Which lolcow would you unironically sex?

[Crunchy Leaf]

Rory rcdart...I like skinny girls with fluffy hair.

 

[Newman's Own]

Either Shoe On Head or Sheila Allen.

Bonus points for Sheila since she's crazy and you know what they say about crazy in the sack. She also used to be an escort so most users here probably stand a shot with her provided you pony up some cash or UFO footage.

Spoiler: SHEILA's LEWDS

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Check the date on that ad she put up.

"Used to be" is a premature assessment.

I just tried to load your archive for a screen grab and it looks like it got nuked.

 

[Smug Freiza]

Check the date on that ad she put up.

"Used to be" is a premature assessment.

I just tried to load your archive for a screen grab and it looks like it got nuked.

View attachment 1313040

I just checked and got the same notification, she's adapting. Better warn others about it in her thread and the CG thread.

@Analog Devolved

 

[HIVidaBoheme]

Eh I guess Matpat, or Lissandro Clerici. Ready for my Islamic ratings: also Lurch.

 

[Underestimated Nutria]

Would still fuck Milo Y. for sure. Onision would be doable if he'd bathe very carefully and get all that gunk and greasiness off him. If it turns out that he's badly scarred or something under all that makeup, I might pass, I think.

 

[Grinrow]

I wanna fuck Emily Mucus while she spergs out about the jooz and the the white race.

 

[Johan Schmidt]

Lindsey ellis would be a fun slampiggy just to see what I could get her to do.

Shoe On Head is my secret Simpshame. I'd smash that and probably be weak enough to stick around afterwards if she asked.

 

[Harbinger of Kali Yuga]

I'd eat Brittany Venti's fetal alcohol syndrome asshole.

 

[Buster O'Keefe]

Everyone in @DocHoliday1977's thread has extreme thirst.

 

[Baguette Child]

Would still fuck Milo Y.

I said it before in this thread, and I'll say it again: I am 100% sure that Milo legit knows how to have a good time in bed, and he's totally got a leg up over other cows in that it looks like he actually showers and practices basic hygiene.

 

[Lady of the House]

hbomberguy, if he still has his hair. I'd peg him.

 

[Hakuba Gaijin]

Definitely ok boomer girl. Seems an absolute ditz and her politics are sophmoric but love to go a few rounds with her if she promised not to speak.

 

[A Owl]

Tonetta, minus the poop?

 

[tamarafurret]

trisha paytas. no additional comment

 

[snailslime]

onision (if he wasn't psychotic) and ok boomer girl

also pre-transition contrapoints

 

[Stilgar of Troon]

It pains me to admit it, but I'd probably be willing to give shoe0nhead a week of tricky shits.

 

[Stardust]

Shoe0nHead could get the strapon, and young Spoony too. Equality, yo.

 

[Lady of the House]

hbomberguy, if he still has his hair. I'd peg him.

also after remembering that this exists, maybe i'd peg projared as well. i like men who look like birds i guess.

Ready for Islamic ratings but i'd peg the infamous jimmy savile when he was young since i grew up on the top of the pops. Not past the 1980s though.

 

[Dick Justice]

Check the date on that ad she put up.

"Used to be" is a premature assessment.

I just tried to load your archive for a screen grab and it looks like it got nuked.

View attachment 1313040

You know avast datamines you and resells that, right? Or maybe you just don't care because you're already whoring yourself to microsoft and amazon.

 

[Margo Martindale]

Id fug Onison