Cosplay Lori Cerda / Usagi Kou / Lori Lewd / Zero Two / Lori Lune and Kevin Hanft / AdollaSkye / Skye / Krook3dKev - 37-year-old batshit crazy Sailor Moon cosplayer & e-thot with 20 years of drama, 27-year-old simp manchild cosplay martyr fiancé, Momokun's archenemies

[OhGodHowDidThisGetHere]

Unfortunately for Kevin, he fits the aesthetic she wants in a guy, and until she finds her next victim, he's in it for the long haul. Either that or until he finally grows a pair.

It looks like the only pair of anything Kevin has are these iridescent monstrosities. Just look at those ridiculous pockets and pouches. I didn't know Rob Liefeld was pursuing fashion design as a second career.




Our main protagonist Usagi Kou has been busy posting bizarre short videos to entice more simps to subscribe to her OnlyFans. It appears that some of them were directed by David Lynch but, Lori being Lori, failed to credit him for his work.

Spoiler: Some Awful Lori GIFs

I'm working on a Lori & Skinwalking: The Sailor Moon Years - Part 2 post and ran across this prophetic old nugget of joy from FandomWank on LiveJournal:

"You know, I really want to see a wank with her [Lori] in twenty / thirty years. Because a middle-aged woman trying to leech off her friends by pretending to be a cute anime character in a skimpy skirt is just funny." - Anonymous, 2005

 

[Xerxes IX]

"You know, I really want to see a wank with her [Lori] in twenty / thirty years. Because a middle-aged woman trying to leech off her friends by pretending to be a cute anime character in a skimpy skirt is just funny." - Anonymous, 2005

This is especially prophetic after seeing her recent shitty egirl Sailor Moon cosplay.

 

[Miss Misery]

I'm working on a Lori & Skinwalking: The Sailor Moon Years - Part 2 post and ran across this prophetic old nugget of joy from FandomWank on LiveJournal:

"You know, I really want to see a wank with her [Lori] in twenty / thirty years. Because a middle-aged woman trying to leech off her friends by pretending to be a cute anime character in a skimpy skirt is just funny." - Anonymous, 2005

I kind of wish that hadn't been posted by an anon. If it was a named wanker we could have found them and made their day.

 

[12 Inch Taint]

Unfortunately for Kevin, he fits the aesthetic she wants in a guy, and until she finds her next victim, he's in it for the long haul. Either that or until he finally grows a pair.

This is what he wants. There's fucked up men into findom shit and he clearly enjoys it. He likes and wants her to treat him the way she does. The relationship will end when Lori can find another paypig. The other farms had screencaps of a message between her and some random dude. The guy was asking about coming to see her and making sure she was not involved with Kevin any longer. She kept assuring this rando she was not but they would have to meet in a way that kevin would not find out. The rando decided to pump the breaks and went no contact.
He lurks the thread and I have no doubt he saw that; he knows she cheats and he doesn't care. He has less spine than Kyanka. Not new but attaching images of their non stop shitshow facebook fun times. Kevin has wised up and made most stuff friends only.

 

[Red Mask]

Nah, that was Ms. Scribe... or was it the nanny?

There seem to be quite a few bad pennies turning up every once in awhile. Andrew Blake is another one.

 

[Miss Misery]

There seem to be quite a few bad pennies turning up every once in awhile. Andrew Blake is another one.

Oh lordy. VB has been blessedly silent of late, at least according to the thread, but it probably just means she's plotting her next grift.

 

[OhGodHowDidThisGetHere]

I can see it, because she does also have the resemblance of someone who has smoked heavily: dull, sallow skin, the face slightly sunken in.

Any info on what age she started smoking and how much she smokes? I feel like that will probably have an impact on her future, especially health issues.

She's not the worst aged cow out there, but yeah she definitely doesn't look as young as she edits herself and between the smoking and ana shit she's potentially in for some nasty health issues in the future.

There's evidence of Lori smoking since the mid-2000s. Lori also belonged to a LiveJournal community called "cosplay smokers" in 2011. I have no idea if she picked up the habit earlier or currently smokes.




2017

Spoiler: More Lori Smoking Pics

2005-2006


Unknown Date


Unknown Date


2016

---

EDIT: A picture is worth a thousand words. Here's a collage that perfectly portrays the unique dynamics between Kevin and Lori - he attempting to be affectionate and she pretending as if he doesn't exist. Lori can't be even bothered to look at him in any of these photos.

 

[Not me]

Spoiler: Some Awful Lori GIFs

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This is so cringe remembering she is 35. She looks like a bad venus clone. Gorl needs a life. She will definitely never have a real or normal job with an employer. (unless it's a pimp maybe)

 

[The Emperor Skeksis]

Great thread, I've never heard of this one before but she's a real doozy. I guess the lesson is that good parents don't let their socially awkward and weak-willed sons get into cosplay.
Seeing Kevin's emo hairstyle in 2021 is kind of a trip. I thought emo died a long time ago.

 

[OhGodHowDidThisGetHere]

Tiny Updates
- Lori's 5th Lolcow.farm thread: https://lolcow.farm/w/res/119140.html
[ARCHIVED LINK].
- Lori's brand new 6th Lolcow.farm thread: https://lolcow.farm/w/res/132036.html
[ARCHIVED LINK].
- Lori's LinkTree: https://linktr.ee/Klaxosaur
[ARCHIVED LINK]

Great thread, I've never heard of this one before but she's a real doozy. I guess the lesson is that good parents don't let their socially awkward and weak-willed sons get into cosplay.
Seeing Kevin's emo hairstyle in 2021 is kind of a trip. I thought emo died a long time ago.

Hi to you and all Lori newcomers. She has two decades worth of drama and much more batshittery yet to be covered. Hope you enjoy the ride.

This is what he wants. There's fucked up men into findom shit and he clearly enjoys it. He likes and wants her to treat him the way she does. The relationship will end when Lori can find another paypig. The other farms had screencaps of a message between her and some random dude. The guy was asking about coming to see her and making sure she was not involved with Kevin any longer. She kept assuring this rando she was not but they would have to meet in a way that kevin would not find out. The rando decided to pump the breaks and went no contact.
He lurks the thread and I have no doubt he saw that; he knows she cheats and he doesn't care. He has less spine than Kyanka. Not new but attaching images of their non stop shitshow facebook fun times. Kevin has wised up and made most stuff friends only.
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Agreed, Kevin must know about Lori's cheating. I wonder if he's genuinely at peace with it (perhaps even enjoys it?), in denial, or just grins and bears it. Lori's an abuser and the likelihood that she'll ever change for the better is practically nil. Kevin, however, still has a chance to be free, have healthy relationships, and pursue his goals. One of the few things that Lori has not lied about are her "vampire genetics." She leeches off of people until they no longer serve her and doesn't care about her current host's welfare. Kevin's own financial, social, and emotional resources are dwindling and their relationship will undoubtedly unravel to the point where Kevin is disposed of and replaced.

 

[Fictional Character]

I kind of wish that hadn't been posted by an anon. If it was a named wanker we could have found them and made their day.

The Farms and Fandom Wank share the goal of watching dumb people online do dumb and funny things, so there's a chance that person found their way over here. Though with how Fandom Wank was one of the first victims of the "no fun allowed when there's social issues to get angry about" mentality, there's even greater chance they'd get offended.

(Damn, this thread makes me wish for more catchups on old Fandom Wank favorites. Did darkhorseman ever figure out his wife cheated on him? Did he become a brony? What happened to the Snapewives?)

 

[Red Mask]

Yea, I miss Fandom Wank too. At least Wayback Machine got some of it.

 

[12 Inch Taint]

What happened to the Snapewives?)

The usual drama; big name fans negging each other's fanfics, infighting and eventually sperging off devotion to some other character. (One of the snapewives I use to follow starting going apeshit for Majima Goro of the Yakuza series before i lost track of her) They tried to revive it in a facebook group back in 2015 or 16 but it never got more than a half dozen people.

But back to Lori, Kevin lurks any thing related to him and his decrepit bride, so fingers crossed we get a visit soon.

 

[Balthier]

I was scrolling through her Instagram to try to see what she was posting towards the beginning of her timeline and came across this absolute gem. If this isn't the ultimate narcissistic projection of all time then I don't know what is. Does she really have this little self-awareness? Is that part of being a narc? Or is she fucking with people here?

 

[Xerxes IX]

In times like these I wish we had a "Psycho" thread tag. The closest we have is "Trainwreck" but with her extensive history and what she actually does that just doesn't do it.

 

[OhGodHowDidThisGetHere]

In times like these I wish we had a "Psycho" thread tag. The closest we have is "Trainwreck" but with her extensive history and what she actually does that just doesn't do it.

Yeah, Lori is a strange mix of trainwreck, snowflake, and horrorcow with antics ranging from benignly amusing to outright abuse. At the moment, trainwreck and the lunacy symbol seem most appropriate for Lori.

In today's loony news, Lori is begging simps for more money and making toy videos. [LINK]





Would "toy videos" be considered lewd content or is that entering the porn realm? Regardless, it's always fun to see just how hypocritical Lori is and here are some of her old posts. The first quote is especially funny because Lori was banned from several anime conventions in 2006 due to chronic cheating in cosplay competitions.

"you know its sad when cosplayers have to STRIP in order to win an award for a skit... ...sad... if you have a model type body i will still find it icky! >.<" - Lori, 2004

"Yea, more often than not you see girls half clothed or basically wearing bathing suits on Halloween. X_x" - Lori, 2008

Spoiler: Some Examples of Lori's Hypocrisy

 

[Sperghetti]

Spoiler: Some Awful Lori GIFs

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What the fuck is she doing in that last one? Trying to cosplay a hamster?

I was scrolling through her Instagram to try to see what she was posting towards the beginning of her timeline and came across this absolute gem. If this isn't the ultimate narcissistic projection of all time then I don't know what is. Does she really have this little self-awareness? Is that part of being a narc? Or is she fucking with people here?

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I guarantee she unironically believes she’s the “empath” here.

 

[Miss Misery]

Does she really have this little self-awareness? Is that part of being a narc?

Yes.

 

[OhGodHowDidThisGetHere]

I was scrolling through her Instagram to try to see what she was posting towards the beginning of her timeline and came across this absolute gem. If this isn't the ultimate narcissistic projection of all time then I don't know what is. Does she really have this little self-awareness? Is that part of being a narc? Or is she fucking with people here?

View attachment 1848073

I guarantee she unironically believes she’s the “empath” here.

Yes, she absolutely believes she is an "empath." Lori habitually spins narratives to portray herself as the innocent victim and the other party as the sole offender or abuser. This a form of psychological manipulation called D.A.R.V.O. (Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender). Lori historically and currently refuses to acknowledge or take responsibility for her own actions. When she inevitably creates chaos and toxicity in a relationship, she aggressively blames everyone but herself.

Narcissist's Lori's Prayer
That didn't happen.
And if it did, it wasn't that bad.
And if it was, that's not a big deal.
And if it is, that's not my fault.
And if it was, I didn't mean it.
And if I did...
You deserved it.

Does that sound familiar? Here are some more self-victimizing and outrageously hypocritical posts Lori has made on social media over the years:

"Always be kind. You never know what someone is going through." - Lori the Fake Empath

"Do some of your fathers cocaine. It might aid you in your weight loss journey." - Lori the Hypocrite

Spoiler: More of Lori's DARVO Bullshit

"I'm too understanding." - Lori, 2017

"Narcissists have no boundaries. They feel entitled to say whatever they feel is true, and litter their opinions, whether it's rude, hurtful, or not true at all. They will then get angry when you defend yourself and blame you for causing 'drama.'" - Lori

"How I sleep knowing I haven't done anybody wrong cause I'm actually a decent human who's trying to do good in a cold hearted world. " - Lori, 2019

"A healthy relationship is one where two independent people just make a deal that they will help make the other person the best version of themselves." - Lori

"this is why im never anything but casual as fuck with cosplay. 2004 [the Kewl Kou Klub drama she instigated] taught me most people are shit. Like. If you want to see what an actual attack looks like let me dig some up for you from the last 18 years that ive been doing this." - Lori

Lori had the gall to make a Facebook post about helping domestic violence victims while physically, emotionally, and financially abusing her partner Kevin. As a horrifying example of Lori's abuse, she demanded that Kevin self-injure and mutilate his leg in order to prove his "loyalty" and quell her borderline psychotic jealousy of other women.

"I did this in order to stay friends with Jade to prove I didn't like her that way. And she [Lori] never seems to show concern when I get hurt..." - Kevin

Spoiler: NSFW: Kevin's Coerced Self-Injury

 

[Red Mask]

When someone says “most people are shit”, then THEY are the problem. People like Lori will never realize that. She looks skeletal. How’s that for “body shaming”?