🐱 That Should Have Been Gay

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How often do you leave the theater (back when movie theaters were a thing we did) or watch the credits roll at the end of a film and think, “That was really great! Especially that one incredibly homoerotic scene between those two same-sex actors who absolutely would have sealed the deal if they were a man and a woman!” You know what I’m talking about. You’ll find these homoerotic scenes in so many films.

We’re talking about characters with chemistry so uncontainable that the sheer force of compulsory heteronormativity sends you into a rage. “That should have been gay!” you shout at the sky, hoping someday, somewhere, a Hollywood executive will finally hear you.

We know the feeling.

Here are some of the most homoerotic scenes captured on film in the last decade:​

1. That scene with the jacket in Star Wars: The Force Awakens (2015)​

Not only did we finally get some POC in the franchise, but this first installment of the last Star Wars trilogy set the foundations for a beautiful gay romance between Poe (Oscar Isaac) and Finn (John Boyega). In one scene in particular, after they’ve been separated and then reunited, Poe realizes that Finn is wearing his jacket.

“That’s my jacket,” Poe says.

“Oh,” Finn says.

“No, no, no, no. Keep it. It suits you. You’re a good man, Finn.”

The sexual tension between the two men in this scene — accented by Oscar Isaac’s lip bite — is undeniable. And, it turns out, the actors were also on board. “There was romance — at least I was playing romance. In the cockpit, there was a very deep romance happening,” said Oscar Isaac in 2015.

Sadly, the Disney overlords didn’t see it fit to pursue this relationship, so the duo’s homoerotic scenes were for naught.

2. That beach divorce scene in X-Men: First Class (2011)​

Essentially a story about two dudes finding one another, falling in love and finding themselves in the process, X-Men: First Class has all the makings of a true romance without the actual acknowledgement of the romance. But the scene at the end of the film — Erik Lehnsherr (Magneto, played by Michael Fassbender) holding the wounded body of his best friend and confidant Charles Xavier (Professor X, played by James McAvoy) in his arms, on the beach, as missiles fly all around them.

It is part-war movie, and it would undoubtedly be part-romance if either Fassbender or McAvoy were women.

3. Uh, everything about Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014)​

We would’ve preferred this super homoerotic fan art as the film’s big promo
The movie is essentially called Steve Rogers: Bucky Barnes. Come on.

Every single aspect about this film reeks of homoeroticism, beginning with Steve Rogers’ face breaking through 90 years of HYDRA brainwashing and ending with Bucky Barnes pulling his old friend out of the ocean, knowing he could never truly kill him.

Please also note the sequel, which features even more homoerotic scenes, called Captain America: I Will Do Anything to Protect Bucky Barnes, Including Fighting All the Avengers, which is also referred to as Captain America: Civil War.

4. The hand-holding in Frozen 2 (2019)​

Elsa became a queer icon shortly after the release of Frozen, and viewers were thrilled to speculate on the existence of a lesbian relationship in the follow-up to the film. Of course, there’s no explicit, canonical confirmation that Elsa is either a lesbian or in a relationship with another woman, but the scenes of her and a newcomer to the franchise had us all raising our eyebrows.

If you do a Google search of Frozen 2, the first question that pops up is: “Who is Elsa’s girlfriend in Frozen 2?” (Her name is Honeymaren, by the way.)

5. That “long friendship” moment in Tenet(2020)​

Christopher Nolan’s highly anticipated Tenet is a complex labyrinth of time, espionage and science that may or may not be accurate. That’s all to say … we don’t exactly know what it’s about, but we do know the relationship between the Protagonist (John David Washington) and Neil (Robert Pattinson) is homoerotic enough to pull the characters through time.

The plot, essentially, is about a very long friendship, meeting at the beginning and the ending — which is revealed to us when there’s about 10 minutes left of the movie. It is by far the most interesting aspect of the film.

What are your top “should have been gay” moments and favorite homoerotic scenes of the last decade?​

 
" Waaahhh men are objectifying women in (insert popular form of media here) "

" God these two male friends should totally touch uglies while I vigorously masturbate at the thought. "

God, it's all so tiresome.
 
Fuck. Off. You. Insufferable. Faggot.

I'm gay. I have male friends I do not fuck, and have no interest in fucking. Even very close friends that are like brothers to me. Stop trying to fucking ship people because they have a close relationship.
We need to bring fag drags back, except it's gays like you tying gays like the author of this article to the back of a truck.
 
The thing is, as much as Disney (Four of the five movies described here are Disney, I'm pretty sure) might want to have the films have a shitload of gay sex for SJW points, they can't because the CCP hates fags, and Disney wants those sweet chinabux.
Disney had made their bed and they're now stuck between a rock and an hard place.
 
How often do you leave the theater (back when movie theaters were a thing we did) or watch the credits roll at the end of a film and think, “That was really great! Especially that one incredibly homoerotic scene between those two same-sex actors who absolutely would have sealed the deal if they were a man and a woman!”

Never.

You know what I’m talking about.

Not at all, actually.

You’ll find these homoerotic scenes in so many films.

I don't believe you.
 
How often do you leave the theater (back when movie theaters were a thing we did) or watch the credits roll at the end of a film and think, “That was really great! Especially that one incredibly homoerotic scene between those two same-sex actors who absolutely would have sealed the deal if they were a man and a woman!”
Literally never.

also, isn’t this shit - THIS. EXACT. SHIT. - why people started saying things like “no homo”, which then got all the sane homos mad because as they justifiably pointed out, it is possible to be friends with people without wanting to bend them over a table and raw dog it right in the middle of an Applebee’s?
 
Dont worry im sure all of these glaring issues will be fixed in self published fan novellas you can buy on amazon for 5 cents or less.
 
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Gay people and potheads like to project their preferences onto everyone. Everyone's secretly gay and you just know that cop is totally like, smoking all that shit he takes off of people.

It's pretty entertaining to listen to until it gets old.
 
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Fuck. Off. You. Insufferable. Faggot.

I'm gay. I have male friends I do not fuck, and have no interest in fucking. Even very close friends that are like brothers to me. Stop trying to fucking ship people because they have a close relationship.
Out of curiosity, do you have gay male friends you do not fuck, or are they all straight?

I don't hear much about gay men who aren't AIDs factories.
 
Here are some of the most homoerotic scenes captured on film in the last decade:
Guess the faggot never watched Top Gun. Okay, not "last decade" but pretty much at the top of the all-time homoerotic list. It WILL reclaim its spot at the top when Top Gun: Maverick releases this summer.

 
First off there are only three Star Wars movies so fuck off.

It's called fanservice. Anyone who fujoshidos to Poe and Finn having space buttsex is free to create and consume all the erotic art and fanfiction they please. It has been this way for decades. And likely before Star Trek even though the original series is often credited with starting the fanfic craze.

Magneto doesn't have time for romance. He is master of magnet. Welcome to die.

I don't see what is so homoerotic about that Captain America fan art. It looks like a classic action scene to me.

homoerotic-scenes-captain-america-winter-soldier.jpeg

But hey, not here to kinkshame. If a fan art that looks suitable for the cover of an NES game gets you hot and bothered, who am I to criticize?

I never understood the "Elsa is gay" thing in the first frozen. What the hell did they mean? She and Anna are sisters. Is it because Elsa was hanging out alone in the tundra unmarried or something? And why can't she and Honeymaren hold hands? This is a movie for children. Mainly aimed at little girls. Don't girls still hold hands?

As for Tenet, men can't be close friends unless it also involved hardcore buttfucking and penises hanging out everywhere. Men totally can't be friends for decades unless they have, at least at one point, touched balls.
 
To be honest, The Last Jedi would have played a lot better if they cut Rose and just gave Poe all her scenes, at least there would have been a believable basis for the kiss then. Though any change would make that movie better.
 
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