What are some of the biggest examples of bad game design you’ve seen?

[Raiken]

What's weird is that it seems like they also wanted to enhance Mario 64. They could've used it to show off the DS's hardware without adding new characters and stages, but they added that shit anyway. If they wanted it to be more than a hardware flex, why not put it on something with analog controls so people have a better time playing it?

It shows that the DS was not made for 3D platformers, after this and rayman 2 it never really got one.

 

[Orange Rhymer]

"Alright, in this scene you're getting violently raped by a machine."

I can see why she left.

Apologies, but it was required.

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

Back for another "tales from the porn genre" and today we've got a good one

This is an old game called "another dimension" and it's the CREEPIEST SHIT I've ever seen. For starters, it's development started in like, 2006 and it 3d from the side, which means this was from someone with proper experience. It was also fully voiced, and given the theme of the game was brutal violence that's not a good thing. If you told me the audio was recorded at gunpoint I would fully believe you.

the only proof this game even exists is my memory, a 240p video, and various forums being like "yo is this shit real". It's shit you'd expect to find on the deep web. Anyone who genuinely enjoyed this game needs to be shot and killed.

But anyway onto the math.

yes you heard me right.

The game made you do math.

Not normal math, but EXTREMELY DIFFICULT PHD level mathematics. And if you get it wrong your character was killed. As in, "starved to death at the bottom of a pit". Or "dissolved feet first in weak acid over a period of weeks".

I wish I could get a fucking screen shot of it but I'm not downloading this cursed shit and I can't find the thread where I read about it.

People even apparently went to their fucking university professors and finally one guy got the answers. Of course by then people had figured out how to access the debug mode and skip it, but still.

Shits weird.

That's one way to make porn addicts good at math. Or make them find the debug mode. Both okay outcomes.

 

[Shining Wit]

Fuck the Blockheads in Okami
They're an invincible enemy type that exist to block paths. The way they are beaten is by a minigame, you get shown their weakpoints, then have to memorise and hit with the paintbrush after
The problem is the recognition is absurdly precise, you'll spend ages butting your head against it. And every time you fail, Issun chirps up and tells you the solution (hit the weakpoints, ammy!), because thats clearly the part you're struggling with

The one making me seethe atm is the Oni Island one, I know there's worse to come

 

[Sundae]

Fuck the Blockheads in Okami
They're an invincible enemy type that exist to block paths. The way they are beaten is by a minigame, you get shown their weakpoints, then have to memorise and hit with the paintbrush after
The problem is the recognition is absurdly precise, you'll spend ages butting your head against it. And every time you fail, Issun chirps up and tells you the solution (hit the weakpoints, ammy!), because thats clearly the part you're struggling with

The one making me seethe atm is the Oni Island one, I know there's worse to come

The last one in the game is the worst one. I had to resort to using my camera to record the scene where its weak points flash in screen, because of how many there were and how quickly they were flashed. It was so satisfying when it crumbled once the last spot was hit.

 

[melcarba99]

Have you guys talked about Cyberpunk? Other than the glitches, the game has some baffling desing choices:
-The rpg elements dont blend well with the gameplay. Granades do nothing, some random cholos are more powerful than futuristic corporate security, stat based armor system means you will wear the pink trousers over anything cool, tons of useless perks, etc.
-Looting is boring. No cool weapons, just ones with better stats.
-Stealth is way too easy. I didnt invest any points in the branch and I was always able to murder everyone like if I was Solid Snake.
-No GTA style minigames, like buying real state or silly side activities to make the city feel alive.
-Streetcred does nothing.
Some of these are clearly cut content, but the rpg system is so badly implemented that I feel that the game will never reach its full potential, no matter how many patches or dlcs they add.

 

[Cpl. Long Dong Silver]

>implying that higher tiers aren't full of mouthbreathers

World of Warships is just as bad. I honestly feel SBBM would improve the game. People grind to high tiers and yet have zero clues on how to play their class/ship and how to work as a team. I've seen bots make better decisions.

 

[Haramburger]

I read Nintendo Power long before I ever found a rare copy of this cart so I knew what to do, but it's funny to read online how many people were bamboozled by this. From a design perspective, there's nothing like this choice before or after in the entire game, and it's poorly explained within the game what the risk/reward is. It's still debated to this day whether it's obvious or not, so because these discussions are still happening 25 years later I consider that evidence of this being an element of bad game design.

 

[Raiken]

Fuck the Blockheads in Okami
They're an invincible enemy type that exist to block paths. The way they are beaten is by a minigame, you get shown their weakpoints, then have to memorise and hit with the paintbrush after
The problem is the recognition is absurdly precise, you'll spend ages butting your head against it. And every time you fail, Issun chirps up and tells you the solution (hit the weakpoints, ammy!), because thats clearly the part you're struggling with

The one making me seethe atm is the Oni Island one, I know there's worse to come

Most of them are not that hard, but the last one is near impossible without outside help. I'm still not sure if it's harder with or without motion controles.

View attachment 1863970

I read Nintendo Power long before I ever found a rare copy of this cart so I knew what to do, but it's funny to read online how many people were bamboozled by this. From a design perspective, there's nothing like this choice before or after in the entire game, and it's poorly explained within the game what the risk/reward is. It's still debated to this day whether it's obvious or not, so because these discussions are still happening 25 years later I consider that evidence of this being an element of bad game design.

What was it again to save shadow? 5 seconds? Who would sit on their asses for 2 whole minutes without knowing what's up?

 

[wtfNeedSignUp]

View attachment 1863970

I read Nintendo Power long before I ever found a rare copy of this cart so I knew what to do, but it's funny to read online how many people were bamboozled by this. From a design perspective, there's nothing like this choice before or after in the entire game, and it's poorly explained within the game what the risk/reward is. It's still debated to this day whether it's obvious or not, so because these discussions are still happening 25 years later I consider that evidence of this being an element of bad game design.

It's logical, but built on the knowledge of what happens if you choose to continue (who says there is no time counter after the choice?). But it is more of a secret for replays.

 

[An Ghost]

Games that bill themselves as "steep learning curve!" but mean "bad tutorial. A single guide will explain everything you need to know. You could figure it out by trial and error but you wont realize the consequences until an hour later."

 

[Dante Alighieri]

View attachment 1863970

I read Nintendo Power long before I ever found a rare copy of this cart so I knew what to do, but it's funny to read online how many people were bamboozled by this. From a design perspective, there's nothing like this choice before or after in the entire game, and it's poorly explained within the game what the risk/reward is. It's still debated to this day whether it's obvious or not, so because these discussions are still happening 25 years later I consider that evidence of this being an element of bad game design.

I have this game and I don't remember this scene at all. I'm also right at the final zone to kill/confront Kefka.

 

[Los Pollos Hermanos]

There's one side quest in Borderlands 2 that breaks the entire narrative.

For those who haven't played it, the Borderlands universe is run by a bunch of mega-corps. Maliwan, Tediore, Jakobs, etc dominate all aspects of life on Pandora. To add to this, when you die in-game you respawn at a checkpoint thanks to the Hyperion corporation's Renew-U system which resets your body and takes 10% of your cash as the service fee.

Throughout the game you get a bunch of messages and missions from a guy named Handsome Jack. Pretty late in the game, he'll give you a side-quest where he dares you to jump into lava. If you do, then as you respawn he sends you a message laughing at you and gives you a couple of bucks, quest complete.

The issue is that Handsome Jack is the president of Hyperion, and he's the primary antagonist. This means that the head of the company that runs the respawn system, that you're actively working against, doesn't actually disable the respawning system for you, which eventually lets you kill him. Also for some reason he doesn't use his own respawning system. And also Jack kills characters from the first game, who were also attached to the Renew-U system, but I guess now they're not and they're perma-dead.

It's just weird to me because normally I assume 1-Ups or extra lives to be just a gameplay contrivance and it's not a in-universe thing. It's not like Mario is literally dying and resurrecting over and over again, that's just for game purposes. For a game to A) acknowledge that death/respawn is LITERALLY occuring in-universe, and B) it's run by your enemy who DOESN'T disable it or use it against you, is just plain wrong. If there was a mission where you hack into the system and install a backdoor to use it that would be one thing, but as it is it's shining a spotlight on a really weird issue.

And then there's a whole bunch of nonsense with Sirens in Borderlands 3 but everyone acknowledges that the game is shit so whatever.

 

[Haramburger]

I have this game and I don't remember this scene at all. I'm also right at the final zone to kill/confront Kefka.

When you began the timed segment, you may not have completed it quickly enough to warrant the game giving you a chance to wait. It varies from version to version. It's possible you completed the floating island by the skin of your teeth, and the game didn't consider you having enough time left to pose the dilemma to you.

 

[Dysnomia]

So I finished Ys 2 again. It's been awhile. On normal you can just blaze through Darm with the shield magic. When your MP runs out you just use a roda fruit. You might take a little damage in between if you don't press the equipped item button fast enough. But that's it. I think getting hit hard depletes the shield faster. But I'm not entirely sure.

At Max level Dalles barely touched me but the Valkyria and Zearot enemies, the strongest in the game, could still murderize me if I wasn't careful. Why is Big Bad's right hand man, an evil wizard who is supposed to have an insane amount of power, less threatening to me than a couple of gold armored underlings? I literally brute forced him with very little damage and used two herbs just to be cautious when I really only needed one. Magic doesn't work on Dalles so no super cool white heat of homing death for you.

Also, in the Chronicles+ Steam version at least, you can get free opening hits on many bosses before they are vulnerable. You just charge the fire magic before you enter the boss room then release the button as soon as the boss appears. Works great for Gelady, who isn't supposed to be vulnerable until he opens his mouth to release that gross tentacle thing.

One thing I'll say about Gelady, he's really well animated and has some great facial expressions. He stands out amongst the bosses. He seems like he might be a fun guy if you could talk to him in Roo form.

Other than a few times when I wasn't being cautious enough I found normal to be way way too easy. I regret choosing normal. Other than some grinding it took me very little time to get through everything. You just pad it out giving gifts. I find it funny to flirt with Guido and Gila, who will ask you to move in with him.

 

[Bender]

There's one side quest in Borderlands 2 that breaks the entire narrative.

For those who haven't played it, the Borderlands universe is run by a bunch of mega-corps. Maliwan, Tediore, Jakobs, etc dominate all aspects of life on Pandora. To add to this, when you die in-game you respawn at a checkpoint thanks to the Hyperion corporation's Renew-U system which resets your body and takes 10% of your cash as the service fee.

Throughout the game you get a bunch of messages and missions from a guy named Handsome Jack. Pretty late in the game, he'll give you a side-quest where he dares you to jump into lava. If you do, then as you respawn he sends you a message laughing at you and gives you a couple of bucks, quest complete.

The issue is that Handsome Jack is the president of Hyperion, and he's the primary antagonist. This means that the head of the company that runs the respawn system, that you're actively working against, doesn't actually disable the respawning system for you, which eventually lets you kill him. Also for some reason he doesn't use his own respawning system. And also Jack kills characters from the first game, who were also attached to the Renew-U system, but I guess now they're not and they're perma-dead.

It's just weird to me because normally I assume 1-Ups or extra lives to be just a gameplay contrivance and it's not a in-universe thing. It's not like Mario is literally dying and resurrecting over and over again, that's just for game purposes. For a game to A) acknowledge that death/respawn is LITERALLY occuring in-universe, and B) it's run by your enemy who DOESN'T disable it or use it against you, is just plain wrong. If there was a mission where you hack into the system and install a backdoor to use it that would be one thing, but as it is it's shining a spotlight on a really weird issue.

And then there's a whole bunch of nonsense with Sirens in Borderlands 3 but everyone acknowledges that the game is shit so whatever.

I just assumed Angel put you into the New-U system, removed Handsome Jack and didn't add Roland because she didn't expect him to leave the safety of Sanctuary.

 

[Calandrino]

Back for another "tales from the porn genre" and today we've got a good one

This is an old game called "another dimension" and it's the CREEPIEST SHIT I've ever seen. For starters, it's development started in like, 2006 and it 3d from the side, which means this was from someone with proper experience. It was also fully voiced, and given the theme of the game was brutal violence that's not a good thing. If you told me the audio was recorded at gunpoint I would fully believe you.

the only proof this game even exists is my memory, a 240p video, and various forums being like "yo is this shit real". It's shit you'd expect to find on the deep web. Anyone who genuinely enjoyed this game needs to be shot and killed.

But anyway onto the math.

yes you heard me right.

The game made you do math.

Not normal math, but EXTREMELY DIFFICULT PHD level mathematics. And if you get it wrong your character was killed. As in, "starved to death at the bottom of a pit". Or "dissolved feet first in weak acid over a period of weeks".

I wish I could get a fucking screen shot of it but I'm not downloading this cursed shit and I can't find the thread where I read about it.

People even apparently went to their fucking university professors and finally one guy got the answers. Of course by then people had figured out how to access the debug mode and skip it, but still.

Shits weird.

Good lord, just reading about this is enough to shock even me. Obviously you should see the guro porn when you get the problem right, not when you mess up. I can't believe there are still indie devs that get this wrong.

 

[Furret]

Games that bill themselves as "steep learning curve!" but mean "bad tutorial. A single guide will explain everything you need to know. You could figure it out by trial and error but you wont realize the consequences until an hour later."

They say the game has a steep learning curve, but what they mean is that you'll have to look up how to do everything beyond the basics online.

 

[TFT-A9]

They say the game has a steep learning curve, but what they mean is that you'll have to look up how to do everything beyond the basics online.

That is MWO to a tee. The in-game tutorial barely even covers basics. "Can you make your mech move? Can you press R to target things and identify weak components? You're clearly ready for the rest of the game." The "tutorial" minigames that teach how to spread/mitigate incoming damage and so on aren't even really good at teaching that. There are dozens of more involved and specialized concepts that never get touched on and are actually pretty fucking important past like the LOWEST fucking tier in the game, they basically gloss over minimap functions and never teach you a damn thing about specialized weapons systems, the skill tree, jump jet maneuvering, etc.

 

[b0o0pinsn0o0tz]

View attachment 1863970

I read Nintendo Power long before I ever found a rare copy of this cart so I knew what to do, but it's funny to read online how many people were bamboozled by this. From a design perspective, there's nothing like this choice before or after in the entire game, and it's poorly explained within the game what the risk/reward is. It's still debated to this day whether it's obvious or not, so because these discussions are still happening 25 years later I consider that evidence of this being an element of bad game design.

As much as I love that game I think the Vanish/Doom glitch is worse. Makes way too many boss fights a non issue.