DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[Gramh]

Oh I'm not denying the bathroom breaks are to alert a whale it's tip to open their wallet, or that the streak is kept alive through only a few whales.

What I am saying is that if the OnlyIcedCoffee leaks were true (For reminder, they claim 1. that Phil knows which whale will tip and when they will and 2. that Phil only genuinely panicked about the vest streak being in danger once) then I don't see how these bathroom breaks emergency calls could happen. That's not an indictment against the bathroom breaks being whale calls, it's an indictment against the supposed leaks.

Because the leaks claim Phil knows in advance when whales will tip, it makes no sense for him to be messaging his whales for them to tip towards the end of the stream because he would know they will tip and when already at that point - in fact according to the leaks it is the whales who tip to say when they will make it so the streak is hit, so they flat out say this shouldn't be how it works. This means the bathroom break calls could only be an emergency measure when a whale misses that pre-arranged time for tipping, except then the leaks also say Phil has never panicked except once, which would mean that whales haven't actually missed calls except that one time, which contradicts the theory the bathroom breaks are for rallying the whales because the streak is in danger.

The devil is in the details, both Phil knowing who in advance will save the streak and his water bottle waddle can be true. A couple quick ways that this can be true is either Phil is using his water break to reconfirm that his whale will save him (given that it usually happens around about the halfway point on a low tip night) or Phil is using his water break to call in a whale to save the goal which would still be advanced notice of when/where/how the vest streak will be saved that night.

 

[Nixxit]

But the leaks say it is the whales who set the time at which they will save the streak, not Phil - and that they do it by tipping, not direct messages.

I guess you could argue for your first theory that Phil is merely that ecstatic about money he goes to check on the whales before the pre-arranged time is up like some kid on Christmas eve, but I find it more likely the leaks are simply fake. They're too convenient in general, even though Phil did do his weird "Word of forewarning, OnlyIceCoffee, people are quoting you" (What a danger) rant since, but he also nonsensically just lied about the Gamepass thing, so I just chalk it up to him being Phil.

 

[Dizzyuntildeath]

I have to hand the pigroach a little bit of credit, even though it's not so much a conscious action of himself that brings it about. The level of intrigue in the concepts of what is the truth in the world of Dark is so convoluted as to almost be a masterpiece if it were brought to some sort of mystery fiction. It's not just his own lies at play here, there are people who will fabricate stories of their own to cast a positive or negative light on Philip Burnell. You have a field of players big and small all working motives for personal ends, and a situation where there isn't a level that someone won't sink to that keeps those motives going. Every piece of information no matter how minute has as much plausibility logically to be true or false, reality and illusion are perfectly mixed. The only let down to this story will be the ending where none of the mystery is solved and we have an unremarkable end to either DSP himself or his "career" on the internet.

Uh, no, idiot.

The ending will be some unknowable amount of years down the line, he wears hooded robes because you don't have to raise your arms or left your legs to get them on, and looks kind of like Emperor Palpatine, lumpy, hunched over and pale.

The cult will finally have turned on him, slowly pushed over the brink by some heinous action like saying some hentai figure was stupid. A group of Derichs are pounding on the door, howling for blood. "Guys, a bunch of stoopid idiots are at my house trying to say I did something that I TOTALLY DIDN'T DO. These assholes are just buying into the bullshit the detractors illegally post online!"

You can hear the door break down in the background. Shortly after you hear Kat's death scream. Seconds later they're at the door to the office. He pulls out a gun. "Look, I'm gonna be completely honest here folks. I did it to protect my family! Alright?" He puts the gun under his chin and pulls the trigger.

All you can see for a few moments is blood dripping from the ceiling. The door breaks, the group rushes the room. They're beyond anything resembling sanity at this point, they literally start tearing his corpse apart. The king is dead. Long live the king.

 

[SojiroSakura]

He of course had to try and claim that he LOVED King of Fighters. HUGE fan. Y'know, despite never playing any of them on his channel and deliberately skipping KOF14. HUGE fan.

 

[Gramh]

But the leaks say it is the whales who set the time at which they will save the streak, not Phil - and that they do it by tipping, not direct messages.

I guess you could argue for your first theory that Phil is merely that ecstatic about money he goes to check on the whales before the pre-arranged time is up like some kid on Christmas eve, but I find it more likely the leaks are simply fake. They're too convenient in general, even though Phil did do his weird "Word of forewarning, OnlyIceCoffee, people are quoting you" (What a danger) rant since, but he also nonsensically just lied about the Gamepass thing, so I just chalk it up to him being Phil.

Which again can still be true even after being messaged by DSP to come save the streak.

Example:

DSP "Come save my vest streak dood it looks like a slow night!"

Whale "Sure, I'll drop in around 8:45 and clean up what's left of the tips goal, no sweat!"

DSP didn't tell the whale when or how much to tip and DSP will know in advance to the end of the stream he is going to hit his tip goal.

 

[Forbidden Math]

He of course had to try and claim that he LOVED King of Fighters. HUGE fan. Y'know, despite never playing any of them on his channel and deliberately skipping KOF14. HUGE fan.

He would get so bodied playing KoF. He would not be able to handle the rushdown at all. I honestly wonder if he's even played it. If he played it he would hate it.

 

[Nixxit]

Which again can still be true even after being messaged by DSP to come save the streak.

Example:

DSP "Come save my vest streak dood it looks like a slow night!"

Whale "Sure, I'll drop in around 8:45 and clean up what's left of the tips goal, no sweat!"

DSP didn't tell the whale when or how much to tip and DSP will know in advance to the end of the stream he is going to hit his tip goal.

But don't the tips almost always come in right after he returns from the bathroom breaks ? Sounds like you wouldn't give an hour if that hour was always just "2 or 3 minutes from now".

 

[Gramh]

But don't the tips almost always come in right after he returns from the bathroom breaks ? Sounds like you wouldn't give an hour if that hour was always just "2 or 3 minutes from now".

A few do, but it's not standard practice and still doesn't violate either condition.

Edit: A thing to also note in this DSP knows tips will slow down significantly when the vest streak is hit and also I'm sure vaguely aware that he can't subsist on whale tips alone, so he probably encourages later whale tips so he can acquire more tips from his general audience.

 

[Nixxit]

I'd say it's convoluted and skirts technicality enough it pretty much does. Holding my view the leaks are fake on this basis.

 

[Gramh]

I'd say it's convoluted and skirts technicality enough it pretty much does. Holding my view the leaks are fake on this basis.

Welcome to the autistic nightmare that is DSP and his orbiters

 

[Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOinkOink]

You know Phil is a lot like Chadwick. He’s going through so much rough stuff behind the scenes we’ve got no idea about, yet he shows up 6 days a week with a smile on his face to have fun and entertain you all! And fortunately unlike Chadwick Boseman tipping him actually helps out in the long term! So please consider tipping, as it helps him the most right now.

 

[Nixxit]

This is like playing a murder mystery game, but in an asylum for schizophrenics where no-one can be expected to tell the truth and the wrong twitch at the wrong time is a good-enough motive for murder.

 

[Shirō Ishii]

You know Phil is a lot like Chadwick. He’s going through so much rough stuff behind the scenes we’ve got no idea about, yet he shows up 6 days a week with a smile on his face to have fun and entertain you all! And fortunately unlike Chadwick Boseman tipping him actually helps out in the long term! So please consider tipping, as it helps him the most right now.

DSP when typing that tweet

 

[Nixxit]

Has Phil even seen one movie featuring Chadwick ? I'd think the only one he'd be tempted to watch is Black Panther, but Kat' put an embargo on Marvel movies.

 

[PieceofShet]

Has Phil even seen one movie featuring Chadwick ? I'd think the only one he'd be tempted to watch is Black Panther, but Kat' put an embargo on Marvel movies.

It has a black dood in it so i dont think he saw it.

 

[Dizzyuntildeath]

It has a black dood in it so i dont think he saw it.

He watched it, but the whole time he was thinking 'Matt Damon would have nailed this role'

 

[Nicole Eggert]

And tomorrow he'll fire up Paper Mario and see his save file has been deleted. It's just one horrible thing after another.

 

[Nurse Ratchet]

because if he had gotten a real job (lol at the possibility of that) he would have been screwed by covid.

The only thing about him that ever impresses me more that what an absolute unit, faggot, pisscunt, literal retard, & little girl he is, is his beastmode-tier vacuum of self-awareness.

Lol this hapless toolshed just unironically defaults to the assumption that he's employable in any capacity, in any industry, that would've been punched in the nuts by COVID. Lololol I'm die.

Like nigga you'll be lucky if you ever even LARP competence well & long enough to squish through an interview & land your fat ass a paper route.

And even that, he'd fuck up beyond comprehension within your first shift-3 days max & get BTFO'd.

Enjoy the rest of your borrowed time with this mongoloid internet shit while you can, son.... Lol × 1,000.

 

[hector85]

A few do, but it's not standard practice and still doesn't violate either condition.

Edit: A thing to also note in this DSP knows tips will slow down significantly when the vest streak is hit and also I'm sure vaguely aware that he can't subsist on whale tips alone, so he probably encourages later whale tips so he can acquire more tips from his general audience.

its more like the whales come in last minute to drop the remaining amount to hit the tip goal but he'll stall and pretend not to see it incase multiple whales are there, that way if the leader board says 70/100 there is a possibility 2 or 3 people may tip $30 if they see it hasnt been hit. it's happened several times now. also probably the reason he won't ever automate it. the whole "troll names will get me in trouble" thing is just an excuse, he just wants to be able to stall and pretend he doesn't see the tip as he checks the email from paypal.

 

[Gramh]

its more like the whales come in last minute to drop the remaining amount to hit the tip goal but he'll stall and pretend not to see i incase

Yeah this is highlighted when he is comfortable knowing the streak will be saved and he'll stall on the preplanned tip to see if he can milk a few more whales he didn't put in his pocket early, which is where he gets the more hysterical reaction when he gets 2-3 people tipping in excess of $20 to make sure the streak is hit (in the theory he secures his vest streak each night).