Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[teleméres69]

Lucas caught mrsa last time he was homeless, so it's only a matter of time before he catches it again with how dirty he is

A-Fucking gross
B-That was not caused by being hit by a bat it's a scrape and not really a bad one except for the fact
C-It's dirty and infected

The idiot probably has MRSA again

He really is a lost cause. No matter how much you try to reason with him, nothing gets through. As much as I enjoy Goldaor trolling Lucas, I don't think he realises how much damage he's doing in the long run. Love that he's back to the pay me for questions, except in this case food

So yes, that was me which inspired today's mania rage. Here are the screenshots of the exchange we had, after I left a comment on his last SOFALAW photo offering to chat:

That meme really makes Lucas' dick nose look like a pig snout, which fits Lucas' personality so I'm not surprised he uploaded it

Man I hope he tries to pursue this, could be hilarious and the amount of venom he ends up spewing when it’s explained to him that he has no case will be delightful.

I assumed the whole assault bullshit was him referring to the Suzanne incident , as every now and then he likes to downplay how people get arrested for violence so the domestic abuse charges look better

Fat ass is definitely back peddling. After he explained the difference between "assault" and "assault and battery" he's making it clear he plans to sue for assault. So basically by his own admission he was not attacked. People may have approached him and yelled mean words at him and called him a pedo and made him piss his pants, but he was not actually struck!

 

[mothman96]

I think some of what you intended to type was lost in translation.

As for the 3rd degree assault, someone consulted a crime report site of some sort and found a report of 3rd degree assault next to Jimmy'z on the night in question. It was discussed in SOFALAW.

Would like to see the crime report.

 

[Da Dude123]

When Lucas told the cop about the alleged "assault". Your story is very compelling, Mr. Jackass, I mean, Werner. I'll just type this up on my invisible typewriter.

 

[ThomasAudley]

https://app.leg.wa.gov/RCW/default.aspx?cite=9A.36.031

third degree assault doesn’t cover imminent threats, it’s mostly assault against govt employees or causing actual bodily harm out of criminal negligence with a weapon. Lucas probably witnessed this happening outside Jimmy’z and concocted a story involving himself.

 

[Gas Station Boner Pills]

I'm sure Starbucks, Facebook, Chris Hansen, CloudFlare and who ever else Lucas decides he's suing can settle before anything would go to trial, as if it even would. Chris Hansen could probably get him off his back with a styrofoam tray of old cold shitty bar tacos and some beat up sneakers. Imagine Lucas in a courtroom, lawyer with him or not. I'd love to see him try to go it solo and stand up there in front of the judge trying to explain why he deserves millions of dollars from these bad bad men that said such mean things about him, all of which are true, which is why putting him in a courtroom with the kind of lawyers his targets can afford is like a firing squad.

 

[DeletedSoul]

I'm sure Starbucks, Facebook, Chris Hansen, CloudFlare and who ever else Lucas decides he's suing can settle before anything would go to trial, as if it even would. Chris Hansen could probably get him off his back with a styrofoam tray of old cold shitty bar tacos and some beat up sneakers. Imagine Lucas in a courtroom, lawyer with him or not. I'd love to see him try to go it solo and stand up there in front of the judge trying to explain why he deserves millions of dollars from these bad bad men that said such mean things about him, all of which are true, which is why putting him in a courtroom with the kind of lawyers his targets can afford is like a firing squad.

Honestly, even though I know it'll never get that far, I wonder if Lucas's phone can be subpoenaed as part of the discovery process. And if so, whether an Alex Jones-esque shitshow would ensue.

 

[WonderWino]

Honestly, even though I know it'll never get that far, I wonder if Lucas's phone can be subpoenaed as part of the discovery process. And if so, whether an Alex Jones-esque shitshow would ensue.

This is about as far as it would go for lucas's 'lawyer'

 

[DeletedSoul]

This is about as far as it would go for lucas's 'lawyer'

Oh for sure, I'm just wondering what would be found on Lucas’s phone. How many girls does he try to bully in PMs that we DON'T hear about, for instance?

 

[Fatal Walter]

I like this. Made one very short video he was paid to make = harassed him for months.

Pretty sure he was busy harassing Onision anyway

 

[teleméres69]

Lucas is seriously lucky nobody has ever tried hacking him. Probably has a decent number of messages on Facebook with random women who've blocked him after he got aggressive and demanded pictures or sex from them

Oh for sure, I'm just wondering what would be found on Lucas’s phone. How many girls does he try to bully in PMs that we DON'T hear about, for instance?

 

[Stafford Beer Bong]

So the whole “I am gonna inherit millions from my dad“ gambit has failed, hence Lucas has moved onto the get rich quick scheme of suing someone, anyone to get his unearned millions. His dream of getting his zoomer bae must remain intact no matter what.

He is reaching new levels of delusion lately. Frankly, nothing he has said or posted since coming back from being internet dark has made much sense. Contrived stories of being assaulted mixed with memes that read like complete gibberish... things are progressively becoming unhinged, huh Lucas?

 

[Patchwork Ragdoll]

Please tell me someone got his quickly deleted video were he shows how he'll seduce women, but he has to do it with his eyes closed or guys will get boners or whatever the fuck he was saying.

 

[WonderWino]

Please tell me someone got his quickly deleted video were he shows how he'll seduce women, but he has to do it with his eyes closed or guys will get boners or whatever the fuck he was saying.

I have no idea what video you're referring to but after reading that all I can think of is this:

 

[mothman96]

So the whole “I am gonna inherit millions from my dad“ gambit has failed, hence Lucas has moved onto the get rich quick scheme of suing someone, anyone to get his unearned millions. His dream of getting his zoomer bae must remain intact no matter what.

He is reaching new levels of delusion lately. Frankly, nothing he has said or posted since coming back from being internet dark has made much sense. Contrived stories of being assaulted mixed with memes that read like complete gibberish... things are progressively becoming unhinged, huh Lucas?

Likely figured his dad isn't going to die soon enough for him, so he came up with another plan to become a capitalist millionaire.

 

[Patchwork Ragdoll]

I have no idea what video you're referring to but after reading that all I can think of is this:

It was between the religion is bullshit vid and the people / guillotine vid.
In the vid he explains that he's going to show just how he'd win a girl, but he has to do said demonstration with his eyes closed because he's shy and if his eyes are open guys will get boners. He then closed his eyes and said, "Hey, how's it going?" Or something to that effect. Claims that's all he has to do. Then says this technique won't work for guys under 35 so they shouldn't even try.

 

[Poop Shoot]

No lawyer would touch him without a big fat retainer and we all know how he is with his tugboat.

 

[Wernology]

So yes, that was me which inspired today's mania rage. Here are the screenshots of the exchange we had, after I left a comment on his last SOFALAW photo offering to chat:

I am loving the implication that all you or SOFALAW have to do to placate Beetus the Hutt is send him food.

Also, the nonsense from today:

 

[WonderWino]

No lawyer would touch him without a big fat retainer and we all know how he is with his tugboat.

'......How many pep sticks would it take for you to accept my case? I'll throw in some stale cookies I got from the homeless shelter. How can you say no to that?!'

 

[Patchwork Ragdoll]

It was between the religion is bullshit vid and the people / guillotine vid.
In the vid he explains that he's going to show just how he'd win a girl, but he has to do said demonstration with his eyes closed because he's shy and if his eyes are open guys will get boners. He then closed his eyes and said, "Hey, how's it going?" Or something to that effect. Claims that's all he has to do. Then says this technique won't work for guys under 35 so they shouldn't even try.

The video is still on IG, it's titled "how to approach women", you have to click the little TV icon on his IG profile to get to it. It needs to be archived! @klickitat

EtA: vid thumbnail

 

[PhantomDiploma]

Likely figured his dad isn't going to die soon enough for him, so he came up with another plan to become a capitalist millionaire.

Or daddy Werner finally wrote him out of the will. Posting videos about how you can't wait for pops to croak so you can get his shit sometimes ends like that.