Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Maxxicus Callahan]

The Wern's going mainstream, this was just shared by a normie-edgelord facebook friend:

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Bonus horror:

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Luke, you've never had a good BJ because Suzanne, your only sex partner, had a tongue at least twice the width and length of your dick. She had to work with w

My personal theory is that his views on how men and women interact is informed by his youthful interactions with his mother and pornography.

From what I understand, when he was with Suzanne, she pretty much treated him like a child. She was the one who made the money, she was the one who did all the household chores (up to including repairing the fence if I remember it right), hell there are pictures of her shaving him while he sits on the toilet. From what little we know about those years, that sure seems more like a mother/son relationship than a romantic couple.

Then he's absolutely convinced that young people are regularly engaging in group sex. If a man is out with two women, they're going to have a threesome. If a woman is out with a few guys, she's about to get gangbanged. He genuinely believes that your average run of the mill college girl is down to be fisted. He doesn't interact with women with any regularity and I can only assume that he thinks that normal people act like pornstars do when on camera.

Hell, that's what he's looking for too. He's looking for a teenaged mother figure who will provide for him and shoulder all the adult responsibilities who will also be down for some BDSMesque anal torture and fisting. And apparently they're everywhere but he doesn't know where to go find them.

That sums up the Wern’s love quest in a nutshell

 

[Dumpsterfire Enthusiast]

AHAAHA love that smell of desperation.
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..at least it's more than $40 this time but still a far cry from that $1k he was offering a few years ago in an attempt to get someone to go to dinner with him, which also didn't work.

I love how its strategically spread out so the 50s are all fanned right out and the 10s and 20s are all lumped together. Especially with the caption its just comedy gold that he thinks that some girl is gonna see this and want to approach him after thinking he's a real winner

Voidface - “Scientistically” is one of my all time faves.

Reminds me of that guy Fantastic in fallout new vegas who got hired with a theoretical degree in physics to run a power station and goes around sticking forks in power sockets because he is scientistic. Also some of his quotes really sum up Lucas like "I know exactly what im doing, just not what the result will be" or "Apparently 1% efficiency just isn't good enough for some assholes"

 

[VoidFace]

I had one of his videos from last year pop up, and within the first minute or two, he used the term "sciencetiskly" . What the fuck does that even mean?

https://youtu.be/QIJlxxpUqY4

I have an entire playlist of videos which feature him using words he can’t pronounce or doesn’t know.

“Scientistically” is one of my all time faves.

 

[Da Dude123]

Name: Lucas Werner. Scientist without a degree currently researching my super magical sperm, juicy wombs and working towards a PHD in age gap breeding that will save humanity. hobby: designing board games that don't make sense and are unplayable.

ETA:
The comment:

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He will delete this comment and block this person tomorrow morning. Lucas probably has no intention to use this to get housing. He can just stay at a shelter. Plus, think of all the prime rib and steak dinners he can buy! He can spend that money how he wants. He is the one who is using the system and it's his! How dare she give an Lolcow advice!

 

[wenttobermuda]

This is pathetic. He's busy fanning himself with his "mullah." Lucas, you didn't work for that money and it's not really that much. What are you so proud about?
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I enjoy watching Lucas waive around his unearned money. I believe the flatbills call it "flexing."

What a status display. Now all the fecund baes know that Lucas has resources, and is a suitable mate. He's ready to impregnate you, baes.

Show them your credit card, Lucas. The smart pretty interesting girls like credit cards.

Just to throw my two cents in as someone who has interacted with Lucas in public and private for years- Lucas doesn’t forget. Lucas wants you to forget so Lucas manipulates/lies so that you’ll “let it go”. It’s been his MO since I’ve known of him. To think that he’s some harmless dementia patient is folly, he knows what he’s doing and in some ways is very self aware which is why he does his mental gymnastics to make sure you’re never aware of what he is aware of but since the entire internet is aware of what he is, Lucas pretends we are not and continues screaming from his stoop to leave him alone, denying all accusations even with proof, and demands the public at large hand over his child bride and snackies. In Lucas’ mind he’s pulling all the strings. Anyway.

You've seen the elephant.

Lucas is a retard. It is no tall order for a retard to feign bafflement and ignorance. Whether Lucas is a human goldfish or not, he is a helpless retard, and obsessed with using poonaner to prove that he's not.

If his memory is as shot as @klickitat maintains, Lucas must constantly be realizing that he is a fat faggot, only to forget. His cognitive deficits mustn't be allowed to shield him from self knowledge. That's one reason why this thread is so precious.

Personally, I suspect he remembers the embarrassment he's suffered, the negative attention, all of the things he wishes folks would "MOOOOVE ON" from. He's a grievance hoarder, and a collector of slights.

 

[themotherflippin480]

I enjoy watching Lucas waive around his unearned money. I believe the flatbills call it "flexing."

What a status display. Now all the fecund baes know that Lucas has resources, and is a suitable mate. He's ready to impregnate you, baes.

Show them your credit card, Lucas. The smart pretty interesting girls like credit cards.


You've seen the elephant.

Lucas is a retard. It is no tall order for a retard to feign bafflement and ignorance. Whether Lucas is a human goldfish or not, he is a helpless retard, and obsessed with using poonaner to prove that he's not.

If his memory is as shot as @klickitat maintains, Lucas must constantly be realizing that he is a fat faggot, only to forget. His cognitive deficits mustn't be allowed to shield him from self knowledge. That's one reason why this thread is so precious.

Personally, I suspect he remembers the embarrassment he's suffered, the negative attention, all of the things he wishes folks would "MOOOOVE ON" from. He's a grievance hoarder, and a collector of slights.

So is he actually intelligent?

 

[WonderWino]

I think if the Freak saw flyers posted on bulletin boards he would take them down. If someone could print flyers with like you said as many "greatest hits" as possible and give them out to the women across campus, he wouldn't be able to do anything about it.

Ehh as much as I approve of the idea myself, that has to be against some school policy. He could claim its harassment against a mentally ill student and call the cops, and cause a shitstorm for the student doing it. and he has nothing to lose by doing so. He'd get to play victim. Sure, the info would be true but he could accuse the person of deliberately trying to start something, harass him or cause him trouble for the sake of doing so. Nobody wants to be on the wrong end of that at a college regardless of intent. and knowing lucas he'd twist it around in his head and suddenly that person is accused of being klickitat and the person who catfished him to LA and sent him a catfish and it'll turn into a clusterfuck that won't end well for anyone involved

Keep in mind lucas is a student there and the school does have a legal obligation to put a stop to anything resembling harassment to their students, lest they end up on the wrong side of a lawsuit

That said, if someone wants to get him off the campus its better to be more subtle. Such as, say, inviting the class over to a get to know you BBQ. the meal? BBQ catfish and let him hear that and lose his shit in class over it, thinking it was somehow another setup to fuck with him. I suspect blowing his top in class over someone having a catfish BBQ get together would be more than enough to get the word around about him, if not get him booted off campus

So long as it's not your first time receiving aid with a particular school I think they generally release refunds on the first day of the quarter. Can confirm that WA aid refunds have hit bank accounts already.

I don't know how things work in WA exactly, as far as disbursement goes, but when I was in college it always got released to the student within 2 or 3 days of the semester starting, so long as your paperwork was all in order. That delay was just to confirm the person in question was in fact enrolled and attending classes as they were supposed to be. So it could be that he got it already

Just to throw my two cents in as someone who has interacted with Lucas in public and private for years- Lucas doesn’t forget. Lucas wants you to forget so Lucas manipulates/lies so that you’ll “let it go”. It’s been his MO since I’ve known of him. To think that he’s some harmless dementia patient is folly, he knows what he’s doing and in some ways is very self aware which is why he does his mental gymnastics to make sure you’re never aware of what he is aware of but since the entire internet is aware of what he is, Lucas pretends we are not and continues screaming from his stoop to leave him alone, denying all accusations even with proof, and demands the public at large hand over his child bride and snackies. In Lucas’ mind he’s pulling all the strings. Anyway.

In other words he is exactly what I suspected he was - a manipulative predator that plays stupid to try to manipulate people, get info out of them, find out what they really know and think and to get out of things. Lucas pretends to be so forgetful and dementia like. Common sense should tell people that if he really were as forgetful and had such a shitty memory and ability to keep track of things he would have said or done something overtly stupid, forgotten about it and ended up getting himself into serious trouble by now as a result. Yet he is very careful not to cross over blatantly illegal lines most of the time and tries to retcon incidents where he did. Like the burrito incident or the 'I want a 16 year old! they're perfectly legal!' which changed the moment he bothered to actually check a different, more accurate source and realized he was wrong, and suddenly it became 'i've never wanted anyone below 18! the barista was 23!'

Nobody said he was a harmless dementia patient or that he was harmless in general, just that the way he reacts to having his delusions challenged is often what's seen in dementia patients, particularly getting immediately defensive and hostile.

Perhaps. But its also what low IQ liars and manipulators do when they get called on something and get backed into a corner with no out. The best defense is a good offense and all that. He may also be playing manipulative games with you and suspect more than you realize. Lets not forget that while people can manipulate lucas to try to make him think they are something they're not, he can play the game as well, and has an advantage in that others already expect him to be stupid and behave like that. Don't forget lucas has made a career out of manipulating family members, friends, roommates, qualified medical professionals and police and has done it well enough to get away with far more than one should expect from someone who appears to have such a swiss cheese brain. Its always a red flag for being manipulated when you're certain its not happening to you with such people

 

[Iseecovidpeople]

I don’t think Lucas reads the site like the rest of us do, he might skim it.
I’m base going to base that off the fact that he still doesn’t seem to realize that @Jeremiah the Bullfrog was the caller in LA. Even on his FB posts today he’s still saying @klickitat was the one that catfished him and called him.

To be fair, I think if he read this thread with regularity he might actually implode.

 

[Poop Shoot]

Lucas Werner is a fat fucking retard.

Retards can manipulate some people sometimes too. But they’re still retarded.

 

[Fatal Walter]

If Lucas puts up an attraction sign it'd have the same effect as anti-Lucas posters anyway. We'll have to wait and see. And yeah, we might get a bonus Mary Lee Walsh.

 

[Sevan Vosgi]

Even if Lucas read every post here, it wouldn't matter. He listens VERY selectively... as everyone with a female burner IG knows.

ETA: "listens" to include how he processes shit in his swiss cheese brain.

 

[Stafford Beer Bong]

So is he actually intelligent?

No.

 

[Free the Pedos]

It might be safer to encourage him to put up his own attraction sign than to hand out warning flyers.

 

[Gas Station Boner Pills]

This is within like a 2 day span. "Fuck you for doing the things I would do if I wasn't a loser"

 

[AmpleApricots]

There's no point in trying to warn somebody about Lucas, in the worst case it'd get him sympathy, let alone that doing so is lolcow-worthy in itself. All it takes to "be warned" about Lucas is a five minute conversation with the man himself. As long as the ovulator is conscious, it's just not in the cards for him.

 

[Wernology]

I don’t think Lucas reads the site like the rest of us do, he might skim it.
I’m base going to base that off the fact that he still doesn’t seem to realize that @Jeremiah the Bullfrog was the caller in LA. Even on his FB posts today he’s still saying @klickitat was the one that catfished him and called him.

To be fair, I think if he read this thread with regularity he might actually implode.

Lucas brain: "I know someone else admitted to, and gave details of how and why they planned my catfishing, but I already SAID that other guy did it so I'd look totally stupid if I changed that narrative now."

Great job Dr. Wern, you showed us all!

 

[mothman96]

Ehh as much as I approve of the idea myself, that has to be against some school policy. He could claim its harassment against a mentally ill student and call the cops, and cause a shitstorm for the student doing it. and he has nothing to lose by doing so. He'd get to play victim. Sure, the info would be true but he could accuse the person of deliberately trying to start something, harass him or cause him trouble for the sake of doing so. Nobody wants to be on the wrong end of that at a college regardless of intent. and knowing lucas he'd twist it around in his head and suddenly that person is accused of being klickitat and the person who catfished him to LA and sent him a catfish and it'll turn into a clusterfuck that won't end well for anyone involved

Keep in mind lucas is a student there and the school does have a legal obligation to put a stop to anything resembling harassment to their students, lest they end up on the wrong side of a lawsuit

Well, what if his name is left out and just include his description. Warning, stay clear -- man in his early 40's, 6'1" approx 290-300 lbs, huge receding hairline, bald in the back, It would be just enough to raise a red flag that there is someone to watch out for without pointing him out directly.

 

[Stafford Beer Bong]

Well, what if his name is left out and just include his description. Warning, stay clear -- man in his early 40's, 6'1" approx 290-300 lbs, huge receding hairline, bald in the back, It would be just enough to raise a red flag that there is someone to watch out for without pointing him out directly.

I think Lucas must stick out like a sore thumb lumbering around the campus. I’d trust the instincts of the students and faculty there to immediately be wary of him on first sight. He clearly doesn’t belong there.

I am somewhat curious to know how he comes off in the wild though. Does he put out the creep vibe as loudly as he does on his social media? I can imagine if you saw him walking down the sidewalk toward you, you would just know it’s best to cross the street.

 

[mothman96]

I think Lucas must stick out like a sore thumb lumbering around the campus. I’d trust the instincts of the students and faculty there to immediately be wary of him on first sight. He clearly doesn’t belong there.

I am somewhat curious to know how he comes off in the wild though. Does he put out the creep vibe as loudly as he does on his social media? I can imagine if you saw him walking down the sidewalk toward you, you would just know it’s best to cross the street.

It is not unknown to have people his age attending college. His hobo look might be what raises eyebrows. As to how he comes off on campus-- I think he's on his "best" behavior, not wanting to draw attention that he's psycho predator and scare a potential Gen Z breeder away.

ETA:
What will be giving off the creeper vibe is when he is caught eye raping a girl/group of girls. The girl looks up and/or turns in his direction and there he is hungrily staring like the Predator that he is. The Freak calls catching a girls eye as getting a "love buzz".

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/lucas-werner.17234/page-289#post-3899260

 

[Gas Station Boner Pills]

I am somewhat curious to know how he comes off in the wild though. Does he put out the creep vibe as loudly as he does on his social media? I can imagine if you saw him walking down the sidewalk toward you, you would just know it’s best to cross the street.

Have you seen the video of him walking in the streets? He walks with some kind of modified gimp