Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[Creep3r]

Something about that character and that actress rubs me the wrong way. When I see her face, I can't help but feel annoyed.

Aside from looking like some Tumblr drone's avatar, she's doing that fucking Dreamworks smirk.

New movie clip from the star wars/fortnite event

So the first thing the troopers do is ask for ID and credentials? What use are those now that there's no galactic government of any kind? Fake IDs must be booming in this retarded era. I mean the FO is just a bunch of crazy assholes who were hiding out in the Unknown Regions for 30 years then they come out of hiding, set up a casino, then they start kidnapping kids, stripping planets of their resources, blowing up planets they don't need, and they end it all by blowing up the new seat of galactic government and killing their own head of government which no doubt might've caused the FO to become splintered. These dumbfucks don't have a single thing under their control, and their home planet and flagship got fucking total'd.

The FO are nothing more than whacked out terrorists with no clear aim or goal other than blowing shit up and getting money from casinos. They're like some silly 80s cartoon villains. In fact, that's exactly what they are. They are exactly the same as the villains from that old Silverhawks cartoon, just a whacked out edgy despot in a goofy mask with no clear goals or motivation who lives on a planet converted into a superweapon and has his gang go around destroying shit for no reason and who gets all his money from a casino.

And despite all the bullshit the FO did, Disney wants us to believe the New Republic didn't have enough evidence or reason to see them as a threat? So much so they even got rid of all their military power? To the point where they rejected all of Leia's requests to re-establish one and then they just kick her out and brand her a traitor? Who thought this kind of plot made any fucking sense? And people expect me to believe JJ and the Story Group's world building and plot for TFA was serviceable!? Give me a break.

Also...

DAY 1!
1 DAY LEFT UNTIL PLAN 9: THE FALL OF SKYWALKER...

It was a pleasure gentlemen... but tomorrow... the nightmare begins...

SpongeBob SquarePants Production Music - Botany Bay (b)

Composer: Robert Alexander White Plays in many episodes, like Arrgh!, Squeaky Boots and Mid Life Crustacean.

www.youtube.com

 

[qu_rahn]

The Empire did have tracked/wheeled land vehicles & troop transports - can't forget the ol' Juggernaut https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/HAVw_A6_Juggernaut/Legends

The Battle of Hoth was originally going to feature these but Lucasfilm scrapped them in favor of AT-ATs

 

[Godzilla@1989]

Oh wow, @GeneralFriendliness, Bob Chipman has unleashed his Really That Good on A New Hope. And it’s cringe.

It’s apparently blocked on YouTube, here’s the link to Vimeo if you want to cringe.

Really That Good - STAR WARS

REALLY THAT GOOD is an independent work from MovieBob Productions. If you enjoy it and want to see more like it, please consider supporting The MovieBob Patreon:…

vimeo.com

 

[Creep3r]

The Empire did have tracked land vehicles & troop transports - can't forget the ol' Juggernaut https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/HAVw_A6_Juggernaut/Legends

The Battle of Hoth was originally going to feature these but Lucasfilm scrapped them in favor of AT-ATs

I don't think anyone's arguing against the usefulness of tracked vehicles or denying their existence. Its only within the context of treadspeeders and how completely ineffective it would be on them. Also why make a vehicle that's half ground and half repulsor lift? Especially on a vehicle that prioritizes speed over offense. And the repulsor feature only exists to serve as a catapult, which again, for a jetrooper, a gunship would be far more effective. If they needed a cool-looking ground vehicle with treads that's almost as fast as a speeder and also comes with walker legs, thus making it all-terrain, why not just use wheel bikes?

Or just regular speeders? Not like you needed a tread vehicle on a dustball. And a tread+repulsor combo just sounds like an unstable accident waiting to happen, especially on a light weight vehicle that's supposed to emphasize speed above offense and defense. A better alternative would be a vehicle that can switch between a land mode and a hover mode, so why not just use that? Oh yeah, because then we can't have the stupid catapult gimmick.

 

[Intelligent Calcium]

Oh wow, @GeneralFriendliness, Bob Chipman has unleashed his Really That Good on A New Hope. And it’s cringe.

It’s apparently blocked on YouTube, here’s the link to Vimeo if you want to cringe.

Really That Good - STAR WARS

REALLY THAT GOOD is an independent work from MovieBob Productions. If you enjoy it and want to see more like it, please consider supporting The MovieBob Patreon:…

vimeo.com

90 minutes.
Whoever tl;dw's this is a hero.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

90 minutes.
Whoever tl;dw's this is a hero.

Robert is too fucking cringe for me to watch. He has horrible analysis on the film he “reviews” and has a severe lack of brevity.

 

[Rob_Mercury]

90 minutes.
Whoever tl;dw's this is a hero.

He takes six minutes to get to the fucking point and it feels like 15.

tl;dw
Spends the better part of 13 minutes going on about how one of a kind Star Wars is and how all the pieces are explained to make sense from the start and makes a western connection which turns into a minor racism accusation.

blah blah right place in time, blah blah special effects. 20 minutes in and because he's talking about a piece of French literature he's in black and white in front of a Paris green screen wearing a beret

2 minutes of him explaining auteur theory then another two minutes how this came to influence George Lucas and directors like Spielberg.

Jumps around for a minute that what makes Lucas stand out among others is how weird/non-mainstream he is & how this is reflected in a New Hope. Without a warning he drops "narratively subversive" and cuts to TLJ. Now we're talking S U B V E R S I O N.

This is what Bob counts as subversive in A New Hope:

• The opening of the movie because we don't know what's going on and we spend most of our time with two robots

(also is Bob from Boston? I do my best to stay away from him and anything he's involved with so I don't know much about him. I ask because he begins pronouncing words without a "r".)

• Luke getting his father's light saber without any cue from the camera or the music that the sword is special. (contradicting his own set premise of only looking at this movie as Star Wars not Episode 4.)
• The cantina scene for throwing the audience into Lucas his weirdness. (for the record I'm 36 minutes in and it takes him 10 minutes to name three acts of subversion and we're not even halfway through the movie

Took him 12 minutes to say fuck all.
At the halfway mark and all he's been doing for 7 minutes now is gushing over why Han is a amazing character. (also something about how you can draw parallels between Star Wars and Smokey and the Bandit. (he actually says this))
It eventually lasts 9 minutes and it ends with him heavily implying that Rose Tico is the new Han Solo. He actually does this.

T H E M E S
I'm just gonna list the themes Bob says play in New Hope cause that's what he is doing right now.
Working class theme (Luke is a farmer)
Spirtuality (the Jedi and the Force)
Moral ambiguity (Han saving the day in the climax)
Honoring treaties (Tarkin blowing up Alderaan despite promising Leia otherwise)
Sexism (Leia telling Luke and Han what to do and them looking bummed out by it)
Racism ("We don't serve their kind here")
Institutional order (the Senate being disbanded)
Religious intolerance (that one Empire official insulting the Sith ways before being choked by Vader)

But the biggest theme: War (war never changes) Also sci-fi and Star Wars fans are stupid for saying that Star Wars was never political because every war is political (they aren't). He also says that war is pretty much a extension of politics which eerily reminds me of a few Mao Zedong quotes. Also, Thanos is a Malthusian. (yes he brings this up).

Yadda yadda civil rights movements, blah blah Vietnam (brings up that directors like Lucas and Spielberg had to a degree been confronted with this even if not drafted (Lucas wasn't because diabetes)) and how Star Wars really is an excuse for a good vs evil war movie without stepping on toes with Vietnam just done and the world wars being less relevant to audiences.

Expect he says it isn't but that regardless of the intent of Lucas and others involved with making the movie this is the end-product.

I give up. Time off death: 1:03:38. Fuck this retard. Fuck me for wasting my time. I'm gonna go kill myself. I'll see you tomorrow.

 

[Iceland Heavy]

Oh wow, @GeneralFriendliness, Bob Chipman has unleashed his Really That Good on A New Hope. And it’s cringe.

It’s apparently blocked on YouTube, here’s the link to Vimeo if you want to cringe.

Really That Good - STAR WARS

REALLY THAT GOOD is an independent work from MovieBob Productions. If you enjoy it and want to see more like it, please consider supporting The MovieBob Patreon:…

vimeo.com

I'm not touching that autistic ramble, but I'm just going to guess he spends a good chunk of it ranting about the horrible toxic fans and that ANH is great, but not in the nostalgic way the stupid obsolete fans remember it and that the disney shitquels are bringing Star Wars into the Superior Future. And also probably some throwaway snipes at the prequels too.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

I'm not touching that autistic ramble, but I'm just going to guess he spends a good chunk of it ranting about the horrible toxic fans and that ANH is great, but not in the nostalgic way the stupid obsolete fans remember it and that the disney shitquels are bringing Star Wars into the Superior Future. And also probably some throwaway snipes at the prequels too.

Unless IX’s box office flopping finally gives him his heart attack.

 

[Creep3r]

So it seems Kennedy is trying to claim that the leaks and reveals were an intentional part of her grand plan, not a strategic one according to her, but a "plan" nonetheless to try and encourage fan speculation and theories... Are there honestly any Palpatine theories going around for IX? Because all I've seen are shitposts. Nothing on par with the shitty Snoke theories.

Lucasfilm Exec Kathleen Kennedy Explains Why Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Trailers Spoiled Major Reveals

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker marketing has been purposefully more revealing to welcome [...]

comicbook.com

(Warning to all of you with sensitive ears: content contains Geeky Sparkles' voice)

Edit:
So Dr. Aphra may not be the only cartoon coming to Disney+... We might be getting another fucking Space Aladdin cartoon too according to one of the assholes running the SW website...

I can only hope he misspelled too as two and that only Ezra is getting a cartoon...

Also Daisy Ridley says the ending to IX will be sad. So I'm guessing either Kylo Ren does stay dead, Chewie, Lando, 3PO and R2 do die with the Falcon, or both happen. Either way expect backlash.

Daisy Ridley on Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker: ‘There’s real sadness at the end’

PASADENA, Calif. — Just as elements of destiny have circled her character Rey in Lucasfilm’s rebooted

torontosun.com

 

[verissimus]

So it seems Kennedy is trying to claim that the leaks and reveals were an intentional part of her grand plan, not a strategic one according to her, but a "plan" nonetheless to try and encourage fan speculation and theories... Are there honestly any Palpatine theories going around for IX? Because all I've seen are shitposts. Nothing on par with the shitty Snoke theories.

Lucasfilm Exec Kathleen Kennedy Explains Why Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Trailers Spoiled Major Reveals

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker marketing has been purposefully more revealing to welcome [...]

comicbook.com

(Warning to all of you with sensitive ears: content contains Geeky Sparkles' voice)

Edit:
So Dr. Aphra may not be the only cartoon coming to Disney+... We might be getting another fucking Space Aladdin cartoon too according to one of the assholes running the SW website...
View attachment 1051984
I can only hope he misspelled too as two and that only Ezra is getting a cartoon...

Also Daisy Ridley says the ending to IX will be sad. So I'm guessing either Kylo Ren does stay dead, Chewie, Lando, 3PO and R2 do die with the Falcon, or both happen. Either way expect backlash.

Daisy Ridley on Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker: ‘There’s real sadness at the end’

PASADENA, Calif. — Just as elements of destiny have circled her character Rey in Lucasfilm’s rebooted

torontosun.com

Yeah she should be sad because she isn't going to get any major role after this.

 

[Jaimas]

He takes six minutes to get to the fucking point and it feels like 15.

tl;dw
Spends the better part of 13 minutes going on about how one of a kind Star Wars is and how all the pieces are explained to make sense from the start and makes a western connection which turns into a minor racism accusation.

blah blah right place in time, blah blah special effects. 20 minutes in and because he's talking about a piece of French literature he's in black and white in front of a Paris green screen wearing a beret
View attachment 1051935
2 minutes of him explaining auteur theory then another two minutes how this came to influence George Lucas and directors like Spielberg.

Jumps around for a minute that what makes Lucas stand out among others is how weird/non-mainstream he is & how this is reflected in a New Hope. Without a warning he drops "narratively subversive" and cuts to TLJ. Now we're talking S U B V E R S I O N.

This is what Bob counts as subversive in A New Hope:

• The opening of the movie because we don't know what's going on and we spend most of our time with two robots

(also is Bob from Boston? I do my best to stay away from him and anything he's involved with so I don't know much about him. I ask because he begins pronouncing words without a "r".)

• Luke getting his father's light saber without any cue from the camera or the music that the sword is special. (contradicting his own set premise of only looking at this movie as Star Wars not Episode 4.)
• The cantina scene for throwing the audience into Lucas his weirdness. (for the record I'm 36 minutes in and it takes him 10 minutes to name three acts of subversion and we're not even halfway through the movie

Took him 12 minutes to say fuck all.
At the halfway mark and all he's been doing for 7 minutes now is gushing over why Han is a amazing character. (also something about how you can draw parallels between Star Wars and Smokey and the Bandit. (he actually says this))
It eventually lasts 9 minutes and it ends with him heavily implying that Rose Tico is the new Han Solo. He actually does this.

T H E M E S
I'm just gonna list the themes Bob says play in New Hope cause that's what he is doing right now.
Working class theme (Luke is a farmer)
Spirtuality (the Jedi and the Force)
Moral ambiguity (Han saving the day in the climax)
Honoring treaties (Tarkin blowing up Alderaan despite promising Leia otherwise)
Sexism (Leia telling Luke and Han what to do and them looking bummed out by it)
Racism ("We don't serve their kind here")
Institutional order (the Senate being disbanded)
Religious intolerance (that one Empire official insulting the Sith ways before being choked by Vader)

But the biggest theme: War (war never changes) Also sci-fi and Star Wars fans are stupid for saying that Star Wars was never political because every war is political (they aren't). He also says that war is pretty much a extension of politics which eerily reminds me of a few Mao Zedong quotes. Also, Thanos is a Malthusian. (yes he brings this up).

Yadda yadda civil rights movements, blah blah Vietnam (brings up that directors like Lucas and Spielberg had to a degree been confronted with this even if not drafted (Lucas wasn't because diabetes)) and how Star Wars really is an excuse for a good vs evil war movie without stepping on toes with Vietnam just done and the world wars being less relevant to audiences.

Expect he says it isn't but that regardless of the intent of Lucas and others involved with making the movie this is the end-product.

I've always wondered why I can listen to HackFraudMedia or MauLer expound for several hours, but I can barely stand listening to Moviebob for more than a few minutes without desiring to throw a chair at him.

Watching this video, I finally understand why this is: Moviebob's boundless sophistry. The dude constantly acts like he's smarter and outright better than you, the simple plebian who cannot understand the genius about Star Wars without his mensa-level intellect. No content creator before and none since has ever been able so knowledgable as to pick out the hidden meanings your average 12-year old picked up on throughout the movie.

Basically he's a living, breathing version of this fucking copypasta, is what I'm getting at.

So it seems Kennedy is trying to claim that the leaks and reveals were an intentional part of her grand plan, not a strategic one according to her, but a "plan" nonetheless to try and encourage fan speculation and theories... Are there honestly any Palpatine theories going around for IX? Because all I've seen are shitposts. Nothing on par with the shitty Snoke theories.

Lucasfilm Exec Kathleen Kennedy Explains Why Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Trailers Spoiled Major Reveals

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker marketing has been purposefully more revealing to welcome [...]

comicbook.com

(Warning to all of you with sensitive ears: content contains Geeky Sparkles' voice)

Edit:
So Dr. Aphra may not be the only cartoon coming to Disney+... We might be getting another fucking Space Aladdin cartoon too according to one of the assholes running the SW website...
View attachment 1051984
I can only hope he misspelled too as two and that only Ezra is getting a cartoon...

Also Daisy Ridley says the ending to IX will be sad. So I'm guessing either Kylo Ren does stay dead, Chewie, Lando, 3PO and R2 do die with the Falcon, or both happen. Either way expect backlash.

Daisy Ridley on Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker: ‘There’s real sadness at the end’

PASADENA, Calif. — Just as elements of destiny have circled her character Rey in Lucasfilm’s rebooted

torontosun.com

Yeah, no. I'm not buying this. This reeks of "we killed our fanbase off and we have absolutely no ideas on how to save it so our only recourse is to pretend that we have the new one that has utterly supplanted it, which we will assert without evidence from now until the next shareholder's meeting, at which point we will be yeeted from Disney HQ via trebuchet."

 

[Optimus Prime]

Yeah, no. I'm not buying this. This reeks of "we killed our fanbase off and we have absolutely no ideas on how to save it so our only recourse is to pretend that we have the new one that has utterly supplanted it, which we will assert without evidence from now until the next shareholder's meeting, at which point we will be yeeted from Disney HQ via trebuchet."

The sooner that talentless hack is out the better.

 

[Marissa Moira]

I've always wondered why I can listen to HackFraudMedia or MauLer expound for several hours, but I can barely stand listening to Moviebob for more than a few minutes without desiring to throw a chair at him.

Watching this video, I finally understand why this is: Moviebob's boundless sophistry. The dude constantly acts like he's smarter and outright better than you, the simple plebian who cannot understand the genius about Star Wars without his mensa-level intellect. No content creator before and none since has ever been able so knowledgable as to pick out the hidden meanings your average 12-year old picked up on throughout the movie.

Basically he's a living, breathing version of this fucking copypasta, is what I'm getting at.



Yeah, no. I'm not buying this. This reeks of "we killed our fanbase off and we have absolutely no ideas on how to save it so our only recourse is to pretend that we have the new one that has utterly supplanted it, which we will assert without evidence from now until the next shareholder's meeting, at which point we will be yeeted from Disney HQ via trebuchet."

But dude, Super Mario brothers 3 getting released was bigger than JFK getting killed.

 

[Jub-Jub]

Also Daisy Ridley says the ending to IX will be sad.

True, Ridley taking the Skywalker name and stealing a legacy that isn't hers does fill me with sadness.

 

[TerminalTryHard]

True, Ridley taking the Skywalker name and stealing a legacy that isn't hers does fill me with sadness.

But Jesus Christ does it sure sum up the ST nicely tho.

 

[Marissa Moira]

It's going to be funny when Ghostbusters:Afterlife outgrosses Star Wars.

 

[Creep3r]

It's going to be funny when Ghostbusters:Afterlife outgrosses Star Wars.

So what are Jumanji 3's chances then?
View attachment 1052158

 

[Love Machine]

All I have to say that those new jetpack troopers aren't my darktroopers.

Also it's really strange that they say "they fly now?!?!?" while off the top of my head there were 3 jetpack variants for clones, and 4 for stormtrooper.s Most I'm pretty sure are still canon. Why are they so surprised?

 

[Marissa Moira]

So what are Jumanji 3's chances then?
View attachment 1052158

King Kong, Jumanji and Rampage surprisingly enough were responsible for a smaller toy company called Lanard Toys to expand after they made enough money off of those movie franchises.

They're now producing new Alien and Aliens toys in the spirit of the Kenner originals(they're making this fuckoff huge Alien Queen figure that comes with a nest and it won't break the bank either). Lanard also puts out The Corps. toyline which was originally a GIJoe knockoff but now is the only toy line standing of it's kind and the vehicles fit Joes perfectly. They've also made spinoffs like Primal Clash which replace military vehicles for armored prehistoric animals.

The queen stand a foot tall so it's a big girl

If Disney would stop meddling, they could easily have made Star Wars a big seller rather than a kiss of death. Kids and collectors want Stormtroopers, Droids, and Aliens of assorted types and vehicles to have the figures ride around in, it's not hard.