Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

[Vivacious]

If I recall correctly before Emily there was artfag. Really fuzzy on the details of that one, another former mod I think.

Has every girl he dated since '99 been involved with SA in some way? What about Megan and Ashley?

 

[AnOminous]

View attachment 1414569

Wow what a fucking retard.

 

[Papa Adolfo's Take'n'Bake]

Found this documentary:

This movie makes you stupid: The Something Awful documentary

In summer of 2004, over 300 goons from the Something Awful forums converged on Las Vegas to eat, drink, and be merry with people they only knew ... from the ...

www.youtube.com

Going to watch the whole thing but apparently LT got the idea for the name while working with Radium and Fragmaster(?) at Gamestop (2:2

Watching this is hilarious even as a newfag about Lowtax's lore to watch him go from dime-a-dozen early aughts weirdo to pill-popping schizoid wife beater. Seems to fit in with the assembled crowd too.

 

[I can't imagine]

So, watching that video of the Dick show - I got a question... Why does Lowtax think acting pathetic and constantly talking about his problems will win people over? If anything, he should just reverse course drastically and be like "Fuck trannies. I'm going to ban them all and then I'm changing my forum to be straight up alt-right with the front page being non-stop pictures of Trump gloriously naked doing squats nonstop with praise on his meaty powerful thrusts."

I mean, this nigga could straight up have a brain tumor and people still wouldn't sympathize with the medical/domestic shit due to the funds going to a GTR and Gold Belly binge.

When you've only got one angle you can work, you work it for all it's worth.

He's too far in to reverse course, he's too pathetic to be taken seriously, and the best defense his e-friends can muster is "women, amiright? hahaha". As useless and ineffective as playing the weak and disabled card might be, it's the only thing that's worked for him in the past, so he's sticking with it.

 

[Dafuqisdis?]

Has every girl he dated since '99 been involved with SA in some way? What about Megan and Ashley?

Ashlii was a forum user. Megan I'm not sure. Everyone referred to her as "Lowtax's asian mail order bride" when the SA forums were funny a bazillion years ago. I have to assume she was familiar with the forums too or else she would have never met Lowtax.

 

[Rotogravure]

The hosts are incredulous that all the Goons have turned on Lowtax. Lowtax says that people secretly support him but don't want to speak out publicly. "Allegations are just allegations. I've talked to people who know her in real life." Lowtax says that Logan has abused an ex in the past who is scared of her. He wishes people had warned him about Logan before Logan came over.

Oh, of course, yes.

 

[Humble Shitpost Merchant]

He wishes people had warned him about Logan before Logan came over.

We tried, multiple times. We also tried to warn Logan about Lowtax. I guess they both had air pods in.

 

[Dog-O-Tron 5000v5.0]

Artfag never officially dated him although I wouldn't be shocked if they fooked around. She was a major GIRL ON THE INTERENT thot a lot of the hungry goons sucked up to along with smoegril. I don't even think she had admin or mod powers but I could be misremembering. She was involved in a lot of the early drama in the 99=00 days with Al, jre, etc when Fistgrrl ended up being the last one standing along with Zach.

A correction to the above stuff about Lowtax's other exes-Ashli's story is funnier than that. Basically there was some chick in Canada who loved SA since she was a young teen (like Bogan). She aspired to be an "Internet Comedy Writer" and wanted to emulate Lowtax's wacky monkey cheese Web 1.0 humor as she thought it was the height of comedy. She talked to him online and invited him to visit....

...and her name was (not) Ashli. She was Ashli's friend, and invited Ashli over to her house and he ended up hooking up with Ashli instead. Ashli was some sort of amateur Canadian model and presumably much hotter than the nerd girl. She ended up coming back with him to the US for some reason.

 

[Sabrina]

Ashlii was a forum user. Megan I'm not sure. Everyone referred to her as "Lowtax's asian mail order bride" when the SA forums were funny a bazillion years ago. I have to assume she was familiar with the forums too or else she would have never met Lowtax.

Ashli was friends with a goon that Lowtax came to "visit" in Canada and ended up bringing her home instead. Later she signed up as LadyAmbien and for a while she posted regularly and tried to help the site in general before getting run out. She wasn't very goony, she was really nice lol

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

So, watching that video of the Dick show - I got a question... Why does Lowtax think acting pathetic and constantly talking about his problems will win people over? If anything, he should just reverse course drastically and be like "Fuck trannies. I'm going to ban them all and then I'm changing my forum to be straight up alt-right with the front page being non-stop pictures of Trump gloriously naked doing squats nonstop with praise on his meaty powerful thrusts."

I mean, this nigga could straight up have a brain tumor and people still wouldn't sympathize with the medical/domestic shit due to the funds going to a GTR and Gold Belly binge.

He’s learned whoever is the most pathetic victim wins from SA lurking the past decade.

 

[All Cops Are Based]

If anything, he should just reverse course drastically and be like "Fuck trannies. I'm going to ban them all and then I'm changing my forum to be straight up alt-right with the front page being non-stop pictures of Trump gloriously naked doing squats nonstop with praise on his meaty powerful thrusts."

That wouldn't be funny to him, Rich is uncomfortable with the vaguely right-leaning atmosphere on KF too. His brand of mostly civil Bush era center-liberalism where "MUCH LIKE THE BIBLE" is a sick own has been left in the dust and isn't really relevant to anybody who's very online these days. And it seems like he's still processing that fact

 

[BobbyBriggs69420]

So, watching that video of the Dick show - I got a question... Why does Lowtax think acting pathetic and constantly talking about his problems will win people over?

Goons since the early 2000s thought girls=cute and helpless, therefore if I = helpless i will be cute to girls. That's a really simple way of breaking it down but there were daily "eek! a spider!" threads and just the general feminized/childish speech all the time, "I enjoyed the yummy deliciousness of my ice cream sammy!" see enough of that type shit with regularity from the same people and you'd get what I'm talking about. Now it's widespread* though so it's pretty well baseline for non-nazi white maabs.

edit: * Widespread as in petabytes of plain ascii text variations of just those 2 sayings on just sa and reddit alone, Rich, your site was an internet-first in so many ways! We can still daily see the influence!

 

[Harbinger of Kali Yuga]

She wasn't very goony, she was really nice lol

Sounds very ungoony then.

 

[northstar747]

He should make it free.

here s the issue with idots like richard

Which if you remember the early days of the internet and MP3's napster etc

MUSIC INDUSTRY: EVERY DOWNLOAD OF MMMBOP IS MONEY LOST FOR THE LABEL!!! REEE REEE REEE

INTERNET: BUT I WASNT GONNA BUY YOUR ALBUM SO YOU CANT TREAT EVERYDOWN LOAD AS A LOST SALE.

SA COMMUNITY: LET MAKE ACCOUNTS FREE TO GROW THE COMMUNITY AND GET A TRAFFIC AND FIND OTHER WAYS TO MONITIZE THE BRAND

LOWTAX: NOO NOO EVERY FREE ACCOUNT SIGN UP IS MONEY THAT COULD GO TO MY SPINE REE REE REEE GOLDBELLY MANGOSTEEN MY DICK.

 

[Goy Sheckelstein]

Has anyone uploaded the dick masterson podcast yet I can't find it.

 

[wreddit]

Has anyone uploaded the dick masterson podcast yet I can't find it.

https://kiwifarms.net/threads/richard-lowtax-kyanka.1222/page-360#post-6809296

That post has it in both the audio and video formats.

 

[Goy Sheckelstein]

https://kiwifarms.net/threads/richard-lowtax-kyanka.1222/page-360#post-6809296

That post has it in both the audio and video formats.

Many thanks.

 

[BobbyBriggs69420]

here s the issue with idots like richard

Which if you remember the early days of the internet and MP3's napster etc

MUSIC INDUSTRY: EVERY DOWNLOAD OF MMMBOP IS MONEY LOST FOR THE LABEL!!! REEE REEE REEE

INTERNET: BUT I WASNT GONNA BUY YOUR ALBUM SO YOU CANT TREAT EVERYDOWN LOAD AS A LOST SALE.

SA COMMUNITY: LET MAKE ACCOUNTS FREE TO GROW THE COMMUNITY AND GET A TRAFFIC AND FIND OTHER WAYS TO MONITIZE THE BRAND

LOWTAX: NOO NOO EVERY FREE ACCOUNT SIGN UP IS MONEY THAT COULD GO TO MY SPINE REE REE REEE GOLDBELLY MANGOSTEEN MY DICK.

OFFSITE SA COMMUNITY 2020: LETS MAKE ACCOUNTS FREE TO WATCH THE HUGBOX GET DESTROYED BY BORED 15 AND 40 YEAR OLDS USING SPICY WORDS, DICKARD, YOU'RE OUT, ITS GONE ANYWAY, WHY NOT DO IT? THEY TOOK BACK THEIR PATREON SUBS, FEELS LIKE A BETRAYAL EH?

 

[White Devil]

Honestly, I'm with the guys who say Lowtax should nuke the mod team, support the site with ads, and open registrations to everyone like NeoGAF. That would be the bigger fuck you to the troons and mod team that hates him as opposed to just nuking it all.

 

[Goy Sheckelstein]

Honestly, I'm with the guys who say Lowtax should nuke the mod team, support the site with ads, and open registrations to everyone like NeoGAF. That would be the bigger fuck you to the troons and mod team that hates him as opposed to just nuking it all.

lowtax needs to make money somehow. He doesn't have a single marketable skill and hasn't had a real job in his life.

If he does nuke the mod team, he should make me an admin.