Orbiter MASSIVE SHOUTOUT TO Derich Ip / Koom and the Gang - [NSFW] Cum meet a retarded Asian, his any% speedrun to prison, and the retarded whores they meet along the way

[Quantum Diabetes]

This is an absolute slow motion car accident and I fuckin love it

I feel like it's speeding up. Derich might know about that porn version of e3 they hold in Vegas in normal years and is looking into booking flights.

 

[TheTractor]

The candle that burns the brightest doesn't last long. Derish is cooming the few braincells he has left into the void and I fear what creature will spawn from it.

 

[Big Brown Schlub]

There's no way Derish hasn't found a way onto a porn industry black list by now. Kid gives off massive red flags.

If these two guys can still go to porn conventions while thirst and coomposting then Derrish will still be able to unless he gets caught murdering hookers or something (and even then they might still let him in).

 

[The Penultimate Warrior]

If these two guys can still go to porn conventions while thirst and coomposting then Derrish will still be able to unless he gets caught murdering hookers or something (and even then they might still let him in).

Isn't the first one the guy from The Hills Have Eyes? Or possibly the singer from Midnight Oil.

 

[An Avenging Bird]

The candle that burns the brightest doesn't last long. Derish is cooming the few braincells he has left into the void and I fear what creature will spawn from it.

It certainly won't be a progeny conceived with a willing female participant

 

[Schmeckel]

I feel like it's speeding up. Derich might know about that porn version of e3 they hold in Vegas in normal years and is looking into booking flights.

If alternate-Amos-Yee went to the AVN show, he'd be very quickly removed if he acted even remotely how he tweets. Having gone to it a few times myself (owned/managed a porn store once upon a time), it's a really fun show and you walk away with a metric boatload of free stuff, posters, pics, and a whole lotta boobs. Derich would either die as soon as he hit the showroom floor, or he'd be clubbed with a billy club shaped like a dildo for creeping on the first girl he saw.

 

[DerichLovesNWA]

 

[Watamelon]

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How does he even know it was the third load?

Does Derich pay attention to porn plots? Does he watch the Director's Cut with Behind the Scenes interviews? Or maybe it was just in the title, but that sounds too easy for our alpha level coomer.

I need answers. Take this shitty edit in the meanwhile.

 

[Cyber Bowling]

How does he even know it was the third load?

Does Derich pay attention to porn plots? Does he watch the Director's Cut with Behind the Scenes interviews? Or maybe it was just in the title, but that sounds too easy for our alpha level coomer.

That's one of the reasons his tweets are so funny to me. I don't think he understands the point of porn. Like, he does legitimately seem to watch it for the plot. And, based on some of the comments he makes, it sounds like the racier details are directly lifted from the title. So, in this instance, it being the third load was probably in the title or description or whatever, and he just latches onto that because he doesn't understand what else is going on to make a meaningful comment.

It would explain why he cheerfully comments about someone being pissed on, like it was just the most normal thing in the world. I don't think he's such a deviant that some girl being pissed on is just standard fare for him, I think he's just so out of his element, he has no idea what he's really commenting about. Kind of like, to use a more innocent example, someone trying to pretend to be a tech expert by latching onto random tech related buzzwords, asking someone how many firewalls they had to go through to break the ISP to torrent their bitcoin. Except, with Derich, he's basically taking the first sentence of a porn video description and rephrasing it as a question/comment. Or latching onto basic sense his brain can kind of understand, like thinking the porn stars were actually eating spaghetti because it was in the background of the scene or whatever.

I admit, I might be overestimating how much of a tard he actually is

 

[Iron Father]

That's one of the reasons his tweets are so funny to me. I don't think he understands the point of porn. Like, he does legitimately seem to watch it for the plot. And, based on some of the comments he makes, it sounds like the racier details are directly lifted from the title. So, in this instance, it being the third load was probably in the title or description or whatever, and he just latches onto that because he doesn't understand what else is going on to make a meaningful comment.

It would explain why he cheerfully comments about someone being pissed on, like it was just the most normal thing in the world. I don't think he's such a deviant that some girl being pissed on is just standard fare for him, I think he's just so out of his element, he has no idea what he's really commenting about. Kind of like, to use a more innocent example, someone trying to pretend to be a tech expert by latching onto random tech related buzzwords, asking someone how many firewalls they had to go through to break the ISP to torrent their bitcoin. Except, with Derich, he's basically taking the first sentence of a porn video description and rephrasing it as a question/comment. Or latching onto basic sense his brain can kind of understand, like thinking the porn stars were actually eating spaghetti because it was in the background of the scene or whatever.

I admit, I might be overestimating how much of a tard he actually is

This. It's like he's so retarded that any and all innuendo goes straight over his head. If a bitch walked up to him and asked for a bite of his sushi roll he'd probably try to start a conversation about actual sushi, what her favorite type is, etc. I've never seen someone this obsessed with porn that doesn't have a mind quick to land in the gutter.

 

[hundredthousand]

This. It's like he's so retarded that any and all innuendo goes straight over his head. If a bitch walked up to him and asked for a bite of his sushi roll he'd probably try to start a conversation about actual sushi, what her favorite type is, etc. I've never seen someone this obsessed with porn that doesn't have a mind quick to land in the gutter.

And to add to that, he is so retarded and gone from reality that it seems impossible for him to be offended or embarrassed.

I'm not sure he has even clued in yet to everyone laughing and cringing at his antics despite being flooded with people openly mocking his dumbass when he enters Phil's chat.

 

[Iron Father]

All the mockery and the one thing I've seen so far that upsets him is people mispronouncing his name (and it's him mispronouncing it in the first fucking place).

 

[Paladin Derich]

 

[DSP_Fat_Man]

 

[Manbost]

*Derich being a sex pest*

It's kinda hard to distinguish those two items of clothing, I always get them mixed up sometimes too.

 

[An Avenging Bird]

View attachment 1985171

I can't believe this kid tweets publicly the way some perverted boomer in 1997 would AIM chat at 4 am while the wife sleeps

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

Derich nooooo

 

[N0thingICanDo]

View attachment 1985171

Imagine if he actually gets the invite to the industry

Luna Mills:
@derichlovestsm since you always comment and gave me shout out, do you want to trial for a scene with me and my team for our new project "play with the virgin"?

Derish:
@lunamillsxxx massive shout out for inviting the extremely beautiful and cute me to your show! I always dreamed that my first sex is with a Virgin, cant believe it will cum true!

Luna Mills:
Ugh @derichlovestsm you are going to shoot the scene with me, and I'm not a Virgin *wink*

Derish:
Ohhhh #lunamillsxxx you mean I will be having sex with you but you are not the virgin, thank you for clarifying! So who is the virgin then?

Luna Mills:
@derichlovestsm you.....?

Derish:
Ahhhh you mean you are not the virgin but you will be playing with me who is the virgin! That makes sense because I never had sex before! Can I invite my friend @theycallmedsp as a guest to watch our shooting? He has good experience jacking up on a screen for people to watch as well, and he is a cool streamer!

 

[WolverineGuy22]

View attachment 1985171

This was actually a wholesome interaction until D-Man had to be a pervert at the end.

 

[Sugar Puppet]

Imagine if he actually gets the invite to the industry

Luna Mills:
@derichlovestsm since you always comment and gave me shout out, do you want to trial for a scene with me and my team for our new project "play with the virgin"?

Derish:
@lunamillsxxx massive shout out for inviting the extremely beautiful and cute me to your show! I always dreamed that my first sex is with a Virgin, cant believe it will cum true!

Luna Mills:
Ugh @derichlovestsm you are going to shoot the scene with me, and I'm not a Virgin *wink*

Derish:
Ohhhh #lunamillsxxx you mean I will be having sex with you but you are not the virgin, thank you for clarifying! So who is the virgin then?

Luna Mills:
@derichlovestsm you.....?

Derish:
Ahhhh you mean you are not the virgin but you will be playing with me who is the virgin! That makes sense because I never had sex before! Can I invite my friend @theycallmedsp as a guest to watch our shooting? He has good experience jacking up on a screen for people to watch as well, and he is a cool streamer!

That's definitely on point for how Derich would react if in some strange alternate reality he was ever put in that situation. I definitely got a good laugh from it.

Has Derich ever tagged Phil in one of those porn tweets? If (Or when considering how bad he's getting) worlds collide and Derich starts trying to get Phil involved in his cooming addiction we might get some serious comedic moments. Imagine if Derich started spamming porn related questions in the stream chat over and over like he's been doing lately for songs and random 'this or that' questions.

'What's your favorite porn studio Naughty America or Brazzers?'

'Have you ever heard of Blacked?'

'Do you watch porn with Kat on your day off?'