Off-Topic Death Fat Death Pool - The Kentucky Fried Derby

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Death Fat Death Pool

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tiggles

tiggles

kiwifarms.net
Joined
Sep 12, 2019
Everybody dies. Fat people die faster. Let's speculate on who will win the race to the great kiwi farm in the sky:

Notable fats and their comorbidities:
Last updated: July 18, 2020

Amberlynn Reid - Age 29 - DOB Dec 27, 1990
  • Highest Claimed Weight: 572 lbs
  • Highest Suspected Weight: possibly 600+ lbs in 2019
  • Current Claimed Weight: 488 lbs (June 2020)
  • Amberlynn has acanthosis nigricans (beetus knuckles), frequent UTIs but never finishes her meds, and at one point was very near or possibly broke 600 lbs.
  • amber has cancer
  • Uterus count: 0/1
Chantal Sarault / Foodie Beauty - Age 36 - DOB March 28th 1984
  • Highest Claimed Weight: 399 lbs
  • Current Claimed Weight: 399 lbs on a scale that only goes up to 400 lmao
  • Current Suspected Weight: 420-460 lbs
  • Flobby bobby is so damaged on the inside that she had her galbladder and uterus removed on separate occasions, and also has suffered from blood clots.
  • Chantal has the ‘beetus
  • Uterus count 0/1
Amy Ramadan / Amy's Life Journey - Age 38 - DOB August 27, 1981
  • Highest Claimed Weight: 535 lbs
  • Current Claimed Weight: 480 lbs (March 2020)
  • Current Suspected Weight: 500+ lbs
  • Amy is filthy, huge, and has “light” beetus in addition to 3 young pitri dishes living in her care and shitting in her van.
Jen Armstrong / Life by Jen - Age 44 - DOB October 26, 1975
  • Highest Weight: 700+ lbs
  • Current Weight: 540 lbs (March 2020)
  • Jen lives in assisted living with her new alcoholic enabler, and hit 700+ lbs at one point while under the care of her previous enabler, her mother.
Tammy Slaton / The (fatter) Slaton Sister - Age 31 - DOB July 27, 1988
  • Highest Weight: ~~605 lbs~~ lol 644 lbs (Jan 2021)
  • Current Weight 644lbs
  • Tammy was previously hospitalized and nearly died from pneumonia.
  • Tammy caught Covid and also got pneumonia again but she fucking LIVED (rip team tam tam)
Anna O'Brien / Glitter and Lazers - Age 35 - DOB October 29, 1984
  • Suspected weight: 400+ lbs
  • Anna's mother and sister both died tragically young from fat-related things. Anna also travels frequently and doesn't wash her hands before picking at her face as evidenced by the nasty sores that never heal.
Sara Potter / Simply Sara - Age 40 - DOB July 02 1979
  • Suspected Weight: 500 lbs
  • Sara was also previously hospitalized and nearly died from pneumonia; she can barely breathe anyway, you can hear her gasping for air every three words.

Personally I think one of them is going to get taken out by coronavirus. Lets go team wu flu!

I cut down a few honorable mentions (Tess, Jude) because the list is damn long, but I can put them back in if there's demand. Weights will be updated only for 20+ lb fluctiations.
 
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I said Amy Islamadon for these reasons:
  • Super unhygienic
  • Doesn’t seem to ever clean
  • Probably bathes once a week, if not less
  • Was said to be in contact with someone that had the Chinese virus
  • Stupid enough to forget social distancing
  • Due to being a fatty, she’ll go to the grocery store way more than others, leaving her more prone to get infected from others (she seems to like Costco, and I imagine that place is more crowded than usual)
  • Already has these pre-existing conditions
    • Diabetes
    • HBP (someone her weight without it would be a rarity)
    • Sleep apnea (surprised if she didn’t)
    • Chronic stupidity (not an official diagnosis, but her thread demonstrates she does indeed have it)
 
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JambledUpWords said:
I said Amy Islamadon for these reasons:
  • Super unhygienic
  • Doesn’t seem to ever clean
  • Probably bathes once a week, if not less
  • Was said to be in contact with someone that had the Chinese virus
  • Stupid enough to forget social distancing
  • Due to being a fatty, she’ll go to the grocery store way more than others, leaving her more prone to get infected from others (she seems to like Costco, and I imagine that place is more crowded than usual)
  • Already has these pre-existing conditions
    • Diabetes
    • HBP (someone her weight without it would be a rarity)
    • Sleep apnea (surprised if she didn’t)
    • Chronic stupidity (not an official diagnosis, but her thread demonstrates she does indeed have it)
Click to expand...

seriously debated including Amy being really god damn dumb as a comorbidity but I was worried it would spin the thread into a “who is the dumbest” debate. I vote Tard Tammy.
 
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Chinny for sure..she already has so much wrong with her, is also filthy, and is completely fucked up mentally. Need for fast food trumps everything else in her life and she'd lick an infected homeless person if it meant getting the last Whopper in Canada....

EDIT: "Nashie", not Whopper, Nashie
edit added 9/22/21
 
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I voted TamTam just because I think she's the most legitimately vulnerable. Sadly, there won't be a giant coffin grift now that they're rolling in TLC money.

People have been socially distancing from Fat Amy for decades. She claims Ali catches everything, and if she could install her sleeping chair at Costco, she would live there. She's definitely an odds on favorite.

Here's to Jen being the first to go six tits up in West Virginia:drink:
 
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I voted Anna because she went to Milan Fashion Week and there's some preliminary evidence that repeated exposure to the virus not only makes it more likely to contract the disease, but also might increase its severity. I'm sure her assistant and SIL are also not practicing social distancing and are bringing all their fun germs to Anna's place as well.


Edit: Anna has the luck of thr Irish or some shit. It's baffling. I'm now betting Chantel because I can't imagine her system can handle cocaine for long.
 
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WeDon'tNeedToWhisper said:
Your deadpool thread is in off-topic and it's not for deathfats only, like this one. So........
Click to expand...
It's in "Happenings" because deaths are indeed a happening. it includes celebs + all cows, deathfats included. If the mods want two, sure, but i wouldn't be surprised if these two get merged. Free country though ofc.

Doesn't seem like there's any need for a deadpool for every forum, when there's already one that covers them all. Just my 2c, dont see anything wrong with discussion pertaining to that.
 
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