- Joined
- Aug 3, 2017
Sure, Tess. Your bad skin was caused by a single soda, after not drinking sodas in like forever, y'all!
*insert bitch why you lyin' video here*
Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud
- Thread starter BILLY MAYS
- Start date
Sure, Tess. Your bad skin was caused by a single soda, after not drinking sodas in like forever, y'all!
*insert bitch why you lyin' video here*
- Joined
- Dec 3, 2019
That is an EXTREMELY tacky shirt, holy hell.
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2017
Yet another lame attempt to fool everyone into thinking a she's a still a 22 (even worse, now she's claiming to be a 20. Surrrrrrrrre)
Like other Kiwis have guessed, I have no doubt that it's split in the front just so it will fit over her carcass. Those rolled up sleeves make me think that her massive armhocks burst the sleeve hems, then rolled them up to hide the damage and get what's left to fit on her arms.
Like other Kiwis have guessed, I have no doubt that it's split in the front just so it will fit over her carcass. Those rolled up sleeves make me think that her massive armhocks burst the sleeve hems, then rolled them up to hide the damage and get what's left to fit on her arms.
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2019
It looks like one of the million free t-shirts sorority girls accumulate for their various charity events and socials. AKA not something a grown adult woman needs to be wearing, and not something anyone should pay for.
- Joined
- Sep 6, 2017
I mean, for a workout or weekend shirt, whatever. It is still no worse than other graphic tees.
The main LOL is her attempting to convince people she fits into the shirt the way it's intended to fit.
The main LOL is her attempting to convince people she fits into the shirt the way it's intended to fit.
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2018
The fuck is wrong with her? Why is her tongue out like that? I've never seen anyone that looks cute on.
Also, she really needs to not wear leggings. A fucking tarp worn as a skirt would be more flattering at this point.
- Joined
- Aug 16, 2018
Leggings on women as fat as Tess look like sausage casing. Also, tight clothing in addition to being super fat with bad hygiene is a great way to get a yeast infection. I can’t imagine how nasty her leggings smell after wearing them all day.
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- Joined
- May 15, 2018
So it seems like Tess is somehow managing to escape the wrath of the rabid HAES/FA mobese crowd for the moment by calling dieting "self-care." Anything is OK as long as it's self-care or "listening to your body"! (These euphemisms are so transparent and stupid.) Tess clearly wants to lose some weight (whether she's going to is another story, of course) and absolutely hates her disgusting fat arms.
Also, she's hawking a completely unnecessary $28 supplement called Hydrate in this story. Gee, I thought water alone was hydrating enough. Silly me! Oh, and Hydrate promises fat loss and appetite control as well. She really takes her audience for fools.
Also, she's hawking a completely unnecessary $28 supplement called Hydrate in this story. Gee, I thought water alone was hydrating enough. Silly me! Oh, and Hydrate promises fat loss and appetite control as well. She really takes her audience for fools.
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2017
Isn't posting these paid sponsorships without stating as much in the post a big legal no-no? Even if Tess was only given these quack diet aids for free instead of a paycheck, it's still verboten to leave that fact out.
(source: the wannabe InstaThot my cousin married, who has to point out any sponsorships on posts that she's hawking stuff on)
$20 bucks says that she gobbled some cake and ice cream after she took a few bites of her "healthy meal"
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2016
That chicken stir fry is at least 800 calories. Fats always think brown carbs somehow magically don't have calories. No, fatties, they usually have even more calories. And just because your regular greasy spoon Chinese place put a few peppers in your oily fry up and a different color rice underneath doesn't magically make you skinny. That is a cheat meal.
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2017
Precisely. Brown rice is only marginally healthier than white rice. If it's fried instead of steamed, then it's just a carb, salt, and fat bomb. Stir fried veggies are pretty healthy, but not if they are drowned in those brown sauces loaded with sugar and sodium. Between her lack of exercise, use of quack diet supplements, and terrible eating habits, Two Ton Tess is soon going to be Three Ton Tess.
Those poor kids are going to be stuck on fold cleaning duty until the day they leave home.
LetThemEatCake
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 23, 2019
Honestly, I do not get the reliance on takeaway food if you're trying to lose weight. Cook at home and you control what is going into the food and can figure out the calorie count to a reasonably accurate degree, as well as control the portion size. Takeout food is always going to be made with a lot of added fats and salt to boost the taste, even alleged 'healthy' options. Not to mention takeout portions are usually going to be far bigger than a single person really needs because businesses need to show their food is value for money.
Learn to cook simple meals from scratch, Tess. I promise you it's the best way to control your calorie and nutrient intake.
Brown rice is great btw. It's a low glycemic index food that won't spike your blood sugar, has a lot of fibre to help your gut and fill you up and has nutrients and vitamins white rice doesn't. Always better to get a whole grain rather than the denuded, refined version. Just don't fry it in oil, ffs, if you're trying to cut calories and eat less generally.
Learn to cook simple meals from scratch, Tess. I promise you it's the best way to control your calorie and nutrient intake.
Brown rice is great btw. It's a low glycemic index food that won't spike your blood sugar, has a lot of fibre to help your gut and fill you up and has nutrients and vitamins white rice doesn't. Always better to get a whole grain rather than the denuded, refined version. Just don't fry it in oil, ffs, if you're trying to cut calories and eat less generally.
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- Joined
- Feb 21, 2016
Busy getting laser wrinkle and smoothing treatments that dont work (you can botox LIGHTLY, periodically, before you invest in a facelift if you must*). This is the only way she can fake cheekbones now: massive fatty suprise face
Her last client was a sped gender speshul undies place for fats. Still plugging for $$
* the multiverse is An Old, and experienced in graceful aging as need be.
Her last client was a sped gender speshul undies place for fats. Still plugging for $$
* the multiverse is An Old, and experienced in graceful aging as need be.
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- Joined
- May 15, 2018
^I can really tell the effects of her laser sessions when she uses that ridiculous kawaii tweenage filter that covers up her textured, blotchy skin!
LetThemEatCake
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Sep 23, 2019
Best ant-wrinkle device is good old broad spectrum sunscreen, used all year round, daily. Prevent, don't try to 'cure'. Cure always looks odd at best.
Not sure why you'd bother trying to freeze your face when you're letting your entire body descend into vastly accelerated ageing both inside and out anyway. Tess's joints must be those of a fucked-up 60 year old already. Wait til the FUPA skin gives up and collapses. Nothing young-looking about that, whatever bloat you've managed to put in your face.
Not sure why you'd bother trying to freeze your face when you're letting your entire body descend into vastly accelerated ageing both inside and out anyway. Tess's joints must be those of a fucked-up 60 year old already. Wait til the FUPA skin gives up and collapses. Nothing young-looking about that, whatever bloat you've managed to put in your face.
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2018
Bold of you to assume she'll be alive 15 more years til Bowie is old enough to leave home. At the rate she's going she might be alive when Rylee leaves, but not Bowie.
- Joined
- Apr 1, 2015
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2017
Nick, stop trying to suck up to Miss Manatee. If you had a million dollars, Messy Tessy would demand it in the divorce and leave you with nothing as she spends it on food and alcohol binges at Disney while the kids sit home alone.
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- Joined
- Aug 5, 2017
But I thought he was a millionaire businessman. Or is the Australian dollar really devalued lately?
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2016
Ex wife, eh? Time to check the Nevada public records.
I can only find their Clark County marriage certificate from July 2015; divorce records are part of family court. They may have filed for divorce in California, however.