Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

[Badungus Kabungus]

She was involved in a lot of the early drama in the 99=00 days with Al, jre, etc when Fistgrrl ended up being the last one standing along with Zach.

Thanks, my memory of that was a bit off. Artfag was a contributor, not a mod. Ended up making some nudie videos I recall. Remember jre being super creepy and stalking Trillian? Also I'm like 90% sure he was the one with the botched circumcision, unless I'm thinking of another goon.

 

[White Devil]

lowtax needs to make money somehow. He doesn't have a single marketable skill and hasn't had a real job in his life.

If he does nuke the mod team, he should make me an admin.

His parents are rich and iirc his mother was the county prosecutor where he lives, I have no doubt Lowtax is taken care of regardless of if he gets off his ass or not. SA is his legacy though, more than his children are, and what man would want to give his legacy up to a bunch of screaming mental defectives?

 

[CIA Nigger]

There's still the problem of the userbase though. The troon platoon are comedic poison, but they have a vice-like grip over the site and its moderation. He should honestly just go for a Night of the Long Knives style purge, but who knows if even his patreon bottoming out is gonna be enough motivation for him to finally pull the trigger like people here have been recommending for years.

Lowtax would have to purge the mod/admin team, let only people he chooses (or fuck even some of this site's/some offshoot site's finest users) be a part of the new team, and maybe do like what GAF did and unban a bunch of quality posters too.

But who am I kidding. Lowtax probably downs too much box wine and ambien to give a shit about his dying site and not even his Patreon bottoming out would convince him. The troons on his site already hate his ass and that's why he's banned from Twitter, because they have Twitter connections he lacks. There is literally, I mean literally nothing to lose at this point in time aside from some banned goons whining on Twitter. But watching them whine would be quality entertainment too.

 

[Gender Fluids BLEVE]

How to make $Infinity with the Something Awful forums:
1) Make registration free, either permanently or during regular, specified periods.
2) Everyone gets one free "Home Subforum" assignment; changing your "Home Subforum" in the future costs $5.
3) If you have platinum, you can give someone who has posted in your home sub within the past 30 days a 6 hour probation for any or no reason for $10 dollars.
4) Drown in obscene amounts of money as CSPAM attempts to silence each other and everyone else.

 

[BobbyBriggs69420]

lowtax needs to make money somehow. He doesn't have a single marketable skill and hasn't had a real job in his life.

If he does nuke the mod team, he should make me an admin.

Like others with those attributes he also does not posses future-think, if he tears down the paywall everyone laffs except troons and commies, them=crying, this idea should be presented to him in terms of revenge on those who turned against him rather than money-making, he's surely got some youtube career in the bag anyway.

 

[Humble Shitpost Merchant]

Honestly, I'm with the guys who say Lowtax should nuke the mod team, support the site with ads, and open registrations to everyone like NeoGAF. That would be the bigger fuck you to the troons and mod team that hates him as opposed to just nuking it all.

Lowtax will only make the worst decisions for himself and everyone else, and he will never, ever stop.

 

[wreddit]

Somebody posted a downfall meme:

edit: Thank you, mod, for changing my video from a link to a video

 

[northstar747]

Goons since the early 2000s thought girls=cute and helpless, therefore if I = helpless i will be cute to girls. That's a really simple way of breaking it down but there were daily "eek! a spider!" threads and just the general feminized/childish speech all the time, "I enjoyed the yummy deliciousness of my ice cream sammy!" see enough of that type shit with regularity from the same people and you'd get what I'm talking about. Now it's widespread* though so it's pretty well baseline for non-nazi white maabs.

edit: * Widespread as in petabytes of plain ascii text variations of just those 2 sayings on just sa and reddit alone, Rich, your site was an internet-first in so many ways! We can still daily see the influence!

Fuck i never noticed that. was that the gateway to trooning? i will act more and more like a child then i will become the woman

 

[George Floyd Sneed]

You all also forgot about the Goonette Groupies like elf pr0n who may have been 18 when she met and banged Lowtax. I’m sure Lowtax is hitting up Ren Shaye, Troposphere, and other goonettes.

His parents are rich and iirc his mother was the county prosecutor where he lives, I have no doubt Lowtax is taken care of regardless of if he gets off his ass or not. SA is his legacy though, more than his children are, and what man would want to give his legacy up to a bunch of screaming mental defectives?

This is likely why Richard feels invincible from all this besides his opiate high. Kansas City (and surrounding areas) is a very corrupt city, almost on par with Chicago. Odds are his mother already made a few calls to get this shit straightened out. He may lose his forums but he’ll never face any kind of legal consequences.

 

[Rebel Wilson]

you're the one posting pastebins like they're somehow relevant to the thread, mongoloid

To get back on track: has anybody heard from Logan in regards to Lowtax's appearance on Dick's show?

Shes gone quiet, probably on a severe bender this weekend with whatever friends she had back in SLC, or alternatively crying into her benzo soaked pillow

 

[kiwilurkin]

Thanks, my memory of that was a bit off. Artfag was a contributor, not a mod. Ended up making some nudie videos I recall. Remember jre being super creepy and stalking Trillian? Also I'm like 90% sure he was the one with the botched circumcision, unless I'm thinking of another goon.

You posted a customtitle image in the SA thread, I looked through it a bit:


Dumb red circles are my addition.
I found those titles that artfag had interesting.

 

[Badungus Kabungus]

I found those titles that artfag had interesting.

There was definitely something going on there. Not sure what, but Lowtax definitely got some.

You all also forgot about the Goonette Groupies like elf pr0n who may have been 18 when she met and banged Lowtax.

Now that's a name I haven't heard in a while. Sounds about right, although I don't remember details.

 

[Sir Wesley Tailpipe]

I get the impression there is some bad blood between Rifftrax and Lowtax.

When Mike was asked about Lowtax a while ago, the reply was “We haven’t worked with him for a while now, and don’t really intend to again.”

Coming from Mike, that was pretty much saying “I found out he’s a shitbag, and a pervert, so fuck that piece of shit with a telephone pole, sideways”

 

[CharlesBarkley]

When Mike was asked about Lowtax a while ago, the reply was “We haven’t worked with him for a while now, and don’t really intend to again.”

Coming from Mike, that was pretty much saying “I found out he’s a shitbag, and a pervert, so fuck that piece of shit with a telephone pole, sideways”

Isnt Mike like a conservative Christian as well? I mean, I ain't much of a religious guy, but I assume most people would consider Goldbelly the height of gluttony and waste.

 

[kiwilurkin]

You all also forgot about the Goonette Groupies like elf pr0n who may have been 18 when she met and banged Lowtax.

Wanna know what she looks like?

I posted this sometime ago... in the SA thread, maybe?

http://theinternetlol.com/sa/images/goons/

There's also a GBS folder in there with some classics.

I forget where/how I found that. Someone that's not me should archive the pics.

I'm pretty sure there's some NSFWs in there. I forget, browse with caution.

 

[RapidUnplannedDisassembly]

Isnt Mike like a conservative Christian as well? I mean, I ain't much of a religious guy, but I assume most people would consider Goldbelly the height of gluttony and waste.

Swatting around women doesn't get a pass with conservative Christians unless you're a conservative Christian too.

 

[PTNR 2.0]

I wonder what LT did to make them cut ties with him.

Became irrelevant. A full 1/3 of goons on *his own forums* don't even know who he is anymore or just think he's a random admin because he only sporadically shows up to ban people, let alone Rifftrax's audience who doesn't have a vested reason to know who he is. When he did stuff with Rifftrax, it was, what, 2007 I think? He was already a year or so past his sell-by date then, as SA had started its decline around 2006 or so, let alone 13 years later.

Having Lowtax do a Rifftrax in CURRENT YEAR, A.D. makes about as much sense as Mike Nelson inviting some random person off the street to do one... actually, having Lowtax do one makes less sense, since at least picking a stranger totally at random and having them riff on a movie with the MST3K guys would at least be an amusing, novel concept.

 

[northstar747]

 

[RapidUnplannedDisassembly]

I hadn't peeped Richard's facebook in a couple days. He's just flooding his feed with stupid quips in his hopelessly obsolete form of humor. I can hear all of those posts in that pitchy, whingey, cashed-out dollar-store Patton Oswalt voice of his. My own spine wants to quit after a couple minutes of it.

 

[Cpl. Long Dong Silver]

Maybe it's just me being a 40k sperg but the use of the Emps as his FB pic pisses me the fuck off.

You're almost 40 *Edit 45* and on Facebook taxman, use a real fucking picture of yourself.

Save the gimmick pics for SA or Twitter.

That also reminds me how boomer tier he is for still using FB in the first place.