Wuhan Coronavirus: Megathread - Got too big

[Jump]

Biden is held up in his home doing god knows what.

Biden did a livestream. It went pretty much as expected.

jordan on Twitter

“In a bizarre, meandering livestream put on by Joe Biden's campaign today, he forgets what year it is and when, if he doesn't lose, he would be in office. At another point, he seemingly forgets he's on a live stream and walks out of frame. The feed cuts away to a logo instead...

twitter.com

archive

 

[Lord of the Large Pants]

I dunno, instead of giving and extra $600 million to the arts above what we already do, why not just give a million of the poorest unemployed another $600?




This is the hottest, spiciest, most exceptional of takes and I love every second of it. Just perfect.

I looked up this guy's channel, and it's apparently satire.

... but I REALLY wasn't sure at first.

 

[dopy]

WHAT DID SHE MEAN BY THIS

(link) (a)

unironically gets the noggin joggin. no idea what this bitch meant by this.

 

[PS1gamenwatch]

WHAT DID SHE MEAN BY THIS

View attachment 1200536 (link) (a)

unironically gets the noggin joggin. no idea what this bitch meant by this.

US...A? The US?

 

[Drain Todger]

Or, if you really MUST HAVE YOUR QUININE just buy some good tonic water, and mix yourself a delicious gin and tonic.

Or just have that shit straight. A lot easier than measuring weird substances, and has the plus side of not killing you.

I love me a vodka and tonic every now and then. I also like having Fever-Tree straight from the bottle because it's fucking tasty. Sadly, there isn't enough quinine in most modern "tonic water" for it to be therapeutic. It's limited to 83mg per liter and below. You'd literally need to drink a gallon of straight tonic water to have a low-level therapeutic dose.

"B-But Trump never specifically SAID not to take aquarium cleaner as medicine! AHA! checkmate alt-exceptional individuals!" *drinks aquarium cleaner* "aaargh...fuck you drumpf"

Chloroquine phosphate aquarium treatment is like 99% pure chloroquine phosphate and is usually perfectly safe for human consumption, provided it hasn't been adulterated with anything by a shady-ass manufacturer. Anything that's 98% pure, you should be very worried about what the other 2% is.

Also, one should avoid doing what that Arizona couple did. They failed to measure the dose. They promptly ODed and one of them died. It doesn't take much chloroquine to kill somebody. One or two grams will do it. Did they have an electronic drug scale and a teeny little scoop to measure out the loose powder? No? Then they fucking ODed.

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

WHAT DID SHE MEAN BY THIS

View attachment 1200536 (link) (a)

unironically gets the noggin joggin. no idea what this bitch meant by this.

She's trying to say pretentious.

 

[dopy]

US...A? The US?

judging by other celebrities singing "imagine" as their response to the virus, crying about being locked in their million-dollar mansions a la ellen degeneres, and madonna being naked in a bathtub, i highly doubt that it has anything to do outside of pure narcissism/virtue signaling

 

[StarkRavingMad]

WHAT DID SHE MEAN BY THIS

View attachment 1200536 (link) (a)

unironically gets the noggin joggin. no idea what this bitch meant by this.

Probably some hippie feel-good message about coming together in a time of global crisis.

Sia ain't a bad chick, though. I think she's being sincere instead of being ... You know ... A celebrity. She's been doing this kind of thing for years, and someone finally "caught" her doing it this past Thanksgiving:

So yeah. Sia's pretty cool in my book.

 

[Kacho]

Well... hope you are all doing well. Let's take a minor left turn to irreverence. I had a surreal moment today thanks to this thread.

Someone posted something about Joe Biden and my brain smashed the brake pedal to the floor: "Holy shit I completely forgot there was an election happening."

Is that still happening? Are these guys campaigning? What the fuck are those poor schmucks Biden and Sanders doing right now while their opponent is doing daily press conferences?

Biden is just gone. A ghost. They're hiding him more completely than they hid Hillary after she started coughing and passing out.

 

[XYZpdq]

New York City officials publish coronavirus pandemic sex safety guide

The NYC Health issued a two-page memo Saturday listing its advice on how people can enjoy a - literally - healthy sex life while still protecting themselves from being infected with coronavirus.

www.dailymail.co.uk

View attachment 1200344

"Do not eat the booty like groceries." - New York City government

EAT DA POO POO

 

[Jump]

Hillary after she started coughing and passing out.

What if Hillary is the WuFlu patient zero?

 

[⠠⠠⠅⠑⠋⠋⠁⠇⠎ ⠠⠠⠊⠎ ⠠⠠⠁ ⠠⠠⠋⠁⠛]

Biden did a livestream. It went pretty much as expected.
View attachment 1200532

jordan on Twitter

“In a bizarre, meandering livestream put on by Joe Biden's campaign today, he forgets what year it is and when, if he doesn't lose, he would be in office. At another point, he seemingly forgets he's on a live stream and walks out of frame. The feed cuts away to a logo instead...

twitter.com

archive

That's actually from a couple weeks ago. He's been trying to avoid any appearances but did do a livestream from the basement of his son's mother in the last couple days where he just reads a prepared speech badly.

Joe Biden Outlines His Pandemic Plan In Basement Broadcast

“Trump keeps saying he’s a wartime president,” Joe Biden said. “Start to act like one.”

www.thedailybeast.com

 

[Mr. Manchester]

What if Hillary is the WuFlu patient zero?

Hillary is probably immune because her blood is always 30% gin and her lungs contain a far more vile and dangerous hag virus.

 

[Without A Gout]

What if Hillary is the WuFlu patient zero?

The Clinton Flu symptom involves a couple of bullets to the back of the head. There are no confirmed deaths, all causes of death are ruled as suicides.

 

[It's HK-47]

EAT DA POO POO

Now that you mention it, isn't it kind of funny that the party that decriminalized spreading HIV, has gone absolutely rampant on promoting sexual promiscuity, has made every effort to keep their streets covered in literal shit, constantly advocates for unrestricted immigration and opened borders, and has done absolutely nothing to curb homeless populations in their own communities is now suddenly concerned about spreading a disease?

I mean, I get it, it's kind of an apples and oranges sort of comparison, but there's still some measure of irony there. One of the most interesting aspects of this ordeal for me is measuring what politics "survive" in a crisis situation where people aren't afforded the luxury of just fucking around for Twitter points, and when the shit hit the fan that Social Justice mask hit the floor fast. All of these politics and policies immediately crumble when they're outside of a comfortable bubble and the same people who were screaming for opened borders a month ago are now shrieking for a complete and total lock-down of everything.

I thought that was really interesting.

 

[Allanon]

I gave up looking through the bill because my computer hates PDFs and lags out reading them, but some people on twitter/MSM is claiming the bill would boost the 1,200 to 1,500 and give $600 to unemployed or something like that. Basically, her version of the actually important part of the bill is functionally the same, but it's bloated with billions - possibly trillions - funneled to the government instead, $25 million dollars going directly into the pockets of the House. That's $25 million divided between 435, or...

"Nancy Pelosi proposes $1,500 to most Americans, except the unemployed who get $600, and the House of Representatives, each of which get $57,471"

Fifty-seven thousand dollars is how much she wants to give herself personally as a 'coronavirus related salary'. But it's okay, because it's not a 'slush fund' for corporations!

 

[augment]

I can't wait for these woke shitlords to grow out of their "active period" of typing garbage on blogs and on twitter, and go straight into ther onset adult nihilist, defeated phase. Hopefully with as much alcoholism as possible lest I hear from them again.

 

[Recoil]

the same people who were screaming for opened borders a month ago are now shrieking for a complete and total lock-down of everything.

Lefties tend to base their choices on emotion and feels. They also tend to lean towards centralized rule because they believe Law can function as a stand-in for individual responsibility.

 

[Ow The Edge]

No jokes here, RIP old timer. May God receive you warmly:

72-YEAR-OLD ITALIAN PRIEST WHO GAVE HIS VENTILATOR TO YOUNGER PATIENT DIES OF CORONAVIRUS
BY AILA SLISCO ON 3/23/20 AT 11:44 PM EDT

An elderly Catholic priest reportedly died from the COVID-19 coronavirus after refusing a ventilator so that a younger patient could use it instead.
Don Giuseppe Berardelli, 72, died March 15 at a hospital in Lovere, Italy after declining to use the medical equipment that his parishioners were said to have bought for him. Berardelli was a beloved figure well known for helping those with financial problems, as well as for riding on a motorcycle, according to Italian paper Araberara. He was praised on English language social media on Monday after news of his apparent sacrifice began to surface.
"He is a 'Martyr of Charity,' a saint like St. Maximilian Kolbe, who in Auschwitz volunteered to take the place of a condemned man with a family, and was killed," prominent Jesuit priest James Martin tweeted. "Don Giuseppe Berardelli, patron of those who suffer from coronavirus and all who care for them, pray for us!"

 

[XYZpdq]

and the House of Representatives, each of which get $57,471"

you have got to be shitting me