DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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Somehow, some way, Phil cannot do this. He cannot figure out how to click on schedule appointment. He doesn’t know his own zip code. He still needs a metal claw to help pick things off the floor. He is calling pharmacies at 1 AM and getting confused why nobody is answering.
I don't know why you sound surprised, it takes him 3 streams to figure out how to crouch in most games.
 
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Phil doesn't want to spend a single second away from his streams, it's his source of income you fucking morons.
He really does treat it more like a watchpost than something he does for fun. If he looks away for a MOMENT he'll miss the money dude! Every second he spends streaming is another possibility that someone tips! He deserves that money simply for still being alive, how can he collect money if he isn't there?!
And he can't cut time out of the pre-stream, people might pay him there! Even those his mature fans tip exclusively for gameplay and not for the sake of drama or anything silly like that.
 
Random thought, but do we know if Phil actually has a phobia of shots?

I mean, when was the last time he got a vaccine booster for shit like influenza or the other common shit we all have to get annually/semi-annually?

His need to avoid this harder than confessing he's one of scopely's biggest whales on WWE Champions could just be as simple as that.


As if.

Fucking Wal-Marts that are giving out the vaccine have reported that there are people who are not showing up and so they're able to freely give vaccine to 100% of their staff.

Phil isn't doing fuck all and the fact the system, somehow, was made idiot-proof which is an oxymoron in of itself (because idiots are such ingenious people for how they manage to consistently screw up even the most basic of instructions), makes it clear he's trying to avoid it.

You know what kills your sole proprietorship the quickest Phil? Being fuckin dead.

Bugged life mechanics, nothing he could do.
 
Oh, I'm gonna have to make some popcorn and listen to the next prestream for sure. It's going to be spicier than the average market in Ethiopia back when the Kingdom of Aksum was running the show. The government, politicians, the booksmart nudniks who designed the website, the healthcare system itself and everyone who works in it are going to be subject to an acid-tongued rant full of abuse and slander by the Pigroach Snortlord that we all love (to hate). Everyone will be called an incompetent moron.

Maybe we will see the return of EugenicsSydePhil and he'll rant about how there's "too many useless people in the world with nothing to do and nothing to khantribute", despite the fact that if some madman or some rogue Chinese AI takes the throne of world domination and starts a negative eugenics program, Dave would be one of the first in line to be turned into either organic fertilizer or soylent green.

I'm getting it back now; I'm getting that groove back, I'm getting that vibe back. I'm ready for fun stuff I hope you guys are ready too!

EDIT: Ended up being disappointed, expected a bit more spice...
 
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Fucking Wal-Marts that are giving out the vaccine have reported that there are people who are not showing up and so they're able to freely give vaccine to 100% of their staff.
Phil can't go to Wal-Mart. They might secretly inject him with a syringe they found in the parking lot on one of the bodies of the dead meth heads that died in a knife fight against the crack heads. Also, there may be a black person in the building.

It's interesting watching this unfold because we're used to hearing the same panic, excuses, misinformation and vagueries in crisis situations that are actually less public. We've heard the same kind of ramblings about taxes, Kat's schedule, doctor's appointments, orders on things like the PS5... the difference is that this time, all of the information is publicly available. We're seeing here that Phil can't seem to search for information, he can't read or follow instructions, he can't problem solve, and he can't make very simple plans, all the while refusing to acknowledge that people around him can and are.

We obviously see all of this with his gameplay, but this really highlights that he can't function off stream as a human being either. There's no reason not to think that every story about his taxes and the tax guy is not subject to the same spastic exaggerations and histrionics.

We're live on stream and Phil is lecturing his audience. He says they're starting to 'depend' on a couple of generous individuals who come by to support the stream, particularly when it comes to the sub goal. It's not right, and it's not their responsibility to do that. Then why is the sub goal based on the inflated sub count caused by one individual? It's unfair that the rest of your audience has to maintain the 200 gifted subs from OiC and give another 100 on top of that.

Pretty much confirming that he is getting bothered by the fact that his streams are entirely dependent on a handful of whales. It's the culture you built, Phil.
 
Would it be pozzing negholes if some farmer went out to the WA website and scheduled an appointment for the poor piggie? Just put in his phone number and email for the appointment reminder and he'll have it. Would be quite ungrateful for him to not show up and waste a dose.

edit: fucksake it took me 30 seconds to use the Washington site and found Kaiser Permanente has an open form for non members to sign up for the vaccine. Phil, if you're reading this go
here and stop bitching.
 
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Would it be pozzing negholes if some farmer went out to the WA website and scheduled an appointment for the poor piggie? Just put in his phone number and email for the appointment reminder and he'll have it. Would be quite ungrateful for him to not show up and waste a dose.
He wouldn’t use it. Though I think a lot of people would be skeptical of going to something they didn’t book themselves. But in Phil’s world, he would be concerned the detractors hijacked the vaccine and replaced it with something that would kill him so that’s why he wouldn’t show. I wouldn’t pozload my neghole though.
 
I think I figure it out when it comes to what being a machoor adult actually is.
When you are a kid, your parents will force you to do stuff, go to school, chores, going out and play etc etc.

But when you are a machoor adult you don't have parents to tell you anything so you can just ignore it all and lock yourself inside.

Thats what adult life means to Phil, no one can tell you what to do and you should NEVER do anything you don't want to do.
 
I think I figure it out when it comes to what being a machoor adult actually is.
When you are a kid, your parents will force you to do stuff, go to school, chores, going out and play etc etc.

But when you are a machoor adult you don't have parents to tell you anything so you can just ignore it all and lock yourself inside.

Thats what adult life means to Phil, no one can tell you what to do and you should NEVER do anything you don't want to do.
Time to drop this video again.
Shadow the machoor adult hedgehahg
 
Phil'll manage to get in and get the jab, then the tech or whoever will say to come back in 4 weeks for his second jab and get the ever thankful "you want me to do WHAT?! I don't know what my waif's work schedule is, how do you expect me to be free in FOUR WEEKS?!" and then a 20 minute cry fest on stream and no less than 5 tweets bitching about "now I need TWO vaccines?!"
I can already see it. Technnically he doesn't need any vaccine, but its great whale bait for him. He will beg with a 400 tip goal so he can take another day off to get the jab, but instead of actually going, he'll just lounge in his house with wwe champions; blaming car trouble or some shit that will feed into the next tips goal.
 
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