- Joined
- May 6, 2020
Late as fuck but want to add my banter...see the difference is your spouse cares about you and likes you not just because of your money.
DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion
- Thread starter A Witty Name
- Start date
- Status
- Joined
- May 24, 2020
So she's afraid of catching the 'rona and she's too tired to shop for an hour (who the fuck grocery shops for a fucking hour?) after she's done working at the grocery store, BUT she's not afraid of catching the 'rona and going to we presume the same grocery store she works at during her day off?
Makes perfect sense if you don't think about it.
- Joined
- Mar 4, 2021
he really is a pre-teen girl stuck in an unhealthy 60 year old's body that belongs to a 39 year old...
the birthday week and that "take" on Monster hunter, it sucks cause it's not virally popular on social media. Its like his online existence hinges on just the twitter trending tab, pretty sure this guy is a few months from a mental break down cause some one cheered taylor swift sucks.
He seemed to have "forgotten" the game is coming out again with his "NOTHING is coming out this year" tard-take.
with ASW in a round about way confirming an open-beta 2 and how DSP is as predictable as the sun I see 3 ways this could play out.
SPOILER: every scenario he drops the game claiming it's over hyped, only paid shills praise rollback and it's not a real fighting game.
Excuse the TSM...
Scenario 1
Memory holes the entire game, ignores he said he'd play it which he did when he claimed he would play the first open beta then ignored any mention of the beta and made some DSP excuse as to why he didn't want to try it when the OB was happening. Pretty sure he knew FGC personalities from the small Doto and Crofts to big names like Sajam, Max and Wong were playing so like fightcade any excuse not to get bodied by people clearly better than him. Also pretty sure even his whales would not listen to phil when his expert opinion clashes with the likes of Sajam or max.
Game comes out in june so that's the Autistic Gaming Season so he'll pass on it but still have these take from twitter that are from the first closed beta or the lobby system. fuck, I'm around DSP's age and I mean I wouldn't even think of a hard core gaming season was a thing, even when I was a kid and my friends and I did stupid things like had our own notebooks for hints, drawn maps, passwords and running tally of games we beat. anyway...
Pretty sure another reason he won't play it cause that one part of his brain that still has a grip on reality and like megatron about to be yeeted off astrotrain by starscream pleads it still functions, that part knows that if he plays a fighting game not against bigger names but at the same time just watching him play vs them play will show how truly bad he is.
Scenario 2
Plays the second open beta. Pretends to be max and spends an entire at lease night stream in training mode completely avoiding Gio and Ram (Ino but I think they said she wouldn't be in the 2nd beta), Settles on Ky cause he's the closest to a SF character.
Pretends to like it cause thats all the people related to the FGC will be talking about on twitter so it's his next day stream. Complains about the story mode not being in the beta complete with arrogant goat laugh. After like an hour of stalling he finally does his tower placement matches. shit talks literal bots saying how they aren't bots, cause remember bots can't jump.
gets in around floor I'd say at worse 4 at best 7, in my experience floor 6 is where people stop doing unsafe moves on wake up and know how to block and well we've all watch DSP play fighting games. After about an 20 mins of making his lobby avatar and laughing about the sprite look to them, complains about the tower lobby, same complaints people have brought up since the closed beta but acts like he is the first person to say these things in this game he just played...like I said predictable.
Bodies the first few people, Trolls with names like Khetgotblacked appear in his lobby. Cries that ASW isn't making a lobby system specifically for him therefore the game sucks. Goes back to the game now with the mindset the game sucks, gets bodied hard claims it's lag. When people in chat tell him about GGPO, tells them no he knows better the ping numbers are a lie; memba when frames in DBFZ were lies cause he could see the frame delay. Gets smacked down to a lower floor where he bodies people. Gets made fun of for getting egotistical about bodying noobs. Goes on some retarrrrrrwheelchair unhinged rant about ASW and how anime fighting games aren't real fighting games and that whole by the books DSP rant about how it would play off line as he hasn't played a fighting game off line in like a decade.
Game comes out, never picks it up. Claims no one wanted to see him play it even though like MHR chat actually did want to see him play it. People who got in the OPEN beta are shills who are so much better at the game than he can be cause he didn't play the betas. Complains about lag saying people who say rollback is like playing offline are just paid shills and he tells it like it is, immediately backpedals mid sentence as he see people in chat talk about max praising the game as many know DSP wants so badly to be max it's not even funny.
Scenario 3
Same as 2 but it had "good support" (tips) so he picks it up, or OIC gifted it to him. Spends a WEEK on the story mode getting very uncomfortable around Gio, Ram, Ino and Nagoriyuki. Then repeat the beta experience, to the point of where you could just watch the archive and get the same shit. Has some clout chasing takes on twitter that OFC are going to go against what everyone else is saying, they go over as well as his takes usually do.
Drops the game cause the same reason he drops every fighting game, he's not bad the game is bad and unbalanced laggy pos that plays nothing like it would off line.
.....
ugh now I'm going to take a rose wood shower cause I think I just wrote DSP fan fiction...thats won't be fiction and I'm not a fan...
the birthday week and that "take" on Monster hunter, it sucks cause it's not virally popular on social media. Its like his online existence hinges on just the twitter trending tab, pretty sure this guy is a few months from a mental break down cause some one cheered taylor swift sucks.
He seemed to have "forgotten" the game is coming out again with his "NOTHING is coming out this year" tard-take.
with ASW in a round about way confirming an open-beta 2 and how DSP is as predictable as the sun I see 3 ways this could play out.
SPOILER: every scenario he drops the game claiming it's over hyped, only paid shills praise rollback and it's not a real fighting game.
Excuse the TSM...
Scenario 1
Memory holes the entire game, ignores he said he'd play it which he did when he claimed he would play the first open beta then ignored any mention of the beta and made some DSP excuse as to why he didn't want to try it when the OB was happening. Pretty sure he knew FGC personalities from the small Doto and Crofts to big names like Sajam, Max and Wong were playing so like fightcade any excuse not to get bodied by people clearly better than him. Also pretty sure even his whales would not listen to phil when his expert opinion clashes with the likes of Sajam or max.
Game comes out in june so that's the Autistic Gaming Season so he'll pass on it but still have these take from twitter that are from the first closed beta or the lobby system. fuck, I'm around DSP's age and I mean I wouldn't even think of a hard core gaming season was a thing, even when I was a kid and my friends and I did stupid things like had our own notebooks for hints, drawn maps, passwords and running tally of games we beat. anyway...
Pretty sure another reason he won't play it cause that one part of his brain that still has a grip on reality and like megatron about to be yeeted off astrotrain by starscream pleads it still functions, that part knows that if he plays a fighting game not against bigger names but at the same time just watching him play vs them play will show how truly bad he is.
Scenario 2
Plays the second open beta. Pretends to be max and spends an entire at lease night stream in training mode completely avoiding Gio and Ram (Ino but I think they said she wouldn't be in the 2nd beta), Settles on Ky cause he's the closest to a SF character.
Pretends to like it cause thats all the people related to the FGC will be talking about on twitter so it's his next day stream. Complains about the story mode not being in the beta complete with arrogant goat laugh. After like an hour of stalling he finally does his tower placement matches. shit talks literal bots saying how they aren't bots, cause remember bots can't jump.
gets in around floor I'd say at worse 4 at best 7, in my experience floor 6 is where people stop doing unsafe moves on wake up and know how to block and well we've all watch DSP play fighting games. After about an 20 mins of making his lobby avatar and laughing about the sprite look to them, complains about the tower lobby, same complaints people have brought up since the closed beta but acts like he is the first person to say these things in this game he just played...like I said predictable.
Bodies the first few people, Trolls with names like Khetgotblacked appear in his lobby. Cries that ASW isn't making a lobby system specifically for him therefore the game sucks. Goes back to the game now with the mindset the game sucks, gets bodied hard claims it's lag. When people in chat tell him about GGPO, tells them no he knows better the ping numbers are a lie; memba when frames in DBFZ were lies cause he could see the frame delay. Gets smacked down to a lower floor where he bodies people. Gets made fun of for getting egotistical about bodying noobs. Goes on some retarrrrrrwheelchair unhinged rant about ASW and how anime fighting games aren't real fighting games and that whole by the books DSP rant about how it would play off line as he hasn't played a fighting game off line in like a decade.
Game comes out, never picks it up. Claims no one wanted to see him play it even though like MHR chat actually did want to see him play it. People who got in the OPEN beta are shills who are so much better at the game than he can be cause he didn't play the betas. Complains about lag saying people who say rollback is like playing offline are just paid shills and he tells it like it is, immediately backpedals mid sentence as he see people in chat talk about max praising the game as many know DSP wants so badly to be max it's not even funny.
Scenario 3
Same as 2 but it had "good support" (tips) so he picks it up, or OIC gifted it to him. Spends a WEEK on the story mode getting very uncomfortable around Gio, Ram, Ino and Nagoriyuki. Then repeat the beta experience, to the point of where you could just watch the archive and get the same shit. Has some clout chasing takes on twitter that OFC are going to go against what everyone else is saying, they go over as well as his takes usually do.
Drops the game cause the same reason he drops every fighting game, he's not bad the game is bad and unbalanced laggy pos that plays nothing like it would off line.
.....
ugh now I'm going to take a rose wood shower cause I think I just wrote DSP fan fiction...thats won't be fiction and I'm not a fan...
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2018
- Joined
- Jan 8, 2020
Lol she spends all day in the store, I guess coronavirus only infects people while they're shopping?
Also the cheer said little by little not a full hours worth of shopping.
I despise how slimy Phil is when he answers stuff like this.
DiabeticSP
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 16, 2017
Only Phil would read "pick something up to make dinner from the grocery aisles" as "spend an hour plus getting groceries for but not longer than one week exactly"
Dude seems honestly perplexed not everyone buys exactly 7 days of food at a time.
- Joined
- Aug 10, 2019
lol. This retard has no idea what to do when he's backed himself into a corner by his own clear and utter bullshit. Lie better Phail. We know she's not there anymore.
No. He knows exactly what everyone else is saying and can't stand that they're right.
Why isn't corona an issue when he goes out to eat or walk around a store?
Last edited:
YokuNama
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Nov 27, 2020
I know this is just all bullshit from the top of his head but can't stay and pick up groceries because of COVID?
She's either cashing, bagging, or stocking. Her job requires her to touch 100's of items a day. Don't think an hour is going to make a difference when you work at the worst job to work during COVID outside of a hospital.
As far as being exahusted... SHE'S WALKING DISTANCE AWAY FROM HOME. WALKING DISTANCE. I understand if she had to sit in traffic, lord knows I've been there, but he acts like she's going to pass out at the end of every shift.
And I imagine the people he banned probably realized bullshit when they heard it.
Yup.
PieceofShet
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2017
DSP complained that the sun shines to his office and its really hot in there.
"there is nothing I can do".
There is a million thing you can do you retarded.
"there is nothing I can do".
There is a million thing you can do you retarded.
- Joined
- Oct 25, 2017
I particularly like how he internally translated the part of the question that says " bring groshrees home little by little..." into pig-latin to be "since your wife *thumbs toward door* slaves away for hours and hours on end, toiling away in retail...why don't you just ask her to do ALL THE WEEKS WORTH OF GROSHREE SHOPPING EVERY DAY SHE WORKS." Fuckin' hell, the REAL excuse is that she wants to rush home to play with the actual cat and build more stuff onto her homesteads in Hearthfire.
In the same way that the wuflu is ONLY contagious at restaurants before you sit down at tables. Once you sit, the covid can't fit.
Coupled with the air circulation system in stores not exactly being up to snuff, and tons of people wearing chin-straps and sneezing into the open air... Yeah, taking 5 minutes to grab a jug of gin is gonna just wreck everything.
Absolute autistic fuck. Can't mess with the schedule for 5 minutes, unless he's waiting on whale tips to come in during OT.
ShitheadKiwifarter
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Mar 30, 2021
Could it be possible, that the reason Dave is so paranoid is because he knows he is fucking people out of so much money and he knows that they are not of a sound mind, so it could be possible that someone, such as OIC goes off the rails and finds Dave and does something drastic? It could be that in the back of Daves mind, he knows this and is deathly afraid of his "fans" because if they ever found out and came to accept the truth and extent of his lies, that they could go full tard and show up at his house? Just my hypothesis.
PieceofShet
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2017
Guys, ive got a problem and i need your help. I was doing "if you think about it" and now my head hurts cause i cant explain...
Why dsp has a "stolen credit card" jif notification.? Does he thinks chargebacks are funny? Or in general someone stealing someones money funny? Everyone who tips that ammount chargebacks? Dsp wants people to chargeback?
I dont get it.
Why dsp has a "stolen credit card" jif notification.? Does he thinks chargebacks are funny? Or in general someone stealing someones money funny? Everyone who tips that ammount chargebacks? Dsp wants people to chargeback?
I dont get it.
- Joined
- Aug 10, 2019
Only logical explanation is that you are a shitbag on the same level of a thief if you tip so little.
- Joined
- Nov 20, 2020
Or, like everything he claims to do, is veiled under tons of hyperbole.
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2018
Who the fuck tipped DSP $281?
- Joined
- Jul 13, 2020
OIC (anon). He's the only paypig who doesn't 'want' the attention, he is always hiding his name from the subs leaderboard, tipping under aliases, changing names. The rest like to be the known as the degenerates that support Phil.
edit- "thanks for the $481 but it's too hot to wear the sonic hat. "
- Joined
- Mar 22, 2021
Crooked 16th
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jan 29, 2019
Put your tax return in crypto 
's not Phil
's not Phil
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2018
The best part is that DSP will still complain if the night stream is slow.
- Joined
- Jun 5, 2019
$500 still isn't enough for the hat to be put on. Is ac such a rare commodity for him?
- Status