Containment Random Chris Updates

[The American Hedgehog]

You might be on to something. That Chris, a fast food fan, would choose a real restaurant for lunch.

This is a man who thinks McDonalds is good place to take a girl on a hypothetical first date.

He goes to restaurants sometimes. He took Kacey to Applebee's.

 

[Deadpool]

He goes to restaurants sometimes. He took Kacey to Applebee's.

I believe on of the Catherine dates was also to an Applebee's, and if I'm not mistaken that's where @LoveYouLongTime went with him in the videos of him drinking and singing karaoke as well.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

He goes to restaurants sometimes. He took Kacey to Applebee's.

Applebee's, the fanciest eating in the hillbilly tristate area that isn't refried garbage on par with McDonald's because they have entrees.

 

[Alex Krycek]

Applebee's, the fanciest eating in the hillbilly tristate area that isn't refried garbage on par with McDonald's because they have entrees.

Josh also took him on dates there.

 

[Chrus Chundlur]

I dunno. It all reeks of set-up to me.

Maybellina: ohmigawd I met Chris-Chan and he had rainbow hair and demanded that we take him to a pricier restaurant and all he did was sing tunelessly and rant about the dimensional merge and then he put his Sonichu medallion on me and said something creepy by the way my ex definitely took a photo of this but I don't want anything more to do with him

HurtfulTruthLevel: hey your ex wasn't this w e e n who set up that livestream with Max the guitar guy was he

Maybellina: OHMIGAWD YES IT IS HIM

Something just doesn't ring true.

Maybe @vikodin wrote that himself as his "ex" as part of some master plan to convince his friends us that he's not a virgin.

I mean, look at him and the way he carries himself on that video, he exudes this kind of lame, fake-ass "confidence" straight from some pickup artist manual for desperate, unsexed fuckups. Maybe he thinks that by piggybacking on Chris infamy he can at least score some annoying obnoxious Kacey-like fatty, like Liquid Chris did.

 

[Vampirella]

I dunno. It all reeks of set-up to me.

Maybellina: ohmigawd I met Chris-Chan and he had rainbow hair and demanded that we take him to a pricier restaurant and all he did was sing tunelessly and rant about the dimensional merge and then he put his Sonichu medallion on me and said something creepy by the way my ex definitely took a photo of this but I don't want anything more to do with him

HurtfulTruthLevel: hey your ex wasn't this w e e n who set up that livestream with Max the guitar guy was he

Maybellina: OHMIGAWD YES IT IS HIM

Something just doesn't ring true.

I'm going to have to agree. First it's Reddit and I take any story on Reddit with a grain of salt especially without any pics for evidence. And second if this is @vikodin's ex and he did have the pic, he just seems like the type that would have posted it for bragging rights. At least before he went and DFE after that shitty live stream.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

I dunno. It all reeks of set-up to me.

Maybellina: ohmigawd I met Chris-Chan and he had rainbow hair and demanded that we take him to a pricier restaurant and all he did was sing tunelessly and rant about the dimensional merge and then he put his Sonichu medallion on me and said something creepy by the way my ex definitely took a photo of this but I don't want anything more to do with him

HurtfulTruthLevel: hey your ex wasn't this w e e n who set up that livestream with Max the guitar guy was he

Maybellina: OHMIGAWD YES IT IS HIM

Something just doesn't ring true.

I don't understand what she expected from meeting Chris. It's no secret how he acts. Sounds like Chris conned them into only meeting up if they'd buy dinner. Funny how Chris, who is not smart by any means, is still able to con dumbasses

 

[Cardboard Box Mountain]

I don't understand what she expected from meeting Chris. It's no secret how he acts. Sounds like Chris conned them into only meeting up if they'd buy dinner. Funny how Chris, who is not smart by any means, is still able to con dumbasses

People somehow think that disabled = innocent. No, Chris is a greedy fuck. Never forget that.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

People somehow think that disabled = innocent. No, Chris is a greedy fuck. Never forget that.

And a disgusting pervert.

 

[Tiger Tanaka]

People somehow think that disabled = innocent. No, Chris is a greedy fuck. Never forget that.

I learned this the hard way. Indeed, the Autist is sly. His intellect is no higher than a child crying in the toy aisle, but he knows how to bend facts and get sympathy. I've heard tales that Barb puts on the dementia too, and you can hear her talking normally in the background of some videos. Seems the apple doesn't fall far from the zapbud.

 

[Nurse Ratchet]

I don't give a shit if that missive is real or not, it makes me physically ill to think that you'd even make some shit up where you allowed him to drape you with that reeking, greasy, sweated-on hunk of play-doh that he never takes off.

This story (fact or fable) is only acceptable if it says "he tried, I trickshotted him right in one of his throats, then took a Crying Game Shower."

 

[Mr. 0]

People somehow think that disabled = innocent. No, Chris is a greedy fuck. Never forget that.

And a disgusting pervert.

And fat

 

[Mr. Manchester]

I learned this the hard way. Indeed, the Autist is sly. His intellect is no higher than a child crying in the toy aisle, but he knows how to bend facts and get sympathy. I've heard tales that Barb puts on the dementia too, and you can hear her talking normally in the background of some videos. Seems the apple doesn't fall far from the zapbud.

That's what makes the Cole emails so funny.

Cole Smithey E-mails - CWCki

sonichu.com

They're both trying to manipulate each other. Cole is trying to manipulate him into bothering Barb about his real dad, and Chris is trying to manipulate him into voting for his video contest. It's amazing because both of them are incapable of an ounce of sympathy for the other. Chris does not give two fucks about Cole's sob story about his family and just ignores it and Cole sees no problem with mixing his very retarded brother up in his business.

That kind of shit is a gift from Barb Chandler herself.

 

[Exceptional Chimp]

That's what makes the Cole emails so funny.

Cole Smithey E-mails - CWCki

sonichu.com

They're both trying to manipulate each other. Cole is trying to manipulate him into bothering Barb about his real dad, and Chris is trying to manipulate him into voting for his video contest. It's amazing because both of them are incapable of an ounce of sympathy for the other. Chris does not give two fucks about Cole's sob story about his family and just ignores it and Cole sees no problem with mixing his very retarded brother up in his business.

That kind of shit is a gift from Barb Chandler herself.

It's almost as if Barb is the patron saint of Kiwi Farms! If it weren't for her little autist would this site even exist?

 

[Strange Wilderness]

Applebee's, the fanciest eating in the hillbilly tristate area that isn't refried garbage on par with McDonald's because they have entrees.

Makes you wonder what is Chris's idea of a fancy dinner or classy restaurant. Due to his limited worldview Applebees might saddly be the high-end of the dinning world to him. And judging from his honeymoon dinner in the one comic what would be an ordinary weekday dinner for most people is the meal of a lifetime to Chris.

That's what makes the Cole emails so funny.

Cole Smithey E-mails - CWCki

sonichu.com

They're both trying to manipulate each other. Cole is trying to manipulate him into bothering Barb about his real dad, and Chris is trying to manipulate him into voting for his video contest. It's amazing because both of them are incapable of an ounce of sympathy for the other. Chris does not give two fucks about Cole's sob story about his family and just ignores it and Cole sees no problem with mixing his very retarded brother up in his business.

That kind of shit is a gift from Barb Chandler herself.

At least Cole has a sympathetic goal; finding out who his real father is due to his abusive whore mother lying to him. Chris wants Cole to vote for his video so he can win a contest in the hopes of having sex with his best friend who thought he was a creep. Both brothers are total fuck-ups and laughingstocks but Cole will always come out ahead in a comparison between the two just because Chris is that messed up.

 

[AnOminous]

Both brothers are total fuck-ups and laughingstocks but Cole will always come out ahead in a comparison between the two just because Chris is that messed up.

Cole is an absolutely unmitigated asshole with no excuse whatsoever for being such an utter cunt. Chris has at least a partial excuse.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

At least Cole has a sympathetic goal; finding out who his real father is due to his abusive whore mother lying to him. Chris wants Cole to vote for his video so he can win a contest in the hopes of having sex with his best friend who thought he was a creep. Both brothers are total fuck-ups and laughingstocks but Cole will always come out ahead in a comparison between the two just because Chris is that messed up.

That's all well and good, but Cole already figured that out. He just wanted to shame Barb into telling his retarded brother what he found out.

Because Cole is the smartest film critic who's my real dad detective on earth, and as we all know, only the smartest people compare themselves to Chris to prove it.

 

[NoodleFucker3000]

Maybe @vikodin wrote that himself as his "ex" as part of some master plan to convince his friends us that he's not a virgin.

I mean, look at him and the way he carries himself on that video, he exudes this kind of lame, fake-ass "confidence" straight from some pickup artist manual for desperate, unsexed fuckups. Maybe he thinks that by piggybacking on Chris infamy he can at least score some annoying obnoxious Kacey-like fatty, like Liquid Chris did.

Ngl that's what I thought. Also check out her "post history" shit smells fisher thsn barbs vagina.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

Cole is an absolutely unmitigated asshole with no excuse whatsoever for being such an utter cunt. Chris has at least a partial excuse.

I don't know. Your mother lying about your father, being an utterly unstable whore, then favoring her walking abortion over you would turn a lot of people into terrible dicks. The problem with Chris is his utter lack of self-awareness and flagrant narcissism.
Chris and Cole remind me of Frank Grimes & Homer Simpson, if Homer Simpson were an unrepentant asshole.

 

[Meredith Swift]

That's what makes the Cole emails so funny.

Cole Smithey E-mails - CWCki

sonichu.com

They're both trying to manipulate each other. Cole is trying to manipulate him into bothering Barb about his real dad, and Chris is trying to manipulate him into voting for his video contest. It's amazing because both of them are incapable of an ounce of sympathy for the other. Chris does not give two fucks about Cole's sob story about his family and just ignores it and Cole sees no problem with mixing his very retarded brother up in his business.

That kind of shit is a gift from Barb Chandler herself.

Notice how he refers to Barb as "Mama" in those emails?
If only he knew what was to come 13 years hence...