Apple's App Store art is fucking horrendous | Flat art / Alegria / Corporate Memphis - click for feet

[Pissmaster]

If you own an iOS thing and open up the App Store right now, you'll witness some of the worst artwork you've ever seen. I first noticed it earlier this month when I opened up the app store to this screen, which made me laugh because it's inherently ridiculous:



Deathfat? Check. Masks that by no means are medically sound? Check. Different but unrealistic skin tones? Check. Artwork that's leagues below CWC's own work? Check. Well, I hope things get better for Apple, I guess they're really cutting corners where they have to during these trying times. Just how much are they down to, anyway?


...oh.

Then, uh. What the fuck?



And they keep going.


Oh hey, I know that mouth:


And, as promised, feet for your enjoyment:


So I tried searching around for the artist, and, to no surprise, they're uncredited, and trying to search for "app store artist" or "app store cartoonist", of course, just brings up apps, not the artist for the app store itself. So, to whomever did these, kudos to you. You managed to get the world's only multi-trillion dollar corporation to paste your insane scrawls on the front of their marketplace. That's impressive.

 

[Toolbox]

Not the worst of this kind of thing I've seen. I've seen stores adopt god awful 3d playmobil looking art and plaster it everywhere. Companies love just grabbing the most generic art of all time and using it because they think it's as inoffensive as possible.

 

[Thumb Butler]

It's pretty bad. Why are they promoting obesity since all the human are massive?

 

[Celebrate Nite]

>Want to learn a foreign language but find yourself overwhelmed by all the excellent app options out there?
>excellent app options

Also no thanx, I have my own way of learning

 

[Sam Losco]

It's shitty, probably a tranny that did it.

Why didn't you just post this in the Apple thread?

 

[Maskull]

Probably looks the way it does by PR's dictum. Corporate art's now made to be inoffensive to everyone which has turned near all of it into an aesthetic mush offensive to all that are sensible.

 

[Dell Conagher]

Breaking:
Water is wet

 

[Μusk]

>Using Apple products and services
>At all

 

[Coolio55]

There used to be an entire twitter page for this called "humans of flat design" run by a guy called eli schiff.

I recall one specially aggregious piece of apple "art" showing a furry coding a website except all the normal html body stuff was in the head portion of the code lol.

Also, all these designers web or not design everything on a giant scale for no practical reason they all use ladders and scaffolding and shit instead of photoshop or blender or whetever why do they do this?

 

[From The Uncanny Valley]

>when all your hard work breaking into the art world fails yet shit like this is allowed

I hate life.

 

[Pissmaster]

It's shitty, probably a tranny that did it.

Why didn't you just post this in the Apple thread?

The Apple thread's full of people (like me) sperging about their products, while this has more general appeal. I guess this thread could be shifted into a general thread about shitty corporate art.

Plus, it keeps going, and I don't wanna flood the Apple thread with more and more garbage App Store art.

Like this one:

where I can't even tell what the guy behind the countertop is doing

(bonus: J.J. Abrams cited as producing Lost, not Star Wars, hahahahahahaha)

 

[Μusk]

This art is created by bugmen (Soyboys) who are mentally damaged (literally), have limited experience and memories, and are afraid of trying anything bold and "potentially offensive".
These people honestly scare me. They are lifeless drones who follow the mainstream to a horrifying level. They are more finely engrained in capitalism and consumerism that even fucking business owners! I'd be fearful that all it would take is for some blue checkmark to snap their fingers and they'd convert into a mindless killing machine. They are the destroyers of the internet, and their relationship to companies like Apple is a enabler-creative one, where the existing Soys are further indoctrinated and new ones are created by exposure. A constant feedback loop.

Look at those lifeless eyes.
(Oh yea, and their "healthy" lifestyle? Appearance is deceiving. Their bodies are riddled with cumulative poisions and harmful chemicals from industrial equipment and ingredients, "plastic" lifestyles, and their own extremely high levels of hidden stress and anxiety that completely ceases the bodies function to maintain itself fully. PTFE. PFOA. BPA. Microplastics. POSSIBLY 5G from prolonged exposure + proximity. No exercise whatsoever.)

 

[White bubblegum]

So you're mad because the art for a soulless corporation's app store doesn't please your eyes?

 

[Troonos]

Almost as bad as the art style in recent Kroger commercials.

Postmodernism is cancer.

 

[Μusk]

So you're mad because the art for a soulless corporation's app store doesn't please your eyes?

I listed the implications in my post right above yours. The art is horrifying rather than just shitty, because it provides insight.

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

Fuck Apple, I hate that company.
I almost hate the smug user base even more.

 

[whogoesthere]

One of the major downsides of capitalism is that it has a tendency to fucking ruin the soul and spirit of anything it touches. You cannot package and sell great art, so it's worthless. But you can package shitty, disposable media that masks itself as art. Just churn that shit out and who gives a fuck if the west is watching its spirit be raped in front of its eyes. Better to push out 400 episodes of some shitty comedy that trying to find true art and help that grow.

No surprise that not much we produce will ever survive the test of time. In 1000 years shit the Greeks wrote will still be studied and venerated. Think fucking anything on television currently will still be talked about? Think Ann Coulter's latest heap of shit book will grace the same halls as the classics?

This art you hate is just the art we deserve. Disposable, pointless, emotionally vacant art for a people who sold their souls to the machine.

And the worst part about this is any attempt to fix these errors are met with "oh you fucking commie bastard!". One failed system against another. Notice that the west has the lowest level of religion and spirituality, we are in the grave.

 

[From The Uncanny Valley]

This art is created by bugmen (Soyboys) who are mentally damaged (literally), have limited experience and memories, and are afraid of trying anything bold and "potentially offensive".
These people honestly scare me. They are lifeless drones who follow the mainstream to a horrifying level. They are more finely engrained in capitalism and consumerism that even fucking business owners! I'd be fearful that all it would take is for some blue checkmark to snap their fingers and they'd convert into a mindless killing machine. They are the destroyers of the internet, and their relationship to companies like Apple is a enabler-creative one, where the existing Soys are further indoctrinated and new ones are created by exposure. A constant feedback loop.
View attachment 1549651
Look at those lifeless eyes.
(Oh yea, and their "healthy" lifestyle? Appearance is deceiving. Their bodies are riddled with cumulative poisions and harmful chemicals from industrial equipment and ingredients, "plastic" lifestyles, and their own extremely high levels of hidden stress and anxiety that completely ceases the bodies function to maintain itself fully. PTFE. PFOA. BPA. Microplastics. POSSIBLY 5G from prolonged exposure + proximity. No exercise whatsoever.)

Do they literally have down's?

 

[Pissmaster]

So you're mad because the art for a soulless corporation's app store doesn't please your eyes?

You are posting on a forum that was founded by people who laugh at this artwork:

 

[Megaroad 2012]

One of the major downsides of capitalism is that it has a tendency to fucking ruin the soul and spirit of anything it touches. You cannot package and sell great art, so it's worthless. But you can package shitty, disposable media that masks itself as art. Just churn that shit out and who gives a fuck if the west is watching its spirit be raped in front of its eyes. Better to push out 400 episodes of some shitty comedy that trying to find true art and help that grow.

No surprise that not much we produce will ever survive the test of time. In 1000 years shit the Greeks wrote will still be studied and venerated. Think fucking anything on television currently will still be talked about? Think Ann Coulter's latest heap of shit book will grace the same halls as the classics?

This art you hate is just the art we deserve. Disposable, pointless, emotionally vacant art for a people who sold their souls to the machine.

And the worst part about this is any attempt to fix these errors are met with "oh you fucking commie bastard!". One failed system against another. Notice that the west has the lowest level of religion and spirituality, we are in the grave.

While I agree, I also have realized working in the art world that the average person doesn't care or can tell what sucks.

The past year I started intentionally doing a terrible job with some low level quick commissions that I figured I could fuck with without my rep being hurt and my clients still ate that shit up.