Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[Creep3r]

In terms of novels, the Bantam Spectra era of books were mostly standalone with only a few trilogies here and there, making it easier to get into without having to have read anything prior. While the Del Rey era that came after was far more interconnected and overarching.



Also in relation to my last post, here's the moment from the 1994 comic where 3PO lost his original leg which was eventually replaced with the silver one.

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In Disney's shitty nuCanon, it only mentions that 3PO simply had his leg replaced without much else. He's also listed in DisneyCanon as having been with Bail Organa for 19 years despite that Antilles was given charge of the droids at the end of III only to subsequently lose them in a sabacc game and reunite with them years later, but now they were just with Bail serving as butlers for 19 years, and occasionally Disney references the contrary. Disney is very indecisive on everything it seems.

And to add to my previous post, 3PO and R2 in Disney canon are listed as having directly worked under Leia's father on Alderaan and no one else for 19 years and having gone with him to the senate and done political missions for him, even in shit like RO, yet they never met his daughter throughout all that time of 19 years of working with her father despite having had no memory wipes during that time in Disney canon. Meanwhile in old canon 3PO wasn't even familiar with the Organas, only Antilles and his gallery of many masters. And this gets more inconsistent because Disney's recanonized a few of 3PO's former masters from the Droids cartoon, yet nufans still expect me to believe shit is more consistent than its ever been solely because "Ahsoka, such a major player, has her fate finally revealed!" or "Shut up! Mandalorian is amazing!" That's pretty much all they have now. Mandalorian at this point is just a well polished but scratched coin on a mountain of turds.

On the topic of Zahn and clones I think people over exaggerate Luuke. He’s only in like one chapter near the end of the third book and has a pretty minimal impact on both the trilogy and the rest of the EU. The name is fucking gay but I understand that Zahn felt writing “the clone of Luke did x” would get pretty repetitive.

Pretty much. I never took the additional "u" as a sign of the character's literal name, just an easy way for the reader to distinguish between the two versions of Luke without giving it some corny supervillain name like Evil Luke, Clone Luke or Shadow Luke. Admittedly a better alternative would've been to simply name him "Luke (clone)" but even then that's questionable I guess. I often see people mostly shit on him because he frequently appears in "top ten worst SW moments" with every description always saying he has a goofy name and not much else, despite that his overall presence is brief and adds an interesting moment for Luke where he has to face a shadow of himself, not like the one Dagobah, but a physical reality of what would've happened if he sided with the Empire. Its much like how said lists always get assmad over the Skippy the Jedi Droid despite him being from a parody that is outright said to just be a bogus story as told by a holovid dealer in the comic's introduction.

Anyway, what would've been the best option? What name would've best suited the clone? Any consensus on here?

 

[Zbk3VmLfujjzjxBd43tL]

You say that but C'baoth was original gonna be an evil clone of Obi-Wan.
I'm glad they convinced Zahn to drop that idea cause that could have been dumbest thing in the EU.

I think an evil clone of Obi-Wan could work, showing how Luke has moved past relying on Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan (Obii-Wan, Kennobi, whatever) would be there to tempt Luke to the Dark Side by promising him to fully train him. Some sort of ysalamiri/whatever shit could block the real Obi-Wan Force Ghost from warning Luke, or perhaps the real Obi-Wan would consider it an important test for him.

Of course, it wouldn't be a suitable replacement for C'baoth.

 

[5t3n0g0ph3r]

You raise another issue, ie droids. Are C-3PO and R2D2 slaves?

In the very first Star Wars movie, they are captured, sold, and fitted with restraining bolts.
You tell me.

 

[XYZpdq]

I think the Force-resistant ferrets is more of a goofy thing than Luuke or Obi-Wan Clonobi

 

[jspit]

In the very first Star Wars movie, they are captured, sold, and fitted with restraining bolts.
You tell me.

That's not an answer.

I think an evil clone of Obi-Wan could work, showing how Luke has moved past relying on Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan (Obii-Wan, Kennobi, whatever) would be there to tempt Luke to the Dark Side by promising him to fully train him. Some sort of ysalamiri/whatever shit could block the real Obi-Wan Force Ghost from warning Luke, or perhaps the real Obi-Wan would consider it an important test for him.

Of course, it wouldn't be a suitable replacement for C'baoth.

It would have been something else, though at the beginning Zahn writes Kenobi out as a mentor.

Luke fighting a deranged genetic duplicate of himself was always a cool concept in my mind. It was made even cooler when it got official art representation in the 90's comic adaptation and the 2012 Reader's Companion:

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The artwork at DH was always all over the place. I would've liked it better if they stuck with one artist for the Thrawn saga.

 

[HeyYou]

I often see people mostly shit on him because he frequently appears in "top ten worst SW moments" with every description always saying he has a goofy name and not much else, despite that his overall presence is brief and adds an interesting moment for Luke where he has to face a shadow of himself, not like the one Dagobah, but a physical reality of what would've happened if he sided with the Empire. Its much like how said lists always get assmad over the Skippy the Jedi Droid despite him being from a parody that is outright said to just be a bogus story as told by a holovid dealer in the comic's introduction.

I think most people's problem with it is that it comes out of left field. "I stole your hand, cloned a duplicate of you, and now you have to fight him, Luke!" Then he dies a few pages later. If there was more build up or if he appeared earlier trying to fool Leia and Han or something it probably wouldn't be as contentious. It is definitely a better way to bring back Anakin's lightsaber than in Disney canon, though.

 

[XYZpdq]

if I really want to get butthurt over the old thrawn books I would lean a lot more towards the spy ending up being the damn tree

 

[Mississippi Motorboater]

Gotta love how all these Top 10 Worst Expanded Universe Lists have mysteriously dropped Palpatine's Resurrection. I wonder what might've changed that.

Also, fuck the Disney Drones giving "Luuke" shit....you like a canon where characters are named things like "Therm Scissor-Punch" and "Babu Frik." You people don't have a fucking leg to stand on.

That last one is a nice piece of art. One of the rare high end ones the early days of the Bantam era never really got much.

The old Bantam Era story arcs got a lot of nice representation in the Essential Reader's Guide in 2012. Here's a few more for your viewing pleasure:

​

 

[Flexo]

I blinked and got behind again. Has anyone posted these masterpieces?

(He has SOOOOOO many more on his channel.)

 

[Mississippi Motorboater]

I blinked and got behind again. Has anyone posted these masterpieces?

(He has SOOOOOO many more on his channel.)

His rendition of Malak's theme from KOTOR is fucking lit.

 

[Aqua Panda]

So I finally got to Vector Prime in my Legend EU reread I've been doing.

Anyone else thinks Leia kinda comes off a little too bitchy at the start? The way she chews out the Jedi Skidder is just flat out unprofessional and dictatorial. He responded to a friendly vessel being fired upon and waited till the enemy force shot first, yet Leia flat out tells him his personal money will be confiscated to repay any damages. She even cooly drops the line, "my brother will make sure of it." She even berates him for not knowing her really elaborate circuitous plan when there was no way he could have known about it beforehand. The rest of the command crew even goes along with it. It's like they fear her getting upset with them next.

I get Leia could be prickly before but that's quite the action from someone who is no longer chief of state.

It didn't jump out at me back in 2001, but now it really seems off for her.

 

[Creep3r]

So on top of all their stupid announcements, Disney has announced that the next trilogy is still happening and the first one is coming out in 2023. I hope they say Rian is directing it just to see it all blow up in their face again while more realize how out of touch they are. They've turned SW film releases into capeshit-tier film events devoid of uniqueness.

Gotta love how all these Top 10 Worst Expanded Universe Lists have mysteriously dropped Palpatine's Resurrection. I wonder what might've changed that.

Also, fuck the Disney Drones giving "Luuke" shit....you like a canon where characters are named things like "Therm Scissor-Punch" and "Babu Frik." You people don't have a fucking leg to stand on.


The old Bantam Era story arcs got a lot of nice representation in the Essential Reader's Guide in 2012. Here's a few more for your viewing pleasure:

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​

The first and last pics sure take me back.

Though obscure these days, Bollux and Blue Max honestly had a solid chemistry with Han that made them feel like they would've made fine permanent additions to the Falcon's crew. I mean it feels only natural to have at least one droid on a ship that big anyway. FYI Bollux and Blue Max were Han and Chewie's companions during the Han Solo Adventures novels in the 70s and 80s and Bollux even gave his "life" to save Han at one point. They were surprisingly popular despite their brief stint, having cards, fanart, and even fan replica toys back before Disney. Weird thing is that Disney actually made Bollux and his adventures with Han a part of Disney canon shit via a Solo movie tie-in along with Xim the Despot. Overall, the fact that Solo tried to bring back so many old things at the last minute baffled me, I mean they already screwed the pooch to death. Trying to poorly cover up its destroyed asshole and put its old nicer collar back on won't undo the damage. Lucasfilm niggas should've given a damn from the start instead of waiting till the last minute.

Seeing Luke's old Jedi Order is always a bittersweet reminder of his destroyed accomplishments, but oh well.

Its been a long time since I've been reminded of M-TD who was a nice "legacy" for 3PO. FYI M-TD was a small translator droid built by Chewbacca for his newphew, but programmed and mentored ("given life") by 3PO, technically making it 3PO's "son". Little bugger even had his eyes. It was a strange scenario that I found very endearing, especially when M-TD spoke highly of 3PO, like "Ooh 3PO you're truly amazing! One of the most exceptional droids of our time! He knows six million languages compared to my meager 6! My predecessor! My mentor! My Maker!" Like a kid overly proud of his dad. But then the stupid Vong War turned him into molten slag as another needless character death of the NJO saga...

 

[jspit]

So on top of all their stupid announcements, Disney has announced that the next trilogy is still happening and the first one is coming out in 2023. I hope they say Rian is directing it just to see it all blow up in their face again while more realize how out of touch they are. They've turned SW film releases into capeshit-tier film events devoid of uniqueness.

The first and last pics sure take me back.
View attachment 1471664View attachment 1471674View attachment 1471675
Though obscure these days, Bollux and Blue Max honestly had a solid chemistry with Han that made them feel like they would've made fine permanent additions to the Falcon's crew. I mean it feels only natural to have at least one droid on a ship that big anyway. FYI Bollux and Blue Max were Han and Chewie's companions during the Han Solo Adventures novels in the 70s and 80s and Bollux even gave his "life" to save Han at one point. They were surprisingly popular despite their brief stint, having cards, fanart, and even fan replica toys back before Disney. Weird thing is that Disney actually made Bollux and his adventures with Han a part of Disney canon shit via a Solo movie tie-in along with Xim the Despot. Overall, the fact that Solo tried to bring back so many old things at the last minute baffled me, I mean they already screwed the pooch to death. Trying to poorly cover up its destroyed asshole and put its old nicer collar back on won't undo the damage. Lucasfilm niggas should've given a damn from the start instead of waiting till the last minute.

Seeing Luke's old Jedi Order is always a bittersweet reminder of his destroyed accomplishments, but oh well.
View attachment 1471710View attachment 1471720
Its been a long time since I've been reminded of M-TD who was a nice "legacy" for 3PO. FYI M-TD was a small translator droid built by Chewbacca for his newphew, but programmed and mentored ("given life") by 3PO, technically making it 3PO's "son". Little bugger even had his eyes. It was a strange scenario that I found very endearing, especially when M-TD spoke highly of 3PO, like "Ooh 3PO you're truly amazing! One of the most exceptional droids of our time! He knows six million languages compared to my meager 6! My predecessor! My mentor! My Maker!" Like a kid overly proud of his dad. But then the stupid Vong War turned him into molten slag as another needless character death of the NJO saga...

The Vong were an attempt to shake up a stagnant EU. Say what you want, Vision of the Future was right to put an end to the galactic Civil War. It drug on for decades.

Apparently there are Zahn haters here, but I would have preferred the aliens have come from the Unknown Regions. Not immune to the Force or with overwhelming fire power and being subversive. Something like what he's done with the Grisk in his new novels or the Sii-Ruuk in Truce at Bakura. Even a Dark Side Empire in the Unknown Region. The Vong were so Alien and took so long to flesh out. Still. Those later books. Enemy Lines and Force Heretic.

Spoiler: The Empire strikes back!

Pelleon being a badass from a Goddamn tank

 

[Giga_Nigga_28]

On the topic of Zahn and clones I think people over exaggerate Luuke. He’s only in like one chapter near the end of the third book and has a pretty minimal impact on both the trilogy and the rest of the EU. The name is fucking gay but I understand that Zahn felt writing “the clone of Luke did x” would get pretty repetitive.

It comes out of left field in the final act of the book and honestly anyone having Lukes hand after it got severed is just dumb. "I stole your hand" how? it's been five years his hand shouldn't even be salvageable. Plus, it makes you wonder why there aren't any force user clone armies since its apparently super easy to make them.

 

[jspit]

It comes out of left field in the final act of the book and honestly anyone having Lukes hand after it got severed is just dumb. "I stole your hand" how? it's been five years his hand shouldn't even be salvageable. Plus, it makes you wonder why there aren't any force user clone armies since its apparently super easy to make them.

It was explained that Palpatine had it retrieved and stored in his warehouse. Further, growing an army of force sensitive clones would undermine his power and take time, ten years?

 

[Creep3r]

The Vong were an attempt to shake up a stagnant EU. Say what you want, Vision of the Future was right to put an end to the galactic Civil War. It drug on for decades.

I agree, the Civil War had dragged on for way too long with the Empire vs Republic shit, so the Vong were a nice addition to try and bring an end to that much like the Sii-Ruuk. That and NJO was very well written, but I just personally didn't like the over the top damage. I get why they did it, but I still didn't like it. At least just vongnuke all the dozens of unoriginal Coruscant clones only since those would make the most sense as primary targets and it would remove some of the more uninteresting worlds. Some deaths though were impacting and well done (like Chewbacca's) while others just felt uneeded or forced. Overall, still a better 30 years later story than the Disney saga.

Apparently there are Zahn haters here, but I would have preferred the aliens have come from the Unknown Regions. Not immune to the Force or with overwhelming fire power and being subversive. Something like what he's done with the Grisk in his new novels or the Sii-Ruuk in Truce at Bakura. Even a Dark Side Empire in the Unknown Region. The Vong were so Alien and took so long to flesh out. Still. Those later books. Enemy Lines and Force Heretic.

Spoiler: The Empire strikes back!

Pelleon being a badass from a Goddamn tank

I think the Charon sort of fit the bill in that regard. They were essentially the Vong before the Vong. Not as overwhelmingly powerful but still a threat and with the same organic tech theme and having foreign invader typing and I guess somewhat subversive since they didn't believe in the Force or anything, they believed that everything was meant to be erased by any means necessary, and considering that they came from Otherspace, that sort of outlook would make sense for them. Still they were sadly restricted to RPGs and their designs weren't that great for a "major threat" as I doubt the monster-spider look would be considered as iconic as the Vong's skeleton-men look to general audiences. As for Dark Side Empire, I'm not to keen on that. SW needed to stay away from the Republic vs Empire theme for a while longer before it could be fresh again.

It comes out of left field in the final act of the book and honestly anyone having Lukes hand after it got severed is just dumb. "I stole your hand" how? it's been five years his hand shouldn't even be salvageable. Plus, it makes you wonder why there aren't any force user clone armies since its apparently super easy to make them.

It was explained that Palpatine had it retrieved and stored in his warehouse. Further, growing an army of force sensitive clones would undermine his power and take time, ten years?

I still enjoyed it overall but yeah, Zahn definitely should've expanded on the retrieval of it a bit more in the book, but at least unlike with Disney's non-existent explanation for the lightsaber's return (other than JJ's claim that it just fell through Bespin (fucking Gas Giants how do they work?!) and floated through space for 30 years...), it at least got a proper explanation in The Last Command sourcebook that came out after the book where its revealed that the saber with the hand still grasping it was retrieved by a maintenance droid below Cloud City who then handed it over to its Ugnaught owner who then planned to incinerate the hand and sell the saber before Vader arrived on the scene and took both from the Ugnaught and delivered them to the Emperor.

 

[Cactuar King]

I still enjoyed it overall but yeah, Zahn definitely should've expanded on the retrieval of it a bit more in the book, but at least unlike with Disney's non-existent explanation for the lightsaber's return (other than JJ's claim that it just fell through Bespin and floated through space for 30 years..

Fucking what.

 

[Creep3r]

Fucking what.

I'm not joking.

https://mashable.com/2016/05/04/star-wars-hand/

See the ridiculous way Star Wars: The Force Awakens almost opened

On Star Wars Day, Mark Hamill confirmed that Star Wars: The Force Awakens nearly had a different — and arguably not so hot — opening sequence. The intro, detailed by Hamill in an interview with The...

www.theverge.com

Mark Hamill Confirms The Force Awakens Alternate Opening

One of the weirdest and earliest Star Wars rumors has been confirmed, with Mark Hamill explaining the existence of a The Force Awakens alternate opening.

www.slashfilm.com

The lightsaber and hand were going to be just fine and floating through space 30 years later. And JJ does not know how gas giants or anything works. This is relevant to TFA's director commentary where JJ says that its not made with scientists in mind even though it doesn't take a fucking rocket scientist to realize when something is dumb as fuck or just defies basic common sense. Hell a not retarded scenario would've been starting off your movie with a hover droid finding it in one of the lower mining stations on Bespin and then passing it on from hand to hand before being handed to Yellow Yoda.

 

[BobsSpergers]

So apparently Ray Park (Darth Maul) posted a video of his dick getting sucked on Instagram. Rumor is that he did it as revenge on his wife for cheating on him. 2020 too wild.

 

[Creep3r]

So apparently Ray Park (Darth Maul) posted a video of his dick getting sucked on Instagram. Rumor is that he did it as revenge on his wife for cheating on him. 2020 too wild.

Oh shit, you're right.

Up News Info -

upnewsinfo.com

This fucking year I swear. Now everyone will know what Maul's dick looks like.

Edit:

Some people suspect that the Darth Maul depicter in ‘Star Wars’ franchise is hacked, while some others joke that his contract with Disney may be in jeopardy because of this.

If its the latter then this could be a very interesting sign as to just how full of it these new announcements and teases for new SW shows are.