I call bullshit how do you live with someone, date them, and not notice they’re a pedophile?
I'm not going to make excuses for that guy's partner because I don't know the full story, but I think that this sentiment is kind of naive.
Some people get away with having whole other bank accounts, lovers, children; even entire fucking families. I wouldn't be surprised if there were some red flags, such as him talking about finding "younger people" attractive, liking questionable art/stories, being into ageplay roleplay-type shit; but most people shrug that off as purely hypothetical or a simple misunderstanding. This is often not helped by the partner themselves reasserting that this is the case; it's a common but dangerous assumption that simply because someone is upfront about one aspect of their sex life, that means that they're being upfront about all other aspects.
Most partners-- hell most
people-- prefer to live and let live for the sake of avoiding conflict, oftentimes because they are in denial. For people who grew up in abusive families this sort of behavior is ingrained from an early age; some people get wise and get out, but more will just try to mind their own business and not challenge their partner's "quirks" or "interests" or "insights", especially if leaving isn't safe for financial or other reasons, and will simply content themselves that since they aren't seeing the assaults happen then it's probably just all talk.
But that, of course, is assuming that he
did provide any red flags. Some weirdos are sneaky enough to know that outing themselves to their partner is a bad idea, and will go to extreme lengths to ensure that they are not likely to find out. If their partner is staunchly against such fetishes and they pretend to agree with those sentiments, then they know that they can use their partner as a shield for a false sense of credibility to back them up. We've seen serial killers do this, and some of them still have/had partners who were willing to defend them because "he was never like that around me!" even after the trial proved them unquestionably guilty, because they cannot connect the fact that their partner had a double life or that their good treatment towards their spouse is
exclusive to their spouse.
It seems doubtful that any furry would be able to keep their online and offline lives separate like this, but we know from the Discord IRL Vore Fetishists (what a mouthful) that at least one of them had a partner who was completely unaware that he liked to eat live animals and shit out their remains for fun. A marriage certificate doesn't give you a telepathic link into someone else's brain, and although you might share most of your life with your spouse that does not mean you are likely to be there with them ever second of every day.
It's easier for people to believe the lie that their partner loves them for being who they are, and not the truth that their partner loves them because they're gullible and is enabling them through complacency.
Edit: To GlitchedPuppet or Kab or any partners of pedophiles/dogfuckers/abusers who might get forwarded this by asspatters to regurgitate as sympathy fuel; this post is not for you. Anyone who goes as far as to draw kiddie/beast porn for their child abusing/dog abusing spouse is probably also a child/dog abuser by proxy. You aren't just complicit; you're aiding and abetting.