Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

This makes me so angry...

That is how angry I feel that Lucas Colby Werner lives like a playboy off of other people's wages.
Lucas is a fat, balding hobo that spends his money immediately on mediocre overpriced food or has it scammed\stolen away. He has not had sex for years. He can't get women to look at him with anything but disgust. His health problems are... myriad. He lives an angry, pathetic existence where he has no real friends and a family that has largely given up on him. He has who-knows how many mental issues, not the least of which is the fact that he's dumb.

That's not living like any playboy I've ever heard of, stimmy bucks notwithstanding. He's not worth the moti.
 
Personally I'd just write "creep" or "bumcel' on the notes and leave them for him to check on later. Shame nobody tried this either


It was funny when he kept trying those phrases long after and it just devolved into him yelling nigger to attract teen girls. I don't know if even Chris Chan got to the point of yelling that for attention
I see those "trans rights are human rights" stickers in my nearest woke city.

Wernwatchers need "Beware:Lucas Werner has a DV conviction" stickers to put on his tarded attraction signs.
 
I was wracking my brain to remember which famous serial killer The Wern reminded me of and finally found the match.


TL;DW Hobo serial killer that murdered several women in his government flat via strangulation and did all sorts of fucked up shit to their bodies. If Lucas were to go killer I think it would be like this guy.
 
Flashback to August of 2019 when Lucas was exploring the club scene and labelled himself the George Clooney of Spokane. I've never gotten over that. But honestly, he was doing a lot better at that point than he is now.
clooney.png
 
For the month of April he got the $1400 stimulus + $794 SSI. Now for May it's another $794. I don't believe his lack of phone is due to him not having the money to walk into a store to get one.


I don't understand this. He has had one job in his entire life, and seems completely comfortable with being a leech. I don't work, I didn't come home right from deployment, and not working eats away at me. How can he be comfortable with living on tard bux? I mean, I know it's because he's a piece of shit, but I still have trouble grasping it. In his "while you were getting everything.." video, he mentioned not having worked since 1999, and he didn't seem bothered by that fact, infact, he seems proud of it.
 
I don't understand this. He has had one job in his entire life, and seems completely comfortable with being a leech. I don't work, I didn't come home right from deployment, and not working eats away at me. How can he be comfortable with living on tard bux? I mean, I know it's because he's a piece of shit, but I still have trouble grasping it. In his "while you were getting everything.." video, he mentioned not having worked since 1999, and he didn't seem bothered by that fact, infact, he seems proud of it.

He's defective.

Seriously, since 1997 I have had one jobless period of 3 months, I got unemployment and, despite knowing that's why things like unemployment exist, I felt just fucking awful every time I had to jump though the hoops to get a check.

I felt like a legitimate failure as a person because I couldn't find work and had to basically beg from the government all while filling out tons of paperwork to prove I was at least trying. I can say without a doubt that it was the most humiliating thing that I've ever gone through: Having to admit to the government that I couldn't manage to adult on my own.

Don't get me wrong, I'm glad those safety nets exist (and have no issues with paying into those systems to help others out) and I'm grateful it was there, it was just...embarrassing.

Lucas has absolutely no dignity; I would legitimately be so embarrassed if I were in his situation that, at the VERY VERY LEAST I'd go completely dark everywhere and focus solely on getting my shit back together--or I'd just off myself, his life is that embarrassing.

He's exactly what people bitch about when they bitch about "welfare queens" and people who are gaming the system and are just lazy fucking leeches.
 
He's defective.

Seriously, since 1997 I have had one jobless period of 3 months, I got unemployment and, despite knowing that's why things like unemployment exist, I felt just fucking awful every time I had to jump though the hoops to get a check.

I felt like a legitimate failure as a person because I couldn't find work and had to basically beg from the government all while filling out tons of paperwork to prove I was at least trying. I can say without a doubt that it was the most humiliating thing that I've ever gone through: Having to admit to the government that I couldn't manage to adult on my own.

Don't get me wrong, I'm glad those safety nets exist (and have no issues with paying into those systems to help others out) and I'm grateful it was there, it was just...embarrassing.

Lucas has absolutely no dignity; I would legitimately be so embarrassed if I were in his situation that, at the VERY VERY LEAST I'd go completely dark everywhere and focus solely on getting my shit back together--or I'd just off myself, his life is that embarrassing.

He's exactly what people bitch about when they bitch about "welfare queens" and people who are gaming the system and are just lazy fucking leeches.


I feel you on the failure feeling. I'm rated at 100 percent from the VA, because PTSD is a bitch. But I cannot view myself as anything other than a failure. Started working under the table at like 14, which funnily enough, was in 1999. I know he's defective and all, but I just can't understand it. All of his behavior, can be traced back to his parents, both biological and step, they enabled him, never held him to a standard, and I'm sure they got him to shut the fuck up as a kid, by giving him food. And while people who will say it's due to his mental illness, and that's a crock of shit. They could've took him to task, by drilling in positive habits and by finding a therapist that taught him how to work through the mental illness and to be a productive member of society. I've seen kids with downs that actually contribute to society, and Lucas is incapable of being a better member of society, but retards can.
 
I don't understand this. He has had one job in his entire life, and seems completely comfortable with being a leech. I don't work, I didn't come home right from deployment, and not working eats away at me. How can he be comfortable with living on tard bux? I mean, I know it's because he's a piece of shit, but I still have trouble grasping it. In his "while you were getting everything.." video, he mentioned not having worked since 1999, and he didn't seem bothered by that fact, infact, he seems proud of it.
THIS.

This is a trait that utterly fascinates me with Lucas. He simply lacks that innate drives to work or do something meaningful.

Even if he blamed his lack of working on his strange twisted view of Marxism, he could put it towards working at a community garden, or just something! It's like he is simply born to consume, consume, consume and never create.
 
I feel you on the failure feeling. I'm rated at 100 percent from the VA, because PTSD is a bitch. But I cannot view myself as anything other than a failure. Started working under the table at like 14, which funnily enough, was in 1999. I know he's defective and all, but I just can't understand it. All of his behavior, can be traced back to his parents, both biological and step, they enabled him, never held him to a standard, and I'm sure they got him to shut the fuck up as a kid, by giving him food. And while people who will say it's due to his mental illness, and that's a crock of shit. They could've took him to task, by drilling in positive habits and by finding a therapist that taught him how to work through the mental illness and to be a productive member of society. I've seen kids with downs that actually contribute to society, and Lucas is incapable of being a better member of society, but retards can.
People have tried over and over to help him, he can’t be helped. I know we like to blame parents but sometimes a bad egg is a bad egg. I don’t think any set of parents could have turned Lucas into a normal, productive member of society.
 
THIS.

This is a trait that utterly fascinates me with Lucas. He simply lacks that innate drives to work or do something meaningful.

Even if he blamed his lack of working on his strange twisted view of Marxism, he could put it towards working at a community garden, or just something! It's like he is simply born to consume, consume, consume and never create.

The only thing he creates are prodigious bowel movements, which may or may not end up in a toilet.
 
Just reviewed the Twigz menu and it is not a cheap place to eat. So, just the place Lucas looks for to go to. It just amazes me that a down and out ragman looks to dine alone in these high end restaurants.

There is a saying that says "poor people make poor decisions". That and "a fool and his money are soon parted" both describe Lucas.

So, he will communicate with a hot zoomer girl on the half hour of Internet time he gets at the public library and then will meet her at Twigz for some dinner, assuming he still has tardbux left? This is soooo exceptional. He is exceptional. He needs to use that money to get a phone and make his memes and videos is what he needs to do.

Lucas can do what he likes with his tardbux, but it's just hilarious to me that he thinks buying these expensive meals is impressive and ups his status in the world.
 
THIS.

This is a trait that utterly fascinates me with Lucas. He simply lacks that innate drives to work or do something meaningful.

Even if he blamed his lack of working on his strange twisted view of Marxism, he could put it towards working at a community garden, or just something! It's like he is simply born to consume, consume, consume and never create.

I mostly agree with this other than the fact he did create those board games. And even if they stink on ice, they are artifacts that prove he can have an idea, and follow through in the creation and completion of them.

Also, (more baseless speculation) maybe Wern has no phone because, after so many times losing and rebuying a new one, his payee suspects he is using this as a grift to get more money than his normal payout allows? Maybe his payee believes he is lying about losing his phone because he does it so much and this time put the foot down and said no more double dipping for a couple hundred extra?
 
Actually, that brings to mind a question: I wonder sometimes, if Lucas finally got his fabled gen Z bae, and it didn't lead to the Nirvana of perfect fulfillment and calmness and sanity that he hopes it will, would he tie his craziness to the next thing coming down the road, or would he completely self-destruct?

That is to say, when it became apparent that his relationship with a youngster was no better than his relationship with Suzanne, would it be the end of him, or would he move on to some new sacred cow?

Actually, I imagine he would probably find fault with the individual, and still profess that gen Z as a group was sacred, and just suggest that he'd found the wrong individual.

So I kind of answered my own question there, whoops. Still interesting to think about though.

Lucas would just say that she had something wrong with her personally.

Lucas does not change his worldview. He rails against the world for failing to live up to the way the world is supposed to be in his head.

On his death bed, he'll utter one final curse to the world for not acting right. Never once considering that he's the one who's warped.
 
I mostly agree with this other than the fact he did create those board games. And even if they stink on ice, they are artifacts that prove he can have an idea, and follow through in the creation and completion of them.

Also, (more baseless speculation) maybe Wern has no phone because, after so many times losing and rebuying a new one, his payee suspects he is using this as a grift to get more money than his normal payout allows? Maybe his payee believes he is lying about losing his phone because he does it so much and this time put the foot down and said no more double dipping for a couple hundred extra?
At this point until he gets back online all we can do is speculate. This is as good a theory as any. I had also considered that perhaps there’s a cap on how many free gubmint phones he can get. He has to have gone through at least a half dozen.
 
Werndrawal.... I too am going through it, and because of this, I've been watching some old Wern videos, and I found myself focusing on his mention of the TV show Friends.

It's interesting; at the beginning Lucas starts off criticizing Friends, because he thinks that the show doesn't show enough literal sex, or enough physical affection, he describes it as "likey-likey", his babyfied way of indicating the superficiality of a relationship that doesn't include deep affection, which was one of his early phrases to indicate a relationship that didn't involve the man constantly having his arm cuffed around the girl's shoulders to prevent her from running away, a concept that he still mentions now.

It's so fascinating to me the way he acts as if the fictional sitcom Friends is somehow indicative, and evidence of, his theory of older man younger woman, because of the relationship between Courtney Cox and Tom Selleck.

It's like, lucas? It's not real! However well they did or didn't get along on the TV show, it's just a show.

Making the Tom Selleck character older was just a way of introducing a foil into the plot, which otherwise relied on same age relationships primarily.

It's just a device to add some variety to the relationships which make up most of the plot focus of the show, right?

And then later on of course, he says that he calls women honey and baby, because all the men on Friends call all the women these nicknames, because they're always a potential mate, which is disgusting, and I don't think was ever the intention on Friends, but that's what Lucas took away from it.

He also mentioned something about the show Friends, no, it was that 70s show, always using the word bitch, and always calling women bitches, which I don't personally remember from that show, I'm wondering if that's more phantom "Voices on the Wind", or what.

Right now, and for the recent past, "voices on the wind" are my holy Grail of Wernography.

This is the subject I most want Lucas to be quizzed about, because I'm entirely uncertain as to how he would deal with it, the only example we have being the very end of the final golden USB podcast, when he acted as if he didn't understand what goldar was talking about, even though there was a brief moment of acknowledgment.

If Cyril ever comes back, I'd be curious to see whether he has any remembrance of Lucas mentioning phantom voices, whether he referred to them as voices on the wind, or the background noise bigots, or something else entirely.

I mean, someone in Lucas's immediate circle, especially his family, must be aware of this auditory hallucination, right?

It's one of the most obvious outward signs of his insanity, beyond his ranting, which he obviously tries to use his political passion to disguise as normal, although that's fairly unsuccessful.

But "voices on the wind".

Lucas, who is such a student of society, although he's an idiot student, who spends so much time watching people, still hasn't figured out that no one else hears "Voices on the wind".

No one else hears or ever mentions background noise bigots.

How has this been possible for so long? Lucas patterns his speech after people around him so thoroughly, picking up bits of slang, explaining that his brother had to teach him how to respond in casual interactions, so much of his activity is copied and played out incorrectly, and yet the Voices on the Wind stand out.

Alone he hears and discusses this obvious red flag of insanity, despite the fact that people who interacted with him personally must have mentioned to Lucas their confusion at hearing him discuss the idea of voices coming out of the ether, right?

This is why the Voices on the Wind stand out, even amongst the library of insanity that he has spewed, as being uniquely crazy.
 
THIS.

This is a trait that utterly fascinates me with Lucas. He simply lacks that innate drives to work or do something meaningful.

Even if he blamed his lack of working on his strange twisted view of Marxism, he could put it towards working at a community garden, or just something! It's like he is simply born to consume, consume, consume and never create.
Has Lucas ever justified why he can't/doesn't work? He mentioned not having a job since 1999 in that one old video but I don't think he tried to justify it at that point, and other than that he just doesn't talk about it, as if it's a complete non-issue. He's admitted to being bipolar and I think that's what he collects welfare for but I don't think I've ever actually heard him use that excuse or any excuse. Other commie cows like ADF will fall back on "working contributes to exploitative capitalism" or whatever but I've never heard him use that one either. I think he's just completely shameless about it, and has so little theory of mind he thinks that if he's not embarrassed then it's not embarrassing. I would be interested in what he would say if a girl he was lusting for asked him the very common getting-to-know-you question of "so what do you do for a job?" Does anybody know if any catfish asked him this or if he's otherwise on the record on the subject?
 
Has Lucas ever justified why he can't/doesn't work? He mentioned not having a job since 1999 in that one old video but I don't think he tried to justify it at that point, and other than that he just doesn't talk about it, as if it's a complete non-issue. He's admitted to being bipolar and I think that's what he collects welfare for but I don't think I've ever actually heard him use that excuse or any excuse. Other commie cows like ADF will fall back on "working contributes to exploitative capitalism" or whatever but I've never heard him use that one either. I think he's just completely shameless about it, and has so little theory of mind he thinks that if he's not embarrassed then it's not embarrassing. I would be interested in what he would say if a girl he was lusting for asked him the very common getting-to-know-you question of "so what do you do for a job?" Does anybody know if any catfish asked him this or if he's otherwise on the record on the subject?
I think he used to defend his unwillingness to work with some more faux-socialist protestations, but recently, as in within the last 2 years, he's made several mentions of wanting to work, and discuss them as if his job was imminent.

He mentioned how working at Barnes & Noble would be easy for him...working at a pot dispensary would be a good fit for him... he mentioned trying to get a job at a convenience store, and I think possibly a few others.

I don't know that that indicates that his opinion about getting a job, or his seriousness about applying, has changed at all, but I think Lucas now realizes that not having a job at his age, and being unwilling to look like he's ever searching for one, is a major detriment that makes him look like a lazy piece of shit.

But it's only occasionally.

When he's in a manic state, he'll proudly scream about how he doesn't need a job. And discuss his Grand plans to be president of the United states. And buy the stock market. And give everyone the ability to buy whatever they want, regardless of money. Never occurs to him that you would have every person in the country wanting to live in a mansion.

Once all the available Mansions are full, how would you decide who has to live in shitty little one room apartments?

If everyone can buy everything, and job payment isn't contingent upon the worth of the job, or supply and demand, how would you prevent everyone from getting a Ferrari and living in a mansion? If everyone could buy everything, then you would still have to decide who got the best stuff. Because obviously the best stuff isn't an infinite supply. Some things are more valuable because of their scarcity, obviously. But Lucas gets drunk on his power fantasy, and doesn't consider the ridiculousness of this, an economics 101 thing, that any reasonably intelligent middle schooler could understand.

So, little from column a, little from column b.
 
I feel you on the failure feeling. I'm rated at 100 percent from the VA, because PTSD is a bitch. But I cannot view myself as anything other than a failure. Started working under the table at like 14, which funnily enough, was in 1999. I know he's defective and all, but I just can't understand it. All of his behavior, can be traced back to his parents, both biological and step, they enabled him, never held him to a standard, and I'm sure they got him to shut the fuck up as a kid, by giving him food. And while people who will say it's due to his mental illness, and that's a crock of shit. They could've took him to task, by drilling in positive habits and by finding a therapist that taught him how to work through the mental illness and to be a productive member of society. I've seen kids with downs that actually contribute to society, and Lucas is incapable of being a better member of society, but retards can.

Maybe I'm cutting his folks too much slack, but Cyril even said that when his folks tried to impose rules on him, he'd go out of his way to defy them. I think he was in therapy for a minute too.

Lucas is just fucking lazy and lacks anything that we would consider to be normal priorities. If a normal person found themselves in Lucas's situation, they wouldn't end up blowing what meager income they have on expensive meals and pot. They'd be trying to find a place to live and a way to make enough money to survive.

Lucas's sole goal in life is to gorge himself and shove his fist inside a teenage girl. Shelter doesn't matter to him.... hell showering and changing his rancid smelling clothes don't matter. The only reason he wants shelter is because he thinks it'll help him score some barely legal pussy.

There's no long term goals here. There's nothing he wants to accomplish with his life. Sure he claims to want kids, but when asked how he'll support them, he just assumes the state will step in and provide for them. As a parent myself, I want my children to have the best life and opportunities that I can provide for them. Lucas doesn't give a shit about any of that. For what it's worth, I question whether children is actually a goal of his, or just his feeble attempt to camouflage his desire to fuck an 18 year old.

People have hobbies and things they enjoy. I love the sense of accomplishment I have after fixing an old piece of shit motorcycle or car. I enjoy the process of figuring out why something isn't working. I didn't labor under the delusion that knowing how to balance the carbs on a 70's Honda would somehow land me in bed with a woman.

Lucas got into board games because, like Chris Chan, he figured it might be a way for him to get a girl. If you look at his collection, he never even played the games he purchased, he just hoarded them and impotently hoped that somehow that would lead to him getting laid.

The only thing that drives him is a pursuit of food and pussy. There's nothing else.

If you don't aspire to anything, then there's no motivation to improve yourself or your situation.
 
There's no long term goals here. There's nothing he wants to accomplish with his life. Sure he claims to want kids, but when asked how he'll support them, he just assumes the state will step in and provide for them. As a parent myself, I want my children to have the best life and opportunities that I can provide for them. Lucas doesn't give a shit about any of that. For what it's worth, I question whether children is actually a goal of his, or just his feeble attempt to camouflage his desire to fuck an 18 year old.
I've said it before, he thinks if he gets himself a wife and children it'll open the door to his father's house and his dad will leave all his money and property to him since he is the one with children.
 
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