Amberlynn Engagagement and Wedding Planning Megathread 1/14/2021 - For all pre-wedding wedding talk

[juicy]

I wonder if Becky can find a graphic tuxedo?

Subtle and subdued for the ceremony:


And a sexy number for the reception:

 

[idon'tknowhatyoumean]

I just want to know if Becky wears one of her tacky snapbacks to her own wedding.

 

[DefCon Dumb]

Sounds like a good time to put a polite call out to our many talented Farm artists... what would you design as a wedding dress for Amber & suitable attire for Becky?

Give it a try, have fun!

 

[Thumb Butler]

Oh we'll get a few videos of wedding catering tasting surely, trust amber to only vlog the food part.

It's important to capture the important moments.

 

[krazy orange cat]

Maybe they can have another fake wedding at the same creek where Norma and Jerry had their fake wedding.

If Amber rolled into the creek it would just be one less bath Becky would have to give her.

 

[C3PBRO]

In the spirit of this announcement I'd like to share some vintage Amberlynn, the video of when she went shopping with her homophobe friend at Party City for wedding stuff. It's also just a nice watch, full of her irritating valleygirl vernacular, sticking her tongue out and touching fucking everything in sight.

Spoiler: archive

I think she will wait until after Destiny and Dana's wedding (and you can bet your ass she will bring up her upcoming wedding throughout that) to plan her own. She will wait for them to set the bar and then attempt to blow it the fuck out with her nigga-rich youtube bux at somewhere super fancy like JC Penney. None of that Party City shit for your gorl. Weddings are a narc's wet dream and she will make it all about herself and be a total bridezilla and it will still turn out to be a trashfire laughing stock of the internet.

I'm also very interested in the role Becky's family will play in this wedding. They're obviously very family-oriented but will they want to touch this with a ten foot pole given the all the other drama that's arisen from their interactions with Amber? There's no way they don't resent Becky choosing Amber over Norma when she was alive, and they'll especially resent watching Amberlynn drop fat stacks on rose gold cutlery or super cute baby pink champagne flutes or whatever other tacky shit she hoards for the ceremony while Norma's titless penniless corpse rots six feet under.

 

[Sparkle Friendo]

This oddly coincides with Nikocado's wedding Mukbang videos... Did our gorls get inspired?

 

[marjoram]

Fat Amy Ramadanadingdong now has competition for ugliest, tackiest engagement ring. yay.

I don't believe any wedding will ever happen. I smell troll. No way Al will EVER allow the Thumb legal access to HER cash. Not gonna happen.

 

[Owlflaps]

I, for one, am going to feel nauseous, when Amber releases the video announcing her engagement, looking smug as all fuck.

"Hay guys, I'm getteen married, y'all!' -flashes dollar store ring-

 

[Meredith Swift]

i'm suprised amber didn't insist on beckeroo proposing *at* d&d's wedding, because she's gotta steal their thunder somehow...

 

[Laygs For Days]

Well, there's an ass for every toilet I always say.

 

[Owlflaps]

I know are massively speculating about her upcoming nuptials but lezbereal:

Amber will not a have wedding ceremony. Any amount of money that detracts from her food budget is a loss she is not willing to take. The hog is an obese, lazy turd who will always take the path of least resistance. She and Thumbster are going to get hitched at the courthouse, have a buffet outing with friends, and do then go home to do the same shit she's always been doing. Which is eating.

 

[8008135]

Subtle and subdued for the ceremony:
View attachment 1847472

And a sexy number for the reception:
View attachment 1847482

There are so many awesome, tasteful formal options for Necky and Density (because, believe it or not, not every chick is into dresses, gay OR straight).

However, no matter what they wear, it will look like absolute fucking shit because of their disgusting morbid obesity. Will they get something tailored to actually fit their middle-aged beer guts or massive spare tires? Nah, fuck that -- squeeze into a sausage casing of a shirt or a pair of pants that barely contains their bulging gunt instead. It's stupid, but it bothers me how little effort it would take to not look like a preteen laughingstock, yet they can't even be assed to do that.

 

[FrownyFace]

View attachment 1847482

I feel this would be a much better fit for Eric to wear as Becky’s best man. Maybe Eric and Ricky will even let them borrow that big stupid “LOVE WINS” banner for their wedding photos backdrop!

I know are massively speculating about her upcoming nuptials but lezbereal:

Amber will not a have wedding ceremony. Any amount of money that detracts from her food budget is a loss she is not willing to take. The hog is an obese, lazy turd who will always take the path of least resistance. She and Thumbster are going to get hitched at the courthouse, have a buffet outing with friends, and do then go home to do the same shit she's always been doing. Which is eating.

Maybe. Or she’ll just have Becky do all the work. But you’re probably right. Dammit, Owlflaps, don’t ruin our fun!

 

[Cosmologic]

given that dana and destiny got engaged so long ago, i’m surprised it took until now. i’m dying to know what kind of chemistry even exists between them for marriage to be seriously considered and talked about. they don’t even seem to share the same basic interests or tastes. i can’t believe this relationship amber manipulated her way into to avoid homelessness has evolved to this point.

predictions: dana and destiny will be bridesmaids for amber, eric and ricky will be bridesmaids for becky. the wedding colors will be something hideous like silver and green. assuming becky would wear a suit to her own wedding is a bit too optimistic. she’s gonna wear a reptar shirt with khakis. you know, something classy. and no matter what amber wears, it won’t fit her and she’ll look like bread baking in an undersized pan.

they should use one of those compilations of amber being a total shit to becky as one of the reception videos tho.

 

[krazy orange cat]

Hopefully one of the wedding gifts is a diving mask and oxygen tank if Becky is to do "clit stuff" for the honeymoon and survive.

 

[mekalekahi]

Torrid has a entire wedding collection

 

[Thomas Paine]

Predicting it now: They'll call the wedding off because one of Necky's newphews gets cancer/dies and they don't think it would be the "right time".

 

[Slappy McGherkin]

Well, they DO seem to have plenty of Goodyear blimp sized wedding dresses out on the Intarwebs. Seems they can hide a lot. And just think, Hamber can wear white because her hymen is intact! Anyways... Blimpo wedding pic 1 and the pic 2 I found interesting because they were both huge blubber butts at their wedding, but PROVE you can lose weight if you have any kind of willpower at all. Before and after shot. Almost difficult to believe it's the same two people, but it is.

 

[Easy Peasy]

Congrats you lazy hicks... I mean crazy kids

mazel or whatever