Donald Trump has tested positive for COVID-19

[Spastic Colon]

You missed his crazy Trump paintings? Dude has made over 60 of them and they're all terrible and insane. Here are 5 of them. Yes, that is a 2 scoops reference.

Spoiler: Paintings somewhat NSFW

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Unironically gives Chris some competition.

I don't get the first one. He should have consulted with his Mexican housekeeper. Shout doesn't contain any bleach.

 

[Pocket Dragoon]

I would be shocked if youtube didn't nix that. They're pure silicon valley. Their employees are at least 40% deranged troons shoving dilators up their buttholes in the office. They'll have a full revolt if they put oranj man on the front page in a positive light.

I dunno... been seeing a lot of full-length educational political adds from Prager University; one featured Sheriff David Clarke in regards to the riots & BLM, but the rest are about political process & constitutional election issues.

Honestly, they're pretty good. I was entirely surprised YouTube allowed them.

But hey, if the money spends, right?

 

[Inventor of the Telephone]

Looks like it's up.

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He's going to make major campaign bank over this.

 

[Cubanodun]

I would be shocked if youtube didn't nix that. They're pure silicon valley. Their employees are at least 40% deranged troons shoving dilators up their buttholes in the office. They'll have a full revolt if they put oranj man on the front page in a positive light.

They must know what is coming so now they let him put adds on Youtube, like the succ they are beginning to see the disaster that is coming so they prefer to have angry troons that can be kicked for no reason that losing revenue, the benjamins talk louder than lunatics

 

[Who dat?]

You know what's sad? I actually like his impression of Biden. The problem is they aren't telling jokes with it. Its just more campaigning for the Democrats...that's it.

If this was old SNL, this election cycle would yield a non-stop cavalcade of insane skits. I actually remember the 2000 election season fondly because SNL hit it out of the park with their skits back then. Heck, the fact that we had a disputed election only made it better because SNL was just delivering gem after gem after gem.

This though...they are just a propaganda tool.

Even better was 1992, when Dana Carvey did Ross Perot. In a pitch-perfect Perot voice, he brought out a chart (Perot's trademark) and said in that little Texas drawl, "Here's my plan. The GNP goes up by 1 percent, I get a billion dollars. It goes up by 3 percent, I get three billion dollars." Was wonderful. Many people don't know this, but Saturday Night Live was once funny.

 

[MrJokerRager]

I would be shocked if youtube didn't nix that. They're pure silicon valley. Their employees are at least 40% deranged troons shoving dilators up their buttholes in the office. They'll have a full revolt if they put oranj man on the front page in a positive light.

It's real, his video shows up first. And it's currently at 72:17 positive likes to dislikes ratio.

 

[murdered meat bag]

View attachment 1639433

We blinked and that kid's like 7 fucking feet tall, now.

wow, that's like 1.5 feet per year.

 

[Who dat?]

The doctors speak: Trump had two blood oxygen drops, was given extra medicine. Had high fever Friday morning and low blood O2 and got oxygen. They are proud to be who they are. President improving. Heart, liver, kidneys all okay. No side effects from trick medicine. Maybe discharge tomorrow.

 

[irishAzoth]

The doctors speak: Trump had two blood oxygen drops, was given extra medicine. Had high fever Friday morning and low blood O2 and got oxygen. They are proud to be who they are. President improving. Heart, liver, kidneys all okay. No side effects from trick medicine. Maybe discharge tomorrow.

Reporters: "bUt WAh aBo0T HiS LuG SkANs"
fucking vermins

 

[Trust Me I Know]

Trump's doctor should have trolled the media and read his answers off a teleprompter.

 

[Bosmadden]

The doctors speak: Trump had two blood oxygen drops, was given extra medicine. Had high fever Friday morning and low blood O2 and got oxygen. They are proud to be who they are. President improving. Heart, liver, kidneys all okay. No side effects from trick medicine. Maybe discharge tomorrow.

From what I gather he caught the coof a week ago and tested positive 3 days ago. He's more than a week in and he's improving.

He's going to be fine.

Two ways he can play this. First that the coof is mostly a nothing burger unless you're old and fat, Trump is both and even then he had the symptoms of a mild flu.

Second that the coof is the Spanish flu on steroids, but he licked it anyway coz MAGA energy.

I think he's going to go for number 1 because it's true and he wants to get the economy open.

 

[X Prime]

Reporters: "bUt WAh aBo0T HiS LuG SkANs"
fucking vermins

What's the next media cope? "We haven't seen the white blood cell counts!"

 

[Trust Me I Know]

Reporters: "bUt WAh aBo0T HiS LuG SkANs"
fucking vermins

Funny how the media will grill Trump's doctor on his health, but God forbid they ask Joe about the medicatios he's taking.

 

[Kane Lives]

Honestly, I wonder if Biden can even survive the coof. But then again, Biden isn't overweight like Trump is, and like the Prez, probably has Lazarus Pits doctors on standby. He does have a history of stroke. Who knows what other co-morbidities might be lurking?

 

[Who dat?]

It is worth remembering: History shows us three times the health of a president was hidden from press and peeps. The first was Woodrow Wilson, who was a vegetable and his wife ran the country. The second was Franklin D. Roosevelt, who was a cripple and later a dying cripple and the press kept that hidden. The third was John F. Kennedy, who had Addison's disease. (And it was due only to a criminal investigation that the country learned that Bill Clinton has a curly dick.) All were Democrats.

 

[Someone Awful]

The doctors speak: Trump had two blood oxygen drops, was given extra medicine. Had high fever Friday morning and low blood O2 and got oxygen. They are proud to be who they are. President improving. Heart, liver, kidneys all okay. No side effects from trick medicine. Maybe discharge tomorrow.

Link / Archive

So I was wrong, Trump did get supplemental oxygen for about an hour late Friday morning. Wasn't this before he left for the Walter Reed Military Medical Center? That said, it's good to hear he is improving as he should be.

My question is, what will happen after Trump gets discharged from the virus? How do they intend to quarantine him in the White House since he will not want to be locked down in his bedroom and how much treatment will he continue to receive until the virus is gone?

 

[Meat Target]

It is worth remembering: History shows us three times the health of a president was hidden from press and peeps. The first was Woodrow Wilson, who was a vegetable and his wife ran the country. The second was Franklin D. Roosevelt, who was a cripple and later a dying cripple and the press hept that hidden. The third was John F. Kennedy, who had Addison's disease. (And it was due only to a criminal investigation that the country learned that Bill Clinton has a curly dick.) All were Democrats.

Wasn't JFK also being given methamphetamine or morphine or something? I seem to recall a tale in which he went to a meeting with Krushchev and couldn't finish due to being too tweaked out.

In regards to Wilson and FDR: those were in the middle of world wars. An ailing president would make excellent propaganda for the enemy, so it makes sense they'd keep that under wraps.

 

[I-chi]

The doctors speak: Trump had two blood oxygen drops, was given extra medicine. Had high fever Friday morning and low blood O2 and got oxygen. They are proud to be who they are. President improving. Heart, liver, kidneys all okay. No side effects from trick medicine. Maybe discharge tomorrow.

Could you post the video or location of that statement for references' sake, by chance? Not shitting on you, just with all the misinformation going around.

If this is true and isn't just saving face, then fantastic news. Either way, best wishes to the big guy making a full recovery. Maybe lay off the cheeseburgers a little for a week after with the dairy. I don't think I can really crack quips, this was - and continues to be - terrifying, but accepting it now is better than denying it and losing your mind if the worst was ever in the cards.

 

[quickthrowaway]

 

[Someone Awful]

Could you post the video or location of that statement for references' sake, by chance? Not shitting on you, just with all the misinformation going around.

If this is true and isn't just saving face, then fantastic news. Either way, best wishes to the big guy making a full recovery. Maybe lay off the cheeseburgers a little for a week after with the dairy. I don't think I can really crack quips, this was - and continues to be - terrifying, but accepting it now is better than denying it and losing your mind if the worst was ever in the cards.

My previous post here had the video, which should be up on the White House channel later today. But for convenience, here's that portion by Bloomberg News (ugh that name). For some reason, I can't upload it here even though I downloaded it from Twitter and all that jazz.

Edit: @quickthrowaway posted it. I'll save an archive immediately.

Edit: Can't post archive of the video on here, it's over 100 MB.