I made it through about 15 minutes of Clotso's livestream before tapping out from the shrill cat voices and the overwhelming excitement of watching her sit in a chair and
take groceries out of bags.
Some of the highlights:
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- Chantal sits on her ass, preens herself in the viewfinder and giggles, greeting everyone in the chat as Bibi lugs in all the groceries
- She informs us she went with Peetz to stock up on groceries because she "
hates to go by herself and Bibi was asleep"
- She's super pissed because all the selfish people bought up all the meat
she wanted and there was NONE left for her except for sausages and chicken wings. She ended up having to buy a bunch of crap like Cheeze-Its and ramen (oh, and Easter chocolates), because otherwise our dainty damsel would starve!
- Mentioned that all the organic frozen fruits/veggies were still available because they're expensive, but
since she's "rich", she bought a bunch of frozen berries to fill her freezer with. Smug smoothie Insta pics are on the horizon!
- Giddily mentions the Cheeze-Its again, Jesus she's really excited about these crackers. "Jokes" that the pandemic and resulting grocery store supply issues are a "good excuse" to eat junk food.
- "
You bought too much stuff", Bibi laments as he hands over yet another bag he lugged from the car to our Queen of Poutine, right before she smugly lectures her audience that "
people need to STOP hoarding!"
- Sadly for Chantal (and even moreso for poor Bibi, who has to live with this diarrhea-monster who refuses to curtail her cheese-eating) the store was out of toilet paper.
- Dr. Chantal informs us she is "not scared" of the coronavirus. She'll be ok, she
takes vitamins, guys! She eats healthy outside of her mukbangs! She has "
a breather thing for her breathing"! Plus according to what she read, Covid-19 is in the same group of viruses as a cold, so she's not worried. People die of the flu every year and "nobody closes the stores for that"!
She admits that she has
some health issues, but she
had the flu, guys
, and recovered from that, so "
gimme a breeeaak" she sassily sighs.
What she IS concerned about is not being able to get the meat she wanted (and
ALL THE
PASTA WAS
GONE!!), so she's going back when they've restocked.
- Sadly, she has decided to cancel her upcoming trip to America's finest eating establishments
- Bitches again about Lush closing:
"
I know there's been people who have died and that's horrible... It's just kind of like scary when everything's like, I've never like, I guess like, it's just like, everything's closing it's just so weird so... But ummm."
- "I mean I don't MIND staying in..." says the shut-in who literally only leaves the safety of her cockroach- filled hovel to procure food and go to the ER for cheese-emergencies.
- Our selfless, humble philanthropist claims she gave an old man (who "
smelled like booze" because what is a Chantal story without an unnecessary, insulting detail) at McDonald's $4 to pay for parking, who then told her "
you still got it!". She interpreted this to mean "
you're still pretty, even though you're fat". I interpret it as "
this never happened".