Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Positron]

Bobby managed to get fatter.

 

[UserAccess]

Bobby managed to get fatter.

Seated together, they look like the Michelin Man's nutsack.

 

[Adamska]

On the note of Transformers, it also dawned on me. MechaGodzilla being built by humans in order to surpass and supplant the Kaiju, only to end up being hijacked by the mind of the previous main villain whose DNA was pivotal to its creation? That's almost one-to-one Galvatron from Age of Extinction(!).

Why on Earth would you draw inspiration from that film of all fricken things?

Because the writers strike over a decade ago broke the union's back and now any fucking retard who works cheap is given the script's duties.

Also did Bob watch this multiple times? It feels like he is. Is he going to stalk the ladies in this film too and maybe snap hard enough to try and Hinckley the Orange Man? Because it feels like he found god with how he fucking acts with this film of explosions and monster punches.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

Bobby managed to get fatter.

Bob looks like he weighs 400 pounds here, and it's still absurd that despite his head being very round he still has those sunken in cheeks.

 

[ditto]

Bob looks like he weighs 400 pounds here, and it's still absurd that despite his head being very round he still has those sunken in cheeks.

Chris looks like he's bulking up. Maybe he thinks putting on pounds will help his Patreon.

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

Yeah, Korea really seems like a pretty vindictive country. That one screenshot just goes to further show how much they are in that regard, and how easily they find amusement in it.

Gotta say, it makes me really embarrassed of my heritage, given all the really bitter things that the Koreans have said regarding Japan and the like. Seriously, wanting tons of innocents dead just because of things that happened almost a century ago? Okay yes, Japan should own up to their past, but hatred and the like isn't going to do that. If anything, it'll make Japan less willing to apologize, as why would they want to do so to a country that clearly hates them so much?


They get so enthralled by all the technology and the like that they tend to overlook just how crappy the living conditions in those dystopias truly are.

IIRC with the Japanese comfort women issue, a lot of it is how the Japanese deny the crime on top of their denial.
Its one thing to be like "no that never happened, lies! you're making it all up!", but the Japanese have instead insisted women who were largely sex slaves (many who were either raped to death or 'liquidated' prior to allied capture) were in fact actually willing prostitutes.

Its like the Japanese are admitting they raped your grandmother, but saying instead she's a whore who volunteered to be gang-banged by horny IJA & IJN personnel.

Bobby managed to get fatter.

These two take worse care of their beards than they do their arteries.
My god I have seen better grain out of wild brair patches than the abomination of facial hair they have growing mad from their chins.

 

[Positron]

How come these fuckers aren't using disposable masks? Gross.

 

[Mr Snek]

Sure, I can see that, but now that the monsterverse word pops up, I must ask: why does "cool monsters fighting" need to be a 'verse? I don't think anyone actually wants a story arc that runs 22 fucking movies long out of that premise

Exactly, the "monsterverse" was really just a western remake of a bunch of the more popular parts of the old movies, which were recognizable enough for even the biggest normies to pay attention to. Now that Godzilla vs Kong is done there really is nowhere for the series to go and the popularity with the general audiences is gonna dip if they try and keep going. Bit of a shame that they got all pretentious and shitty towards the end, because I thought Godzilla 2014 and Kong Skull Island were pretty good. I kind of look forward to Bob desperately sucking the monsterverses dick as they crash and burn.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

I like how in the car Moviebob just kept interrupting Chris and went on a tangent about how much he hates the Sonic movie once Chris mentioned he likes it and apparently the two were referencing the Mario movie by quoting Dennis Hopper in the movie theatre.

Bob also seems to only make really retarded expressions that makes him look like he has Down syndrome.

 

[Vida]

 

[Brother Wind]

(Lefties savage enough to come to the Farms excepted, of course.)

Thanks youre pretty cool too.

I shouldnt be surprised he believes in that fucking Green New Deal trash. Like I have never seen a more useless bill.

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

These are the kind of people who will tell you that a population boom will lead to mass starvation, even though working with even primitive farming tools, more farmers means more manpower for farming and more food being produced, and if you have mechanized farming, one farmer can feed a thousand people.

In my experience, people who are concerned about overpopulation are invariably using it as a stick to beat some group, be it religious people, non-whites or the working class, with.

At some point you go, "I agreed to a film about a giant ape, the ridiculous shouldn't surprise me."

That's pretty much how I view capeshit. I don't watch Marvel films because I'm expecting an intellectual discussion on philosophy or whatever, I watch them because I want to see a guy with superpowers beat the shit out of another guy for 90 minutes.

If you pretentiously insist that capeshit is something it isn't or obsessively watch it despite being over the age of 10, you're almost always a soyboy.

Thanks youre pretty cool too.

I shouldnt be surprised he believes in that fucking Green New Deal trash. Like I have never seen a more useless bill.

Spoiler: politisperging

The problem I have with the Green New Deal is that its supporters believe it will magically fix every problem there is in society but don't say how it will do that.

I have seen people say it will preserve Indians' rights, get us net zero by 2030, give everyone a ”good job”, and various other nice sounding things, but none of these people can tell me how it will work beyond ”tax the rich”.

A president is supposed to unreflectively recite premade slogans. These idiots are easily impressed.

Let's not pretend that tweet was written by Joe Biden, or that he even knows what to say about troons.

> pass... [the] Green New Deal

Interesting. Unless me and Blob are thinking of different things, the copy of the GND that I have open in another tab has ”create millions of high-waged jobs and ensure prosperity and economic security for all people of the US” as one of its goals.

Now let's see what Bob has to say about jobs.

Every country has always looked out for its own people before helping others. America not doing that will be its downfall.

If Bob rented out the space in his head he lets Peter Coffin and June Lapine use for free, he'd be able to buy as many heckin nintenderinos as he wanted.

 

[LightDragonman1]

IIRC with the Japanese comfort women issue, a lot of it is how the Japanese deny the crime on top of their denial.
Its one thing to be like "no that never happened, lies! you're making it all up!", but the Japanese have instead insisted women who were largely sex slaves (many who were either raped to death or 'liquidated' prior to allied capture) were in fact actually willing prostitutes.

Its like the Japanese are admitting they raped your grandmother, but saying instead she's a whore who volunteered to be gang-banged by horny IJA & IJN personnel.

True, they really need to just come on out and admit their past mistakes. Granted, some of the women were probably indeed willing prostitutes, but that still doesn't invalidate the fact that many were indeed unwilling and were horribly raped and even murdered.

With all that said however, I still can't help but shake my head whenever I see Korea act so vindictive and hateful. Like I said, all it does is make Japan far less willing to actual admit any wrongdoing, and again, it makes me feel extremely ashamed and embarrassed to have that heritage.

Back on topic. Wonder why Bob likes these Monsterverse movies so much if they share similar problems to the Bay Transformers films?

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

View attachment 2048222
View attachment 2048239

View attachment 2048246
View attachment 2048248
View attachment 2048254

 

[Bolo]

Back on topic. Wonder why Bob likes these Monsterverse movies so much if they share similar problems to the Bay Transformers films?

It's because he can flex his Godzilla wikipedia bullshit on twitter, same reason on why he likes recent marvel stuff that like Wanda vision that just crams easter egg shit to generate click bait, and Robert plays into that, he acts as if he gets what the writters are doing, and how he can predict how these movies will go, because he is so knowledgeable about that, etc etc etc.

And to cut Robert some slack, he isn't the only loser that does that on twitter, neither is something recent. This nerd pandering crap was rampant during a good portion on comics during the early 2000's, and the readers that were into this mentality of "I know, that, i recognize that, I can call how this will go" gives place into "i can write comics as well" and then you get the shit writers of the middle 2010's, self-satisfied fans who don't excersise self criticism hard enough to make their stories worth a damn.

And now we have the movie version of this shit. remember: Robert thinks he is just in transition of getting his big break into moviemaking, and fancies himself as a script writter and that his critic gig is just a stepping stone.

And in a weird way, these Marvel and monster movies give some validation to people like Robert who think they can write just like that, because they also "get it", and it also serves as another delusion Robert has: that he belongs to a creative, enlightened class: "Why yes, it's a silly monster/capeshit movie, but it is also a fundamental building block of our zeitgeist, and "I" understand it better than most."

Robert ain't hard to understand, just see that most of his thinking comes from two obvious places, self servicing apreciation of what makes him feel better than others and resentment to anything he can atribute blame for not having what he feels he deserves, but without being overly obvious about it.

And by what Robert "deserves" I don't mean that superior future robot body nonsense, not even he belives this bullshit, what Robert wants is money, fame/respect and pussy.

That is it really.

 

[Ita Mori]

It's why they dropped the Wii-U so quickly.

5 years isn't exactly "quickly". It's pretty much the average lifespan of a Nintendo console.
NES 1985-1991
SNES 1991-1996
N64 1996-2001
GCN 2001-2006
Wii 2006-2012
Wii-U 2012-2017
Switch 2017-

N64, for all that it fucked up, at the end of the day was still pretty damn profitable for them.

Mhm. 32.93 million units. It was even more successful than the GCN, which did 22 million. Only 10 million more than the Wii-U.
People like to bash Nintendo for refusing to use discs as their biggest fuck up in the console wars, but their logic was sound at the time. They simply gambled and lost.
It can be argued they were more autistic in seeing that DVDs were the future and a proven technology, yet instead used minidiscs that held 1/4 the data and cost more to reproduce; essentially repeating the same mistake again and keeping 3rd parties at bay.
But for some reason, the internet really loves Nintendo's retard cube and tends to omit it was pretty much a stinker that was again carried by the more successful Game Boy Advanced systems.
Oh sure, Nintendo tried to make the GCN edgier and more adult by making deals with Capcom, etc., but the damage was done. The rise of online multiplayer only kicked it harder into the ground as owners of a PS2 (the most popular console of the generation) were more likely to buy an Xbox and try out the then-latest novelty of playing over the internet on a console (Yes I'm aware Sega did it first with SegaNet, and that Nintendo had ventured into online play with projects like Satellaview back in the SNES days, but honestly who owned or used that shit?) against their friends and randoms alike, as well as the perk of multi-plats playing and looking their best on an Xbox. Without a novelty to stand out with, having no access to 3rd party titles like GTA 3/Vice City/San Andreas, being graphically inferior to the newcomer and less practical than the reigning champion, the GCN never had a chance unless you like Smash Bros and Mario/Zelda that much.



Ontopic: In a slight defense of Bobert, steaming services tend to use interlacing and have lots of compression artifacts in an effort to lower their data size. I don't care how convenient it is to stream, a good movie is ruined if it looks like it's been smeared with vaseline whenever there's notable movement. If they could stop being faggots and use progressive scanning or bump up the bitrate to blu-ray/local storage quality, then we'd be cooking with gas. Plus, I'm not fortunate enough to have a spare room to turn into a theater room and with kids and a husband constantly on web calls, I can't get a theater-like experience in my living room either. Until the kids are off to college, I still have a use for cinemas.

Edit: Godzilla VS Kong sucked. Looks and is acted out like a Sy-Fy movie. Who's idea was it to hire Mexicans who made their names doing TV soap operas from Mexico's most hated and corrupt TV station as notable cast members? Was there even a single A-Lister in the cast?
Oh yeah, the plot. That sucked a fat one too. Basic and beyond predictable. Plus the PR weasels lied; there is no fucking winner.
Additionally, this movie has nothing to do with the first Kong and Zilla movies in tone and pacing. It's RoboCop to RoboCop 3 in that regard.
If Bob genuinely likes this, he has shit taste and I refuse to believe he is anything but a poser pretending he's a big Kaiju connoisseur because that's what he thinks gets the trannies wet.

 

[Oliver Onions]

Bob is never going to get the comeuppance we all want to see unless he achieves some position of importance first.

Personally, I'm fine with Bob never having the massive fall from grace he constantly sets himself up for.

As has been mentioned before, the greatest punishment for Bob Chipman will always be being Bob Chipman, so I don't care how smug he wants to act on Twitter: He knows just like we do what a total fucking loser he is.

Sure, I can see that, but now that the monsterverse word pops up, I must ask: why does "cool monsters fighting" need to be a 'verse?

I can give you about 22 billion reasons:

Hollywood have backed themselves into the same corner AAA gaming has where now everything they put out costs an absolute fortune to produce so they're basically betting the farm on every single project; trying to capture the lightning in a bottle that was the MCU is the dream for all these creatively bankrupt vultures because it guarantees a consistent revenue stream.

That's why even Disney themselves have been trying, and failing hilariously, to recreate the MCU with Star Wars.

 

[MarvinTheParanoidAndroid]

My only real hang up with big monster movies are the same I have for slashers; too many of them forget that the human characters should at least be kind of okay and with at least 1.5 dimensions to it. I actually squint a bit at people when they demand more monster fights and not mention that issue, because at that point you should just make the fight yourself with the minis.

You can't just come out swinging with your moneyshot because why would I care about the next forty minutes? You need to build up to the payoff.

With Bob, it's fucking hilarious because to see him try really hard to pretend this shit's intellectual at all. He's so desperate to pretend he is a smart smart with a triple digit IQ and a wrinkly brain.

I'm of the opinion that these movies shouldn't try too hard to be smart because that means they'll inevitably veer off into politics, which would just make the giant boxing match unwatchable.

I actually got a chance to watch the movie myself and there's quite a few "men are weak" pot-shots in the movie.

Spoiler: Minimum movie spoilers

There's a guy leading an expedition that involves being around Kong and two female characters call him a coward behind his back because he's afraid of the 100 foot primate apex predator, like any normal person would be. There's a payoff where he does do something brave but the setup was unnatural and heavy handed.

There's also a character duo, Madison Russell and Josh Valentine. Madison is depicted as assertive while Josh is depicted as a soy boy, or rather the other characters treat him like a soy boy and you're expected to go along in that thinking. To run the point of his character home, they have a scene where they talk about fluoride in tap water making people docile, and they nickname Josh "fluoride" in this exchange. Josh is the only character in the movie who gives natural reactions to new developments while the others act like narration-psychics, and that invariably makes him a pussy.

Madison Russell on the other hand acts like an unflinching sociopath with no regard to the safety of others or herself; there's a scene where Josh borrows his brother's van so they can use it and she floors the gas pedal as he's opening the passenger door to get in, either meaning she deliberately put him at bodily risk or attempted to just steal the van, or most likely didn't care about the outcome either way.

The women in this movie have contempt for men and the men are timid and feeble. I would not be surprised if there was originally much more of that and most of it was culled for the final draft, and I'm very glad there's not more of it. I wouldn't even mention it if it wasn't as blunt in spotlighting itself as much as it did.

Of course MovieBlob will interpret this as intended; women are strong, but only in comparison to the herbivore men, except when isolated in context it really just depicts women as reckless and insane. It's telling that the movie synonymizes "strong" with "impulsive." It's actually just about as sexist toward women as it is toward men, which is ironic and hilariously unintentional.

Other than that I have little to no complaints, giant monster boxing match galore with a very pleasant bonus that's very unsubtly hinted at during the beginning. You'll know it when you see it.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Bobby managed to get fatter.

They're going gray. They're only in their forties and they're going gray.

I guess a constant diet of fairly small meals, cheap booze, and eternal hatred of the mayo ghouls prematurely ages you.

 

[instythot]

They're going gray. They're only in their forties and they're going gray.

I guess a constant diet of fairly small meals, cheap booze, and eternal hatred of the mayo ghouls prematurely ages you.

Chris has extra stress. I cannot imagine that any woman, no matter how lump shaped, keeps an ogre like that around without treating them like an ATM and being vocal about why more currency isn't falling out of it