clusterfuck will ramp up once TROS drops as people flip their shit.
Hope it bombs, that'll be the best case scenario for everything. Tell everyone you know not to watch, and tell them to spread the word.

 

[Love Machine]

Hope it bombs, that'll be the best case scenario for everything.

 

[Oskar Dirlewanger]

How are you supposed to kill someone with that hunk of plastic? It looks less sharp than a butter knife and would probably snap in that middle bit if you tried to stab someone with it. THIS IS A UNIVERSE WITH BLADES THAT CAN CUT THROUGH BLAST DOORS, WHY ARE THEY USING THIS STUPID CHUNK OF FUCK?

I thought the Sith dagger would be sleek, red, and black, you know, like a Sith Dagger would look like. Something made out of obsidian with jagged edges and a silver or gold hilt, with ominous red runes carved in the flat, not a goddamn toy spaceship with a handle glued on the bottom.

How the fuck you gonna sell someone with edges to 8 year olds? This is obviously designed to look as non threatening as possible so parents would want to buy the plastic/styrofoam toy for their kids. This "dagger" looks so unknifely by design, so that the toy can be sold even in countries like Britain where anti-knife hysteria is the current year ideology. You people keep making the same mistake of forgetting Star War are TOY ADVERTS and not actual films made for the enjoyment of adult audience.

 

[Gehenna]

Honestly the entire genre of "media based cookbooks" needs to go away and die. At absolute best they just offer mediocre rehashes of basic shit you can find in any dime store book section or five second google search, and at worst the recipes within are just straight up disgusting and inedible.

Perhaps the only halfway respectable examples are ones that are half tongue in cheek "in universe" works that function decently enough as a spinoff novella, like that discworld cookbook from ages ago which combined the aforementioned "mediocre but passable recipes" style cookbooks with a bunch of prose from the character depicted as writing said cookbook.

And before anyone mentions a certain bald youtuber cookuck, remember that any recipe attempted/adapted by him is either ultra generic or has to be heavily modified if not changed entirely to be edible.

The Elder Scrolls one was pretty good... a few unique recipes mixed in with rehashed ones, while the descriptions provide lore on their respective regions.

The Star Wars one though, is just... the worst of everything.

 

[Love Machine]

How the fuck you gonna sell someone with edges to 8 year olds? This is obviously designed to look as non threatening as possible so parents would want to buy the plastic/styrofoam toy for their kids. This "dagger" looks so unknifely by design, so that the toy can be sold even in countries like Britain where anti-knife hysteria is the current year ideology. You people keep making the same mistake of forgetting Star War are TOY ADVERTS and not actual films made for the enjoyment of adult audience.

Wampas, the sarlac pit, and jabbas men had points tho. It could be an excuse, but its not a good one.


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[Vault Boy]

Man, that moment when the cast was asked to give those facial expressions.

1. It is 100% giving off the same energy as Emilia Clarke's infamous "Best season ever ... !" moment.

2. J.J. Abrams was seriously staring down at all of the actors during that moment. He was looking at every single one of them. I don't know what kind of energy that's giving off, but if I had to guess, it's either "Oh no, please don't fuck this up guys" or "You BETTER not fuck this up, guys" His body language was not one of a calm, cool, and collected person.

3. Boyega's non-reaction spoke volumes, as well as Oscar Issac's clapping at Anthony Daniels' "40 years for THIS" comment.

This could all be a joke. But then again, this Trilogy has been the real joke, so ...

They won't say it, but they know this movie won't exactly be a high point of their careers.

Even if the movie somehow turns out to be alright, I can imagine how much of a nightmare the production had to have been.

 

[Antipathy]

How the fuck you gonna sell someone with edges to 8 year olds? This is obviously designed to look as non threatening as possible so parents would want to buy the plastic/styrofoam toy for their kids. This "dagger" looks so unknifely by design, so that the toy can be sold even in countries like Britain where anti-knife hysteria is the current year ideology. You people keep making the same mistake of forgetting Star War are TOY ADVERTS and not actual films made for the enjoyment of adult audience.

See, I would respond to this autist, but the thing is he blocked me because I hurt his feefees and he takes immense pride in maintaining a block list.