Spiciest Thing You've Ever Had.

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Midlife Sperglord said:
I once tried to prove my masculinity to my friends when ordering vindaloo at an Indian restaurant. When they asked me for a heat level on a scale from 1-5, I asked for a 6. They fucking delivered on that front. It actually was pretty comical, I was munching away at it trying to hide my increasing discomfort at how insanely hot the food was, my friends told me my face turned bright red after a couple of bites and I was sweating pretty heavily, but my masculinity decreed I plow through that dish. My stomach hated me for that.
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If you think a vindaloo is hot, you should try a phall. That dish is insanely hot. I ordered one once from a local Indian restaurant.

I had to leave some of it, couldn't finish the rest. Delicious fun though.

Yeah it will likely give you the shits, too. :unholy:
 
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Stoneheart said:
Authentic thai food. those people are insane, my anus did burn like hell for a week.
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Literally the worst choice I have ever made was when I told the little old lady who runs the thai place to "make it thai spicy". The next day I honestly thought that I would need to get an asshole transplant. It felt like I was being sodomized by a flaming cactus covered in bullet ants.
It was worth it though, that food was fucking amazing.
 
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Grundlejungle said:
Literally the worst choice I have ever made was when I told the little old lady who runs the thai place to "make it thai spicy". The next day I honestly thought that I would need to get an asshole transplant. It felt like I was being sodomized by a flaming cactus covered in bullet ants.
It was worth it though, that food was fucking amazing.
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"Thai spicy" is pretty fucking bad. I grew up on Indian food so I fancied myself to be pretty hard, but some years back there was a Thai place near me that did "Thai spicy" curries. Every time I ate one, I'd go through at least a pitcher and a half of water.

Probably not the hottest thing I ever ate, but it's the hottest thing I don't regret eating for sure.
 
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I have mistakenly used chilli powder instead of paprika when making meatballs and it was catastrophic to my insides and outsides.
I'll never understand people willingly overusing spice to make their food less palatable or straight up inedible. You're not impressing anyone by chasing cheesecake with a cup of lemon concentrate or putting a fistful of salt on your chips.
 
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The Paqui One Chip Challenge really cooked the inside of my mouth like a pizza oven. I constantly had to drink milk.
 
Food truck at work had a Carolina Reaper burrito one day. I like spicy shit so I partook along with another coworker.

I remember someone asking me if I was crying or if something was wrong, and all I could say was "spicy" because inhaling hurt.

10/10 would burn my entire existence again
 
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Solid Snek said:
"Thai spicy" is pretty fucking bad. I grew up on Indian food so I fancied myself to be pretty hard, but some years back there was a Thai place near me that did "Thai spicy" curries. Every time I ate one, I'd go through at least a pitcher and a half of water.

Probably not the hottest thing I ever ate, but it's the hottest thing I don't regret eating for sure.
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I've always heard that Thai food is hellaciously spicy even without any boasting or demands, but most Thai chefs take hearing 'Make it thai spicy' as a shorthand for asking to be utterly fucked up without remorse. I've heard too many 'better' phrases to be sure but sometimes you just want delicious molten pain.
 
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Thai larb. Delicious, but holy shit, I had to guzzle an entire 2-liter of Diet Sprite after eating that.
 
Something to keep in mind is that mustards (wasabi, horseradish) and peppers work along different chemical angles. Peppers have capsaicin, and mustards have allyl isothiocyanate. You can be resistant to one and still be felled by the other (or at least, reduced to cursing and sobbing).
 
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Took a bite of a Carolina Reaper as a dare. I felt like I bit into the depths of hell. I was on the verge of crying and just coughing nonstop. I spent the rest of the night laid back and drinking milk. After that I wasn't able to taste things right for like 2 or 3 days. I love spice, but never doing that again.
 
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Worst thing I ever had was an Indian dish that I can't remember exactly what it was but I requested it to be Indian hot. Thought I could handle it since I could deal with Thai hot but holy fuck, my eyes had never teared up so much in my life. My forehead was soaked for twenty minutes and usually I force myself to finish something regardless but it was so bad, that I just said fuck it to the last few bites left.

Had ghost peppers on two different occasions that were both pretty brutal too.

One was one of those packaged, sun dried ones and my stomach was torn up for about two hours.

Second was this spicy burger that had a ghost pepper jam on it and my lips were numb for an hour and mouth ended up looking like Arnie Grape from "What's Eating Gilbert Grape". The worst thing was that it was during my lunch break for work and when I had to take a shit break later in the day, it felt like streams of lava coming out of my asshole. It wasn't fun going back to work after that.
 
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