Cultcow EvaXephon / Yanderedev / Alex Mahan / Alexander Stuart Mahan / cannotgoogleme - Edgy weeaboo coomer with pedo tendencies and 15+ years internet history as a lolcow, now known as a disaster developer behind eternal debug build called "Yandere Simulator", confirmed groomer and dollfucker

[LiquidKid]

For fucks sake Alex, did you have to put the television in front of the fucking curtains?

I know a lot of people do that to avoid glare

 

[LurkerDog]

Jay, I genuinely like you. Please for your sake.. He sounds so SO tired of this challenge.

Edit cause HOLY FUCK The lag is incredible.

 

[Cosmos]

Question: Which will come first, the collision of the Andromeda and Milky Way galaxies, or Yandere Simulator's release?

Spoiler: Answer

It's a trick question. The collision of the Andromeda and Milky Way galaxies is a scientific certainty, whereas Yandere Simulator will never be released.

 

[Love Machine]

I have a question I've been debating with myself and I figured I would pose it here. Lets say by some miracle he gets the game out in... like a year from now. On a technical level it is "playable" and it really is on par with a low budget hitman rip off, would that absolve him of his lolcow status by any notable margin? or has the stuff like the emails and the gremlin video eternally cemented his status?

I guess my Tl;dr for the question is, how much does the game being on eternal development contribute to people making fun of him?

 

[Catgirls are Love]

I have a question I've been debating with myself and I figured I would pose it here. Lets say by some miracle he gets the game out in... like a year from now. On a technical level it is "playable" and it really is on par with a low budget hitman rip off, would that absolve him of his lolcow status by any notable margin? or has the stuff like the emails and the gremlin video eternally cemented his status?

I guess my Tl;dr for the question is, how much does the game being on eternal development contribute to people making fun of him?

If he were to actually complete his game and release it in a playable state without any notable problems he would subsequently ignore people would eventually stop giving him too much grief over Yandere Simulator and both he and the game could fade into obscurity. That said, if he didn't change his everyday behavior in addition to completing his game his status as a lolcow wouldn't be going anywhere.

So long as he keeps being creepy in Twitch streams, ruling over his online fiefdoms like Reddit and Discord with an iron fist, ceaselessly complaining about and overreacting to his various detractors, pretending his awkward past doesn't exist, maintaining a cult-like following of believers, and believing himself worthy of respect and recognition despite putting in the barest minimum of work and learning, he shall continue to be an object of mockery and amusement, and thus, a lolcow.

TL;DR - If he grows up, everyone making fun of him will fuck off. Else we'll be here forever.

 

[Gilgamesh The Pharmacy]

I have a question I've been debating with myself and I figured I would pose it here. Lets say by some miracle he gets the game out in... like a year from now. On a technical level it is "playable" and it really is on par with a low budget hitman rip off, would that absolve him of his lolcow status by any notable margin? or has the stuff like the emails and the gremlin video eternally cemented his status?

I guess my Tl;dr for the question is, how much does the game being on eternal development contribute to people making fun of him?

Yes and no. to the people who weren't that invested into it, they'll enjoy it for a bit and forget about it when a better game comes out. But to the people who know his true nature and the dick-riding kid's who where expecting the best game of the century, hell no.

Human's don't forget thing's that they hate, ( take world war 1or2 for example) and they especially don't forget thing's that don't meet their standards ( i.e Sonic 06). But he's not a lolcow because his code is shit, he's one because, he's the manifestation of that guy who's been copying the answer of his friends sheet, and when the teacher finds out says that his friend coped from him. He's also a perverted, lazy incel that would make other incels and perverts shake their head in embarrassment.

 

[Lurk Jurk]

https://youtu.be/gKo0AQupKNo

Jay, I genuinely like you. Please for your sake.. He sounds so SO tired of this challenge.

Edit cause HOLY FUCK The lag is incredible.

I await the day Jay finally just turns on the game. You can already tell he's sick of it, and he's been clickbaiting with negative titles lately, but he still plays up any positivity he can cause it gets views.

 

[Banworld]

I have a question I've been debating with myself and I figured I would pose it here. Lets say by some miracle he gets the game out in... like a year from now. On a technical level it is "playable" and it really is on par with a low budget hitman rip off, would that absolve him of his lolcow status by any notable margin? or has the stuff like the emails and the gremlin video eternally cemented his status?

I guess my Tl;dr for the question is, how much does the game being on eternal development contribute to people making fun of him?

Alex was a lolcow before he even thought of YandereSimulator - he used to plug his streams on /v/ and /a/, and everyone told him to fuck off. He was to those boards what Clawshrimpy was to /mecha/, a tripfag who shat up all conversation with his autistic obsessions.

He had to hide the fact he was EvaXephon from /v/ because he was such a persona non grata, and was only tolerated cause people were interested in his project. Even if YandereSimulator didn't exist, check out his website where he compares NGE to RahXephon where comparisons include stuff like 'both characters get blood on their hands in the first episode and look at it' or some shit. He unironically believed one ripped the other off for stuff like that.

 

[ducktales4gameboy]

Even if he somehow manages to finish and release the game the cuphead video and subreddit buyout are going to haunt him forever.

 

[José Mourinho]

I have a question I've been debating with myself and I figured I would pose it here. Lets say by some miracle he gets the game out in... like a year from now. On a technical level it is "playable" and it really is on par with a low budget hitman rip off, would that absolve him of his lolcow status by any notable margin? or has the stuff like the emails and the gremlin video eternally cemented his status?

I guess my Tl;dr for the question is, how much does the game being on eternal development contribute to people making fun of him?

The best case scenario would involve the game being successfully funded on Kickstarter and Alex has a positive relationship with the professional team he hires and the game would be a mediocre game at least/worst. It still won't absolve him of his lolcow status unless he actually apologizes for the stuff he does which afaik he refuses to for the most part.

 

[Neurotic Loser]

I have a question I've been debating with myself and I figured I would pose it here. Lets say by some miracle he gets the game out in... like a year from now. On a technical level it is "playable" and it really is on par with a low budget hitman rip off, would that absolve him of his lolcow status by any notable margin? or has the stuff like the emails and the gremlin video eternally cemented his status?

I guess my Tl;dr for the question is, how much does the game being on eternal development contribute to people making fun of him?

To absolve Alex of his lolcow status 2 main things need to happen.
Firstly, he needs to take responsiblity for his actions and behaviour. I.E. appologues to everyone he wronged (ex-fans, Mike Z, Tiny Build etc.) and pay the people who's working for him. He would also need to redo the entire look of the game in order to not use store-bought assets.
Secondly he would need to stop taking himself so seriously. Like take other's advice, not gloat about how hard he is "working" and, (most importantly) ignore the "trolls".
He he does that then, no matter how bad YanSim is or how long it takes to complete, he would lose his lolcow status.
As the only reason he's a lolcow is because he reacts easily to negativity and is an unlikeable person.

 

[Juan But Not Forgotten]

I have a question I've been debating with myself and I figured I would pose it here. Lets say by some miracle he gets the game out in... like a year from now. On a technical level it is "playable" and it really is on par with a low budget hitman rip off, would that absolve him of his lolcow status by any notable margin? or has the stuff like the emails and the gremlin video eternally cemented his status?

I guess my Tl;dr for the question is, how much does the game being on eternal development contribute to people making fun of him?

You are talking about a guy, who could tell "No, I am not a pedophile, these are just terrible rumors from my detractors", but instead went with "Oi MATE HOW BOUT SEX LICENSE". From a bunch of decisions, where 2 are good, 5 are ok and 1 is terrible, he will choose the last one and that's why he is a cow. Also, so many people are still interested in this because it's free, but if he charges at least 30 bucks for this (he will charge 60, because he has worked alone long and hard), I'm not sure people will be so happy.

 

[SomewhatNormal]

I await the day Jay finally just turns on the game. You can already tell he's sick of it, and he's been clickbaiting with negative titles lately, but he still plays up any positivity he can cause it gets views.

Just watched the video and Jay is PISSED. He sounds like he's about to lose his freaking mind. Either way, I don't think Jay and YS are going to survive 2020. Especially with everybody being stuck at home rn, I can see a surge in indie video games and pretty soon, something is going to start trending and become the new cash cow for Jay.

 

[LitmusPaper]

Just watched the video and Jay is PISSED. He sounds like he's about to lose his freaking mind. Either way, I don't think Jay and YS are going to survive 2020.

I'm watching his most recent one now, and the amount of issues he had even playing the game because it's a lump of shit is mind-boggling. Lag, corpses going into the floor, inability to change clothes for no reason, all in the first two minutes of the video. The challenge has a lot of students to kill so it takes a long time to complete, and if any bugs pop that breaks the game you have to start again from the very beginning because of something completely out of your control.

The sad part is, all you get at the end of it is a shitty Osana Easter Egg. Not an unlockable that you can change into, but a splash screen. If anything it's in poor taste as it just rubs people's noses in it that Osana isn't in the game.

 

[Things Better Forgotten]

Also, so many people are still interested in this because it's free, but if he charges at least 30 bucks for this (he will charge 60, because he has worked alone long and hard), I'm not sure people will be so happy.

It just occurred to me, lets assume that the game is actually finished and released (I know, I know). Steam probably won't allow it due to panty shots (and even if they did, alogs from /r/Osana might flag it down), which more or less means he's going to release the game independently. Now, to the point: what kind of paper thin copy protection is he going to try to include?

I just have this vision of Alex, finally, finally completing his love quest video game. Only for it to sell exactly one copy, and from there literally everyone on Earth pirates it.

 

[Cast Away]

Had to share this masterpiece I saw on YouTube

 

[Kaede Did Nothing Wrong]

wow
View attachment 1250924

he arbitrarily grabs industry jargon to make up weird rules about the way thing must be done. and the way things must be done, funny enough, always demands delays. and he always tells people these rules as if scolding them.

Apparently Alex is so depressed he can't work on the game, and has no idea when Osana is going to released. All because of us gosh darn gremlins I guess all he has now is his free thousands of dollars a month from Patreon, with no need to actually work for that (this was taken from r/osana BTW)

View attachment 1250928

it's a precarious situation if reality is catching up to him. a shoddy, artless product in front of him that doesn't match his self-image. better keep blaming other people to resolve dissonance. it was so close to completion on feb 14th, then trolls snatched it at the last moment! he did nothing wrong! he did everything correct!

can't really make up my mind about the suicide baiting. it is histrionics to get sympathy and attention. but he also checks enough boxes and dug a deep enough hole to be "at risk" imo. who knows where his saga will take him.

 

[Things Better Forgotten]

can't really make up my mind about the suicide baiting. it is histrionics to get sympathy and attention. but he also checks enough boxes and dug a deep enough hole to be "at risk" imo. who knows where his saga will take him.

I wouldn't take the suicide bating seriously until the Patreon money dries up. As long as the money is coming in he can lie to himself (and everyone else) about the state of the game/his life.

 

[Juan But Not Forgotten]

It just occurred to me, lets assume that the game is actually finished and released (I know, I know). Steam probably won't allow it due to panty shots (and even if they did, alogs from /r/Osana might flag it down), which more or less means he's going to release the game independently.

Well, I don't see many problems with that. As far as I know Steam has visual novels about high school, but with usual "All characters are 18" bullshit and "adult content" tag. Has Alex mentioned why his isn't in Early access? This shit is designed for shady developers, who wanna run with the money.

 

[Lexi62]

I await the day Jay finally just turns on the game. You can already tell he's sick of it, and he's been clickbaiting with negative titles lately, but he still plays up any positivity he can cause it gets views.

I haven't checked the comments for this video yet, but one thing I've noticed in the past ones, is that there are plenty of people who watch Jaw and would be perfectly fine if he stopped playing it for awhile. Don't get me wrong, there's still a lot of comments asking for more videos on the "game" (I put air quotes because although you can play it, it's impossible to win and therefore not a game), and since it generates the most views he's going to want to play it more. Hopefully overtime people will start to get tired of it, seeing he's played hundreds of episodes worth, and want to see new content.