šŸ· Ethan Oliver Ralph / TheRalphRetort / Rad Roberts / Jcaesar187 / Rage Pig / "Killstream" / "Tequila Sunrise" - 5'1'' fat alcoholic, owner of a gunt, convicted felon and revenge pornographer, property of the ugly failed tranny pornstar Lucas Roberts. Has quadruple titties.

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Dont know if this has been posted yet or not but Gaydor is already trying to cope with his masters disgrace by Vaush.

gaydor - Copy.png
 
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gran_autismo said:
All joking aside wearing two shirts? That's a premium Trailer Park Thad move right there. He's often seen wearing a $30 metallica tshirt from DXL under a $40 Harbor Bay button-up also from DXL. His little hipster lady jeans are probably bought there too that's $60-80 just to cover his ass. If he wears pants in the house. Then you've got his $10 triple ply woven face mask with the little skulls on it that he wore in the infamous hostage photo!! That's $150 worth of clothes just to keep the man decent for one day (or as many times as he can get away with wearing them before they march themselves to the laundromat)

I mean with the lemon harvest being so slim these days you can't expect him to stay clothed, keep up with his expensive phone habit AND buy ceramic plates. It's inhumane.
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Ralph wears 2 shirts (and often more) to try and hide his disgusting gunt (flaps) and hunch back fat. Reminder than he has a gunt crease
gran_autismo said:
What, you expect artisanal kettle corn chips from a small batch producer to end up on Ralph's plate?
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look if you're gonna be morbidly obese, at least be a gourmand with good taste and cooking ability
Schlomo Silverscreenblatt said:
You people are off track, the sandwich pic was made fun of not because of side of potato chips. It's that he thought that it was a flex. Potato chips are obviously ok to eat on the side with hamburgers/ ez sandwiches, stop trying to jump through hoops convincing that it's ok for you to like it or that it's the next thing to satan himself
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it's not really ok for you to eat chips on the side often. There's no nutritional value.
GameDevAnon said:
Silver Lining:
You can now beat the fuck out of a judge for handing Antifa light sentences and only wind up with a slap on the wrist yourself.
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only if you're black I'm sure. It's probably a prosecutor's discretion kind of thing, and we all know how that goes.
High Tea said:
I said it before and I'll say it again. It's a fine picnic lunch. But it's not something you tweet about when pinterest exists. It's an average, and probably satisfying (if you like that kind of food) meal, but it is not flex worthy at all. People usually tweet either an amazing looking meal or something really unusual or innovative or artistic looking. It makes one wonder how poorly your everyday meal is if that is tweet worthy.

Between him, Fuentes, Ghost, and probably Gloomtube (since I assume there will be riots or hurricane stuff again tonight), I'd be curious if he cracks the top 5

Nora actually did cook for him. There is a post probably hundreds of pages back by now where she made him some kind of pork (edit) and vegetable thing. A proper meal. https://twitter.com/theralphretort/status/1111126836791201792?lang=en
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that (porkchop?) looks disgustingly greasy though and why not roast the broccoli and tomatoes in a tray in the oven for 10-20 mins with a splash of olive oil and pepper? It looks like a very early attempt at learning to cook.
 
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Freedom Gobbler said:
Wait, you mean to tell me that the ultra-chad dunking on that faggot Null is actually a fat neckbeard who had a fat ugly paki waifu on the internet who didnt even make him chicken sandwhiches? What fucking reality is Ethan in where he's a based winner and not a loser?
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Nora not being from the Land of the Free probably doesn't even know that you can get chicken in a can.
No wonder the based ralphamale divorced her and imported a hot 18 year old californian ass.
 
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High Tea said:
I said it before and I'll say it again. It's a fine picnic lunch. But it's not something you tweet about when pinterest exists. It's an average, and probably satisfying (if you like that kind of food) meal, but it is not flex worthy at all. People usually tweet either an amazing looking meal or something really unusual or innovative or artistic looking. It makes one wonder how poorly your everyday meal is if that is tweet worthy.
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That's the thing, it's just like, you may as well be tweeting a picture of a glass of water. I'm still baffled about it.
I can think of three theories for his motives:
1. When his body is capable of digesting solid nonalcoholic food he exclusively eats fast food, gas station slop, and trashburgers, so he thought it was legitimately impressive. Possible, he referred to it as a "recipe" they learned in LA.
2. Faith, having never really had to prepare meals before because she's barely out of high school, was very proud of the "recipe" she had just learned and insisted Ralph share it and he easily bent. Also possible considering he shared that embarrassing deviantart drawing.
3. Ralph was just awkwardly trying to humblebrag that he had a girlfriend.
 
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Disheveled Human said:
The conservative "I am a Trad I swear" Grift is dying. Can't wait to watch all these slimeballs move to the center.
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Noone except their diehard guntguards are going to accept em if they do so. They are all a parody of the human form each in their own way. They all have their own gunt to carry. Seriously the scene is so gay with capos and puppetmasters that give directions and all of em want the same thing and have the same goal, to not get a proper job and make something of themselves. Their content if you can call it that is nothing controversial to anyone that isnt a complete boomer, their takes are as cold as ice and the anons on old /pol/ said them way better. Because they didnt really have something to win or to lose really, these ecelebs are bound to earth effectively because they do have that.
None of em really believe the shit they preach and they dont give a dime about their blood and soil. They just preach to their choir and try to suction as much money as possible from guilible retard paypiggies that get a dopamine high because someone is seemingly alligning with them to a certain one of their beliefs. That acceptance fills em with affirmation joy and happiness and they end up living so much in that dellusion that everything that attacks it is the ultimate evil. Take a look at Rand, thats the best example. He completely tries to cover up anything Gunty does and always has an excuse and cope for all the disasters that Gunty brings to himself. They are feds they are kikes they work for Corey Barnhill. Excuse after excuse after excuse. He always asks the highest burden of proof for anything about Gunty while he applies none to his baseless accusations. The difference between /pol/ and you Rand is that they actually had evidence when calling someone a kike.
 
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All becomes gunt said:
The difference between /pol/ and you Rand is that they actually had evidence when calling someone a kike.
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the other difference is that most anons could parse out schizoposting from reality to varying degrees
Gangster Talk said:
3. Ralph was just awkwardly trying to humblebrag that he had a girlfriend.
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my favorite theory is that he thinks chicken salad is some fancy out of touch health food
 
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Gangster Talk said:
1. When his body is capable of digesting solid nonalcoholic food he exclusively eats fast food, gas station slop, and trashburgers, so he thought it was legitimately impressive. Possible, he referred to it as a "recipe" they learned in LA.
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I have absolutely no doubt that the flex in his mind was that his girlfriend made him a sandwich. You know, like a woman? haha, he made her make him a sandwich. Haha, he has a girl to make him sandwiches! haha! #winning
 
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GameDevAnon said:
How retarded is Ralph to not realize that if you keep buying paper plates, you're going to eventually spend more than actual plates? Or maybe he is just so fucking lazy that he doesn't care about the extra cost as long as he doesn't have to wash dishes.
Keep in mind this is a person who believes that potato chips constitute a legitimate side for a meal.
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Burger Fox said:
I dont think of it as high culture but man, Im guilty as fuck of saying its one of my favorite light meals. The right kinda Jalapeno chips really bring the sandwich together.
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Hell yeah, a nice little sandwich & a handful of chips make for a good light lunch. Add a pickle spear or two & you're golden.
But taking a picture of it to flex on people like it's a four-star meal? Ehh. . .
Haru Okumura said:
It would be a shame if Shannon were forced to include a description of this image in his daily report to Ethan on the contents of this thread.

View attachment 1552527
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Remember when people were measuring viewers using disgraced IBS figures as increments? 500 was "one Donga," 1000 was "one Sargon?"

I move to designate 1k (sorry, "leven hunnert," including viewbots & Chillstream Uncut all one word) as "one Killstream."

Vaush--VAUSH--is bringing in ten Killstreams tonight. :story:

I missed last night's Killstream because I had something come up, but I'll listen in tonight. I can only hope the seething is off the charts.

Ten fucking Killstreams. :story:
 
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High Tea said:
Between him, Fuentes, Ghost, and probably Gloomtube (since I assume there will be riots or hurricane stuff again tonight), I'd be curious if he cracks the top 5
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This is actually a pretty important observation. In the past Dlive was very tolerant of Ralph because he was one of the sites biggest streamers, and banning him would without a doubt lower usership. However, there are quite a few people who consistently have a larger live audience than Ralph does now. I wouldn't be surprised if Dlive is aware of this and will now be less forgiving of a future Ralph fuck up.
 
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Moufang Loop said:
I wouldn't be surprised if Dlive is aware of this and will now be less forgiving of a future Ralph fuck up.
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If dlive goes under where will the Ralph retort go? Any smart startup streaming company knows that having Ralph was a big wig is a literal death sentence to the site. will we just stream on the Ralph retort site?
 
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