Containment What If?

What if Mary Lee Walsh wrote Chris a sincere apology letter for her "wrongful trollings against his true and honest love quest"?
 
What if Mary Lee Walsh wrote Chris a sincere apology letter for her "wrongful trollings against his true and honest love quest"?

Chris would think it's a troll effort.
 
What if Chris was frozen for about 10,000 years and was uncovered. Would they treat him as an artifat and accurate representation of Man in the 21st century or would they identify him as being an outlier of the time? If they were to comb through digital fossils of the ancient internet systems would they find the CWCki and consider Chis to be a world leader and not understand a lot of what was in it is fabrication and embellishment for humor sake? Would the blandness of the highly logical future be offset by Chris' insanity, thus making Chris a popular entertainment figure and an icon for the people of 12015?
 
What if Chris was frozen for about 10,000 years and was uncovered. Would they treat him as an artifat and accurate representation of Man in the 21st century or would they identify him as being an outlier of the time? If they were to comb through digital fossils of the ancient internet systems would they find the CWCki and consider Chis to be a world leader and not understand a lot of what was in it is fabrication and embellishment for humor sake? Would the blandness of the highly logical future be offset by Chris' insanity, thus making Chris a popular entertainment figure and an icon for the people of 12015?

Chris would shit himself and do nothing
 
What if Chris gets a call from a troll right before he goes into the court room and with the shout of "JULLAYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Chris explodes into a coprophilic ejaculation. Would he wander into the court room and scream at the judge "I CANNOT STAND TRIAL TODAY! I HAVE NUMBERS OF DIRTY, RAPED BRIEFS!"
 
What if Chris bombed a Gamestop?

Je Suis Sonic Boom. Everyone wears blue sleeves in remembrance to the lives lost and as a huge middle finger to this lolcow. Will he be awarded his 72 virgins with rage? I don't know.

I don't remember if this was answered, but what if Chris was actually good at art.
 
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What if Chris met Harry and Lloyd?

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