DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

[gettingthatgrooveback]

Yesterday, Phil talked about the future of his streams and I would like to post about it for posterity's sake because I think it was interesting and extremely retarded. He also retconned his "10-year plan".
@Surly Muppet summed it up briefly in the corresponding thread:

- Phil talks about his future as a content creator and says that he has some vague idea of transitioning to having shows dedicated to topics, rather than gameplay. He wants to 'have a discourse'. I don't know if he understands that to 'have a discourse' you have to actually be willing to talk with other people and hear different opinions. But he appears to see his future as some sort of pundit/podcaster. This may explain why he has been trying to engage with different topics on Twitter - he thinks he is developing some future brand.
- Phil retcons the '10 year plan to get a job' and the promise that he made to his mom (to get $4k that as far as we know did not go to taxes or debt) to sound like it was a plan to leave streaming and get a job in 2020. Phil frames this as 'if he had done this', it likely would have destroyed his life because he would have had no income. This makes no sense on multiple levels. You took $4k from your mom and lied to her Phil. This story will never be anything more than that.

So in the future, he'd like to have a show in which he talks about current events and even politics. To that, I say: fuck yes! I'd love to hear him embarrass himself. Also, what exactly stops him from doing that now? He never said of course.

Phil said that he was fully on board phasing out streaming for a real job. But then the pandemic happened. He literally said that if he had gotten a job in 2019 he would have lost everything.
"Imagine if I had quit streaming and just went out there and got a brick and mortar job but then Covid happened. How many people were laid off last year because of Covid? It seriously would have been the end of me. My life is just luck."
Let's just sit back and think how autistic his thinking is:
1) If he had found a real job in 2019, he would have definitely lost it because of Covid.
2) Falling back on streaming wouldn't be an option after that.

A reminder that Phil is not either retarded or autistic, he's both. Lazy too. He fucking blamed Covid for disrupting his 10-year plan. Oh my God.

Clip of him saying all this (it's almost 7 minutes):

 

[strandedcastaway]

Yeah, I'm sure a guy who bans anyone who disagrees with him and who is afraid to state an opinion on literally anything will be a great success discussing politics.

 

[marlintan]

You guys should get together and remake the 3 stooges movie! "Thanks for the money, dummies! Cause that's exactly what you fucking are! A bunch of fucking empty headed idiots who paid me money to get absolutely nothing out of it! Thanks "

Moe/Curly Howard & Larry Fine would roll in their graves more than the will sasso fucking movie good god man, at least let vaudeville exist uncorrupted by the pig... the feels man, the feels.

 

[Pargon]

Rate me autistic but I hope he keeps getting so much money from his tips. Seriously. Imagine him sweating bullets in 12 months when taxes come up again. Doods *snort* you won't believe it *snort* I have to pay even more taxes then last year. I don't know why *snort* I did nothing wrong!

This already happens every year. The pigs fall for it without fail.

Yeah, I'm sure a guy who bans anyone who disagrees with him and who is afraid to state an opinion on literally anything will be a great success discussing politics.

I would love for him to play moderator between two other people on some hot button issue only for both of them to simultaneously call him a stupid faggot the first time he tried to interject his own opinion.

 

[Optimus Prime]

"Imagine if I had quit streaming and just went out there and got a brick and mortar job but then Covid happened. How many people were laid off last year because of Covid? It seriously would have been the end of me. My life is just luck."

When the only thing that brings you joy in life is a simulated slot machine that spits out sweaty men, I guess you could say that.

Of course, he's still lying since at no point during all this does he mention what kind of a job he actually would get. Normal consumer retail would kill him both because of physical demands (his 'bad back') and forced customer interaction (you know he'd bitch and moan about himself having to wear a mask while at the same time bitching about customers who don't). There isn't a chance in hell he could get a desk job like a coder since he doesn't know a fucking thing about software development. And administration? As if! Fast Food manager maybe but that's just largely the same no-go as retail because of human interaction.

Phil is unemployable by his own design.

 

[samovski]

So the plan to get a job at 48 years old isn't going to happen?

Le shock.

So did he rob his mother or do you think she just let her baby have his way again? Either seems possible with this cunt.

 

[Pargon]

When the only thing that brings you joy in life is a simulated slot machine that spits out sweaty men, I guess you could say that.

Of course, he's still lying since at no point during all this does he mention what kind of a job he actually would get. Normal consumer retail would kill him both because of physical demands (his 'bad back') and forced customer interaction (you know he'd bitch and moan about himself having to wear a mask while at the same time bitching about customers who don't). There isn't a chance in hell he could get a desk job like a coder since he doesn't know a fucking thing about software development. And administration? As if! Fast Food manager maybe but that's just largely the same no-go as retail because of human interaction.

Phil is unemployable by his own design.

Hilariously, had he been working a low-level job for around a year at the time the pandemic began and been laid off he would have made bank via regular state unemployment and the emergency covid benefit, and been set for months. He wouldn't have even had to stream.

 

[gettingthatgrooveback]

When the only thing that brings you joy in life is a simulated slot machine that spits out sweaty men, I guess you could say that.

Of course, he's still lying since at no point during all this does he mention what kind of a job he actually would get. Normal consumer retail would kill him both because of physical demands (his 'bad back') and forced customer interaction (you know he'd bitch and moan about himself having to wear a mask while at the same time bitching about customers who don't). There isn't a chance in hell he could get a desk job like a coder since he doesn't know a fucking thing about software development. And administration? As if! Fast Food manager maybe but that's just largely the same no-go as retail because of human interaction.

Phil is unemployable by his own design.

Yep, predictably, he's rationalizing his unemployability.

 

[Swirling weeb]

I do wonder if Phil still has some inheritance he’s been milking that shit for almost two decades even with pension that must be getting dry by now

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

Yeah, I'm sure a guy who bans anyone who disagrees with him and who is afraid to state an opinion on literally anything will be a great success discussing politics.

I remember back in I wanna say either '15 or '16 he said he seriously considered starting making khantent where he would talk about things unrelated to gaming, one of them was of course pahlitics. Of course, he never went through with it, though I wish he did. Now we have another chance of possibly getting A+ entertainment from a delusional hermit who, among thousands of other things, thought the UK was in the Iberian peninsula and who pronounces Illinois as "Ill-a-noise".

So, bottom line, if he wants to do pahlitikhal khantent, I welcome it. Would be funny to see what his delusional mind can think up regarding, I dunno, unemployment or foreign policy.

 

[Forbidden Math]

Yesterday, Phil talked about the future of his streams and I would like to post about it for posterity's sake because I think it was interesting and extremely retarded. He also retconned his "10-year plan".
@Surly Muppet summed it up briefly in the corresponding thread:

So in the future, he'd like to have a show in which he talks about current events and even politics. To that, I say: fuck yes! I'd love to hear him embarrass himself. Also, what exactly stops him from doing that now? He never said of course.

Phil said that he was fully on board phasing out streaming for a real job. But then the pandemic happened. He literally said that if he had gotten a job in 2019 he would have lost everything.
"Imagine if I had quit streaming and just went out there and got a brick and mortar job but then Covid happened. How many people were laid off last year because of Covid? It seriously would have been the end of me. My life is just luck."
Let's just sit back and think how autistic his thinking is:
1) If he had found a real job in 2019, he would have definitely lost it because of Covid.
2) Falling back on streaming wouldn't be an option after that.

A reminder that Phil is not either retarded or autistic, he's both. Lazy too. He fucking blamed Covid for disrupting his 10-year plan. Oh my God.

Clip of him saying all this (it's almost 7 minutes):
View attachment 1971275

This whole rant is so weird, but my favorite part is he acts like literally everyone lost their jobs due to covid and he does this while his potato wife kept her shitty job all year. I know plenty of people who are still employed, and I even know people who are making tons of money right now (more than DSP) taking advantage of the boom market that is COVID testing and vaccination (both fields that require no skill or long history of being employed). But no, he would have lost everything, and that's his narrative and he's sticking with it. Also this COVID thing will clearly last forever so getting a job in the future is pointless too I guess???

In the year 2041 only streamers will survive because everyone else will have lost their jobs. How do the people who lost their jobs pay streamers? Don't ask questions you stupid kid.

Edit: I also wanted to say don't get your hopes up on DSP talking politics. He's lazy as fuck and his long term sounds like it's 20 years from now when he's still streaming at 60.

 

[Iron Hamster]

This whole rant is so weird, but my favorite part is he acts like literally everyone lost their jobs due to covid and he does this while his potato wife kept her shitty job all year. I know plenty of people who are still employed, and I even know people who are making tons of money right now (more than DSP) taking advantage of the boom market that is COVID testing and vaccination (both fields that require no skill or long history of being employed). But no, he would have lost everything, and that's his narrative and he's sticking with it. Also this COVID thing will clearly last forever so getting a job in the future is pointless too I guess???

In the year 2041 only streamers will survive because everyone else will have lost their jobs. How do the people who lost their jobs pay streamers? Don't ask questions you stupid kid.

Edit: I also wanted to say don't get your hopes up on DSP talking politics. He's lazy as fuck and his long term sounds like it's 20 years from now when he's still streaming at 60.

Well, he would have lost everything but not because of corona. He would have been fired again for being the asshole he is.

 

[Kosher Dill]

Turns out Kat was bored looking for something to play on his work console

But he still owns it and it's business related... right?

 

[gobsmackedmortician]

Plot twist
''the ten-year plan was bullshit to get my mum off my back, snort''

 

[Vic Viper T301]

Moe/Curly Howard & Larry Fine would roll in their graves more than the will sasso fucking movie good god man, at least let vaudeville exist uncorrupted by the pig... the feels man, the feels.

DSP is obviously Shemp.

 

[DZoomer]

Yesterday, Phil talked about the future of his streams and I would like to post about it for posterity's sake because I think it was interesting and extremely retarded. He also retconned his "10-year plan".
@Surly Muppet summed it up briefly in the corresponding thread:

So in the future, he'd like to have a show in which he talks about current events and even politics. To that, I say: fuck yes! I'd love to hear him embarrass himself. Also, what exactly stops him from doing that now? He never said of course.

Phil said that he was fully on board phasing out streaming for a real job. But then the pandemic happened. He literally said that if he had gotten a job in 2019 he would have lost everything.
"Imagine if I had quit streaming and just went out there and got a brick and mortar job but then Covid happened. How many people were laid off last year because of Covid? It seriously would have been the end of me. My life is just luck."
Let's just sit back and think how autistic his thinking is:
1) If he had found a real job in 2019, he would have definitely lost it because of Covid.
2) Falling back on streaming wouldn't be an option after that.

A reminder that Phil is not either retarded or autistic, he's both. Lazy too. He fucking blamed Covid for disrupting his 10-year plan. Oh my God.

Clip of him saying all this (it's almost 7 minutes):
View attachment 1971275

He simply wants to be able to still make money while not finding a job and not having to play games.

I hope he does that. The only way we'll still have Phil as a lolcow is if he keeps being a streamer. Sure, he'd get the chance to become a much better person if he'd be able to find an actual job and stopped streaming. But then we wouldn't get gold like him saying that he has fans saying that "He's like a rock to them".

It'll be extremely pathetic to see Phil as a 50 year old divorced man, with 50 viewers and depending on one supporter to give him money so he won't starve.

But goddamn will it be funny.

 

[Detractor#38657]

This already happens every year. The pigs fall for it without fail.

I would love for him to play moderator between two other people on some hot button issue only for both of them to simultaneously call him a stupid faggot the first time he tried to interject his own opinion.

Excuse me gentlemen, but I must digress for a moment to highlight the matter of the tips goal. This right here, *points* this sucks. I didn't think we'd be seeing the vest tonight, and it looks like my prediction was accurate. Please, continue.

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

(Stolen from Twitter)
Phil agonizing in bed

 

[Optimus Prime]

He simply wants to be able to still make money while not finding a job and not having to play games.

I hope he does that. The only way we'll still have Phil as a lolcow is if he keeps being a streamer. Sure, he'd get the chance to become a much better person if he'd be able to find an actual job and stopped streaming. But then we wouldn't get gold like him saying that he has fans saying that "He's like a rock to them".

It'll be extremely pathetic to see Phil as a 50 year old divorced man, with 50 viewers and depending on one supporter to give him money so he won't starve.

But goddamn will it be funny.

Nah, honestly if he goes to podcast, he might think its a good idea to ultimately figure out how to take phone calls.

Yes I'm suggesting Radio Graffiti 2.0. A new generation of Capitalist Tub Men.

 

[Dread Pirate Retard]

But he still owns it and it's business related... right?

There's precisely zero doubt in my mind that when 2021 tax time comes around it will be included as a business expense.