Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

How much does Ryann weigh?

  • 300-350lbs (Panda Bear)

    Votes: 26 1.0%
  • 350-400lbs (Bull Caribou)

    Votes: 146 5.5%
  • 400-450lbs (Heart of a Blue Whale)

    Votes: 379 14.2%
  • 450-500lbs (Pigmy Hippo)

    Votes: 545 20.5%
  • 500-550lbs (Domestic Pig)

    Votes: 394 14.8%
  • 550-600lbs (Baby Grand Piano)

    Votes: 318 12.0%
  • 600-650lbs (Vending Machine)

    Votes: 192 7.2%
  • 650+ (A Fucking Planet)

    Votes: 661 24.8%

  • Total voters
    2,661
Wavy hair is a thing a lot of people aren't aware of apparently. Those girls have light waves, that's why the curl treatments work, those chemicals tighten the waves up and scrunching your hair up as it dries will give anyone a beachy wave effect. The 90s had us all sleeping in those stupid foam twisty things with wet hair so we'd wake up with curls. Tiktok is so annoying with this kind of thing and Tess certainly fits in.
 
That tiktok^^ is exactly why she never should have said she was diagnosed as having anorexia nervosa. She’s right, people are commenting about her claim and are making fun of it, which does harm people who actually suffer from the illness. If anything she doesn’t eat most of the day then has a sheet cake to herself, plus an extra to fart on. I can see that, especially since Nick isn’t there to feed her snacks constantly.

She stomps her hooves into every “protected” group on the internet, just so she can’t be held accountable. And now Tess gets to make video after video about what a piece of shit you are for even thinking she’s lying, which does make others who do suffer from ED look like a giant laugh.

I see she has barely mentioned her horrible, abusive marriage. Barely mentions being a mom. Where are all of the story reposts of her black friends she claims to be BFF’s with? She’s busy trying to make people believe the madness that comes out her mouth.

I would say let her have her moment, but I do think she’s harming the people who actually suffer from a restrictive eating disorder, so she can just eff off. Can’t wait til she has to vague post traveling 4 hours to Madonna Inn for cake since she now has a restrictive eating disorder.
 
Can’t wait til she has to vague post traveling 4 hours to Madonna Inn for cake since she now has a restrictive eating disorder.
Nah, she's "in recovery". Unnecessarily going out of her way for cake is part of her healing process. If anything, she'd make it a bigger deal than before because she's so brave for telling anorexia to fuck off.
 
She just posted this in follow-up to her "I'm the FAT sibling, the GAY sibling, and the MENTALLY ILL sibling" video:
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Which reminded me that this isn't just a dumb TikTok trend and that she does have a brother, so let's all enjoy his review of her book again, shall we?
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So she admits she chose to tell us she's anorexic. She is so close to self-awareness it's hilarious.
 
I have read every page of this thread. You all have made me laugh countless times.

You've given Ryann many nicknames, but I didn't see "Superwaddle" among them. Admittedly it is not the most creative but it is what came instantly to my mind. It is what she really does in a "super" sort of way, as opposed to modeling. Like you I cannot believe this bitch was ever hired to "model." She never could walk properly, even when she was starting out at a size 26 (the last time she was a 22/24 was in high school), and she is shaped like a potato balanced atop two knock-kneed legs. She's profoundly ugly inside and out and the only people who admire her are people in her image; other deathfats who are narcissistic piles of vaguely human-shaped shit.

I have rejoiced in the hilarious image of her date literally loping off into the night, haunted by the smells his awkward fumbling unearthed. For not one, but two men to turn down sex with her means her hygiene really has hit a sort of event horizon. Men willing to even date her have zero standards so it must have been a smell issue rather than a personality issue.

Jingle bells, Ryann smells.
 
She just posted this in follow-up to her "I'm the FAT sibling, the GAY sibling, and the MENTALLY ILL sibling" video:
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Which reminded me that this isn't just a dumb TikTok trend and that she does have a brother, so let's all enjoy his review of her book again, shall we?
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Does Tad or any of her family have social media where we can see their reactions to her being anorexic. To be a fly on the wall during those discussions :story:
 
Does Tad or any of her family have social media where we can see their reactions to her being anorexic. To be a fly on the wall during those discussions :story:
My guess is that he has an actual life and doesn't spend his time seeking validation on social media. I'm sure anything juicy would have surfaced. I'd be interested in knowing what Ryann's classmates think of her.
 
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I have read every page of this thread. You all have made me laugh countless times.

You've given Ryann many nicknames, but I didn't see "Superwaddle" among them. Admittedly it is not the most creative but it is what came instantly to my mind. It is what she really does in a "super" sort of way, as opposed to modeling. Like you I cannot believe this bitch was ever hired to "model." She never could walk properly, even when she was starting out at a size 26 (the last time she was a 22/24 was in high school), and she is shaped like a potato balanced atop two knock-kneed legs. She's profoundly ugly inside and out and the only people who admire her are people in her image; other deathfats who are narcissistic piles of vaguely human-shaped shit.

I have rejoiced in the hilarious image of her date literally loping off into the night, haunted by the smells his awkward fumbling unearthed. For not one, but two men to turn down sex with her means her hygiene really has hit a sort of event horizon. Men willing to even date her have zero standards so it must have been a smell issue rather than a personality issue.

Jingle bells, Ryann smells.
Superwoddle gets my vote, cheers
 
So what do you guys think it will actually take for her to get “cancelled”? Or at least somewhat cancelled.
I do think that this bullshit anorexic claim is starting to make the public see she’s a lying narcissist.
But this won’t be enough to to actually “cancel” her. I’m wondering what what it will actually take to do her in.
 
So what do you guys think it will actually take for her to get “cancelled”? Or at least somewhat cancelled.
I do think that this bullshit anorexic claim is starting to make the public see she’s a lying narcissist.
But this won’t be enough to to actually “cancel” her. I’m wondering what what it will actually take to do her in.

Don’t you need to be relevant in order to be cancelled?
 
So what do you guys think it will actually take for her to get “cancelled”? Or at least somewhat cancelled.
I do think that this bullshit anorexic claim is starting to make the public see she’s a lying narcissist.
But this won’t be enough to to actually “cancel” her. I’m wondering what what it will actually take to do her in.
Well, in comments to her podcast post on IG she's getting beating for inviting Scientologist
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ETA *Shelly Miscavige is a wife of Head of Scientology, *who were seen last time more than a decade ago, yet still presumed alive.
 
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I have read every page of this thread. You all have made me laugh countless times.

You've given Ryann many nicknames, but I didn't see "Superwaddle" among them. Admittedly it is not the most creative but it is what came instantly to my mind. It is what she really does in a "super" sort of way, as opposed to modeling. Like you I cannot believe this bitch was ever hired to "model." She never could walk properly, even when she was starting out at a size 26 (the last time she was a 22/24 was in high school), and she is shaped like a potato balanced atop two knock-kneed legs. She's profoundly ugly inside and out and the only people who admire her are people in her image; other deathfats who are narcissistic piles of vaguely human-shaped shit.

I have rejoiced in the hilarious image of her date literally loping off into the night, haunted by the smells his awkward fumbling unearthed. For not one, but two men to turn down sex with her means her hygiene really has hit a sort of event horizon. Men willing to even date her have zero standards so it must have been a smell issue rather than a personality issue.

Jingle bells, Ryann smells.
"Superwaddle." I fucking love it. Welcome to the Farms.

So what do you guys think it will actually take for her to get “cancelled”? Or at least somewhat cancelled.
I do think that this bullshit anorexic claim is starting to make the public see she’s a lying narcissist.
But this won’t be enough to to actually “cancel” her. I’m wondering what what it will actually take to do her in.
I think, in her case, it's just going to be a continued slow chipping away at her popularity and already-marginal fame, as she keeps saying and doing stupid shit in transparent bids for attention. As it is, she's almost too much of a joke to bother canceling; nobody takes her seriously.

And unlike other media figures or celebrities, nobody envies her, or any professional accomplishments and success she may have. They might wish they could consoom at her level, but the last thing they want is to be her.

Canceling a successful writer, actor, film director, actual model, journalist, or businessperson is satisfying to the cancel mob because when you get down to it the cancel mob aren't just random people; they're superfluous, unsuccessful members of an over-stuffed bourgeoisie. They're people who grew up and went to college, secure the whole time in the belief that they deserved success and would step right into a comfortable life post-college--only to end up stuck in low-paid, low-status employment because the economy can no longer absorb so many college graduates. On top of that, most are crushed under massive student loan debts they can never hope to repay, which thwarts risk-taking and other means of upward mobility that might be available to them.

To an extent, I can feel bad for the superfluous bourgeoisie who make up the cancelling class, because they got lied to so blatantly, and sold fantasies of success they were never going to be able to make happen in reality. So they're deeply bitter, and consumed by envy of anybody who did succeed. They could strike back against the system that exploited them, and encourage younger people not to fall into the same trap, but for various reasons they won't. So instead, they look for people who have what they believe they are entitled to and have been unfairly denied, and look for reasons to tear them to shreds. They make demands that those people conform to ever-shifting standards of what is acceptable language, and go in for the kill when they don't.

Tess is a big, fat joke. She's an obese, white-trash, high-school dropout who pretends to be a supermodel and has to say increasingly stupid shit in order to get attention on social media. Anybody with two functioning brain cells knows that her life is probably not as great as she presents it, that living in her body is a punishment, and that time is not on her side. Nobody--except other low-class fatties--aspires to be her. Nobody went to college to be Tess Holliday. There is no status envy there, and status envy (I am convinced) is the emotional state that fuels cancel culture.
 
Tess's fans in her comment section are just as stupid as she is. Laura Prepon has been married to fellow scientologist Ben Foster since 2018, so no, shes not the long time girlfriend of Tom Cruise.

Scientology is vile, but at least pick the true stuff to whine about.

Also recommended the underground bunker blog by tony Ortega if you're interested in critical scientology watching

(Edit: came back to clean up some spelling)
 
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Don’t you need to be relevant in order to be cancelled?
True, true. She isn’t really relevant but she still has a very large(lol) following. Also the fact that she got a couple tv appearances for this last stunt means she could still be on the very bottom of the “D list” which is still more relevance than she should have.

Well, in comments to her podcast post on IG she's getting beating for inviting Scientologist
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ETA Shelly Miscavige is a wife of Head of Scientology, whom were seen last time more than a decade ago, yet still presumed alive.
Oh wow, even her own SJW people’s are calling her out. That’s great.
Edit:spelling
 
All of her fans are in a tizzy over the guest being a Scientologist, they don’t realize Tess had no idea who the fuck Laura Pepper was other than seeing an episode of Orange is new black and saw she played a lesbian. Queer points for Tess, don’t they get it?
It’s like all her other guests- I’m sure she was a super fan of Supernanny, im sure she gave more than one ounce of shit about Ricki Lake other than she was in Divine’s presence and lost a husband. Tess doesn’t care who goes on her podcast, I wouldn’t be surprised if her next guest is the barista from her local Starbucks, making sure everyone knows their perfect little waif Tess orders only the most healthy of Starbucks beverages. Bonus points if the barista is a queer dangerhair
 
Don’t you need to be relevant in order to be cancelled?

Well, I'd say yeah, but you gotta remember the IdPol jackass who (are you sitting down for this????) Went through old Playboys and found a 1972 issue with John Wayne being interviewed and the cancel crowd CAME FOR THAT.
His own daughter had to fight against the university that named a theater after him because they were going to remove his legacy. For a NINETEEN FUCKING SEVENTY TWO PLAYBOY ARTICLE.

So, having said that... relevant or no, the real question really is, what is it going to take to get Ryann Helipad to FUCK. OFF. back to the slimy holler she came from.

EDIT: I've always agreed with taking the high road. But years of observation has raised an important question: What good does the high road do when the other side keeps moving the goalposts and refuses to hold themselves to the same standards they hold others to?
 
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