Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Cr1ms0n_&_C10v3r]

Jack has blessed us for yet another chili recipe. Being the soyboy he is, it is Disney themed and, being the incompetent boob he is, it is terrible. God help us all.

Edit:

Lol the amount of butthurt when he sees his finished product:
"Yeah, this looks like my chilis...people say, 'you're chilis look like soup'! Yeah, it's Walt Disney's soup...no its chili".

As for the chili itself I can't really say. He literally admits to taking it off a blog, so IDK. I think he undercooked the meat and didn't really sautee the veggies, but at this point it's a Jack given.

Jack stalls and slurs like someone half drunk at the start of this one. Maybe the predicted Father's Day stroke was optimistic but he's not far off from another. Let's say Independence Day?

this was an absolute snoozefest. jack claims he wasn't having any but i guarantee he dug right in once the camera went off

"Oh my gosh, it's literally rolled ice cream. Hey! That's why they call it that." - Genius Jack

 

[Comma]

[ARCHIVE][720p] Crave Rolled Ice Cream Hendersonville, TN (Cooking With Jack Show - June 24, 2020)

I like how the video quality fluctuates wildly, from pretty crisp to something that literally looks like 144p, throughout this boring as fuck video. Mister "TechTime" must have fucked up somewhere during editing.

 

[Aaway]

i really don't want jack to die but i want him to get infected with covid so fucking bad just so we can go back and laugh at all the shit he's said about masks and social distancing

 

[GoodFattyDeadFatty]

[ARCHIVE][720p] Crave Rolled Ice Cream Hendersonville, TN (Cooking With Jack Show - June 24, 2020)

View attachment 1403957
















I like how the video quality fluctuates wildly, from pretty crisp to something that literally looks like 144p, throughout this boring as fuck video. Mister "TechTime" must have fucked up somewhere during editing.

View attachment 1403973 View attachment 1403974 View attachment 1403975
View attachment 1403976 View attachment 1403977 View attachment 1403978

Why do the Scalfanis always stick their tongues out like that before eating?

 

[Cr1ms0n_&_C10v3r]

Why do the Scalfanis always stick their tongues out like that before eating?

 

[feral cat #6385]

i really don't want jack to die but i want him to get infected with covid so fucking bad just so we can go back and laugh at all the shit he's said about masks and social distancing

Applying Chekhov's law, he has to get it sooner or later.

I don't want him to die either. That would put Pink Chicken and the Lazy Man out of business which would be sad. I just want him further debilitated in some hilarious way. Cooking With Jack would be a lot funnier if he was in an iron lung, hooked to an oxygen tank, or simply had reduced lung function so he talked and moved like J. Shawn Lemoine.

 

[The Wizard]

i really don't want jack to die but i want him to get infected with covid so fucking bad just so we can go back and laugh at all the shit he's said about masks and social distancing

Remember, this is the guy who thinks that you aren't contagious if you're out in the sun.
If Jack gets covid, I wouldn't be surprised at all if he continued making Jack on the Go videos (only this time with minutes of coughing at the table).
For the safety of people around him, I just hope that it would be enough to render him bedridden until he's relatively clean.

 

[Aaway]

Applying Chekhov's law, he has to get it sooner or later.

I don't want him to die either. That would put Pink Chicken and the Lazy Man out of business which would be sad. I just want him further debilitated in some hilarious way. Cooking With Jack would be a lot funnier if he was in an iron lung, hooked to an oxygen tank, or simply had reduced lung function so he talked and moved like J. Shawn Lemoine.

Remember, this is the guy who thinks that you aren't contagious if you're out in the sun.
If Jack gets covid, I wouldn't be surprised at all if he continued making Jack on the Go videos (only this time with minutes of coughing at the table).
For the safety of people around him, I just hope that it would be enough to render him bedridden until he's relatively clean.

with the luck jack has had when it comes to his health, he'd be one of the asymptomatic carriers

so he'd just end up infecting a ton of others because of his refusal to wear a mask

 

[Tohn Jitor]

with the luck jack has had when it comes to his health, he'd be one of the asymptomatic carriers

so he'd just end up infecting a ton of others because of his refusal to wear a mask

Ideally he would get his entire family sick/quarantined so he couldn't depend on them to help him with his videos. That would be the most entertaining scenario in my view.

 

[feral cat #6385]

with the luck jack has had when it comes to his health, he'd be one of the asymptomatic carriers

so he'd just end up infecting a ton of others because of his refusal to wear a mask

Hmmm.....

True the inner Wendigo might not let jack die. But I bet Tammy and Jack Jr. wouldn't be as lucky. Thus Jack's own carelessness would kill his family.

 

[desudesu]

i really don't want jack to die but i want him to get infected with covid so fucking bad just so we can go back and laugh at all the shit he's said about masks and social distancing

As of this moment, there's 35.5k cases in Tennessee alone. Given the propensity of the Scalfanis to frequent crowded areas and Fat Jack being smug with his anti-mask rhetoric, lack of hygiene and piss poor health outlook, they will probably catch the coof very soon.

Going to start observing him for symptoms after his every post on JOTG, since there's a 2 week incubation period for the virus.

 

[Aaway]

As of this moment, there's 35.5k cases in Tennessee alone. Given the propensity of the Scalfanis to frequent crowded areas and Fat Jack being smug with his anti-mask rhetoric, lack of hygiene and piss poor health outlook, they will probably catch the coof very soon.

Going to start observing him for symptoms after his every post on JOTG, since there's a 2 week incubation period for the virus.

i thought he for sure had it when he said taco seasoning and tumeric were tasteless but i guess that was just due to his tastebuds only being able to taste bbq, bacon, burgers, and fries

 

[A Duck Selling Lemonade]

Not sure how a podcast that "uses" more than two brain cells would be of any use to mushbrain
View attachment 1402624

By "at least two brain cells" he actually means "somebody who thinks for themselves", and by that he means "

i thought he for sure had it when he said taco seasoning and tumeric were tasteless but i guess that was just due to his tastebuds only being able to taste bbq, bacon, burgers, and fries

He did say turmeric had no flavor. He even dumped a whole lot into one of his dump chilies. And it does have a quite strong flavor.

 

[Uncle Meat]

His spices are probably several years old.

 

[feral cat #6385]

i thought he for sure had it when he said taco seasoning and tumeric were tasteless but i guess that was just due to his tastebuds only being able to taste bbq, bacon, burgers, and fries

No that's just an example of evolution. As we saw with the bacon-roll monstrosity redo, Jack has changed a lot through the years. All pretense of "cooking" are all but gone. He has become less human and more animalistic. Animals don't have very refined tastes. Soon his "cooking videos" will consist of a a naked snarling and growling jack ripping at raw chunks of meat with his extending goblin shark like mouth. He is more Wendigo than man now.

 

[Aaway]

look who got another smoker

 

[The Cum Consumer]

look who got another smoker

View attachment 1405989

View attachment 1405990

For someone who follows a religion that preaches asceticism, Jack sure is a massive consoomer. Seriously, what the fuck is a wifi smoker anyways? I don't really see the point of IoT for most things to begin with, but just get up from the couch to turn on your smoker and set a timer. No need for wifi.

 

[salmonellajack]

Why does he make it sound like he was given a free smoker

 

[Adamska]

Why does he make it sound like he was given a free smoker

He's been faking getting "promotions" for a while now; he's just been doubling down on it this year since he's realized his joke of a "career" is dead. Mainly because he's watching his old videos like Al Bundy recalls that one football game.

look who got another smoker

View attachment 1405989View attachment 1405990

You only need one fucking smoker. Maybe two if you also host big parties and need to change up food. Fat Jack just refuses to admit he's a hoarder and glutton.

 

[stupidpieceofshit]

For someone who follows a religion that preaches asceticism, Jack sure is a massive consoomer. Seriously, what the fuck is a wifi smoker anyways? I don't really see the point of IoT for most things to begin with, but just get up from the couch to turn on your smoker and set a timer. No need for wifi.

You have IoT trashcans FFS when we got to that point humanity lost in terms of IoT