Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

They neatly dumped the idea that the true villains of the franchise were the military industrial bankster interests (Hey, wasn't the primary help against the Republic the trade federation, remember that?). I just read a review that talked about that cynical hacker who hacked for both sides of every conflict said about the financiers of the war in the Sequel trilogy.

"Let me learn ya something, Finn. These guys made a lot of money, they are arms dealers to both sides of every conflict. They made half their money selling to the so-called bad guys, the First Order...how do you think they made the other half? SELLING TO THE "GOOD GUYS!" Its all a big machine, live free, don't join."


That counterfeits the whole franchise. It makes everybody some patsy or paypig to an intergalactic banking cartel that foments conflict and finances and sells to both sides.
Emperor Palpatine isn't the biggest antagonist in Star Wars, he's just its biggest patsy and paypig.
 
I have zero interest in Star Wars so i'm kinda feeling left out making fun of this gargantuan trainwreck.

Screen_Shot_2017-11-10_at_10.36.15_AM.png

Oh well.
You guys have fun.
 
I suffered through TROS for a friend's sake last night. Even with enough boxed wine to sedate a neurotic cat lady from Newport Beach, it stung to watch. Then the only character who was even remotely interesting is, well, certainly not reappearing after this one, and I wouldn't even care if the rest got Poochied by the next film. I don't even remember the new characters or why they were in the movie.

It's funny, I think Mon Mothma has less screentime in ROTJ than Poe's old booty call does in TROS, but Mon Mothma is a far more memorable character because of how she's used: to sell you on the gravity of the opportunity the Rebellion has at Endor, and the incredible human (well, Bothan) cost that opportunity demanded. Same with the bad guys, too. Hux is played by a phenomenal actor, but simply by the strength of how their parts are written, Admiral Piett and General Veers are still unmatched as the "on the ground" Imperial everymen. Hux might have a pretty little "dastardly" speech before he blows up a bunch of planets, but somehow, Veers comes off as a far more menacing presence in that slow, inexorable AT-AT march to blow up a shield generator, and Piett feels like more of a person than Hux does. They're obviously never sympathetic, but they are interesting, and not treated as jokes. You want that in your bad guys, even the bit parts.

Don't even get me started on Maz Canada or whatever her stupid name is. If you offered up a draft with a character like that in a creative writing workshop, she would deserve no more than the word "superfluous" scrawled in red in the margins of her introduction.

It's strange that, for as much money as Disney has, the most memorable side character probably IS that one unnamed stormtrooper in TFA that feeds Finn his own elbows in a fair fight while he's wielding Anakin Skywalker's lightsaber.

I have more of a rant in me, but at the end of the day, the simple truth is that you could be forgiven for assuming these movies were made by people who do not care about Star Wars.

Because you're probably right.
 
Who doesn't? They're fucking hideous. Also I find it amusing that Hidalgo keeps pushing these guys as "Ithorian cousins with a different name" despite all concept art and promo shit calling them Ithorians.

Also this thing was in IX.
View attachment 1066178
According to the IX dictionary, his species has no eyes, nose, ears or even a brain. Instead its main sensory organ and nerves are in its mouth, so its head is just one giant fanged mouth and it constantly needs to grin to be able to sense things. The machine over his mouth is used as a substitute for brain, eyes, and ears... These things are naturally born like this? Who came up with these horrors? Does someone in the costume department have a fetish for brainless things? Or is this a metaphor for how Disney wishes its fans could be like?

It looks like a Strogg from the “Quake” games.
 
I actually chose to fix that nightmare tooth thing:
View attachment 1066219

Not the greatest edit (200+ hours in paint.net), but a shitload better looking with a half-mask for it.
I did my best. I tried to make him look like a pre-Disney alien, although the only one that I could think of with big teeth to match that body type were the karkarodons from Filoni Wars.
Karkarodan Bounty Hunter.png
1577223773126.png
1577217091792-png.1066178
 
Last edited:
I did my best. I tried to make him look like a pre-Disney alien, although the only one that I could think of with big teeth to match that body type were the karkarodons from Filoni Wars.
View attachment 1066281View attachment 1066267

Good job, also it looks better than the traced one in Alien Archive. Alot of the images are unfournately traced in this book, which is often jarring as some are traced from live action and others from the cartoons.
crappy scan.png
 
Good job, also it looks better than the traced one in Alien Archive.
View attachment 1066286
Wow so they didn't even bother to draw original artwork from scratch? They just poorly traced pre-existing photos and artwork? What is it with Disney and tracing other people's shit? Makes everything they produce feel like some chinese knockoff.
 
Looks like you're going with one of those Japanesesque mask looks.

I was mostly just looking for a half mask to cover that fugly teeth, noted the Japanese half mask and thought why not? I mean Vader had some of that influence after all.

My original idea was to make the one I used a gas mask, but it looked really shit when I tried that.
I did my best. I tried to make him look like a pre-Disney alien, although the only one that I could think of with big teeth to match that body type were the karkarodons from Filoni Wars.
View attachment 1066281View attachment 1066267
It's impressive how randos on the net legit are just more competent than even the paid designers for this franchise. It's fucking pathetic.
Wow so they didn't even bother to draw original artwork from scratch? They just poorly traced pre-existing photos and artwork? What is it with Disney and tracing other people's shit? Makes everything they produce feel like some chinese knockoff.
Maybe they're trying to be more akin to a Chinese company so that the Chinamen consoom product... or they're incompetent and lazy monkeys.
 
TROS has reached 55% on RT amongst all critics. If you selevt "Top Critics" it's even down to 49%. Just... wow. Disney.

MovieBob is literally the only defender of this piece of shit dumpster fire.
View attachment 1066040
So, what scene is he talking about?
I literally can't remember one scene that was the least bit memorable, since everything is so bland. Which is a fascinating concept to ponder:
The movie manages to have such "run-of-the-mill" overblown action scenes, they become "bland".

Like that scene where Rey somersaults over a TIE-Fighter? Somehow, that manages to be bland. It's surreal on how many levels this movie fucks up and how.

Dropping fast. It'll be interesting to see what the second weekend drop will be.


DateDOWRankDaily%± YD%± LWTheatersAvgTo DateDay
Dec 20, 2019Friday1$89,615,288--4,406$20,339$89,615,2881
Dec 21, 2019Saturday1$47,467,565-47%-4,406$10,773$137,082,8532
Dec 22, 2019Sunday1$40,301,011-15.1%-4,406$9,146$177,383,8643
Dec 23, 2019Monday1$29,200,000-27.5%-4,406$6,627$206,583,8644

I'd be surprised if Disney lose money on this though.
I doubt Disney will lose money, it won't be a bomb, but it won't be the success they need if they want to get back their 4 Billion dollars any time soon.
However the damage to the brand might be pretty heavy.

Still hoping for a 60-70% decline in viewership for the next weekend.
 
Back