WWE Champions General - Despite his claims, DSP is still spending thousands of dollars on the WWE Champions mobile game

[draculapenis]

Hyper jewish move not even other gachashit games do.

Scopely makes even the stingiest gachashit look generous in comparison. I have no idea why these people give them money

Spoiler: actually I do know why people give them money

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

Why can't he play a more enjoyable game like Girls Frontline or Azur Lane.


Oh wait, they are literal waifu simulators but with better gameplay.

I would say Fate/GO and Granblue Fantasy, but he would spend too much time sucking turbo shit at both of them.

Scopely makes even the stingiest gachashit look generous in comparison. I have no idea why these people give them money

Spoiler: actually I do know why people give them money

I said before that Scopely makes Fate/GO (a gacha infamous for it's dreadful rates) look generous and makes Granblue Fantasy (a game known for being insanely generous for gacha standards, I mean ffs, do you expect Scopely to give their players free shit if one of their employees wins a Poker tournament or a Magic: The Gathering tournament) look like Santa Claus.

 

[Canadian Tire]

I would say Fate/GO and Granblue Fantasy, but he would spend too much time sucking turbo shit at both of them.

I said before that Scopely makes Fate/GO (a gacha infamous for it's dreadful rates) look generous and makes Granblue Fantasy (a game known for being insanely generous for gacha standards, I mean ffs, do you expect Scopely to give their players free shit if one of their employees wins a Poker tournament or a Magic: The Gathering tournament) look like Santa Claus.

DSP would love GBF.

All he'd need to do is press Full-Auto and then the game plays itself.

 

[Kosher Dill]

Why can't he play a more enjoyable game like Girls Frontline or Azur Lane.


Oh wait, they are literal waifu simulators but with better gameplay.

Serious answer: because he's a pure, unadulterated gambling addict. He doesn't want gameplay. In fact, all jokes about his homosexuality aside, he probably doesn't even want the sweaty pixels anymore. He just wants another 5 seconds in that gambling headspace where the lights are flashing, the wheels are spinning, and there's a reward dangling just out of reach.

 

[gaarashatan]

Buying accounts is risky now as most accounts have to tie to Facebook now, and cause of that, scopely can lock an account if they sense it’s been bought

so phil has a facebook?

 

[TheGoutburglar]

Serious answer: because he's a pure, unadulterated gambling addict. He doesn't want gameplay. In fact, all jokes about his homosexuality aside, he probably doesn't even want the sweaty pixels anymore. He just wants another 5 seconds in that gambling headspace where the lights are flashing, the wheels are spinning, and there's a reward dangling just out of reach.

Thing is, like with anyone else, he was a non-addict before he became an addict. And it's well-established that his taste, in all things, is complete dog shit. Phil will never fail to fall in love with something of the lowest quality. Just look at his preference for fast food over legit fine dining. You put one of Gordan Ramsey's burgers next to a Big Mac, the pigroach is going for the latter every time. It is no wonder, or coincidence, that he also prefers WWE Champions to the likes of Divinity or Returnal.

This is the perhaps the funniest and most satisfying part of this discovery: how much it confirms Phil to have the lowest standards possible.

 

[We Are The Witches]

so phil has a facebook?

There's at least 2 Facebook accounts that are tied to his emails. (darksydephil@hotmail.com and burnellpp@yahoo.com)

You might have also missed Anonymouse's confirmation on the Discord leaks:
https://kiwifarms.net/threads/despi...-wwe-champions-mobile-game.65126/post-8550686
https://kiwifarms.net/threads/despi...-wwe-champions-mobile-game.65126/post-8550809

 

[Iron Hamster]

so phil has a facebook?

https://www.facebook.com/search/top?q=phil%20burnell

https://www.facebook.com/search/top?q=darksydephil

 

[Collections Agent]

Why can't he play a more enjoyable game like Girls Frontline or Azur Lane.


Oh wait, they are literal waifu simulators but with better gameplay.

PHIL IS MARRIED HE WOULD NEVER

 

[AnOminous]

Scopely makes even the stingiest gachashit look generous in comparison. I have no idea why these people give them money

Spoiler: actually I do know why people give them money

Imagine being DSP. Imagine absolutely utterly ruining your life to buy homoerotic pictures of naked oiled up gay men. To the point you literally have to commit bankruptcy fraud and then keep spending more money on nude dudes.

 

[Freshtodeath]

I really think he thinks adults dont keep savings and spend everything which why he keeps playing this stupid fucking game

 

[Exceptional Chimp]

You're right that there aren't many spenders let alone whales in this game but each of them is spending hundreds or thousands every single week. Phil literally went bankrupt from this game and he isn't even their biggest whale.

So what you're saying is that, in Scopely's eyes, Phil is just a fifty bit bitch!

 

[TheGoutburglar]

I really think he thinks adults dont keep savings and spend everything which why he keeps playing this stupid fucking game

Given the other things he thinks, you may not be far off. His comments about letting kids spend their money frivolously, for example. Or his idea of a rainy day fund. Or his view of a wife being all about cooking and cleaning. Or the way he generally acts like a heel and expects to still be popular, because it happens in wrestling.

Phil clearly got more of his education from entertainment than from schooling, and the rest he just made up because he's stupid.

 

[UncleTusky]

I really think he thinks adults dont keep savings and spend everything which why he keeps playing this stupid fucking game

A few years ago someone in his chat asked him point-blank why he needed more donations if he was already making $120k and change a year. Phil's response was that because he was spending more than he took in, that made him "poor" and meant he deserved help, so stop asking questions and pay up already. That's right in his world personal finance starts with buying as much as you can and savings is something that only happens if there is money left over after that. He really is that retarded.

EDIT:

There have been studies done which show that people who are accustomed to living paycheck to paycheck will blow any bonus or lotto winnings they get because the idea of putting money aside is so alien to them. Phil fits this very well, he's only odd in that he does it with a much larger income and with fewer real obligations (dependents, healthcare) than most people who have this kind of subsistence lifestyle.

I also have two pet theories about Phil and money:

The first is that part of why he bought the WAKhando is that he had enough (at least $30k judging from the down payment) cash on hand that he had no idea what to do with, and his compulsive need to spend that money /flex kicked in. We know he used to flex by buying the most expensive items on the menu at FGC tournies, this is that on a much larger scale. I don't even believe that he cares about the location anymore when he's inside 6 out of 7 days and does not head into Seattle on his serious adult day off. Combine that with how he's clearly miserable and in a rut and I think we'd be looking at another moving/Serious Adult House Saga if he weren't irreparably addicted to gambling.

My second and way less controversial theory is that Phil has literally no idea of how investing and stocks work. I believe he's used the term "investment" to describe the WAKhando and mentioned that his entire retirement plan is "hope it appreciates enough to live off the equity", which only makes sense if you put zero thought into it.

 

[BepsiLight]

I really think he thinks adults dont keep savings and spend everything which why he keeps playing this stupid fucking game

WRONG
He has his rainy day fun set aside so when it's raining and he can't go out with khet to their romantic dumpster trip/grocery shopping adventure he can dump more money on WWE Champions.

 

[Philly May Lyrus]

Imagine being DSP. Imagine absolutely utterly ruining your life to buy homoerotic pictures of naked oiled up gay men. To the point you literally have to commit bankruptcy fraud and then keep spending more money on nude dudes.

Dood. That wasn't bankruptcy fraud it was business related micro transactions and he no longer owns them. Oh, Have you done a Barton Fink avatar yet?

WRONG
He has his rainy day fun set aside so when it's raining and he can't go out with khet to their romantic dumpster trip/grocery shopping adventure he can dump more money on WWE Champions.

He thought they teach this strictly in schools and blamed school when someone corrected his made up/tard definition.

 

[TheGoutburglar]

Combine that with how he's clearly miserable and in a rut and I think we'd be looking at another moving/Serious Adult House Saga if he weren't irreparably addicted to gambling.

That would have actually been more interesting to watch, because it's one thing to have a secret addiction, quite another to be buying another condo when you don't need to. Phil knows not to reveal his investment in mobile games, but having a problem with tons of money sitting around and deciding to do THAT with it isn't something he could hide even if he thought to, which he wouldn't.

Goes to show how embarrassing he knows Champions is.

There have been studies done which show that people who are accustomed to living paycheck to paycheck will blow any bonus or lotto winnings they get because the idea of putting money aside is so alien to them. Phil fits this very well, he's only odd in that he does it with a much larger income and with fewer real obligations (dependents, healthcare) than most people who have this kind of subsistence lifestyle.

I do firmly believe that the norm there would be Phil if he hadn't lucked into an internet career. He's not bad with money because he has always had it, he's bad with money because he's a fucking imbecile. Seeing him lose his six figure income forever would just be poetic justice, it wouldn't be a turning point for him. He's simply too brain-dead for that.

 

[NynchLiggers]

That would have actually been more interesting to watch, because it's one thing to have a secret addiction, quite another to be buying another condo when you don't need to. Phil knows not to reveal his investment in mobile games, but having a problem with tons of money sitting around and deciding to do THAT with it isn't something he could hide even if he thought to, which he wouldn't.

Goes to show how embarrassing he knows Champions is.

I do firmly believe that the norm there would be Phil if he hadn't lucked into an internet career. He's not bad with money because he has always had it, he's bad with money because he's a fucking imbecile. Seeing him lose his six figure income forever would just be poetic justice, it wouldn't be a turning point for him. He's simply too brain-dead for that.

>Lucked
Lmao, Phil deciding that he wanted to be a Jewtuber sealed his fate, he probably would be happier and saner if he got a actual job.

 

[Collections Agent]

To touch on DSPs luck....

Not many people have a crippling addiction problem with hundreds of people on an online forum telling them what a fucking awful and damaging thing it is. In a way, DSP has the strongest support network for his addiction possible and still can't bear to stop dropping hundreds of dollars weekly on GIFs that aren't permanent.... As soon as Scopely sees their profits dip enough and shelves the game, you've nothing to show for your tens of thousands of dollars. Maybe hundreds at that point.

TBH most addicts would consider a thread like this a godsend, hundreds of messages explaining how they're being taken advantage of, why it's a stupid idea, alternatives and solutions.

I'm pretty sure this thread is the one thread Phil probably dosent read because it probably hurts his ego a bit too much to remind himself what a pathetic and addicted person he has become.

 

[NynchLiggers]

To touch on DSPs luck....

Not many people have a crippling addiction problem with hundreds of people on an online forum telling them what a fucking awful and damaging thing it is. In a way, DSP has the strongest support network for his addiction possible and still can't bear to stop dropping hundreds of dollars weekly on GIFs that aren't permanent.... As soon as Scopely sees their profits dip enough and shelves the game, you've nothing to show for your tens of thousands of dollars. Maybe hundreds at that point.

TBH most addicts would consider a thread like this a godsend, hundreds of messages explaining how they're being taken advantage of, why it's a stupid idea, alternatives and solutions.

I'm pretty sure this thread is the one thread Phil probably dosent read because it probably hurts his ego a bit too much to remind himself what a pathetic and addicted person he has become.

The Ego is what makes a lolcow, and also makes them never learn.
I'm pretty sure DSP never had a moment of self-awareness at all during his entire legacy of fail since he actually believes in his own lies.