Cultcow Russell Greer / Mr. Green / @ just_some_dude_named_russell29 / A Safer Nevada PAC - Swift-Obsessed Sex Pest, Convicted of E-Stalking, "Eggshell Skull Plaintiff" Pro Se Litigant, Homeless, aspiring brothel owner

If you were Taylor Swift, whom would you rather date?

  • Russell Greer

    Votes: 117 4.5%

  • Travis Kelce

    Votes: 138 5.3%

  • Null

    Votes: 1,454 55.8%

  • Kanye West

    Votes: 286 11.0%

  • Ariana Grande

    Votes: 609 23.4%
  • Total voters
    2,604
TheGreatCitracett said:
Yeah what the hell?

I make him music videos for free and everything.

What an ungrateful little pecker. Maybe I should sue him for not acknowledging my efforts.
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He looked up at me through his tear-stained eyes. "Oh, Zit, zis iz da nishest shing any guy hajh ever done for me! You know what it makesh me want to do?"

My mouth went dry. "My degree isn't in mind-reading, Hotlips."

He looked at me saucily. "Letsh... hab.... ISHE CRAM!"

I looked up towards the limo driver. "Null, to the Coldstone Creamery at once!"

"Right away, Sir!" He said in a British accent.

Sorry guys but I absolutely refuse to go back and reread that scene and quote it verbatim on a Sunday night.
 
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FernandoPooTragedy said:
He looked up at me through his tear-stained eyes. "Oh, Zit, zis iz da nishest shing any guy hajh ever done for me! You know what it makesh me want to do?"

My mouth went dry. "My degree isn't in mind-reading, Hotlips."

He looked at me saucily. "Letsh... hab.... ISHE CRAM!"

I looked up towards the limo driver. "Null, to the Coldstone Creamery at once!"

"Right away, Sir!" He said in a British accent.

Sorry guys but I absolutely refuse to go back and reread that scene and quote it verbatim on a Sunday night.
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Horrifying, thank you.
 
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The Littlest Shitlord said:
That's quite the BAC there. Like Russ, Jesus is not allowed to drive a car, ever. Seriously, though, Mormons don't believe in transubstantiation, and Mormon sacrament doesn't use wine.
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A religion that doesnt let you drink on a Sunday morning isn't a religion I want be in.
 
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The Littlest Shitlord said:
Mormon sacrament doesn't use wine.
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I never cease to be amazed by the excuses that some denominations come up with to try to say that wine doesn't really mean wine. Jesus' first recorded miracle was changing some water into wine for a huge party which you knew was the good stuff because everyone got fucking shitfaced. Elsewhere, he literally said that people accused him of being a drunkard. His response wasn't "well I never! nary a drop on these lips!" it was "fuck yeah, I'm the bridegroom, bitches, let's party."
 
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Kosher Salt said:
I never cease to be amazed by the excuses that some denominations come up with to try to say that wine doesn't really mean wine. Jesus' first recorded miracle was changing some water into wine for a huge party which you knew was the good stuff because everyone got fucking shitfaced. Elsewhere, he literally said that people accused him of being a drunkard. His response wasn't "well I never! nary a drop on these lips!" it was "fuck yeah, I'm the bridegroom, bitches, let's party."
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Jesus would smash an empty wine bottle over Russ’ head before lecturing him to stop pestering Mary.
 
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SojuDrnkr said:
All Russ needs are friends... And a decent publicist who can get him fricken famous
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Russell had friends. He drove them away when they didn't constantly stroke his ego. Even if he had a decent publicist who was willing to work for free (Russ isn't going to pay a single red nickle) to make him famous, he would squander it all. At the end of the day, Russell Greer is his own worst enemy. He destroyed every good thing he had; it's only a matter of time before he goes too far and his family washes their hands of him.
 
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russ breakfast.png
 
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My favorite use of the anxiety card was when he claimed Hof couldn't ban him from his brothels because he posted his slanders because of his anxiety and since anxiety is a protected disability, he can't be banned. Obviously, it doesn't work like that. If I'm an alcoholic, my boss can't fire me just for that. But if I come to work drunk and punch the FedEx guy in the face for wearing purple and then take a shit on the CEO's desk, yes I can be fired.
 
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TheGreatCitracett said:
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I love that Russ is constantly demanding people do this kind of thing for him, but when has he EVER done the same for a friend? And yeah, I know, he has no friends, but he's had years on facebook to repost someone, ANYONE'S, art, photography, even promote their MLM shit or anything really but the only time he ever talks about his friends is when he wants something from them, like the above post, or like poor Ken who is always used to prove his flawed points (Well my friend Ken is gay and he says he hates cakes so everyone should shut up about them! Or he would, if he hadn't been blown up by internet stalkers)

I can't imagine how maddening it would be as a good Mormon Kid to have your parent's demand you include God's Favourite Idiot in all your adventures only to have him constantly making demands to prove your worth as his friend.

On that note, I do think Ken may be my favourite fictional character that any cow has created (Sorry Chris). He's a successful, gay, lawyer who always has time for a friend, but despite his altrustic nature was still smart enough to never offer Russ a job.
Too bad he got blown up.

Captain Hair said:
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I wouldn't normally have noticed the "aim for the stars" comment if this post wasn't right on the heels of the Russ edit with a gun.
Now it (jokingly) worries me
 
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