- Joined
- Feb 20, 2017
FTFYThese dudes really need to do less meth.
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FTFYThese dudes really need to do less meth.
slow roast a chicken? naw, you could microwave tendies and in that time sammie would find a new NOTW.For how long? 2 minutes and 15 seconds? I can slow roast a whole chicken, and in that time I guarantee Sammie has found the next dick to ride.
I guess social distancing makes it hard to find new NOTWs.
I was betting on Sammie being one of the first wuflu cows because she sluts around so much and interacts with anyone. Then I realized Sammy will probably just be a Typhoid Mary. Sammy will get the wuflu, have no symptoms, but spread it to her sickly kids, older mom and the elderly mom’s of her various NOTW who let their adult kids leech off of them.I guess social distancing makes it hard to find new NOTWs.
Low. Clarence is currently homeless, which means Sammie is probably currently homeless by choice with him. And for as stupid as she is, Sammie is VERY good at manipulating people into giving her places to stay. He needs her to keep a roof over his head. Also, I don't think he's smart enough to realize she's in an abusive relationship with Sammie, who is ABSOLUTELY going to dump him the second a more attractive candidate comes along. She clearly dislikes him.What are the odds of Clarence dumping her?
She went live from that screaming re.tarded girl Briannas house again... and Clarence is there, babbling in retardo while Sammie spins lies and stories about which nigga she banged in the same week is the fake baby daddy. The highlight so far for me is when Clarence says Antonio is going to deny the baby, and Sammie screeches about how she would take him to the Maury show. In a very classy move, Sammie discusses how well Antonio fucked her while her boyfriend is seated right beside her. She goes on to discuss to how fake baby is going to be cute if it's Antonios, and how she wants Antonio to be involved in the kids life, while giving Clarence a dirty look. She side eyes Clarence when saying that 'if' they break up she would go back to Antonio because she still loves him. She flat out admits that she wants Antonio to be the father eventually. Brianna the re.tard drops a few truth bombs, about how she would never date a man with no car, no job, no money, who still lives with his mama, earning uncomfortable looks from Sammie when Brianna laughs at Sammies insistence that Clarence/Antonio are 'trying' to get a job. Brianna seems oddly fixated on iPhones, and laments that her boyfriend, who apparently makes $20,000 a month, doesn't have an iPhone. Sammie says her first love was Antonio... not the only semi-stable and long term boyfriend she's ever had, and the father of her actual children, Austin. But Austin is white so that doesn't really jive with her mudshark image so I understand why she omitted him.
"I hope Antonio don't watch this. Because if Antonio watches this, he's gonna go 'awwwh this girl still got feelings for me'." Sammie, Antonio doesn't give a shit about you. He isn't going to watch half an hour of this nonsense, and even if he did? He doesn't care about you. He dumped you twice.
The second video starts off with (shockingly) more screaming from Brianna as Clarence threatens Antonio, probably in an ooga booga response to listening to his girlfriend talk about how amazing Antonio was and how much she misses him for the last half hour. Sammie, always the thoughtful intellectual, informs Clarence that if he kills Antonio, he's "taking a baby's life away". Because apparently imaginary babies die without their fathers? Unlike Antonios 8366 other actual children, who have seen neither hide nor hair of their father their entire lives but are doing okay. I have no idea why Clarence is putting up with any of this. Both of these dumb bitches are now threatening him and mocking him for dating to talk shit about St. Antonio. Clarence grumbles that he's going to put Antonio in a body bag, and Sammie pulls a shocked pikachu face and goes "Why would you do that when you know I love him?".
Brianna is now threatening to call the police on Clarence for not leaving. And now she's having some kind of exceptional individual fit. She's screaming and wailing and apparently breaking things, though Sammie doesn't show any of that. I have no idea who Brianna is, but she was talking shit about Antonio in the last video, but she's having a rage fit now over the idea of Clarence killing him. This is insanely bizarre. Sammie is now antagonizing a clearly upset Clarence and saying she can message Antonios brother, and somehow that will end in her fucking Antonio that night. Now she's insulting the way he walks (?) and says he looks like "a prostitute begging for money", whatever the fuck that means. Brianna announces that Sammie told her she wanted to leave Clarence, because he "stutters and is exceptional" and that she doesn't love Clarence and his "dusty ass" and that she thinks Clarence has a little dick. Sammie, who is clearly loving the bullshit drama she's in the center of, than describes Antonios dick as "fat and big" and a "God damn horse dick".
At some point, Clarence announces that Sammie is going to "get right back on ice". Ice being a street term for meth. I really don't think Sammie did meth for a myriad of reasons. Sammie and Brianna get visibly angry at this comment and... it devolves into Sammie screaming that Clarence needs to give her her cigarettes, and that her momma bought her those cigarettes! When Clarence says no, Sammie announces that... she is going to call her momma. A 24 year old woman is threatening to call her mother at almost midnight, because her mentally handicapped boyfriend isn't giving her her cigarettes. Mama Bushart doesn't deserve this shit. At this point, some mystery person shows up and proceeds to speak calmly and reasonably... and everyone in the room disregards her. Sammie is now crying and talking about how she cheated on Antonio SIX. TIMES. while he was in jail. And she knew the fake twins she miscarried somewhere in between those six cocks was Antonios because he had food cravings. Sammie goes on to say Antonio is a good father because he cried about the dead fake twins. I think a good father would probably do something to care for his 79687493 not dead and not fake kids he produced, but I guess that isn't reasonable. Apparently Antonio was going to buy the fake twins a crib, and that proves what an amazing father he was. Calmed now, after listening to this mystery woman mumble something, Sammie announces that Clarence has to be happy being cucked by Antonio if he's going to be with her. Oh, never mind, she's crying again talking about Antonio hugging her after he dumped her.
The whole thing ends with Sammie asking Clarence to not talk shit about Antonio. Clarence mumbles something, Sammie looks angry, and it ends. The amount of screaming these people do is unreal. It's honestly a room full of actual re.tards... when Sammie seems to be the smartest, most well spoken one, something is seriously wrong.
"I think the reason why I'm smoking a lot is because of the pregnancy" <My favorite quote out of this whole cluster fuck.
So, in todays Live, Sammie is on day two or three of wearing her Tupac shirt. She's cooking an absolutely massive pan of... something, while Clarence creeps around kind of muttering at the camera. The meat is so loud I can't really understand him. They're apparently still at Briannas house, because I can still hear that fucking smoke detector chirping. Sammie adds a God awful amount of salt and keeps mashing and stirring whatever the fuck this is around. Sammie wants to make Kool-Aid in a tard cum bottle. A dog started barking and almost blew my headphones out at this point, and a fat white (maybe?) woman enters the kitchen and quickly leaves. Clarence is now attempting to rap Old Town Road, a song only the most thuggish of niggas enjoy. Sammie proves she is actually down with the blacks by bitching about the lack of seasoning in Briannas kitchen. Clarence says his momma can't cook like Sammie, which is the most tragic shit I've ever heard. Sammie asks Clarence to taste the meat, since she did the seasoning. Apparently she can't do that?
Clarence is rocking and swaying and repeating himself over and over, something about his mother. He leans down into the phone and remarks on how many people are watching (It was about 5) and Sammie preens about how everyone is watching her cook. I think they may be making spaghetti? Clarence keeps babbling about not having sauce. THEY'RE POURING THE BEEF FAT OUT THE DOOR ONTO THE GROUND. Apparently Briannas house doesn't have an oven, because they're using the same hot plate to cook everything. Oh my God she's taking spaghetti noodles, snapping them in half, and dropping them into cold water.
"I like your parents, they treat me better than my parents"... Yes, Clarence, that's because you're a stranger and I imagine Mama Bushart is nice enough to be polite to strangers. Even when it's a re.tarded homeless man who is banging your daughter. Clarence begins to rant about how his mother changed the locks on her home and now he's homeless, and how she can get in trouble for that because he can't get his stuff. Apparently he doesn't have any shoes (?) and he needs shoes for work. But he doesn't have a job. Sammie has put in most of a two pound bag of spaghetti, into the still unboiling water. She's letting Clarence hold the bag like a little kid who wants to help rotfl. There's so much pasta the water isn't covering it anymore, but she's adding more. Oh my God. Clarence is talking about making tard cum Kool-Aid while he leans in to see who is watching. "Everyone is in on here expect one person!". Sammie pouts and laments that Antonio isn't watching, and Clarence recoils, before trying to change the topic to cheese. Sammie adds a tiny amount of salt to her unboiling water and mountain of pasta.
"Everybody loves my cooking. Almost everybody loves my cooking." She keeps touching her visibly unwashed hair and her face before sticking her fingers into the container with the meat to pick out bits to nibble on. Sammie honestly talks to Clarence like a child. She keeps telling him to pick shit up, to go get things for her, to do shit. She isn't asking, she's very matter of factually telling him to wash a fast food cup out to go get her Dr Pepper. Which is apparently on the floor next to the bed, which is the best place for soda. This is where I want to remind everyone Sammie is a diabetic. She's talking about Antonio again... and Clarence is now babbling about how his mother used to hit him. And how he wants to slap his mother, and... something about a gingerbread man? Sammie just lifted a visibly hard piece of pasta out of the barely simmering water, and seemed shocked that it wasn't done.
They're talking about cheese again. The water has cooked out of the pan, and they're dumping cold water on top of the mountain of semi-cooked pasta. Sammie is steady eating the meat out of the container with her dirty hands. Clarence is talking about going to work again. Maybe he does have a job? More water. Sammie says she doesn't mind going back to jail for some reason, and puts on her sassy hood accent so that she can threaten Clarence's mother, in the event that she doesn't give Clarence his shit. He seems delighted at the idea of his short, morbidly obese 'pregnant' girlfriend attacking his mother. Sammie is now eating noodles out of the pot, with her dirty hands.
SHE'S DUMPING THE MEAT INTO THE NOODLES WITHOUT DRAINING ANY OF THE WATER WHAT THE HELL? Antonio is babbling about someone being trapped in a car trunk. NOW she's pouring the water out? What the fuck. She's now adding multiple huge jars of discount brand pasta sauce. There's so much food in the pan it's spilling over. Clarence is using his hands to slop the spilled food onto the ground. And that's it.
Low. Clarence is currently homeless, which means Sammie is probably currently homeless by choice with him. And for as stupid as she is, Sammie is VERY good at manipulating people into giving her places to stay. He needs her to keep a roof over his head. Also, I don't think he's smart enough to realize she's in an abusive relationship with Sammie, who is ABSOLUTELY going to dump him the second a more attractive candidate comes along. She clearly dislikes him.
At some point, Clarence announces that Sammie is going to "get right back on ice". Ice being a street term for meth. I really don't think Sammie did meth for a myriad of reasons. Sammie and Brianna get visibly angry at this comment and...
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Imagine being a plate of poorly cooked spaghetti and this is what you see before you're devoured
I both love and hate you for writing this out. Good job recapping solider.Sammie has changed shirts, apparently, but not showered. Clarence has given up on his shirt entirely, so we're being treated to the sight of his skinny fat chest and stomach. I think they're in a hotel, with DeWayne. More loud rap, more gang ganging. Clarence kissed Sammies cheek, who immediately yells at DeWayne, asking if he wants 'in on it'. Than she pans the camera around to DeWayne... who is also shirtless, and sitting on a bed. Apparently he's 'over there being crazy' but it just looks like he's messing with his phone. Clarence informs us DeWayne is a blood, and starts gang ganging, before grabbing Sammies tiddy. In response, Sammie starts asking DeWayne if he wants hugs and kisses. He says yes, and than Sammie asks if he wants some Hershey's. Apparently this is hilarious, as Sammie and Clarence start scream-laughing.
"I would give you a hug, but I ain't got no pants on under here. And I ain't got no underwear on either." Sammie is apparently half undressed in a room with two re.tarded niggas. More Hersey's jokes... I guess they're jokes anyway? More gang ganging, and they keep yelling "swoop" or something. Clarence is clinging to Sammie and licking her. Jesus Christ. Sammie is waddling across the room to the bed and is now sandwiched between DeWayne and Clarence. DeWayne is now grabbing Sammies tits. In maybe the most classy move Sammie has made in a while, she offers to be both of their girl. More gang ganging, more babbling, and it abruptly ends.
I think Sammie is getting the double stuff tonight. It's amazing that this unwashed, obese, utterly insane woman is finding multiple men at a time to bang her. They aren't men I would ever even consider, but it cracks me up that Sammie is drowning in cock when so many of the Deathfats can't get a mans attention when they try, or have to make do with sexless, caretaker based relationships.
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