DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[Forbidden Math]

Hit the tip goal, can't wear the vest. He's too busy.

Edit: It's official, no vest but he hit the goal, he has to leave after this game. Paypigs got googatz. Wow that was a fucking miserable ending to a stream.

Edit 2: He went an hour overtime, after saying repeatedly last match and that he couldn't go overtime.

 

[Zappin’ And Spazzin’]

Bayo has already been mentioned as a good idea for a game wheelchairs could make him play, another recommendation from me is Lollipop Chainsaw. Get on it, wheelchairs, I know you're reading this thread just like your Papa Dave.

I'm amazed people aren't just forcing him to play another Soulsborne game for the twentieth time just to fuck with him. Guess they got tired of Phil just sticking his hook-nose into walkthroughs and the chat for easy solutions

 

[JimiHendrix]

i honestly wish phil's fans would use his own reasoning against him.

"man i really want to play chrono trigger"

"sorry phil, you just beat yakuza 7, we can't do another RPG so soon. play megaman x6"

like that's why phil's excuses are so stupid. he does it to excuse himself from doing things he doesn't want to do, but they're perfectly applicable to the stuff he does want to do as well.

"COD is supposed to be a realistic military shooter"

"ok try playing tarkov"

"no....."

 

[grump]

Bayo has already been mentioned as a good idea for a game wheelchairs could make him play, another recommendation from me is Lollipop Chainsaw. Get on it, wheelchairs, I know you're reading this thread just like your Papa Dave.

I'd be shocked if modern phil would dare to venture within a mile of that game.

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

I'd be shocked if modern phil would dare to venture within a mile of that game.

Yup, that's why I hope the wheelchairs pull something like this off rather than just give him an easy out with a JRPG like Chrono Trigger or some walking simulator like Heavy Rain that's just going to end up with him going through the motions. It is also telling that he's hyping up Chrono Trigger so much. Now I am a bit biased because I dislike most JRPGs, but on the gameplay front Chrono Trigger is yet another EZ mode dime a dozen JRPG, but most of its strengths come from everything else - characters, plot, setting, music, worldbuilding etc. That's what made Chrono Trigger enjoyable to me. I have the same feeling about Yakuza 7. Gameplay-wise I'd actually rather play Dead Souls because 7 is just pathetically easy, simplistic and pure trash for boss fights, but what carried that game for me was the new city, the new characters, their relationships and the plot which were 10/10 top notch, some of the best in the series, if not the best. I do think that Phil unironically likes 7 the most despite falling asleep because the game is pathetically easy, you don't need to worry about pesky things like reaction, timing, learning patterns, learning your own moveset and having skill unlike the brawler Yakuza games, and since it's still a Yakuza game he can easily stall by dicking around doing side khantent.

I know what I'm about to say is absolute lunacy, but I do have faith in the wheelchairs to screw him over now, they're dumb paypigs that are complete masochists but sometimes they grow their spine back and get disgruntled. I mean fuck, just getting DOS2 to win Viewer's Choice is a huge troll in itself and with Phil clearly putting off and stalling to play it they should be pissed off enough to try and seek out games that he'll hate and/or go full puritan clown mode on. Some other recommendations I have for them is games he defended but he'd hate now like Duke Nukem Forever, nowadays he'd go full clown mode puritan on them. Then there's good games that he absolutely hated, example Castlevania: Lords of Shadow because he fucking hated it and as an added bonus it was directed by his worst enemy, Hideo Kojima. Another one I can recommend is bottom of the barrel dreck like Supremacy MMA. He not only hated it, but it's a shitty game too so double the frustration for him and double the fun for us.

 

[Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOinkOink]

Thank you Twitter lol

 

[King of Not Playing Games]

What a textbook Phil restriction for the Viewer's Choice. A "retro" game he hasn't played in the past five years. His previous polls have had restrictions too, right? But this is definitely the most controlling and suppressive.

Also: I just want to point out that if you were, in earnest, trying to suggest something, Phil is actually expecting you to either 1) know with autistic precision exactly which games he played in exactly the range of 10-5 years ago, or 2) go through his terribly organized, named, and categorized Authentic Italian YouTube Archive Of Bullshit and piece together exactly what he has and hasn't played. Unless I'm mistaken I don't think DSP has ever published some master list of every game he's every played.

Either way, more work for the viewers. And either way he hasn't played the game from the last viewer's choice. And either way it's going to be March before his 2020 Retrospective comes out.

 

[blahblahblah678]

He probably put all these restrictions in because Phil would die of a heat stroke if his paypigs decided they wanted to watch him play Ring Fit Adventure.

 

[Prince Lotor]

Phil's chat should make him replay Fahrenheit (a.k.a. Indigo Prophecy) again. It's perfect: he hasn't played it in played 10 years, a remastered version came out on PS4 in 2016, and Phil has vigorously slobbered over David Cage's dick regarding the game he made in 2018 'Detroit: Become Human'.

Plus his chat can reminisce about how hilariously racist he was during various parts of his first playthrough and Phil will have to chew on his fingers to show how much more mature he is now than when he was 30. Get on it

 

[TheGoutburglar]

I love it when Phil's numerous bad traits bite him in the ass. He refuses to apply himself and get good enough at games that people don't feel like laughing at him anymore, but he also refuses to fully embrace being a joke for the money. He hates his audience for laughing at him, so he doesn't want to give them anything, not even for the money, despite it being entirely his fault that they laugh at him. The most he can accomplish is being boring, which keeps the tips low, which he hates, but refuses to do what he knows he needs to in order to get them back up.

Basically, Phil wants to be Phil but without the downsides to being Phil, which is impossible, but he would rather chase that forever and not get it than do the one thing that, once upon a time, could have saved him from a lot of grief: stop being a lazy asshole.

 

[L.I.M.B. Commander]

Ok wow I missed alot....anyway...

1. Its funny how Phil used this "threat" for Twitter clout and pity money much like how Phil used some random fan letter to prop up the vest streak....funny how that works.

2. Phil is still raging and is trash at COD...breaking news the sky is blue and water is wet.

3. Glad to see more of Phil's paranoia on display when it comes to unverified tips.

4. Its obvious he has mods and s on call because why wouldn't he.

5. The rampant Twitter clout chasing is hilarious because the misinformed "hot takes" are getting more and more ridiculous.

6. Its obvious our favorite blockhead is using this "retro game playthrough" to avoid playing DOS2 but also he's probably going to try to double dip because you know...greed.

7. As for this retro nonsense fuck that if I was apart of the squad I would want old games he's never played before like:
Zombies are my neighbors
Actraiser 1 and 2
Super Ghouls and Ghosts (no save states)
Zelda 2: adventure of link
Castlevania
Battletoads
Battletoads and Double Dragon

Hell I'll even be generous and give him some piss poor easy RPGs like Final Fantasy Mystic Quest, Breath Of Fire 1and 2, Phantasy Star and I even let him save state the old Fire Emblems if he plays them.

 

[Lift Me Up]

Anyone have video of him ranting about tips and refunding? Would love to hear the salt.

 

[DZoomer]

You guys keep saying that Phil's paypigs "should make him play X or Y", but AFAIK they can't make him play shit, no? The most power his paypigs have is to suggest games, and he's the one who picks the one he's gonna play. Or is there some event I'm not aware of in which the paypigs have absolute control over what he's gonna play?

 

[Pargon]

Jesus, over two ugly vidya models awkwardly clipping through each other to simulate a kiss? And implied sex with not so much as a single moan. It's funny that he says someone getting seduced is "weird shit". Phil just doesn't get the allure of sex... Unless it's Hook Hogen coming over to mightily ram his gouty behind, probably.

Wait, a kiss offends us now? And there was no kiss picture at the grand wedding. I wonder if Phil has ever kissed Kat! Maybe he wants to avoid catching something. Girls have cooties, after all, and horses in particular can get nastier parasites. Or demon infestations.

He hates intimacy. It very clearly makes him visibly uncomfortable. The idea of two people sharing an emotional moment between them is not something he's able to handle at his level of maturity. I have a relative who does the exact same thing. When two people kiss or make love or confess feelings in a movie they will hide their face or get up and leave the room or squirm in their seat. Without fail. This is even at twenty-five years of age.

This relative was oxygen-deprived when they were born and are developmentally disabled as a result. I'll just allow you all to draw your own conclusions.

 

[Maldron the Assassin]

i honestly wish phil's fans would use his own reasoning against him.

"man i really want to play chrono trigger"

"sorry phil, you just beat yakuza 7, we can't do another RPG so soon. play megaman x6"

like that's why phil's excuses are so stupid. he does it to excuse himself from doing things he doesn't want to do, but they're perfectly applicable to the stuff he does want to do as well.

"COD is supposed to be a realistic military shooter"

"ok try playing tarkov"

"no....."

I'm sorry but Tarkov is a game Phil would never be able to play, it would just ask too much of him. He's really confined to the world of babby's frst game like this Immortals game which is literally a dumbed down version of Assassin's Creed Odyssey.

 

[JamFlowMan]

You guys keep saying that Phil's paypigs "should make him play X or Y", but AFAIK they can't make him play shit, no? The most power his paypigs have is to suggest games, and he's the one who picks the one he's gonna play. Or is there some event I'm not aware of in which the paypigs have absolute control over what he's gonna play?

Pretty much. He wants to play Chrono Trigger so either his fans vote for Chrono Trigger or they have the gall to pick another game in which case Phil will play Chrono Trigger and maybe the game they voted for in a few months. Why he bothers to go through this sham of a poll must be an extra fuck you for the fans because there is no other reason to do so.

 

[TheGoutburglar]

You guys keep saying that Phil's paypigs "should make him play X or Y", but AFAIK they can't make him play shit, no? The most power his paypigs have is to suggest games, and he's the one who picks the one he's gonna play. Or is there some event I'm not aware of in which the paypigs have absolute control over what he's gonna play?

I don't think anyone means it literally. More like "This is what they should get him to bitch out from playing", because we know he's going to just toss any suggestions he doesn't like and play whatever he wants like he always does.

It's about the intent behind the suggestion. Telling him to play Scarface again, for example, is a middle finger, which he deserves specifically because of how fraudulent these viewer's choice polls are.

He hates intimacy. It very clearly makes him visibly uncomfortable. The idea of two people sharing an emotional moment between them is not something he's able to handle at his level of maturity. I have a relative who does the exact same thing. When two people kiss or make love or confess feelings in a movie they will hide their face or get up and leave the room or squirm in their seat. Without fail. This is even at twenty-five years of age.

This relative was oxygen-deprived when they were born and are developmentally disabled as a result. I'll just allow you all to draw your own conclusions.

I would be more willing to believe that his reaction is genuine if we knew he did it outside of his streams, because as it stands right now, it looks entirely for the benefit of his image.

 

[gh0stzero]

Pretty much. He wants to play Chrono Trigger so either his fans vote for Chrono Trigger or they have the gall to pick another game in which case Phil will play Chrono Trigger and maybe the game they voted for in a few months. Why he bothers to go through this sham of a poll must be an extra fuck you for the fans because there is no other reason to do so.

Why not just play chrono trigger then?

Setting up to blame his audience when nobody shows up to watch it?

 

[Mr.PiggyOinkOinkOinkOink]

Why not just play chrono trigger then?

Setting up to blame his audience when nobody shows up to watch it?

What a nudnik question. He wants his fans to pay to LET him play it, then also pay WHILE he plays it.

it’s not begging, it’s business

 

[TheGoutburglar]

Why not just play chrono trigger then?

Setting up to blame his audience when nobody shows up to watch it?

He'll do the latter no matter what, but as for why the charade, I'm pretty sure it's for the same reason he makes gross noises into the mic on purpose: he hates his fans. He always plays whatever he wants, and merely dangles the possibility of handing some control over to others so he can enjoy yanking it away. Just like that bitch who never lets Charlie Brown kick the football. Only unlike Charlie, his fans aren't really falling for it, because they pick things he's going to hate as a way of telling him off. Which just fuels his contempt for them, though he's not going to respect them anyway so it doesn't matter.

I'm sure he also wants to check the remote possibility that one day his fans will pick what he wants them to, as he loves having that kind of power over others.