- Joined
- Jan 26, 2018
Los Angeles, California. 2021.
How did we get here?
White Trashville, Florida. February 23, 2009.
Florida woman Mary Barone (born Mary Margaret Woods) was seeing Florida man Kenneth McBride, who had been engaged to fellow Florida woman Roberta Laws for years. Roberta had cerebral palsy and was wheelchair-bound.
Mary had begun dating McBride after her former husband decided to transition into a woman. To this day, Mary remains a staunch supporter of the trans community.
Mary and McBride carried on their affair for months before Mary discovered McBride was engaged. When she went to his house one day, Roberta answered the door. McBride introduced Mary as a friend and caregiver he had brought on to care for Roberta. During the day, Mary cared for Roberta, but was sleeping with McBride in secret. She wanted Roberta out of the picture and told McBride to "get rid of" Roberta.
When McBride didn't immediately oblige, Mary had dinner with her grandmother and McBride. After the meal, she told him she wanted to break up with him because he was still with Roberta. According to Mary, McBride responded by whispering a threat to kill Mary's grandmother, so she got back in McBride's truck.
That night, McBride took matters into his own hands - literally. He called Mary and the two argued about McBride's future with Roberta, with McBride explicitly mentioning possibly murdering Roberta. Mary claims McBride threatened her as well during this argument. McBride told Mary to wait in the car, then went into the house and strangled Laws to death.
After 30 minutes, McBride returned to Mary and told her it was done. He took her inside, where the nude, raped, strangled body of Roberta lay on the bed, her limbs tied to the bedframe. McBride told Mary to get garbage bags from the kitchen, which he then cut up and used to wrap Laws' body. The pair went to Wal-Mart, where Mary purchased a shovel with which to bury the body.
McBride instructed Mary to clean the crime scene while he dug a hole in the backyard for Roberta's body. He then buried the body, and allegedly told Mary she couldn't leave the house or leave his sight if he left the house. She claims McBride cuffed her to the bed during this time.
On March 31, 2009, Mary snuck out of the house and reported the crime. McBride was arrested and Mary was offered to be placed in witness protection in exchange for her testimony.
McBride was sentenced to life in prison without parole on February 17, 2011. No charges were ever filed against Mary, though many (including McBride's lawyer) have argued she should be held accountable for her role in the crime.
(source / archive)
The search warrant and motion to compel regarding the turnover of a computer are attached at the bottom of the thread.
Most of the information and screenshots in this thread can be found in this compilation video from YouTuber Adonis Paul.
Life After Murder
A few years later, Mary's grandmother died and Mary moved into her condo. According to Mary's aunt, when she visited the condo, it was decrepit, with bloodstains on the walls and piles of mess everywhere. After she was forced out of the condo by her aunt and sister in 2017, Mary moved into a trailer on the back of the property. That's when she started making unhinged videos. In total, Mary has uploaded over 1900 YouTube videos, most of which she has deleted during fits of anger against her haydurs. Her hate-followers have re-uploaded many of her best meltdowns, but much of her content has been lost.
2018.
Mary was evicted after failing to pay taxes. She moved to LA to be homeless. For the next two years, she made videos chronicling her honestly terrifying experiences as a homeless woman living near skid row. Regardless of whether or not she was at fault for her circumstances, Mary always manages to find a way to make herself the victim.
Here's a picture of Mary's cart she pushed around when she was begging on the streets of LA:
Here's Mary talking about (and demonstrating) her bathroom habits:
Mary's stories and dates often change and are riddled with inconsistencies; she has given multiple different accounts of the above murder (I referred to official documentation for this thread.) She lived in her truck for years, spending her money on weed and even attempting to grow some. Over the course of that time, she was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, and compounding PTSD. Mary has also claimed to be schizophrenic. She's heavily medicated, but that doesn't stop her from melting down on a daily basis.
In late 2020, Mary qualified for section 8 housing but had to surrender her truck after an incident with the man who held the title to it. The church where she was parked had told her to vacate, and got in contact with the truck's owner. He reclaimed the vehicle after seeing that Mary was spending her days begging for weed and playing old video games on her phone.
2021.
YouTuber Adonis Paul discovered Mary's videos and began chronicling her, delving into her background. He spoke to someone from the church where she had parked, and the person relayed that Mary had threatened self-harm and suicide every time they had asked her to leave. They eventually contacted her therapist, who managed to get her to accept that she would have to leave. According to the church member, Mary routinely begged for donations from the congregants and was a constant presence in the church parking lot.
Mary responded to the various videos about her, trying to justify her behavior. She accused Royce Lopez of Revenge of the Cis and Adonis Paul of sic'ing their followers on her to attempt to sexually violate her and attack her, though they have repeatedly said not to do that:
Much of Mary's disdain for Adonis and Royce comes from the fact that they like to point out she probably should have been charged as an accessory to Roberta's murder.
Despite her erratic mood and troubles with others in the building, she has stayed at the shelter ever since, continuing to make daily videos of her episodes. She claims most of her outbursts are brought on by the barrage of negativity in her comment section.
Her meltdowns have earned her a large hate-following, mainly stemming from Royce Lopez of Revenge of the Cis' frequent coverage of her and Adonis Paul's chronicling of, well, literally her entire life. Even without Royce and the resulting hostility, Mary would still be insane, posting rambling diatribes about getting cancelled out of gig work from Steve Harvey:
YouTube
Mary has no shame. She has talked about defecating in a salad bowl, rubbed mayonnaise in her hair, and watered her attempt at growing weed plants with period blood. Her unhinged videos got the attention of multiple lolcow-related streamers, who began mocking her videos. They delved into her past and discovered her involvement in Roberta's homicide. When their followers began commenting on Mary's videos, a months-long feud erupted, hence the video at the top of this post.
To Mary, everything is a life-or-death issue. She claims that only dying will save her from the ~endless harassment~ she receives. She e-begs, hoping to elicit sympathy from her viewers, the overwhelming majority of which have come from negative coverage of her. Much of the money she gets from e-begging is spent on weed, which she claims she needs to stabilize her mood,
Royce and his equally fat co-host JJ Stoner mock Mary on an almost-daily basis on Royce's YouTube show, Daywave Radio. Mary hate-watches Daywave every day and has begun directly responding to the haydurs. That video can't be uploaded here due to file size. Mary reacts to various other callouts of her bullshit, as can be seen below. She always tries to get people to take pity on her, though anyone who knows her history knows she is simply a chronic beggar:
She has accused Royce and his fans of sending people to violate her:
In April 2021, Mary cut up her benefits paperwork in a futile attempt to stick it to Royce and Adonis Paul. This only resulted in her getting laughed at even more and now being without funds to feed herself, which led to her issuing a feeble apology video to Royce as a desperate attempt to reclaim the money he offered her.
She ended up apologizing to Royce and Adonis Paul when they offered to pay her enough to keep her cellphone on. The cut on her forehead is from her banging her head on a streetlight when she had a meltdown:
Family Drama
After she was kicked out of her grandmother's house, Mary's relations with her family further deteriorated. Her aunt Cathy has gone on Adonis Paul to trash-talk her and refute her claims of widespread familial abuse; Mary's parents weren't great, but the rest of the family seems to be relatively sane. Mary's allegations that her father was abusive to her brother and that her mother was a non-functioning alcoholic appear to be true, but her belief that they're all trying to abuse her and create missing persons claims to harass her is false. Cathy refuses to side with Mary, and has gone on Virgyyy (now banned) and Adonis Paul's shows to discuss Mary. Here's what Mary has to say about her aunt:
Mary has been threatened with legal proceedings (a) by her sister:
Mary has repeatedly claimed her family was abusive, though her aunt has denied most of her claims. Here's what she looked like as a girl (she used to be obese but lost over 100 lbs):
Reactions / Haydur Creations
Mary's online presence has inspired all sorts of fan works from her detractors. Pretty much all of this centers around Adonis Paul and Royce Lopez, and everyone involved uses and shares each other's memes and mockeries in a circle-jerk, but it's still hilarious.
Mary also HATES being called a MERDARURR and will make a video telling you exactly how she feels about it, despite literally being an accomplice in a homicide.
Most episodes of Daywave Radio feature Mary in a voice-over when Royce raids other streamers' channels.
Mary has also claimed to be in "physical danger" (a) because of the online harassment she receives, which could simply be avoided if she ignored it:
Books
Mary has written two short books, both full of typos. The first, titled I'll Never Stop Screaming, is about her struggles dealing with homelessness and trauma. The lack of proofreading, reminiscent of Sapphire Crimson Claw's novels, is painfully apparent.
Her second book, Cyberbullying Adrasdea, is much shorter and talks about Adonis Paul and Royce Lopez's videos aggregating and compiling her uploads.
This is a dramatic reading of Mary's second book in its entirety, typos and all.
Here is the text of her second book:
2021 proved me very wrong, and without the love and support of my Facebook friends, I would not be writing this story.
Thank yoqu guys
Bradley
Joshua
Britney
Laura
Kate
April
Lindsey
Hannah
Melissa
And anyone else I've overlooked.
God bless you all.
Victims are typically seen as someone who is weak or vulnerable. Victims may have something the bully wants.
The definition of bullying is, the act of treating someone in a cruel, insulting, threatening or aggressive fashion repeatedly, or to attempt to cause someone to do something by means of force of coercion.
Cyberbullies are more dangerous because the internet gives them safety of anonymity, causing them to say things they probably wouldn't in a real life situation.
The people in this story are all adults.
That only helps to make the situation much, much worse, because the people doing this can't explain away their behavior with youth or school peer pressure, they're grown men, fully aware of what they are doing.
Its not bullying when its adults.
Its targeted harassment meant to destroy and kill.
Online there are large communities that harass the mentally ill.
They attack those of us who aren't mentally strong enough to fight back.
They know they're stronger, they know their victim is sick, they don't care.
This creates an extremely dangerous situation which will be relived through this book, as best I can.
Please dont bully people, whether you're a child or an adult, everyone is going through their own struggles.
cruelty and hate never helped anyone.
No, I didn't just slam my palm on the left side of the keyboard, thats my online username.
Also my author name.
This is my second book.
Sorry if the spacing is off or the grammar is bad, im not a professional writer, I'm a mentally ill woman trying to tell her story.
My real name is Mary, im currently 36 years old, diagnosed with cptsd, bipolar, borderline personality disorder and a fairly bad eating disorder.
I have zero real life friends, and no social skills to make any.
In all honesty, im scared of people.
I grew up in an abusive home, my father beat my mother nightly, he beat her the day my brother was born causing him to be born with cerebral palsy.
We always had roaches, headlice and anxiety.
The screaming was so constant that my brother would get scared if it WASNT loud, a TV or radio would have to be on for him.
Thats the beginning of my mental health issues, the cptsd.
Childhood abuse stunts emotional growth, so even tho people see me as intelligent, im not emotionally an adult and possibly never will be.
I cry easily and always have.
Everything feels like forever, so when bad things happen, in my mind, its never going to stop and I feel hopeless and helpless to control my own life.
My family has spent my entire life insisting there is nothing wrong with me, because im smart and you can't be smart and mentally ill, according to them.
What it actually means is that I'm crazy but I'm able to understand why I'm crazy.
Understanding an illness and controlling it are entirely separate beasts.
I was the kid in class that smelled bad, the one with no friends, the one people made fun of.
I remember being on the school bus and hearing boys joke about me being a Columbine shooter.
I was quiet and alone, always feeling like no one would ever understand or love me.
Now at 36 I still feel that way.
I was in an abusive marriage at 19 with a person who did not love me and just used me to shield a gender identity problem they had.
I was a witness to a murder that still causes me a lot of anxiety and stress.
Ive had drug and alcohol addiction problems that I have overcome, except for Marijuana.
I'm gluten intolerant, and I tend to use it against my eating disorder to lessen hunger symptoms, causing my hair to fall out from alopecia.
I've been on my own for 5 years, homeless, trying to survive.
Seeing therapist's and doctor's, taking medications and just trying to heal from a family that is still actively abusing me.
I have very severe depressive episodes that leave me suicidal, my arms are covered in deep scars from self harm.
I hear voices when I get very upset and it becomes harder to distinguish whats real.
Strictly speaking, im crazy, unhealthy and desperately in need of support.
Support which I found online, where cyber strangers treated me better than anyone real ever had.
I had a YouTube for 4 years where I talked about my struggles, sang songs, played video games, and felt apart of a group, felt cared for.
During my homeless years, that support would keep me moving forward.
Unfortunately that same platform that gave me a new life, has the same power to destroy that life.
And I guess that's enough background to get into this tale so let's go.
In January of 2021 I moved into my section 8 apartment, after years of homeless life I finally had a home.
I was so happy, I cried, I had hopes and dreams of a new life where I could bathe when I wanted, cook healthy meals and have a fridge to store them.
I was looking forward to decorating and making it my home while also focusing on my YouTube to give myself a small income.
My supporters donated a couple hundred dollars a month to help me stay medicated with weed, and well fed.
In February I started receiving comments on my videos from New people, and they where calling me a duck murderer.
They told me they came from daywave radio.
A search found a YouTube channel that had used my videos just that morning.
Videos of me feeding park ducks COOKED rice, rice that I cooked myself for the animals and was perfectly healthy.
A man named jj stoner and a man named royce Lopez watched that video and proclaimed I was murdering those ducks.
They insisted that even children knew not to feed birds rice.
They told their viewers I was a heartless murderer.
And that's the message that was relayed to me, a person with ptsd from witnessing a murder, now had comment after comment on my videos calling ME a murderer.
A murderer of ducks, yes, but I immediately knew where it was going to go because I could see the subtle implanting of ideas into their viewers minds, start in the first episode making this person look like a murderer of animals and it will sound more believable later when they switched to calling me a murderer of people.
I knew it was going to get worse and I got scared.
I watched the full video, stopping often to cry about what was being said about me.
I read the comments that called me ugly, fat, worthless, compared me to an alien.
It emotionally destroyed me, I felt my world spinning, I felt sick.
These comments kept swirling in my head and I just knew everyone hated me.
Everyone in the whole world.
Is that a little excessive? Yes, but unfortunately that's how my mind works, and no one was going to be able to convince me that wasn't the case.
Where I once had 5 people who supported me, I now had hundreds calling me names.
When I breakdown, its not pretty, and this was the beginning of a massive breakdown
I cried, screamed, made a video telling them how I felt.
Admittedly I called them nazis, and I still stand by that feeling.
The way they treat me like a sub human because of my mental health, they targeted me specifically because I was weak and alone.
Jj stoner even admitted that he had been waiting to show me to the world.
Waiting for what?
For my birthday.
The murder happened on my birthday, it makes the day day difficult every month and these attacks in 2021 would begin just days before my birthday.
He knew from reading my first book and watching me for years, that I would be extra vulnerable right then, and also that calling me a murderer would trigger something bad.
And he used that knowledge to choose the perfect time and circumstances to entirely destroy me.
For what reason, I guess I'll never know.
But one thing was clear to me from the start, these people wanted me dead.
They would repeatedly say they didn't, but their actions showed differently since they refused to STOP once they understood what it was doing to me.
On the second episode about me they contacted my abusive family, to prove to my supporters that I wasn't really abused.
My aunt Cathy Mackey and her daughter Sara called in and lied about me, laughing at how happy they where that people where bullying me.
Giggling about how there was always something wrong with me.
Saying I wasn't mentally unwell, just lazy.
Claiming all the abuse was made up.
Just like when I was a child, I felt this deep dread that no one would ever belive me, because mentally stronger people who hate me would always be the ones telling my story.
My aunt denies any abuse, when she knows her younger sister, my mother, was beat viciously for 30 years, untill my father ended it by killing himself.
The abuse was so bad that it was never going to end untill one of them died, and it did one day when the monster blew his own brains out, in front of his children and grandchildren.
She claims that she paid me 10k to leave her family alone, yet she stalked me online for 5 years without me attempting contact at all.
Does not sound like someone who wants someone OUT of their lives.
The truth was that 10k was insurance and supposed to be followed by a large inheritance, that my aunt blocked me from ever receiving.
Just the year before my younger sister informed me that they where going to read the will, which left me everything, but would not tell me where, or when, and made it clear that if I showed up the family would KILL me.
They where going to get that money and I wouldn't be safe to even attempt to collect it.
I let them have it, thinking maybe that would be the end, they got they money, they wanted nothing else from me, I expected to be FREE of my abusive family, and that's all I truly wanted.
So when I heard them on the show, it emotionally destroyed me because it was people who had abused and controlled me my entire life, and they where back to continue abusing me.
I would never be free.
As I'm writing this, its very difficult, I find myself wanting to cry, but I've cried all my tears over this Situation.
I started writing fully prepared for the struggle, as my first book was emotionally difficult.
But this one is effecting me more, because it's happened so recently and technically is still happening.
If I was to post on YouTube they would have the video to mock within seconds.
I keep having to take breaks to center myself.
Ill feel myself getting worked up, my face getting hot as my blood pressure rises, my heart pounding out of my chest, my fingers begin to twitch and everything becomes unbearable.
The music I'm listening to is suddenly the most aggravating noise in the universe.
The room temp is just wrong, I'm hot, I'm cold, im queasy, my skin feels like it's uncomfortable on my body.
These are things I feel while writing this story.
these feelings are a lot of what causes me to breakdown when I get upset, taking breaks and calming myself down is a big part of learning to cope with my emotions in a healthy way.
A break i can afford myself while remembering the situation, but was not given to me when the abuse was happening.
Once they began using my videos, the harassment became nonstop.
Dozens of comments, text messages, phone calls.
I couldn't just turn the internet off because they would still call me.
I'd wake up every morning to a restricted call, I usually let ring but sometimes I answered and would be greeted with the most awful things a person could say to another.
I really am trying to get better, to control my emotions, to find happiness In a world that I've only found misery in.
Its extreme hard because my nervous system completely freaks out at the slightest bit of stress.
I am not in control of myself once I've been triggered and it will quickly become a dangerous situation for me because I will injure myself.
During these moments, death truly feels like the only escape, the only freedom.
I think about it daily, and when upset, I talk about it.
Talking about being suicidal didn't cause these people to slow down or reasses the situation, it made them angry, they believed I was lying and trying to manipulate them into stopping.
Which wasn't going to happen untill they where done with me.
And they where just beginning.
I would make numerous videos defending myself against these comments, crying and pleading for it to stop.
I had done nothing to these people and didn't understand why they where attacking me.
I felt entirely helpless, my only help for the past 5 years being online and thats where the abuse was now.
I could no longer post online for help as they would use these posts to claim I was just trying to get money.
Laughing and mocking me for needing 5 dollars, while they made hundreds using my videos and sending people to torment me for being so disgustingly poor, and fat, and ugly, and worthless.
Knowing I can't work due to my mental illness they repeated to just get a job, telling me my YouTube life was over, I was no longer allowed to survive thru donations.
I was no longer allowed to talk about my life, my emotions.
My entire support system was stripped from me on the whim of these abusive men, who didn't even know me, but saw me as weak and went for the kill.
And their fans where paying them good money to kill me.
Now, you might be thinking, they didn't know me so maybe they really didn't realize what they where doing.
But they did know me, they researched me extensively, they read my first book by their own admission.
So they knew fully well that the woman they where harassing was not mental well.
But giving them the benefit of not knowing, I made videos explaining my illnesses, in a desperate plea for understanding.
This would result in more laughing and a multitude of classic bully phrases.
get over it, its not a big deal, leave if you can't handle it, call the suicide holiness, everyone has problems, we have cancer, people actually suffering don't bitch about it.
On and on, no empathy, no understanding.
I was drowning In their hate and they kept pulling the life vest away from me.
my Friends and supporters had no idea what was happening and where becoming anxious about my mental health, they tried reasoning with these people, but they where not willing to listen to anyone that didn't hate me.
They had set their minds to destroy me and they would not be slowed down by any bleeding hearts.
Their supporters cheered them on with their hatred, creating new accounts with names mocking me to publicly donate money for the extension of the harassment.
If the money had stopped rolling in, they would have left me alone.
But the money was good and I was seen as worthless.
I had a complete breakdown very early into the abuse and cut my hair off on camera, for them to see the effect their cruelty had on me
When they began attacking me I had very short hair but I had grown it long over the front of my left eye, I called it my sway.
And I actually used it in an attempt to shield my lazy left eye.
Probably making it weaker in the process, but that's vanity for ya.
Anyway.
I had dyed my sway pink and it brought me happiness to see the pink strands down in my eye.
Pink is a soothing color, the use it in mental hospital's because it has calming effects.
Fun color facts, pink is awesome.
And i loved my pink hair.
On the show they laughed at my hair.
In the comments I saw people comparing me to an alien.
To animals.
Hundreds of comments about how ugly I was and how i didnt even appear human.
It really got to me.
I cried and my body ached with the need to do something, anything, to stop this feeling.
What would this feeling be?
Shame?
Unworthiness?
Seeing all of these hateful comments, they reached straight to my heart and I believed them.
I believed that people saw me as an alien.
Ugly.
Stupid.
Worthless.
Old.
Thats one they said so often, how old I look for 36.
These kinds of comments are expected from the mean girls in high schools, and they destroy those girls more often than not.
I'm no longer in high school and these mean girls had a far larger reach than a single school or town.
So, I broke mentally.
I left my apartment to keep from hurting myself and I put out a video letting my supporters know I was struggling and asking for a little money for Marikina to help calm me down..
Later, because I asked for weed, they would claim I only cut my hair because I didn't get any.
They believe all of my breakdowns are over drugs and not a legitimate mental health crisis.
That makes the game they're playing extra dangerous for me.
They would mock me in the morning.
I would spend all day freaking out, begging them to stop, trying to correct the lies they where spreading.
I received my first power bill in the mail and it cheered me up a little bit, because it made me feel like a real adult.
My first bill in my name for my apartment.
I believed it was something to celebrate and I was ecstatic to have good news to share with my friends.
I quickly made a video showing my bill.
Within 30 seconds I was told to remove it, told I doxxed myself.
I didn't understand, I would soon.
I removed the video immediately but it was too late.
My address had been printed at the very top of the bill, I didn't even know it was there.
A few minutes later I was alerted to a comment on my YouTube, multiple videos got the same comment.
It read, my name is adrasdea, here is my address, (they used my real address) I love to be raped and want you to come over and force me even if I say no.
I deleted the comments as fast as I could, they where posted many times and using a bot that could fake accounts, the one being faked looked like I was sending the message.
I started to cry and scream, I was afraid, they where trying to send men to rape me now.
I then received a comment that deleting it wouldn't help, it had been posted to 4chan.
I truly felt like my world was over, I was so afraid of every sound being a man at my door.
A man from 4chan.
A man that thought I wanted to be raped.
A man I would never be able to identify because he would be a complete stranger to me and he would not believe my plea to stop because these people had told him I would say that.
I didn't know how to navigate 4chan, im afraid of people there, they seem so cruel.
And now they where being told to come rape me.
I left my apartment that night and wandered around all night scared.
I had a nice place to live finally and I couldn't feel safe there.
The rape threats increased over the next days and because they now had my address, threats of harm began.
I'd wake up to dozens of comments from different accounts, telling me to be ready, they where coming, they where going to hurt me.
Soon they found out my therapist's name and started threatening to kill her as well.
These weren't just trolls.
This was serious and I was terrified.
For 3 months I lived in fear of these people.
And they're still just making fun of me today.
They joke about showing up at my house wearing cop uniforms to scare me, ensuring that I couldn't trust police if they showed up.
Yes, its short, i apologize for that.
Theres much more to the story, but I'm simply not mentally able to write it all out at the moment because the abuse is still happening.
Actually it's getting worse as they're contacted family members and ex boyfriends for information about who I used to be.
None of those people are telling the truth, and none of those people know who I am now.
I've changed, whether anyone will ever belive it or not.
In the last 3 years since I began taking medication and speaking to a Therapist, I've changed.
And ill continue changing.
Thats the entire point of getting properly medicated and seeking therapy.
Such a big part of my healing has been hindered by the consistent denial by my family.
I feel the constant, pressing NEED to make people believe me.
Make people hear me.
After so long being without a voice, my whole life I've felt so powerless against the people who share my genes.
But my power dwells where it always has, in my writing.
In my lucid moments when I'm able to be the person they're afraid of me becoming.
They laugh at me for calling myself an author.
But, theyre buying this book.
And will buy the second half of it as well.
I feel like this is a jumbled mess and I really want to get my mind back before I attempt to really tell this story.
As soon as I get to that point, the next book will be released.
I'm sorry for the confusing mess this one was.
Ints a very confusing situation and its being perpetrated against a confused mind.
Praying it ends soon.
Peace
Her first book, I'll Never Stop Screaming, is attached as a PDF at the bottom of this post.
Other Videos
Mary is known for selling her nude photos for small fees, and often gets tricked into doing so, resulting in her breaking down on YouTube (shocker!)
Here she is talking about feeling worthless:
And here she is trying to treat her hair by cracking an egg into it:
And last but certainly not least, the infamous mayo hair video, as featured on Daywave:
Accounts
YouTube
Gaming YouTube
Twitter (a)
Instagram (inactive)
Facebook (a)
Reddit (a)
The Haydurs
Adrasdea Revived
Royce Lopez / Daywave Radio
Adonis Paul
Virgyy
JJ Stoner
Bernice Morgan
How did we get here?
White Trashville, Florida. February 23, 2009.
Florida woman Mary Barone (born Mary Margaret Woods) was seeing Florida man Kenneth McBride, who had been engaged to fellow Florida woman Roberta Laws for years. Roberta had cerebral palsy and was wheelchair-bound.
Mary had begun dating McBride after her former husband decided to transition into a woman. To this day, Mary remains a staunch supporter of the trans community.
Mary and McBride carried on their affair for months before Mary discovered McBride was engaged. When she went to his house one day, Roberta answered the door. McBride introduced Mary as a friend and caregiver he had brought on to care for Roberta. During the day, Mary cared for Roberta, but was sleeping with McBride in secret. She wanted Roberta out of the picture and told McBride to "get rid of" Roberta.
When McBride didn't immediately oblige, Mary had dinner with her grandmother and McBride. After the meal, she told him she wanted to break up with him because he was still with Roberta. According to Mary, McBride responded by whispering a threat to kill Mary's grandmother, so she got back in McBride's truck.
That night, McBride took matters into his own hands - literally. He called Mary and the two argued about McBride's future with Roberta, with McBride explicitly mentioning possibly murdering Roberta. Mary claims McBride threatened her as well during this argument. McBride told Mary to wait in the car, then went into the house and strangled Laws to death.
After 30 minutes, McBride returned to Mary and told her it was done. He took her inside, where the nude, raped, strangled body of Roberta lay on the bed, her limbs tied to the bedframe. McBride told Mary to get garbage bags from the kitchen, which he then cut up and used to wrap Laws' body. The pair went to Wal-Mart, where Mary purchased a shovel with which to bury the body.
McBride instructed Mary to clean the crime scene while he dug a hole in the backyard for Roberta's body. He then buried the body, and allegedly told Mary she couldn't leave the house or leave his sight if he left the house. She claims McBride cuffed her to the bed during this time.
On March 31, 2009, Mary snuck out of the house and reported the crime. McBride was arrested and Mary was offered to be placed in witness protection in exchange for her testimony.
McBride was sentenced to life in prison without parole on February 17, 2011. No charges were ever filed against Mary, though many (including McBride's lawyer) have argued she should be held accountable for her role in the crime.
(source / archive)
The search warrant and motion to compel regarding the turnover of a computer are attached at the bottom of the thread.
Most of the information and screenshots in this thread can be found in this compilation video from YouTuber Adonis Paul.
Life After Murder
A few years later, Mary's grandmother died and Mary moved into her condo. According to Mary's aunt, when she visited the condo, it was decrepit, with bloodstains on the walls and piles of mess everywhere. After she was forced out of the condo by her aunt and sister in 2017, Mary moved into a trailer on the back of the property. That's when she started making unhinged videos. In total, Mary has uploaded over 1900 YouTube videos, most of which she has deleted during fits of anger against her haydurs. Her hate-followers have re-uploaded many of her best meltdowns, but much of her content has been lost.
2018.
Mary was evicted after failing to pay taxes. She moved to LA to be homeless. For the next two years, she made videos chronicling her honestly terrifying experiences as a homeless woman living near skid row. Regardless of whether or not she was at fault for her circumstances, Mary always manages to find a way to make herself the victim.
Here's a picture of Mary's cart she pushed around when she was begging on the streets of LA:
Here's Mary talking about (and demonstrating) her bathroom habits:
Mary's stories and dates often change and are riddled with inconsistencies; she has given multiple different accounts of the above murder (I referred to official documentation for this thread.) She lived in her truck for years, spending her money on weed and even attempting to grow some. Over the course of that time, she was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, and compounding PTSD. Mary has also claimed to be schizophrenic. She's heavily medicated, but that doesn't stop her from melting down on a daily basis.
In late 2020, Mary qualified for section 8 housing but had to surrender her truck after an incident with the man who held the title to it. The church where she was parked had told her to vacate, and got in contact with the truck's owner. He reclaimed the vehicle after seeing that Mary was spending her days begging for weed and playing old video games on her phone.
2021.
YouTuber Adonis Paul discovered Mary's videos and began chronicling her, delving into her background. He spoke to someone from the church where she had parked, and the person relayed that Mary had threatened self-harm and suicide every time they had asked her to leave. They eventually contacted her therapist, who managed to get her to accept that she would have to leave. According to the church member, Mary routinely begged for donations from the congregants and was a constant presence in the church parking lot.
Mary responded to the various videos about her, trying to justify her behavior. She accused Royce Lopez of Revenge of the Cis and Adonis Paul of sic'ing their followers on her to attempt to sexually violate her and attack her, though they have repeatedly said not to do that:
Much of Mary's disdain for Adonis and Royce comes from the fact that they like to point out she probably should have been charged as an accessory to Roberta's murder.
Despite her erratic mood and troubles with others in the building, she has stayed at the shelter ever since, continuing to make daily videos of her episodes. She claims most of her outbursts are brought on by the barrage of negativity in her comment section.
Her meltdowns have earned her a large hate-following, mainly stemming from Royce Lopez of Revenge of the Cis' frequent coverage of her and Adonis Paul's chronicling of, well, literally her entire life. Even without Royce and the resulting hostility, Mary would still be insane, posting rambling diatribes about getting cancelled out of gig work from Steve Harvey:
YouTube
Mary has no shame. She has talked about defecating in a salad bowl, rubbed mayonnaise in her hair, and watered her attempt at growing weed plants with period blood. Her unhinged videos got the attention of multiple lolcow-related streamers, who began mocking her videos. They delved into her past and discovered her involvement in Roberta's homicide. When their followers began commenting on Mary's videos, a months-long feud erupted, hence the video at the top of this post.
To Mary, everything is a life-or-death issue. She claims that only dying will save her from the ~endless harassment~ she receives. She e-begs, hoping to elicit sympathy from her viewers, the overwhelming majority of which have come from negative coverage of her. Much of the money she gets from e-begging is spent on weed, which she claims she needs to stabilize her mood,
Royce and his equally fat co-host JJ Stoner mock Mary on an almost-daily basis on Royce's YouTube show, Daywave Radio. Mary hate-watches Daywave every day and has begun directly responding to the haydurs. That video can't be uploaded here due to file size. Mary reacts to various other callouts of her bullshit, as can be seen below. She always tries to get people to take pity on her, though anyone who knows her history knows she is simply a chronic beggar:
She has accused Royce and his fans of sending people to violate her:
In April 2021, Mary cut up her benefits paperwork in a futile attempt to stick it to Royce and Adonis Paul. This only resulted in her getting laughed at even more and now being without funds to feed herself, which led to her issuing a feeble apology video to Royce as a desperate attempt to reclaim the money he offered her.
She ended up apologizing to Royce and Adonis Paul when they offered to pay her enough to keep her cellphone on. The cut on her forehead is from her banging her head on a streetlight when she had a meltdown:
Family Drama
After she was kicked out of her grandmother's house, Mary's relations with her family further deteriorated. Her aunt Cathy has gone on Adonis Paul to trash-talk her and refute her claims of widespread familial abuse; Mary's parents weren't great, but the rest of the family seems to be relatively sane. Mary's allegations that her father was abusive to her brother and that her mother was a non-functioning alcoholic appear to be true, but her belief that they're all trying to abuse her and create missing persons claims to harass her is false. Cathy refuses to side with Mary, and has gone on Virgyyy (now banned) and Adonis Paul's shows to discuss Mary. Here's what Mary has to say about her aunt:
Mary has been threatened with legal proceedings (a) by her sister:
Mary has repeatedly claimed her family was abusive, though her aunt has denied most of her claims. Here's what she looked like as a girl (she used to be obese but lost over 100 lbs):
Reactions / Haydur Creations
Mary's online presence has inspired all sorts of fan works from her detractors. Pretty much all of this centers around Adonis Paul and Royce Lopez, and everyone involved uses and shares each other's memes and mockeries in a circle-jerk, but it's still hilarious.
Mary also HATES being called a MERDARURR and will make a video telling you exactly how she feels about it, despite literally being an accomplice in a homicide.
Most episodes of Daywave Radio feature Mary in a voice-over when Royce raids other streamers' channels.
Mary has also claimed to be in "physical danger" (a) because of the online harassment she receives, which could simply be avoided if she ignored it:
Books
Mary has written two short books, both full of typos. The first, titled I'll Never Stop Screaming, is about her struggles dealing with homelessness and trauma. The lack of proofreading, reminiscent of Sapphire Crimson Claw's novels, is painfully apparent.
Her second book, Cyberbullying Adrasdea, is much shorter and talks about Adonis Paul and Royce Lopez's videos aggregating and compiling her uploads.
This is a dramatic reading of Mary's second book in its entirety, typos and all.
Here is the text of her second book:
Cyberbullying Adrasdea
Acknowledgments
I thought 2020 would be the worst it could get.2021 proved me very wrong, and without the love and support of my Facebook friends, I would not be writing this story.
Thank yoqu guys
Bradley
Joshua
Britney
Laura
Kate
April
Lindsey
Hannah
Melissa
And anyone else I've overlooked.
God bless you all.
What is a bully.
the definition of a bully is, a person who is habitually cruel, insulting or threatening to others in an attempt to dominate or intimidate.Victims are typically seen as someone who is weak or vulnerable. Victims may have something the bully wants.
The definition of bullying is, the act of treating someone in a cruel, insulting, threatening or aggressive fashion repeatedly, or to attempt to cause someone to do something by means of force of coercion.
Cyberbullies are more dangerous because the internet gives them safety of anonymity, causing them to say things they probably wouldn't in a real life situation.
Preface
Cyberbullying is a real problem online, and its not just a game for kids in high school anymoreThe people in this story are all adults.
That only helps to make the situation much, much worse, because the people doing this can't explain away their behavior with youth or school peer pressure, they're grown men, fully aware of what they are doing.
Its not bullying when its adults.
Its targeted harassment meant to destroy and kill.
Online there are large communities that harass the mentally ill.
They attack those of us who aren't mentally strong enough to fight back.
They know they're stronger, they know their victim is sick, they don't care.
This creates an extremely dangerous situation which will be relived through this book, as best I can.
Please dont bully people, whether you're a child or an adult, everyone is going through their own struggles.
cruelty and hate never helped anyone.
Chapter 1: Who is adrasdea?
AdrasdeaNo, I didn't just slam my palm on the left side of the keyboard, thats my online username.
Also my author name.
This is my second book.
Sorry if the spacing is off or the grammar is bad, im not a professional writer, I'm a mentally ill woman trying to tell her story.
My real name is Mary, im currently 36 years old, diagnosed with cptsd, bipolar, borderline personality disorder and a fairly bad eating disorder.
I have zero real life friends, and no social skills to make any.
In all honesty, im scared of people.
I grew up in an abusive home, my father beat my mother nightly, he beat her the day my brother was born causing him to be born with cerebral palsy.
We always had roaches, headlice and anxiety.
The screaming was so constant that my brother would get scared if it WASNT loud, a TV or radio would have to be on for him.
Thats the beginning of my mental health issues, the cptsd.
Childhood abuse stunts emotional growth, so even tho people see me as intelligent, im not emotionally an adult and possibly never will be.
I cry easily and always have.
Everything feels like forever, so when bad things happen, in my mind, its never going to stop and I feel hopeless and helpless to control my own life.
My family has spent my entire life insisting there is nothing wrong with me, because im smart and you can't be smart and mentally ill, according to them.
What it actually means is that I'm crazy but I'm able to understand why I'm crazy.
Understanding an illness and controlling it are entirely separate beasts.
I was the kid in class that smelled bad, the one with no friends, the one people made fun of.
I remember being on the school bus and hearing boys joke about me being a Columbine shooter.
I was quiet and alone, always feeling like no one would ever understand or love me.
Now at 36 I still feel that way.
I was in an abusive marriage at 19 with a person who did not love me and just used me to shield a gender identity problem they had.
I was a witness to a murder that still causes me a lot of anxiety and stress.
Ive had drug and alcohol addiction problems that I have overcome, except for Marijuana.
I'm gluten intolerant, and I tend to use it against my eating disorder to lessen hunger symptoms, causing my hair to fall out from alopecia.
I've been on my own for 5 years, homeless, trying to survive.
Seeing therapist's and doctor's, taking medications and just trying to heal from a family that is still actively abusing me.
I have very severe depressive episodes that leave me suicidal, my arms are covered in deep scars from self harm.
I hear voices when I get very upset and it becomes harder to distinguish whats real.
Strictly speaking, im crazy, unhealthy and desperately in need of support.
Support which I found online, where cyber strangers treated me better than anyone real ever had.
I had a YouTube for 4 years where I talked about my struggles, sang songs, played video games, and felt apart of a group, felt cared for.
During my homeless years, that support would keep me moving forward.
Unfortunately that same platform that gave me a new life, has the same power to destroy that life.
And I guess that's enough background to get into this tale so let's go.
Chapter 2: A home
In 2020 I lived in a truck.In January of 2021 I moved into my section 8 apartment, after years of homeless life I finally had a home.
I was so happy, I cried, I had hopes and dreams of a new life where I could bathe when I wanted, cook healthy meals and have a fridge to store them.
I was looking forward to decorating and making it my home while also focusing on my YouTube to give myself a small income.
My supporters donated a couple hundred dollars a month to help me stay medicated with weed, and well fed.
In February I started receiving comments on my videos from New people, and they where calling me a duck murderer.
They told me they came from daywave radio.
A search found a YouTube channel that had used my videos just that morning.
Videos of me feeding park ducks COOKED rice, rice that I cooked myself for the animals and was perfectly healthy.
A man named jj stoner and a man named royce Lopez watched that video and proclaimed I was murdering those ducks.
They insisted that even children knew not to feed birds rice.
They told their viewers I was a heartless murderer.
And that's the message that was relayed to me, a person with ptsd from witnessing a murder, now had comment after comment on my videos calling ME a murderer.
A murderer of ducks, yes, but I immediately knew where it was going to go because I could see the subtle implanting of ideas into their viewers minds, start in the first episode making this person look like a murderer of animals and it will sound more believable later when they switched to calling me a murderer of people.
I knew it was going to get worse and I got scared.
I watched the full video, stopping often to cry about what was being said about me.
I read the comments that called me ugly, fat, worthless, compared me to an alien.
It emotionally destroyed me, I felt my world spinning, I felt sick.
These comments kept swirling in my head and I just knew everyone hated me.
Everyone in the whole world.
Is that a little excessive? Yes, but unfortunately that's how my mind works, and no one was going to be able to convince me that wasn't the case.
Where I once had 5 people who supported me, I now had hundreds calling me names.
When I breakdown, its not pretty, and this was the beginning of a massive breakdown
I cried, screamed, made a video telling them how I felt.
Admittedly I called them nazis, and I still stand by that feeling.
The way they treat me like a sub human because of my mental health, they targeted me specifically because I was weak and alone.
Jj stoner even admitted that he had been waiting to show me to the world.
Waiting for what?
For my birthday.
The murder happened on my birthday, it makes the day day difficult every month and these attacks in 2021 would begin just days before my birthday.
He knew from reading my first book and watching me for years, that I would be extra vulnerable right then, and also that calling me a murderer would trigger something bad.
And he used that knowledge to choose the perfect time and circumstances to entirely destroy me.
For what reason, I guess I'll never know.
But one thing was clear to me from the start, these people wanted me dead.
They would repeatedly say they didn't, but their actions showed differently since they refused to STOP once they understood what it was doing to me.
On the second episode about me they contacted my abusive family, to prove to my supporters that I wasn't really abused.
My aunt Cathy Mackey and her daughter Sara called in and lied about me, laughing at how happy they where that people where bullying me.
Giggling about how there was always something wrong with me.
Saying I wasn't mentally unwell, just lazy.
Claiming all the abuse was made up.
Just like when I was a child, I felt this deep dread that no one would ever belive me, because mentally stronger people who hate me would always be the ones telling my story.
My aunt denies any abuse, when she knows her younger sister, my mother, was beat viciously for 30 years, untill my father ended it by killing himself.
The abuse was so bad that it was never going to end untill one of them died, and it did one day when the monster blew his own brains out, in front of his children and grandchildren.
She claims that she paid me 10k to leave her family alone, yet she stalked me online for 5 years without me attempting contact at all.
Does not sound like someone who wants someone OUT of their lives.
The truth was that 10k was insurance and supposed to be followed by a large inheritance, that my aunt blocked me from ever receiving.
Just the year before my younger sister informed me that they where going to read the will, which left me everything, but would not tell me where, or when, and made it clear that if I showed up the family would KILL me.
They where going to get that money and I wouldn't be safe to even attempt to collect it.
I let them have it, thinking maybe that would be the end, they got they money, they wanted nothing else from me, I expected to be FREE of my abusive family, and that's all I truly wanted.
So when I heard them on the show, it emotionally destroyed me because it was people who had abused and controlled me my entire life, and they where back to continue abusing me.
I would never be free.
Chapter 3: emotional control
I'm going to pause the story for a moment to give you a glimpse into my mind.As I'm writing this, its very difficult, I find myself wanting to cry, but I've cried all my tears over this Situation.
I started writing fully prepared for the struggle, as my first book was emotionally difficult.
But this one is effecting me more, because it's happened so recently and technically is still happening.
If I was to post on YouTube they would have the video to mock within seconds.
I keep having to take breaks to center myself.
Ill feel myself getting worked up, my face getting hot as my blood pressure rises, my heart pounding out of my chest, my fingers begin to twitch and everything becomes unbearable.
The music I'm listening to is suddenly the most aggravating noise in the universe.
The room temp is just wrong, I'm hot, I'm cold, im queasy, my skin feels like it's uncomfortable on my body.
These are things I feel while writing this story.
these feelings are a lot of what causes me to breakdown when I get upset, taking breaks and calming myself down is a big part of learning to cope with my emotions in a healthy way.
A break i can afford myself while remembering the situation, but was not given to me when the abuse was happening.
Once they began using my videos, the harassment became nonstop.
Dozens of comments, text messages, phone calls.
I couldn't just turn the internet off because they would still call me.
I'd wake up every morning to a restricted call, I usually let ring but sometimes I answered and would be greeted with the most awful things a person could say to another.
I really am trying to get better, to control my emotions, to find happiness In a world that I've only found misery in.
Its extreme hard because my nervous system completely freaks out at the slightest bit of stress.
I am not in control of myself once I've been triggered and it will quickly become a dangerous situation for me because I will injure myself.
During these moments, death truly feels like the only escape, the only freedom.
I think about it daily, and when upset, I talk about it.
Talking about being suicidal didn't cause these people to slow down or reasses the situation, it made them angry, they believed I was lying and trying to manipulate them into stopping.
Which wasn't going to happen untill they where done with me.
And they where just beginning.
Chapter 4: triggered insanity
Days blend together at this point, when I start breaking down time loses all meaning, I would get fixed on a single comment that would just repeat in my head for hours, driving me insane.I would make numerous videos defending myself against these comments, crying and pleading for it to stop.
I had done nothing to these people and didn't understand why they where attacking me.
I felt entirely helpless, my only help for the past 5 years being online and thats where the abuse was now.
I could no longer post online for help as they would use these posts to claim I was just trying to get money.
Laughing and mocking me for needing 5 dollars, while they made hundreds using my videos and sending people to torment me for being so disgustingly poor, and fat, and ugly, and worthless.
Knowing I can't work due to my mental illness they repeated to just get a job, telling me my YouTube life was over, I was no longer allowed to survive thru donations.
I was no longer allowed to talk about my life, my emotions.
My entire support system was stripped from me on the whim of these abusive men, who didn't even know me, but saw me as weak and went for the kill.
And their fans where paying them good money to kill me.
Now, you might be thinking, they didn't know me so maybe they really didn't realize what they where doing.
But they did know me, they researched me extensively, they read my first book by their own admission.
So they knew fully well that the woman they where harassing was not mental well.
But giving them the benefit of not knowing, I made videos explaining my illnesses, in a desperate plea for understanding.
This would result in more laughing and a multitude of classic bully phrases.
get over it, its not a big deal, leave if you can't handle it, call the suicide holiness, everyone has problems, we have cancer, people actually suffering don't bitch about it.
On and on, no empathy, no understanding.
I was drowning In their hate and they kept pulling the life vest away from me.
my Friends and supporters had no idea what was happening and where becoming anxious about my mental health, they tried reasoning with these people, but they where not willing to listen to anyone that didn't hate me.
They had set their minds to destroy me and they would not be slowed down by any bleeding hearts.
Their supporters cheered them on with their hatred, creating new accounts with names mocking me to publicly donate money for the extension of the harassment.
If the money had stopped rolling in, they would have left me alone.
But the money was good and I was seen as worthless.
I had a complete breakdown very early into the abuse and cut my hair off on camera, for them to see the effect their cruelty had on me
When they began attacking me I had very short hair but I had grown it long over the front of my left eye, I called it my sway.
And I actually used it in an attempt to shield my lazy left eye.
Probably making it weaker in the process, but that's vanity for ya.
Anyway.
I had dyed my sway pink and it brought me happiness to see the pink strands down in my eye.
Pink is a soothing color, the use it in mental hospital's because it has calming effects.
Fun color facts, pink is awesome.
And i loved my pink hair.
On the show they laughed at my hair.
In the comments I saw people comparing me to an alien.
To animals.
Hundreds of comments about how ugly I was and how i didnt even appear human.
It really got to me.
I cried and my body ached with the need to do something, anything, to stop this feeling.
What would this feeling be?
Shame?
Unworthiness?
Seeing all of these hateful comments, they reached straight to my heart and I believed them.
I believed that people saw me as an alien.
Ugly.
Stupid.
Worthless.
Old.
Thats one they said so often, how old I look for 36.
These kinds of comments are expected from the mean girls in high schools, and they destroy those girls more often than not.
I'm no longer in high school and these mean girls had a far larger reach than a single school or town.
So, I broke mentally.
I left my apartment to keep from hurting myself and I put out a video letting my supporters know I was struggling and asking for a little money for Marikina to help calm me down..
Later, because I asked for weed, they would claim I only cut my hair because I didn't get any.
They believe all of my breakdowns are over drugs and not a legitimate mental health crisis.
That makes the game they're playing extra dangerous for me.
Chapter 5: Rape and death threats
Day after day I went thru the same torment.They would mock me in the morning.
I would spend all day freaking out, begging them to stop, trying to correct the lies they where spreading.
I received my first power bill in the mail and it cheered me up a little bit, because it made me feel like a real adult.
My first bill in my name for my apartment.
I believed it was something to celebrate and I was ecstatic to have good news to share with my friends.
I quickly made a video showing my bill.
Within 30 seconds I was told to remove it, told I doxxed myself.
I didn't understand, I would soon.
I removed the video immediately but it was too late.
My address had been printed at the very top of the bill, I didn't even know it was there.
A few minutes later I was alerted to a comment on my YouTube, multiple videos got the same comment.
It read, my name is adrasdea, here is my address, (they used my real address) I love to be raped and want you to come over and force me even if I say no.
I deleted the comments as fast as I could, they where posted many times and using a bot that could fake accounts, the one being faked looked like I was sending the message.
I started to cry and scream, I was afraid, they where trying to send men to rape me now.
I then received a comment that deleting it wouldn't help, it had been posted to 4chan.
I truly felt like my world was over, I was so afraid of every sound being a man at my door.
A man from 4chan.
A man that thought I wanted to be raped.
A man I would never be able to identify because he would be a complete stranger to me and he would not believe my plea to stop because these people had told him I would say that.
I didn't know how to navigate 4chan, im afraid of people there, they seem so cruel.
And now they where being told to come rape me.
I left my apartment that night and wandered around all night scared.
I had a nice place to live finally and I couldn't feel safe there.
The rape threats increased over the next days and because they now had my address, threats of harm began.
I'd wake up to dozens of comments from different accounts, telling me to be ready, they where coming, they where going to hurt me.
Soon they found out my therapist's name and started threatening to kill her as well.
These weren't just trolls.
This was serious and I was terrified.
For 3 months I lived in fear of these people.
And they're still just making fun of me today.
They joke about showing up at my house wearing cop uniforms to scare me, ensuring that I couldn't trust police if they showed up.
Part two coming soon
I. Ending this book here.Yes, its short, i apologize for that.
Theres much more to the story, but I'm simply not mentally able to write it all out at the moment because the abuse is still happening.
Actually it's getting worse as they're contacted family members and ex boyfriends for information about who I used to be.
None of those people are telling the truth, and none of those people know who I am now.
I've changed, whether anyone will ever belive it or not.
In the last 3 years since I began taking medication and speaking to a Therapist, I've changed.
And ill continue changing.
Thats the entire point of getting properly medicated and seeking therapy.
Such a big part of my healing has been hindered by the consistent denial by my family.
I feel the constant, pressing NEED to make people believe me.
Make people hear me.
After so long being without a voice, my whole life I've felt so powerless against the people who share my genes.
But my power dwells where it always has, in my writing.
In my lucid moments when I'm able to be the person they're afraid of me becoming.
They laugh at me for calling myself an author.
But, theyre buying this book.
And will buy the second half of it as well.
I feel like this is a jumbled mess and I really want to get my mind back before I attempt to really tell this story.
As soon as I get to that point, the next book will be released.
I'm sorry for the confusing mess this one was.
Ints a very confusing situation and its being perpetrated against a confused mind.
Praying it ends soon.
Peace
Her first book, I'll Never Stop Screaming, is attached as a PDF at the bottom of this post.
Other Videos
Mary is known for selling her nude photos for small fees, and often gets tricked into doing so, resulting in her breaking down on YouTube (shocker!)
Here she is talking about feeling worthless:
And here she is trying to treat her hair by cracking an egg into it:
And last but certainly not least, the infamous mayo hair video, as featured on Daywave:
Accounts
YouTube
Gaming YouTube
Twitter (a)
Instagram (inactive)
Facebook (a)
Reddit (a)
The Haydurs
Adrasdea Revived
Royce Lopez / Daywave Radio
Adonis Paul
Virgyy
JJ Stoner
Bernice Morgan
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