DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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good lord this fucking Dude needs to go to the park or something I’m starting to worry what the lack of sunlight is doing to this man
3:40 AM Tuesday morning, and he ( 38 ) and his "adult" wife (30) are up watching playthroughs of video games on YouTube.. Neither one has a real job, and they both leech on the rest of society. It's no wonder neither one of them have any friends or talk to anyone. I bet they couldnt hold a meaningful conversation about anything outside of video games. The whorse probably just stares at you all pilled up if you tried talking about anything above a 5th grade level, and the pig just wants to hear himself talk, despite having a limited knowledge on damn near every topic, aside from super turbo street fighter EX 10 edition for the super sega nes 64.
 
3:40 AM Tuesday morning, and he ( 38 ) and his "adult" wife (30) are up watching playthroughs of video games on YouTube.. Neither one has a real job, and they both leech on the rest of society. It's no wonder neither one of them have any friends or talk to anyone. I bet they couldnt hold a meaningful conversation about anything outside of video games. The whorse probably just stares at you all pilled up if you tried talking about anything above a 5th grade level, and the pig just wants to hear himself talk, despite having a limited knowledge on damn near every topic, aside from super turbo street fighter EX 10 edition for the super sega nes 64.
Presuming Kat still holds the same job as claimed on Phil's bankruptcy filing, she does have a real job, and during her eight hours a week or whatever she spends bagging groceries and ringing people up she contributes more to helping other people than Phil has in the past twelve years.
 
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good lord this fucking Dude needs to go to the park or something I’m starting to worry what the lack of sunlight is doing to this man

He loses his shit when people mention Katherine, but he has to mention that potato whenever he can. Bloody sad his life is.
 
I suppose that's my prob, i can only really find the humor on one side.
This is a problem though, for real. Having a decent % of the thread being people who are still too attached to Phil getting justice or whatever affects us all in some small amount and also gives the paypigs what they want, which is to see us hurting that Phil is getting money. Gotta step away a bit and breath. Read some other threads and come back when something happens.

It's just as bad as a shitty content creator following everything Phil does and slinging seethe at him all stream. It creates a whole toilet full of legitimate detractors.
 
You know, I was doing some Spring cleaning today and upon realizing that the money I had spent on my hobby could rather have been invested into Phil's gacha addiction, felt so unbelievably owned. To think that in lieu of using some of my disposable income for physical goods and/or services that bring me joy, I could have instead squandered it on a fat, ungrateful man-child gives me FOMO of the highest order.

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Maybe I can take a page out of the book of Jakileez/OIC and pawn this stuff off so I can still hope to be initiated into the Pigroach Cult; only then will I be able to experience true nirvana.

Your virgin gun collection, vs. The chad Phil's door hatchet.
You stand no chance.

But nice collection mate, I really envy you lot. All the fun stuff is illegal here.
 
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If Phil gets the support he wants he continues making himself a laughingstock and producing milk.

If Phil doesn't get the support he wants he turns into a desperate flailing toddler.

If you can learn to find the humor in both sides of him you can appreciate whether the ride ends or keeps going.
I think if you are just a observer and nothing else you can eventually learn to find entertainment of both sides no matter how it goes, if you don't already. I'm not going to lie I actually enjoy when things are going really well for him because its fucking hilarious, his ego, clown mode and mood shifts based on the dollar amount on the top screen is truly a sight to see.

Although I know he doesn't deserve all the money and support he gets, getting mad about or getting emotional investment in it is only going to be setting up for disappointment.

He's never really going to get ample punishment for what he's done, so why not just enjoy the show for as long as it runs? I'm sure Philip has a ton of "sagas" just waiting to happen imo
 
But nice collection mate, I really envy you lot. All the fun stuff is illegal here.
I know huh making me jealous, I had to liquidate some of my collection a few months back for some unseen expenses but I still have my deagle that's my 4th place evo championship right there in the form of a big heavy expensive rather impractical monstrosity of a handcannon. But hey thanks to all the shit going down it's only appreciated in value so there's that.
 
All the fun stuff is illegal here.

Nigel is correct, even jokes are now illegal
lol.JPG

God bless the kiwi farms
 
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good lord this fucking Dude needs to go to the park or something I’m starting to worry what the lack of sunlight is doing to this man

It says a lot that Phil thinks that bugsnax, the game made for children, is a narrative masterpeice because they literally spell out what is happening for the kids playing the game whereas a game like Little Nightmares is more symbolic in its storytelling that requires perhaps a little bit of putting two and two together is far beyond Philbert's gin-soaked capabilities.
 
He's never really going to get ample punishment for what he's done, so why not just enjoy the show for as long as it runs?
Going back to my Mark of Cain autism, you could argue that Phil is already being punished. Let's look at the Biblical story that I'm drawing from here, rather than killing Cain right away as punishment for killing his brother and lying about it to God, God made it so that the Mark protected Cain from premature death from any source, as God wanted to make him live in suffering, as the Mark makes it that anything he does and anyone he interacts with would suffer a great disaster, kind of like how the DSP Autism Vortex (aka The Mark of Dave) D'VOURS, chews up and spits out anything and anyone who dares directly interact with him.

I mean look at his life - his only "legacy" and accomplishment is the fact that he somehow still exists on the internet despite completely losing his popularity early in his career. He's a complete laughingstock to almost everyone that even knows about him and that just eats away at him. He's got no drive, no real ambition in life except existing. He's got no friends, he coops himself up in his house almost all week, the only interaction he has outside of his wheelchairs on-stream are his dopey wife and Punished "Venom" Jasper - A Cat Denied His Claws. I can go on but there's this big archive of his failings, almost 7000 pages long you might say.

Finally, one part of the Mark of Cain is that any soil that Cain would try working would bear no yield. No matter how much money Phil gets it all goes to his collection of worthless jpegs that are stored somewhere on the internet that have no further monetary value. He can't trade those jpegs, he can't sell his account, and one day the game will be shut off permanently, cementing that he threw money into a bottomless pit. There is no "yield" from his investment, that's why begging resumes every stream, no matter if he got 10 dollars or 10k dollars on the previous stream. You could also compare his gacha financial black hole and the immediate retconning of any funds he got on the previous stream to the punishment of Sisyphus, since all the "work" Phil puts into streaming is futile if you think about it because even after his credit card debt got cleared he's still back here begging like it never got granted in the first place, but my 'tismpost is already getting longer than it should. Maybe next time.
 
Gotta step away a bit and breath.
That's what I've started doing. I used to tune into the end of his streams just to see if he hit the tips goal or not, but now that his army of wheelchairs have started to rally around their goutmaster, I've just kept it to Divinity streams and Ghost and Goblins where it's not a big deal to me if he hits the tips goal or not.
 
Going back to my Mark of Cain autism, you could argue that Phil is already being punished. Let's look at the Biblical story that I'm drawing from here, rather than killing Cain right away as punishment for killing his brother and lying about it to God, God made it so that the Mark protected Cain from premature death from any source, as God wanted to make him live in suffering, as the Mark makes it that anything he does and anyone he interacts with would suffer a great disaster, kind of like how the DSP Autism Vortex (aka The Mark of Dave) D'VOURS, chews up and spits out anything and anyone who dares directly interact with him.

I mean look at his life - his only "legacy" and accomplishment is the fact that he somehow still exists on the internet despite completely losing his popularity early in his career. He's a complete laughingstock to almost everyone that even knows about him and that just eats away at him. He's got no drive, no real ambition in life except existing. He's got no friends, he coops himself up in his house almost all week, the only interaction he has outside of his wheelchairs on-stream are his dopey wife and Punished "Venom" Jasper - A Cat Denied His Claws. I can go on but there's this big archive of his failings, almost 7000 pages long you might say.

Finally, one part of the Mark of Cain is that any soil that Cain would try working would bear no yield. No matter how much money Phil gets it all goes to his collection of worthless jpegs that are stored somewhere on the internet that have no further monetary value. He can't trade those jpegs, he can't sell his account, and one day the game will be shut off permanently, cementing that he threw money into a bottomless pit. There is no "yield" from his investment, that's why begging resumes every stream, no matter if he got 10 dollars or 10k dollars on the previous stream. You could also compare his gacha financial black hole and the immediate retconning of any funds he got on the previous stream to the punishment of Sisyphus, since all the "work" Phil puts into streaming is futile if you think about it because even after his credit card debt got cleared he's still back here begging like it never got granted in the first place, but my 'tismpost is already getting longer than it should. Maybe next time.
I actually agree with you that comes back to the idea that for people that really enjoy it no matter what, ultimately its at Phil's expense, because any downturn his life "behind the scenes" or on stream that it takes it is just him receiving the fruits of his labor, and I guess you can see it as when things go good it's just life's way of toying with him by giving him some kind of small reward which he just squanders anyway and brings him right back down again. I think no matter how well things might go in short term or even long term bursts with the vest streak for example, I think deep down he knows he's unhappy and miserable, that no matter how much of a shift that nice flow of cash gives him momentarily it doesn't take away the regret of decisions he has made that has made people that genuinely cared and worried for him fed up and walk away from his life. That's why he has to constantly remind himself, I feel more than anything, that he's happy, that he loves his life. I think it hits him the most when he's really by himself with his thoughts. In that sense I believe he's being punished every day, even if its not something we see.
 
You know, I was doing some Spring cleaning today and upon realizing that the money I had spent on my hobby could rather have been invested into Phil's gacha addiction, felt so unbelievably owned. To think that in lieu of using some of my disposable income for physical goods and/or services that bring me joy, I could have instead squandered it on a fat, ungrateful man-child gives me FOMO of the highest order.

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Maybe I can take a page out of the book of Jakileez/OIC and pawn this stuff off so I can still hope to be initiated into the Pigroach Cult; only then will I be able to experience true nirvana.
I would post mine but unfortunately they are all at the bottom of a nonspecific lake due to a tragic watercraft related mishap.
 
I would be too. I'm not ashamed to admit that it does upset me a bit to see a asshole like him get rewarded. In some small way they kinda are owning the trolls. Every time they hit the tips goal, it means a happy dsp, and a happy dsp means a boring piggy to watch. People keep saying it's just a small number of paypigs who keep donating but that's all someone like him needs. These are his most loyal and die hard fans who've been with him for years, and they're going to be there for many more years to come. And even if some do leave the vortex, the vortex will just pull another paypig (like OIC) in to replace them, and the pig cycle will just continue on.
I actually find it kind of pathetic when you actually look closer its not dozens of people giving him money its 1 or 2 people dropping a huge amount of money.


Its really actually sad and just shows that he isnt as popular as he think it is.
 
The truth of the matter is, I do find DSP to be much more entertaining when he gets denied his WWE Champions allowance. Watching the paypigs debase themselves isn't as fun because they don't have the same online presence that DSP does. Also I disagree with the notion that paypigs funding his lifestyle means we get more DSP in the future. DSP is not going anywhere. He could get $0/$100 for 10 straight streams and he would still show up the next day. He could lose his condo, his wife, his catson, his vests, and cowboy hat to his creditors because he no longer has the option of bankruptcy and he would be streaming from his childhood bedroom back in CT. Even if he was forced to get a real job he would still stream during his free time. He is a massive narcissist who loves to hear his own voice. There's no situation in which DSP leaves the internet, even if the money dries up. Part of what makes someone a lolcow is their complete and utter inability to just walk away and take the L.

But if you do find the paypigs destroying their financial future to fund a gacha addict entertaining, more power you.
 
Even if he was forced to get a real job he would still stream during his free time. He is a massive narcissist who loves to hear his own voice. There's no situation in which DSP leaves the internet, even if the money dries up.
I disagree. He despises streaming, and if he were ever forced to get a real job to support himself, he'd ditch the internet in a heartbeat. He'd just come home from work and eat pig slop while marathoning Netflix till he passes out.
 
The truth of the matter is, I do find DSP to be much more entertaining when he gets denied his WWE Champions allowance. Watching the paypigs debase themselves isn't as fun because they don't have the same online presence that DSP does. Also I disagree with the notion that paypigs funding his lifestyle means we get more DSP in the future. DSP is not going anywhere. He could get $0/$100 for 10 straight streams and he would still show up the next day. He could lose his condo, his wife, his catson, his vests, and cowboy hat to his creditors because he no longer has the option of bankruptcy and he would be streaming from his childhood bedroom back in CT. Even if he was forced to get a real job he would still stream during his free time. He is a massive narcissist who loves to hear his own voice. There's no situation in which DSP leaves the internet, even if the money dries up. Part of what makes someone a lolcow is their complete and utter inability to just walk away and take the L.

But if you do find the paypigs destroying their financial future to fund a gacha addict entertaining, more power you.
Qualified disagree. Phil would stop streaming tomorrow if he won the lottery or found some other, easier way of making the same amount of money. He hates his audience and a part of that hate I believe comes from the fact that he knows fundamentally that he is beholden to them, cf. him dancing like a monkey for Tut or whoever that whale was dropping stacks to give him like 700 tier 3 subs a few years ago. I do agree that Phil is a narcissist but I think he gets his fix the most by being able to keep anything and anyone he doesn't like at arm's length until he doesn't need them anymore.

Also Phil getting money specifically during games which make him miserable and/or look stupid is great because it means he'll keep playing them and debasing himself like the ten cent whore he is.

ETA: partially ninja'd by @Kosher Dill .
 
Qualified disagree. Phil would stop streaming tomorrow if he won the lottery or found some other, easier way of making the same amount of money. He hates his audience and a part of that hate I believe comes from the fact that he knows fundamentally that he is beholden to them, cf. him dancing like a monkey for Tut or whoever that whale was dropping stacks to give him like 700 tier 3 subs a few years ago. I do agree that Phil is a narcissist but I think he gets his fix the most by being able to keep anything and anyone he doesn't like at arm's length until he doesn't need them anymore.

Also Phil getting money specifically during games which make him miserable and/or look stupid is great because it means he'll keep playing them and debasing himself like the ten cent whore he is.
I agree with the part about the lottery (assuming he doesn't blow it all immediately). If DSP ever truly found real financial success he would probably stop streaming (although I don't think he would disappear from the internet). However if he was dead broke and had to get a job I still think he would stream because he's still chasing the dragon of when he was 'white hot popular' on youtube. No job that DSP can actually get would satisfy him money-wise. Despite his delusions, Boeing is not going to pay him $150k/yr because of his decade old ACE certification.
 
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