
I know I keep on bringing you posts about my break up but I personally think it would be weird to talk about things not currently happening for me
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Something I’ve made a real effort to do is to take more photos of myself, more selfies, more pictures in general - this is for two reasons. 1. To ensure my camera roll is full of new memories. 2. To try and hold on to some body confidence and ensure my relationship with myself doesn’t wobble. When huge traumatic things happen it can rock not only your confidence and trust in others but also the confidence and trust you have within yourself. I’ve definitely stumbled a little feeling less sure of who I am and with that it would be really easy to transfer the anxiety and stress I feel and project it on to my body. It would be super easy to find control in food because I am stuck in a situation I had no control over. It would be easy to slip back into my eating disorder patterns, it would be easy to slip back into hating my body - so I am prioritising remembering my beauty which may sound vain but it’s keeping me safe.
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I am really lucky that this happened to me as a 28 year old someone who has spent a long time building solid foundations of self care, self love and self worth beneath my feet. While what happened I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy I do know that growth is possible.
@emotionalsupportlady /
@allisonraskin talked on a post recently about post traumatic growth which I had never heard of - it has been helpful to think about that term.
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See I didn’t want my life to be like this. I was engaged, I was happy and I thought I knew who my ex was to his core. Turns out sometimes you just don’t know - and within that radical acceptance there is a freedom if I choose to see it. There is a freedom knowing that sometimes life will unfold in ways in which you can’t control. Live for the moment and find gratuity in the things you love.
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If you feel comfortable I’d love to hear about some life change that hit you unexpectedly that worked out for the better long term (it doesn’t have to be an end of relationship, it could be an end of a job). Anything that tore you open but made your life beautiful in a new way.