Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

God you two, just release a sex tape already. Seriously though, with the state of mind, perpetual drug abuse, and level of collective attention whoring those two are at right now I'll bet you dollars to donuts a sex tape will be made and one of those chucklefucks will post it as 'revenge porn' when the relationship inevitably goes tits up. It's beautiful that Lowtax finally found someone as big of a toxic degenerate as he is. I can't wait to see how this ends. The fallout from this breakup is going to be Shakespearean in its execution.
 
Even if was funny (and it isn't) but even if it was - the joke is from 2004. It would be akin to releasing a "Who let the dogs out?" t-shirt in 2020 - it's so fucking old.
To be fair, it was mildly amusing in 2004.

Posted in the SA thread, but it needs record here as well because it is another poor idea of dear Richard.

Logan is now an admin.
This is a post that makes me wish I could give it every rating simultaneously.
 
There's no humor in it to defend, but 'city name sports team' is a pretty obvious swipe at vapid sports merchandising. A dude probably thought it was a brilliant piece of social commentary at some point by which merch could get 'ironically' successfully peddled, but it didn't work.

Like I said earlier, it is REALLY not going to work at a moment in history where not only does bitching about sports in general have no tone, but nobody gives a fuck about what they're wearing right now because we're all either staying indoors, or taking 'redneck Call of Duty cosplay' to a city capital.

City Name Sports Team is distilled Lowtax.
Its a - not funny, but amusing - concept, poking fun at sports merchandizing and the fact the gear you overpaid for boils down to "city name, sports team". The problem with the design (especially in TYOL 2020) is that the design is lazy. There's no sport team logo that looks like that. The icon was dated on release, it looks cheap.

There's a bunch of places you could go with this: Have it in Yankees font. Do one of those "Property of" tees. Hell, go woke and have City Name, Racial Slur with the Redskins font. Something. Anything.

The really hilarity there is Lowtax had a forum of talented graphic arts and photoshop goods. He could have started a Photoshop Friday for "Give me City Name Sports Team in the style of your favorite team!" and gotten an entire league's worth of merch he could sling.
Fuck, you have a forum and a front page. Have City Name Sports Team shit that apes the colors of sports team merch, and challenge goons to insert themselves into group shots of people in official gear.

But that requires more effort than zero, and there's a lot of ambien he hasn't taken yet.

This is why Lowtax gets me MOTI; he's had so much shit just get dumped in his lap,and does nothing with it. The nigga was making $13K a month off patreon for just existing, and still complained.
 
Fuck, you have a forum and a front page. Have City Name Sports Team shit that apes the colors of sports team merch, and challenge goons to insert themselves into group shots of people in official gear.

Plus you'd get even more publicity from the inevitable lolsuit threats.

Is this even a revival of the idea or were there just mountains of this leftover trash lying around Casa Mangosteen? He's apparently been trying to give this shit away for years with little success, only able to force it on people with some relation to the site.
 
Is this even a revival of the idea or were there just mountains of this leftover trash lying around Casa Mangosteen? He's apparently been trying to give this shit away for years with little success, only able to force it on people with some relation to the site.

It was absolutely lying around collecting dust in Casa Mangosteen. It's so old I wouldn't be surprised if it disintegrates upon its first wear. And yeah, I was about to say, get the good photoshoppers to do something, maybe get Everdread involved. Goons would be clamoring on top of each other to make merch for Daddy Tax free of charge. There's no reason on God's green Earth to hire a marketing expert, oh wait-it's just a cover story for their grotesque sexual escapades.

Never since Noah "Spoony" Antwiler have I seen someone with a ready-made fanbase that could potentially be capitalized upon so much for such little work, and yet that small bit of effort is just too much. The only difference is that Spoony actually faced consequences for being a dick to his fans and producing nothing - his Patreon plummeted, his house has been forclosed on, and entire documentaries have been made about why he sucks. Yet goons just keep on SIMPin' and giving this man an upper-middle class salary. Not just for doing absolutely nothing, but also being an abject, irredeemable scumbag. A scumbag who is the antithesis of their own hyper-feminist, pinko, globo-homo values. SA should be a case study in group psychosis.
 
But Lady Ambien was an mod, did you love her more than me???‽! I’m your SA business partner too Richard...,Reeeeeeeeeee!! You haven’t sent money for any of my big boss lady business woman ideas....reeeeee!!!

*Poof*
Logan is an SA Admin. Look for lots of shitty ads in your near future Troons.

Fucking excellent, Richard. You just keep fucking up again and again, and you don't learn jack-shit from it. No wonder SA is in the sad state it is currently in. Approaching Me-Too territory here, though as we've seen with his recent wife, that only applies to those the goons hate.
 
Plus you'd get even more publicity from the inevitable lolsuit threats.

Which would obviously fall under fair use for parody, so Leonard J Crabbs could respond to the C&Ds with wacky zany pseudo-lawyer shit and put it on *the front page*

But all this would require a modicum of effort and money to print new merch when he thinks the shit that's lying around that people paid for and didn't receive is still worth full retail. Never going to happen.

I predict Bogan will fuck up the forums by pushing buttons multiple times, and then of course when she leaves just irreparably nuke the entire thing.

Is it all still on one server? Wait I know the answer to that already

Edit: TRULY THE CUTTING EDGE OF COMEDY

Screenshot_20200504-212949__01.jpg
 
In high school I was absolutely ready to buy a city name sports team shirt or hat, it would have totally shown those idiot jocks!! But the design was absolutely unwearable even then. The shirts and hats were God awful quality too. I was baffled at how incredibly dated and bad the logo was, it was a novelty item from the late 90s at very best.

The most viable merch would probably feature goon in-jokes and ancient SA memes. Too much work, though.
 
That was Kevin Bowman. He was super active in the BBS on the planet network and made planethalflife/fortress

Lowtax was originally a writer for PQ, iirc that’s where JeffK and that old dude gimmick came from

edit: Cliff Yablonsky, that was it
 
I predict Bogan will fuck up the forums by pushing buttons multiple times, and then of course when she leaves just irreparably nuke the entire thing.
According to a former admin, the admin panel on SA is very buggy and slapdash and poorly understood, with shit like a list of user roles including ones that are marked as “NEVER, EVER FUCKING TOUCH THIS ROLE” and nobody knows why. They also have a Delete Post button on every post that they cannot use (because it breaks things) and cannot patch out (because doing so would break even more things). Hell, even their wordfilter is a kludge; if someone posts the word “rape” then it gets deepfiltered to “surprise sex” and then after the page load, a bit of javascript activates to change “surprise sex” to “chomp wad.” Try it yourself, just F5 a page where you can find the phrase “chomp wad” and watch for the words to shift.

Once someone put the SA Support Bot account on probation as some kind of Hilarious Joke. It was funny but not in the way they had intended: Whenever someone reports a post, SA Support Bot posts the report in the form of a new thread in a hidden subforum. If it can’t do this, it tries again and again until the server crashes.

tl;dr if and when this gal turns vindictive, Richard’s bunny is gonna fuckin’ boil.
 
According to a former admin, the admin panel on SA is very buggy and slapdash and poorly understood, with shit like a list of user roles including ones that are marked as “NEVER, EVER FUCKING TOUCH THIS ROLE” and nobody knows why. They also have a Delete Post button on every post that they cannot use (because it breaks things) and cannot patch out (because doing so would break even more things). Hell, even their wordfilter is a kludge; if someone posts the word “rape” then it gets deepfiltered to “surprise sex” and then after the page load, a bit of javascript activates to change “surprise sex” to “chomp wad.” Try it yourself, just F5 a page where you can find the phrase “chomp wad” and watch for the words to shift.

Once someone put the SA Support Bot account on probation as some kind of Hilarious Joke. It was funny but not in the way they had intended: Whenever someone reports a post, SA Support Bot posts the report in the form of a new thread in a hidden subforum. If it can’t do this, it tries again and again until the server crashes.

tl;dr if and when this gal turns vindictive, Richard’s bunny is gonna fuckin’ boil.

Jesus. If I were Richard I'd just pack up the site and move it to a subreddit or something. It's not like new people care enough about SA nowadays to register there, just get the money by making them donating to your patreon monthly instead.
 
  • Agree
Reactions: BOLDYSPICY!
Jesus. If I were Richard I'd just pack up the site and move it to a subreddit or something. It's not like new people care enough about SA nowadays to register there, just get the money by making them donating to your patreon monthly instead.

I think even the troons he currently has donating would realize there's absolutely no reason to donate to a subreddit.
 
Jesus. If I were Richard I'd just pack up the site and move it to a subreddit or something. It's not like new people care enough about SA nowadays to register there, just get the money by making them donating to your patreon monthly instead.
Nah, I‘m sure he gets plenty of money from all the micro transactions. Plus, it’s free content. Not *good* content, but still potential money from someone else’s effort.
 
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  • Agree
Reactions: Mandarys Milan II
Nah, I‘m sure he gets plenty of money from all the micro transactions. Plus, it’s free content. Not *good* content, but still potential money from someone else’s effort.
I'm pretty sure all the gay shit you can pay for on reddit just goes straight to the last bastion of freeze peach on the innanets
 
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