Chantal Sarault / Chantal Al-Refae / Foodie Beauty - Delusional drug fiend hamplanet mukbanger from Canada trying to be a glamorous online influencer. Pathological liar, huge bitch, narcissist, animal abuser

Chinny was carrying a caesar to her little corner of muckbang hell when she tripped and fell. The Extreme Bean garnish jammed straight up her nose and twirled her brain. She gave herself an at-home lobotomy.

She'll be back when she can find her front door again to let in the pizza pizza guy.....
 
There is something about the way she holds chopsticks that makes me so annoyed, bitch just stop. You have no idea how to use chopsticks with them swollen giant trotters. Toddler would do a better job.
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You got it right without connecting the dots. She can't hold chopsticks correctly because her hands are so fat that she has the motor skills of an overgrown toddler.
But of course chinderella has to use chopsticks when she eats asian food to show us how well cultured she is and not some obese shut in.
 
Chinny was carrying a caesar to her little corner of muckbang hell when she tripped and fell. The Extreme Bean garnish jammed straight up her nose and twirled her brain. She gave herself an at-home lobotomy.

She'll be back when she can find her front door again to let in the pizza pizza guy.....

It was most definitely a virgin caesar because Chantal loves to point out at every opportunity that she doesn't drink.
She hasn't drank in a year!
(And also that she is NOT a virgin even though she prefers virgin drinks). WTF?

Has anyone else ever noticed this? Like who gives a fuck and who even asked, Chantal? It might be to offset her gluttony for food. "At least I'm not an alcoholic (like my dad was)!" Ummm, ok. Good for you. But you have WAY bigger problems.
 
There is something about the way she holds chopsticks that makes me so annoyed, bitch just stop. You have no idea how to use chopsticks with them swollen giant trotters. Toddler would do a better job.
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You got it right without connecting the dots. She can't hold chopsticks correctly because her hands are so fat that she has the motor skills of an overgrown toddler.
But of course chinderella has to use chopsticks when she eats asian food to show us how well cultured she is and not some obese shut in.
You guys. She holds chopsticks like shes holding two pencils together in the same hand between the same fingers. Its physically impossible to work, hence why shes having such a hard time. She almost had it down in one of her videos that she had done a few minutes of 'research' in, but quickly gave up and just started eating with the plastic cutlery the restaurant had provided in the bag. Shes also used the odd technique of shoving her fat finger between the sticks to get that leverage that a child needs when using those cheat chopsticks you get when out at your local oriental place. No matter how hard she tries, she just doesnt have the patience it requires to eat with them in the end, and ultimately trades them in for something more shovel like.
 
Unfortunately I don’t think so but maybe there is a fellow kiwi who has an ace in its sleeve and will pull it out for us!

@Smutley has it. It's called "unsolved mystery of dave bocks" and was posted April 3rd 2018

I went back to the time it was posted to see if anyone put a video in thread, but it seems at that point everyone was linking directly to her account. ALWAYS ARCHIVE. And don't use Giphy or Imgur, cause even their dog is fat.
 
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Bruh, is that soy sauce in a tea cup? That's a lot of sodium! Just looking at that gives me hypertension.


Again with her ahegao onryo style face... Oh god I can't believe I called her an onryo with an ahegao face. Just imagine a big fat Canadian onryo crawling out of your computer or TV after it detected that you have food in your hands as it tries to wrestle them off of you. If only fat onryos can get stuck from trying to get out of the screens but no screen is too big or small for them I suppose.

Also, it looks like her FUPA is finally weighing her down and what the hell is that swing made of to not collapse under her weight like that?

Poor cow! It thought Chantal was it's mom but I doubt it's getting any milk from her.
 
Brilliant job, Strine. I know it took a lot of time and effort (the writing of the OP lasted longer than any of her diet/lifestyle changes), and I am pretty sure I can speak for everyone when I say how grateful we are.

Our Clotso is a very special cow at the 'farms. Not only is she deserving of the best possible bio in the OP, but her OP deserves to be good enough to be a blueprint for other OPs. You succeeded on both counts; the OP is truly worthy of its immense subject. A+

Now, if only our heroine could be bothered to update the subscribers she adores so much...
 
I've been searching French dictionaries for where the root word "beezin" comes from, but with no success. I know it is an intentional misspelling of the French verb but I forget which one. I remember it being posted earlier in this mega thread. I think it would be a great addition to the OP! But other than that, the OP is fantastic!!!
Literally the only one I can think of is 'besoin' which essentially means 'need' in english. Maybe she's saying he needs attention???
 
Literally the only one I can think of is 'besoin' which essentially means 'need' in english. Maybe she's saying he needs attention???

She's asked this a lot on live streams and Q&A videos. It's just a term she made up and it means when a cat is acting up as they do, usually in the middle of the night when they chase shit that isn't there, as she says "I dunno, like getting into mischief". Some people call it "the zoomies" when their pets do this.
 
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She's asked this a lot on live streams and Q&A videos. It's just a term she made up and it means when a cat is acting up as they do, usually in the middle of the night when they chase shit that isn't there, as she says "I dunno, like getting into mischief". Some people call it "the zoomies" when their pet do this.
I used to call it the midnight trots or the 3 AM constitutional. I should have known better than to think she actually knew any french.
 
The small kisses that the French like to give is called a "bise", pronounced "beez". So maybe what it means "to be beezin'" is to go out and be social, meeting lots of people, etc... However we all know Chantal's French is atrocious and it's probably just a mere coincidence.

Chantal's family looks like your typical lower classed frenchie. The French have been historically poorer than the English in the Ottawa area. The poorest neighbourhood in Ottawa is Vanier, a French part of town. In modern times there's no more French/English divide in the city, in fact French speakers may be on average better off since Trudeau Sr made the Federal Government fully bilingual in the 70s.

It's why she probably got hired as the admin assistant, purely based on her very French name. Then I guess they found out she didn't actually speak any French and by that time it may have been too late to fire her.
 
The small kisses that the French like to give is called a "bise", pronounced "beez". So maybe what it means "to be beezin'" is to go out and be social, meeting lots of people, etc... However we all know Chantal's French is atrocious and it's probably just a mere coincidence.

Chantal's family looks like your typical lower classed frenchie. The French have been historically poorer than the English in the Ottawa area. The poorest neighbourhood in Ottawa is Vanier, a French part of town. In modern times there's no more French/English divide in the city, in fact French speakers may be on average better off since Trudeau Sr made the Federal Government fully bilingual in the 70s.

It's why she probably got hired as the admin assistant, purely based on her very French name. Then I guess they found out she didn't actually speak any French and by that time it may have been too late to fire her.
From what I remember she got hired to the schizo ward admin position despite the fact they knew her French was atrocious and she bombed the interview. Someone in the office let slip that nobody else had applied for the job I think. And then she transferred within the company to work for the "mean" doctor that ended up canning her. From what I gather, the doctor didn't like her because she expected Chantal to not be a lazy, incompetent re.tard on the job but that was too much to ask, so Chantal rebelled by putting out even shittier work and not showing up for her shifts.

Chantal's Facebook was mentioned the other day so I took a peek. Autism incoming in the spoiler.
I enjoyed this one where she went overboard with the editing but actually used it as her profile pic anyway.

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She has like five photos of her and Bibi actually looking friendly from way back (2012 or earlier) when, I guess, they first started dating or whatever it is they're doing. She's been posting these same sad few pics intermittently from 2012 to now.
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Came across this on FB too. Buster doesn't look too bothered.
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Rina had shared this on her wall back in 2018. Did Sham actually manage to escape once?
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From what I remember she got hired to the schizo ward admin position despite the fact they knew her French was atrocious and she bombed the interview. Someone in the office let slip that nobody else had applied for the job I think. And then she transferred within the company to work for the "mean" doctor that ended up canning her. From what I gather, the doctor didn't like her because she expected Chantal to not be a lazy, incompetent re.tard on the job but that was too much to ask, so Chantal rebelled by putting out even shittier work and not showing up for her shifts.

Chantal's Facebook was mentioned the other day so I took a peek. Autism incoming in the spoiler.
I enjoyed this one where she went overboard with the editing but actually used it as her profile pic anyway.

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She has like five photos of her and Bibi actually looking friendly from way back (2012 or earlier) when, I guess, they first started dating or whatever it is they're doing. She's been posting these same sad few pics intermittently from 2012 to now.
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Came across this on FB too. Buster doesn't look too bothered.
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Rina had shared this on her wall back in 2018. Did Sham actually manage to escape once?
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I'm gonna say no... Sham has a black dot on his left eye at his tear duct, gray spots on both forelegs and has longer hair.

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Alright. Forgive the large text, but I want all the old hands to see and read this.
Spoilered below is the final draft of the new OP.
In around 24 hours, assuming I have made no glaring omissions, I will have it implemented as the OP. If I have forgotten something crucial (and I mean crucial; it is already very long) then let me know before then. I will touch up the formatting for clarity a bit, but it will otherwise be as-is.
Thanks to everybody who helped out on this; you will be credited when it's submitted.
Now, gorls and guys of the thread...


Chantal Herself

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Our Foodie Beauty.

Chantal Olive Marie Sarault, born March 28th 1984, aliases Foodie Beauty, Big Beautiful Me, Chantal Marie and others, is a Canadian YouTuber, whose channel was created in 2014. Although she was initially an attempted beauty channel, Chantal made an ostensible name for herself eating disgustingly large amounts of fast food in one sitting, usually while sitting alone in her car in an empty parking lot. Due to Chantal's paranoia of being seen stuffing her face by some unsuspecting citizen, her eyes dart from left to right at a rapid pace, earning her something of a reputation as "that fat girl with the shifty eyes" from the uninitiated. This nervous mania has yet to deter her from consuming massive amounts of food in a public setting. Her gluttony and foolishness have earned her the sobriquet "the Canadian Amberlynn Reid".

Although at first blush she seems like a typical white trash fattie, Chantal is notable for her legitimately manic attempts to cultivate and control a glamorous image of herself as an attractive woman who is losing weight. In turn, she sabotages this confected persona by lying about diets, often while visibly gaining weight, and frequently succumbing to a seemingly pathological need to relate anecdotes about her losing bowel control or having sex with homeless men. Chantal has claimed to be the same weight for several years, despite visibly having gained a substantial amount of weight over this period. It is thus unknown what her real weight is; only that she's lying about it.
This is not the only thing Chantal hasn't been honest about. Chantal has historically lied constantly, unconvincingly and pointlessly about matters ranging from trivial to grave. Just about anything she says, particularly about her health or success, is unlikely to be consistent between (or sometimes even within) her videos. Whether her inability to stick to a story can (charitably) be chalked up to poor memory or general witlessness is not clear, as she has showcased both qualities countless times, but she is usually taken to be trying to control the narrative.

Ever since an event in late 2018 (more on that later), Chantal's dishonesty has become so extensive and so wildly inconsistent in narrative that it has made it difficult for her followers to discern what, or even whether, events are transpiring in her life. Chantal will readily give many different accounts of a story which contradict both themselves and each other, and which were prima facie so implausible that they weren't believed anyway. This behaviour is steadily worsening along with Chantal's health, the two are seen to correlate; as Chantal packs on the pounds and drifts ever further from her slim and beautiful fantasy persona, she drifts also from reason and reality The departure of much of her sanity in late 2018, co-inciding with a content doldrum in the Amberlynn Reid subforum, caused her thread activity to increase dramatically with an influx of Kiwis looking for "delusional fat bitch" content jumping ship; her thread growth has sped up considerably since then.

The essential author of Chantal's misfortune is the fact that she can not, or will not, think beyond immediate gratification and getting exactly what she wants, whenever she wants it. These desires amount largely (as it were) to lying in bed, binge-eating, and obsessively monitoring her YouTube and Instagram comment sections - often all of the above at the same time. Although often compared to Queen Deathfat Amberlynn Reid, Chantal crucially differs in her total lack of self-awareness and her baleful refusal to countenance any criticism. Part of her entitlement/gratification psychology is an expectation that she not be held accountable for how she treats her "fanbase", even though, as outlined above, she constantly lies to them and breaks her promises.

These broken promises are generally to do with a diet. Chantal is much enamoured with the idea of being on a weight loss journey, and often fantasises aloud about her future fabulous and sexy body. What these diets actually amount to is perpetual narrative loop wherein Chantal will ostentatiously proclaim she's on a diet, make no effort to adhere to it, visibly gain weight (and often upload a mukbang of non-diet food with flimsy or no explanation) and then, when called out, react with furious anger in a conflagration of video deletion and self-righteous ranting, followed by a period of non-dieting before she begins again. This is referred to by Chantal's observers as "the cycle", as it is a pattern from which Chantal is never seen to deviate.

For reasons best known to herself, Chantal is especially fixated on the idea of being a vegan, and has made numerous attempts at the lifestyle. So far, none of these attempts have happened to involve giving up eating meat and cheese every day of the week, with one 2019 "vegan mukbang" consisting of literally eating chicken on camera, but Chantal explains that she's still a vegan because she feels bad for the animals. During her frequent “vegan” phases, Chantal browses cute livestock pics online and even physically visits farms and petting zoos, which she claims helps deter her from eating meat (it evidently does not). Her preoccupation with veganism is believed to stem from a desire to emulate thin, attractive social media influencers, which is in fact the impetus for most of her online behaviour.

Foodie Beauty, for so she calls herself, is very vain about her looks. Despite the adverse effects of hundreds of pounds of excess weight on her appearance, Chantal will apply huge amounts of makeup every day, often just to sit around indoors taking carefully angled and suspiciously cropped pictures of herself for Instagram. She is balding (there are several possible reasons why) and so also liberally applies black powder to her scalp to attempt to hide it. Although Chantal tried to start as a beauty channel, her makeup skills are mediocre at best and she often unknowingly wears makeup clearly intended either for costume parties or drag queens. Chantal is ordinarily never seen without heavy concealer on her face and therewhile actually pretends she isn't wearing makeup. However, in an early 2019 video, she made a video without any cosmetics applied for real, and her legitimately frightening appearance indicated that ordinarily she does her hair and makeup even for her regular 5am chimpout videos. The money for expensive makeup palettes, and various other frivolous purchases, is covered somewhat by her channel income, but Chantal culls money from her ostensible boyfriend Bibi and from her elderly grandmother to supplement her budget for useless garbage.

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Chinny in high resolution. She used this camera once, and then, mysteriously, never again.

Though incredibly vain, Chantal often relates disgusting anecdotes, many of which are obvious fiction, in her videos. These tales often feature sex with strange men, flatulence, loss of bowel control, menstruation, and combinations thereof. The reason for this behaviour is not apparent, with speculation ranging from paypig catering to severely rëtarded social development.

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Chantal also likes to think of herself as a gifted singer, and has uploaded numerous videos of song covers, where between gasping breaths she will warble the lyrics in a weak mezzo-soprano, with no regard for intonation, but clearly enjoying her diva fantasy a great deal.


Enjoy.







Chantal is a true misanthrope: she hates all men and all women, but for different reasons. Chantal's hatred of men is widely believed to stem from daddy issues, and the few men in Chantal's life she treats as props to evidence her (non-existent) sexual desirability. She often relates stories (that never happened) where men lust after her, but Chantal always gets the upper hand at the end by means of her self-assessed cleverness (à la Br'er Rabbit) and quite often also the aforementioned flatulence. Chantal wants men to be attracted to her, but sourly and broodingly resents that they never are. Chantal's hatred of other women, in a similar vein, stems mainly from envy of their superior desirability (and bewildered resentment of their ability to avoid becoming morbidly obese), which curves around again to her obsession with male attention. Chantal's delusions about men finding her sexy - fostered by her enablers - are the rubber bands keeping together the mass of vanities, vexations and vendettas that passes for her psyche.

Chantal is super morbidly obese, but despite her notion that her haters just want to make fun of her for her (falsely reported) weight, her sky-high BMI is symptomatic of her general dysfunction, and really quite incidental to her entertainment value. Rather, her appeal as a cow stems from her profound delusions, her nasty disposition, her thirst for male-given validation, and her deeply erroneous belief that she's smarter than everybody else — her idea that 100% of criticism is mere fattie-bashing only proves this point. Chantal has a thread here because she wishes to be perceived as a clever, attractive, successful and thin personality on the internet, and she's not going to let colossal obesity, narcissistic solipsism, subnormal reasoning skills, or complete estrangement from reality get in her way.


Education
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Chantal showcases her advanced English skills with her patented EAITING pyramid.


Chantal evidently finished high school and has completed a few units of a university degree in English, which she claims to have deferred, and has exhibited no intention to complete. Despite this dropout, she often touts it as evidence of her successful background, or as a viable alternative to her YouTube "career" in one of her regular internet exodus song-and-dances. She has been especially nebulous, even by her own formidable standards, when detailing her scholastic career, but her LinkedIn incoherently attempts to indicate that she was doing English Lit (undergrad and less than half-finished, but somehow "with honours") before she dropped out to focus on her current vocation of being an unemployable trainwreck. LinkedIn would also have us believe this degree was part-time, even though Chantal was doing nothing else with her life then as now.


Her interest in and acceptance to this university course comes as something of a surprise to many Kiwis, because little about Chantal suggests that she has literary interests. She is never seen to be reading, or to discuss books, and has admitted multiple times during post-fake-diet-meltdowns to never even having read the book the diet was supposedly based on. More broadly, Chantal's writing, grammar, vocabulary and general English skills are well below the standards of an adult. Her writing consists almost exclusively of tautological rants written in short, first- and second- person sentences, with plenty of elementary spelling and grammar mistakes but well under quota on punctuation and totally devoid of paragraph spacing. Chantal does not write about subjects other than herself. Her speech is much the same: she will attempt to convey something for a few sentences, then rephrase or frequently simply repeat those sentences until she believes a point has been made. It is broadly held that her university career was cut short because she was scholastically incompetent and characteristically lazy.

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Chantal's LinkedIn account of her tertiary education speaks volumes.



Chantal's People

  • Two cats — Sam and BebeJunes. Chantal blatantly prefers Sam (usually addressed as "SSHHHHAM") and is often heard to sing nonsense songs to him. While this is something people often do in private to pets and babies, Chantal frequently adopts an unsettling goblinoid voice to deliver the song, and has unabashedly uploaded many such ditties to YouTube, often with Sam being physically restrained from escaping.

  • Bibi — Malan, nicknamed Bibi by Chantal, is a Senegalese manlet sharing an apartment with Chantal. In what is surely a written-in-the-stars True Love coincidence, he contacted Chantal on plentyoffish.com around the time he needed to use a native Canadian for residency purposes. Chantal claims they began dating mid-2011 (at which time she was merely very obese instead of super morbidly obese, and was also a smoker) and professes to this day that they are a happy couple. Evidence that they are either happy or even a couple is very thin on the ground, with Bibi reluctant to appear on camera, very sullen when he does, and reluctant also to display affection. Bibi works full time, and whatever Chantal's lying tongue says of finances, it may reasonably be assumed that Bibi is the breadwinner and pays the majority of the expenses.
    Around October 2018, things with Bibi seemed to change. Chantal made mention of Bibi's "sister" entering the picture, who to this day has never been seen or even evidenced in Chantal's videos. Bibi went home to Senegal around this time for some weeks, and, apparently à propos of nothing, Chantal sold her car. To this day no Kiwi knows what really happened (though speculation abounds), but the events at this time triggered a psychological decline in Chantal that as of a calendar year later is showing no signs of stopping.

    One of the main developments of this event was that Chantal's dishonesty, though never in short supply in the past, became so profuse, and inconsistent of narrative, that almost nothing at all she says in videos after that point was or is taken for fact. It is widely believed that her relationship (such as it was) with Bibi was compromised or maligned in that incident, as he is perceived to have become yet more distant from that time, but due to the dishonesty described above, nobody can be sure what happened.

  • Sister (Natalie Landry) and mother (Kim Landry) — Chantal's sister Nat, whom she reputedly bullied in childhood, is a hobby power-lifter who lives with her boyfriend (N.B. this boyfriend is not an African midget who needed a green card). Nat is in good shape, and very physically attractive compared to Chantal. Chantal often claims this sister has a mental disability and belittles her, but no conclusive evidence has emerged of this being the case. Chantal's mother is Chantal 0.5, and is generally held responsible for cultivating Chantal's FUBAR psychology. She talks exactly like Chantal (awkwardly, disjointedly, and unsettlingly) and provided the Canuck white trash garden our noxious flower grew from. Her dog visibly loathes Chantal, and it's fucking funny.

  • Peetz — James, whom Chantal calls "Peetz" out of her proclivity for stupid nicknames, is Chantal's ex. Chantal cheated on Peetz with Bibi in 2011, but they have remained on apparently good terms. Peetz is a bald, fat social rëtard who spends all night chimping out online; he is in many respects a male version of Chantal - the animus to her anima. Like many effete, sexually frustrated gamma males, Peetz is a zealous SJW, and eagerly counsels Chantal about how her detractors are "ableist" and other buzzwords. Chantal is a little dim to wield this specious rhetoric, though, so it doesn't tend to stick. Peetz uses Chantal mainly for her car (naturally he's in his mid-30s and can't drive) to get to the soyboy comics shop. In return, Chantal cajoles him into featuring in her videos, mistakenly believing that their chemistry (fetid sexual tension and toe-curlingly awkward banter) will enhance viewer appeal.

  • Bibi's sister Gnima — little is known about this mysterious never-seen-on-camera figure, but Gnima was first mentioned in October 2018 (see below) in strange videos where Chantal seemed upset. Chantal gave wildly inconsistent reports of whether or not Gnima was staying with them, and when Gnima arrived on the scene, Chantal inexplicably sold her car (then bought another one shortly afterwards).




Chantal and Health

The Weight Loss Journey

Between "I'm fat and beautiful" and "DFE chimpout" phases, Chantal is usually claiming to be on some kind of diet. She has "tried" seemingly everything to lose weight, except for counting calories, or eating fewer calories than she expends. At her weight, which is 400+ pounds, her basal metabolic rate is stratospheric, but even still, she's never been physically seen to become any thinner. These diet song-and-dances frequently consist partially or entirely of a conversion to veganism, which thus far has never precluded the consumption of colossal amounts of meat and dairy.

In such phases as these, Chantal often makes a show of weighing herself, ostensibly to examine the progress on her diet of the week, but an ulterior motive of “proving” her weight hasn’t increased may be safely assumed. These weigh-in sequences always involve her old bathroom scales and, unlike anything else she uploads, are heavily edited. Her scales do indeed claim she’s remained around 370lbs for the entire duration of her YouTube career. However, for a variety of reasons, these reports are simply not believed:
  • The scales are not deathfat-strength; they thus have a weight limit and are prone to malfunction if that limit is reached
  • She has referred to them as being “broken”
  • It’s possible simply to dub new audio over footage from months or years ago
  • It’s possible to cheat scales by displacing weight
  • Her frequent medical episodes would involve hospital weigh-ins, which we never seem to hear details of
  • Most damningly, Chantal has visibly gained substantial weight (in the order of 50 pounds or more) over time, but continues to deny any weight gain, even while sizing out of new clothes in a few months

For these reasons, her stated weight figures are simply dismissed out of hand. It’s hard to be sure, since she was massively obese to begin with, but the general estimate of her weight is between 420-460lbs. If she were simply honest about her weight gain, the “bullies” wouldn’t have any fuel for their fire, but Chantal and honesty are strange bedfellows.

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Chantal bereft of cosmetics; her diet expertise is manifest in her obvious good health and lustrous hair.

The Cycle

Chantal is constantly rotating between a fake diet narrative and a defiant “fuck the haters” gluttony episode, in what is referred to in shorthand as “the cycle”. Which mode she is in has no bearing on what she's actually eating off-camera, but the episodic fake diets occur whenever Chantal wants to feel skinny and be praised online, which as it turns out is very often. The cycle is therefore almost always in motion.

"The cycle" is as follows: a new diet is heralded with a smug announcement video, usually containing fantasies about her inevitable skinny legend lifestyle and a slew of pie-crust promises not to eat pie crusts. Chantal enjoys the praise and the fantasy for a few days, then, when she realises she's expected to actually lose weight by dieting, she goes silent for a while (often citing "personal problems" or an unsubstantiated illness), then comes back visibly fatter post-binge with a hand-wave ten-second explanation about how diet #1838625 didn't work for her. This may (and often does) co-incide with a chimpout about how the people politely asking about her diet are "bullies", and will end with either minced words about continuing on the diet if Chantal can somehow find the time and energy in her busy life of eating and sleeping all day, or else a false bravado where Chantal claims she's going to do what she wants, at which point she enters dormancy until the cycle begins again.

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Chantal the Munchie

Chantal is a frequent guest at medical facilities in her area, with Canada’s basic healthcare being socialised and therefore costing her nothing. Often, after chimping out at the late stage in the cycle, she'll claim she’s stricken with an illness and too “sick” to be on YouTube for a while - usually a few days, after which she assumes everyone will have forgotten about her ludicrous behaviour. This is never the case, but her thirst for compliments and validation always drives her back to video-making all the same. Fortunately for Chantal, she has never been so debilitatingly unwell that that she was unable to find the time to stay up all night moderating her comment section and following pages on Instagram.

Although not a munchie on the same level as some others in the Beauty Parlour, Chantal consistently plays up her make-believe maladies for attention and pity, and essentially considers herself morally infallible and unculpable for past actions if she’s feeling unwell - or claiming to feel unwell.


Cyster Act

Chantal has alluded many times to being afflicted with ovarian cysts, which interfere with many hormonal processes and may prevent conception and pregnancy. Naturally, no definitive medical evidence has emerged of this being true, but at any rate, in mid-2019, Chantal announced she was having a hysterectomy. Since this was post-Octobergate, the details of the surgery and her general medical state changed from day to day, as an almost-psychotic Chantal couldn’t decide which narrative she liked best. She uploaded many mukbang videos in the lead-in to the surgery date, ingesting huge amounts of food and making scant reference to her upcoming procedure. She was perceived to be an extremely risky candidate for surgery, due to her copious abdominal fat and the elevated risk of death under general anaesthesia. At the beginning of October, the scheduled surgery date, Chantal uploaded a brief video in a hospital gown announcing the surgery was “postponed”, and then spent the rest of the video talking about eating at Red Lobster.

Eventually, in late November, some kind of surgery went ahead. Details of the procedure remain nebulous, but Chantal came back from the surgery with a mania never before seen. She began ostentatiously farting mid-video, creating and deleting content multiple times a day, and gorging on food despite her ill health.



Chantal's Online Presence

Chantal will not tolerate any criticism, real or imagined, polite or pointed, on her videos, IG posts, or occasional Twitter episodes. Sometimes she attempts to censure or scold the commentors with her notion of a witty retort, but more often she will delete the comments or simply disable them altogether. During a post-meltdown denouement, she will often claim she is far too sick or too busy to make a quick video, and then be seen to stay up until 5am deleting comments on her channel. She will also delete any past video she doesn't wish people to see, most commonly her 5am chimpout specials (see below). She also doesn't hesitate to strike "bully" channels who mock her, although there is simply too great a volume for her to meaningfully combat it.

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Her video content, such as it is, is most usually boring videos of Chantal telling a (made-up) story and stuffing her face, or else very dull "adventure" videos wherein she cajoles Peetz into joining her for a banal expedition to an uninteresting location. Sometimes, however, Chantal is roused to ire by people holding her culpable for her promises and calling her a liar (or variations on this theme) and will upload a rant video, often in the wee hours of the morning (her time). In these videos, she is always effulgent with self-righteousness, and tautologically shames her detractors before usually claiming she's quitting the internet forever (and inevitably comes back within a day). If you ever see a video like this, archive it at once as she has been known to delete them within minutes.

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Many glamorous moments have been captured with Peetz behind the camera.

Chantal's channel supporters consist of preening sycophants who support and enable her unhealthy habits. She also had for some time a fat fetishist stalker from Applevalley, California named "Jeremy Hoyles" who commented on every single video, but as of 2019 her primary suitor is one KarateJoe, who is often to be seen beneath her videos attempting to excoriate the snide wisecrackers in the comments, in the shooting-star grace period between Chantal uploading the video and Chantal purging any comment that isn't unadulterated and unqualified praise.


The rest of her views are from hatewatchers, fat fetishists, and other middle-aged frumps who are beguiled by her weight loss deceptions and usually scold her and unsubscribe after a while when they realise what's happening.

Online Drama

As with her sister cow Amberlynn Reid, Chantal is often the subject of
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unflattering drama videos, from the same sources - Zachary Michael (AKA Zack), Michael Lawrence (AKA Beetus Drake) and a slew of others. She has even feuded with ALR, after vainly assuming a characteristically vague tweet from Amber was directed at her; Chantal was on the defensive as she had to trick her audience and lied about feeding a homeless man — see right for the video.











Chantal Lies

One of the most commonly repeated phrases in this thread is 'Chantal lies'. Chantal lies about anything and everything, usually in order to create a narrative that directly or indirectly flatters herself. However, Chantal isn't very bright, and either doesn't or can't remember previous versions of a given story, and so the details tend to change with every telling as she comes up with revised versions that she likes more. Chantal expects every word she says to be believed, whether or not they contradict things she has stated prior. When she inevitably isn’t believed, she unfailingly reacts with astonished fury. Although Chantal isn't honest about anything, her deceit is most greatly concentrated around a few subjects: her health, her relationship with Bibi, and her diets.

They say you never step into the same river twice, and that is certainly the case for a Chantal narrative. Her constant-yet-inconsistent lying about everything means that it's often difficult or even impossible to discern what is actually happening. While an enthusiastic liar, Chantal is not a very skilled one, and frequently there is simply no version of a story that has any plausibility whatsoever. Although Chantal always fails to deceive her viewers per se, she will often succeed in hiding some of the truth, as nobody knows what's a lie and what isn't.


Chantal's Tics

In addition to her manic eye movements, which have furnished many a Kiwi with a display pic, Chantal has a variety of bizarre tics for reasons unknown. They appear most frequently when she's eating, but permeate all of her speech.
"HEE HEE!" - sometimes known as "the cackle", this witchy ejaculation is sometimes used to punctuate something Chantal believes is funny, but is often heard for no apparent reason.
"Ha!" - (same as above)
"SHH! I said SHH! - often delivered with great force, always while eating, and generally when alone. Some kiwis think she's shushing a chiding voice in her head who tells her she's eating herself to death. As of late 2019, she has been faking this tic in videos, for reasons unknown.
"SHAM!" - This is what she calls her cat, Sam. It is generally delivered in a demonic contralto.
"Beezin' " - No one knows exactly what this means, but it is a staple of her vernacular. Sam often finds himself accused of beezing, and despite the negative connotations, Chantal claims he has "VIP status" at "The Beezoire".


Before You Post...

New to Chantal?
  • Do not post long, tiresome posts about your own weight loss or eating/exercise habits. This thread is not about you, and nobody here cares. If you feel the need to enumerate reasons you are superior to Chantal, there are probably very few to tally.
  • Don’t make posts giving Chantal advice. Chantal does read this thread, but she keeps no counsel but her own, and the purpose of this thread is not to help her. We’re not here to save lives. We’re here to mock the people who can’t be bothered to save their own.
  • Don’t write spiels directed to Chantal about how much you think she sucks. If you have an insight about her cow behaviour, by all means post it, but harangueing her in this thread is a waste of everybody’s time.
  • When someone comes in here being a powerleveling douche, or trying to start fights, report them! Slapfights do nothing but get your posts deleted, and possibly get you threadbanned.
  • Bear always in mind that no information that Chantal presents, in any medium, textually, verbally or visually, should be believed until she proves it (which she uncoincidentally never does). When thread veterans say "Chantal lies", they don't mean she lies occasionally or even often, they mean she lies so profusely that literally nothing she does or could say, except maybe "I'm a fat lunatic", should be taken for the truth.
  • As with any thread, the wisest thing to do before posting is to read, read, read. Get an idea of the tone and culture of the thread if you wish to usefully participate and receive a warm welcome.
Well done. It captures the Chantalness of our favourite behemoth very well. Odds are, Chantal is reading this from her bed, crying into a McDonald's family meal, planning a post on bullies that she will post in her community tab on YouTube for all of 3 hours, only to then post some sanctimonious body positivity quote on Instagram. I can practically hear her suite being readied at the psych emerge.
 
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