I do believe it's a thing 100 percent. I'm just hard in denial to save my ass because it's the last thing I'm clinging onto pretty much. There's pretty much no hope for me so I don't even try anymore. It's like, why should I even bother, why should I even invest time into it if I KNOW that I wont' get anything out of it. That nobody will ever love me. So I don't even waste time with it. I just accept it and try to find the best substitute. Really do I have a chance, do I have any other option. If you lived my life you would already know the answer to that. I don't. Not a chance in fucking hell.
So yeah, I recognize there is a problem, but it's not like it's gonna change anything. It's gonna be just like you say it is. Virgin for the next thirty years. Of course if I make it that long, who really knows. I already sabotaged my life pretty much beacuse I fucked my head so hard that I raped away any chance of having a normal future. So I just rock with the shit now. I already am bitter, lonely, and alone. I see no escape, no light at the end of the tunnel. I just see no healing. No healing at all.