What's your favorite random.txt quote?

[Homo Demens]

”Move over 4chan, Kiwi Farms is the new asshole of the web.”

 

[tehpope]

>tfw mom is bribing me with money to leave the house and take the black construction paper off of my windows

 

[Mesh Gear Fox]

"Every time The Kiwi Farms gets caught trying to condemn children to a life of drugs, gangs, drinking, rape, incest, verbal abuse, physical abuse, and a number of other horrors, it promises it'll never do so again"

 

[Doctor Placebo]

"awesome jerking off love your butt, BUT it didn't look clean enough and may not be smoothe enough but sexy none the less loved the vid of yu flabby bely and th brest like packs mm. soo god that cok i'd love o suck"

There's another one that has to be related to this that's shorter and sweeter. Something along the lines of "I'm just here to look at boy tits."

This one is an excellent summary of Kiwi Farms' unique Kiwi Farmsness:
“kiwifarms is better than any television intertainment. where else will i see komaeda/tate langdon kins fake being intersex and threaten to kill their girlfriend in her sleep?“

 

[Bravefart]

”Autigender- A gender which can only be understood in the context of being autistic.”

It just sums all this shit up perfectly.

 

[DrunkenDozing]

"wow fucking k*wi farms is harassing you too god damnnn"

Why they only asterisked one letter is I have to assume this was a tweet or something and didn't want to directly prop up the name or having able to be googled.

 

[World's Smallest Violin]

Nothing will top this one:
”I asked my mother to have sex with me during that horrible year of 2011 out of pure desperation, twice, and once in 2012...Which she should have done. The fact that she didn't shows just how much she cares about me and my frustration. In any normal country she'd be killed for that alone.”

 

[TFT-A9]

Nothing will top this one:
”I asked my mother to have sex with me during that horrible year of 2011 out of pure desperation, twice, and once in 2012...Which she should have done. The fact that she didn't shows just how much she cares about me and my frustration. In any normal country she'd be killed for that alone.”

Yeah Marjan was a peach

He apparently still logs in periodically

 

[Stilgar of Troon]

These are some great examples of why I blocked that element of the page...

 

[Childe]

"Oooh I know who some of the Kiwi trolls are now. Rofl. Glad you decided to out yourselves so easily. Keep trawling for your laughs while you are doing exactly what I want."

 

[Jill Kews]

"ITS A ZEBRA NOT A ZEDBRA JUST LIKE ITS A ZOO NOT A ZEDOO YOU DUMB UK MORON FAGGOT"

This rendered me downright hysterical with laughter, and context induced a smaller second round.

 

[World's Smallest Violin]

Yeah Marjan was a peach

He apparently still logs in periodically

And if he logs in again he's probably watching this thread.

 

[Meat Target]

"Down Syndrome is not a gender".

 

[MistressCaridad]

“I bet he’s smashing up his kitchen right now like a demented autistic ape”

 

[Troonologist PhD]

“Plant your seed inside my greasy pussy.”

 

[Brahma]

”Being a kiwifarmer should be an instant death sentence”

Theyre not wrong

 

[Crustyguy]

"I cried at Disneyland. I can't even masturbate anymore."

 

[Troonologist PhD]

”They gave me a dose for schizophrenia, but I'm not schizo.”

This is a new one for me.

 

[kiwi-identified cow]

"Are you that desperate for people to agree with you that you took it to a stalker forum"

I have a screenshot folder on my phone for these. It's hard to pick a favorite.

 

[From The Uncanny Valley]

"Kiwisawa...they came back"