The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch / @TenaciousRanch / Steampunk Penny / Penellope Logue / Phillip Matthew Logue - Don't cry because it ended, laugh because it's still getting worse.

[Kuritan Deplorable]

So, I'm on a bender again and have become filled with autistic curiosity about those stairs. They have the potential to be a hazard if my research is correct. The two closest stairs I could find for the trooncase are this and this, which are weight-rated for either 300 or 450 pounds. That means if three Tranchlings go up in file, they'll go over the weight limit, potentially by a lot. The stairs could suffer damage and eventually catastrophically collapse if used regularly with multiple Tranchlings. Also, and I'm less certain of this, but those stairs are usually pretty narrow; less than two and a half feet usually and by my guestimate would take a left-right tilt of 18 degrees unloaded to tip, corresponding to one side sinking slightly less than nine inches into the mud. Put Kevin on there, it might take considerably less, potentially sub 10 degrees, or one leg sinking roughly four inches into the mud. The actual answer is somewhere inbetween more likely than not, but it does seem possible to me at the moment that Earl could go stair-tipping or sabotage the stairs at some point in the not-so-far-off future.

We're also assuming the upper anchor holds. If the old wooden stairs were rotten hell to the point that they had to rip them out, who says the landing at the top is in much better shape? It might look fine but rotting wood can be stealthy like that. A couple hundred pounds of force, twisting as the legs sink unevenly, could rip the thing right out.

 

[Dagobert]

We're also assuming the upper anchor holds. If the old wooden stairs were rotten hell to the point that they had to rip them out, who says the landing at the top is in much better shape? It might look fine but rotting wood can be stealthy like that. A couple hundred pounds of force, twisting as the legs sink unevenly, could rip the thing right out.

Certainly true. Metal stress is also a sneaky bitch, I've had a metal patio chair snap underneath my fat ass because it was stressed by being propped wrong for a couple of years, so if the weight limit is on the lower end, any number of things could be mysteriously sabotaged by Earl.

 

[Lord of the Large Pants]

Currently 8 or 9 with randoms ghosting in and out
Check these superb trading cards by @Swerf'n'Terf

I'd make a sarcastic remark about how they're breeding... but we all know nobody there has a womb.

 

[S.C.U.D.]

It might look fine but rotting wood can be stealthy like that.

Just a few months ago I had to replace several planks in my back deck because they had rotted (because when I built the deck I fucked up and didn't build it properly which led to rot over time) and I never noticed until after a raccoon had gotten under there and the pest control guy pointed them out to me, because all the rot was where I couldn't easily see.

 

[TaimuRadiu]

I'd make a sarcastic remark about how they're breeding... but we all know nobody there has a womb.

It just looks that way because they're getting fatter. I thought farm work was supposed to exercise you?

 

[Taylor Swift's Ghostwrite]

Realistically their ranch doesn't have as much work as a real farm.

1. Let animals out.
2. Throw hay on the ground.
3. Put animals away at some point.

I'm sure there are other things they do, like putting the poop in a pile. They don't have fields though, they don't take care of the animals properly at all and all of that is going to greatly decrease how much work they get in. Add in they eat a lot of shitty but high calorie food and they aren't really get a deficit in calories in vs calories out.

 

[Iron Hamster]

Realistically their ranch doesn't have as much work as a real farm.

1. Let animals out.
2. Throw hay on the ground.
3. Put animals away at some point.

Never mind kevin and the others. What about the real animals?

 

[Comandante Marcos]

I have such a hard time keeping track of all the Trancheros. The trading cards are beautiful, but I think I need a full-on wikisperg grid of name/deadname/quarters/genital damage to date/bonus non-troon mental dysfunctions. Maybe like those guides to identifying wild plants; telling water hemlock from cow parsley is a bit like telling the various lumpy big-glasses hat men apart.

...So if this means they're cutting a hole in an actual structure, doesn't that need a permit?

You too? I have zero luck matching troon-names to deadnames, much less trying to keep all the faces straight, and who lives in Troon Mansion vs who lives in the slave quartersRV's outside in the cold.

Also, I think there might be much lulz to be had if Troonerdome were to collapse late one night because they've been cutting holes in the key support beams. That or the alphatroons trying to ascend the stairway to hell at the same time and it giving way and falling on them. So we have the gamut from an overloaded solar power system battery bank asphyxiating them with sulfur gas to a dust storm burying the troons for eternity if not longer to a metal staircase giving way to the dome collapsing from having a hole cut in the wrong place. And then there's them running out of burrito ingredients during a Colorado snowstorm and the starving troons being trapped for a couple weeks. And Earl coming back to overinflate their tires. When do we update the poll at the top? Mods?

 

[AnOminous]

I think it should be said that these people are rarely ever actual idealogical communists as opposed to edgy larper control freaks.

As I generally put it, they have almost always read at most the Communist Manifesto, nearly never Das Kapital. Be actually afraid of the ones who have, they're the dangerous ones.

 

[S.C.U.D.]

I'm sure there are other things they do, like putting the poop in a pile.

Actually, the alpacas do that naturally.

 

[AnOminous]

The Staircase to Troondom is fully assembled, and looks steep and I really would not trust it.

Holy Christ this shithole looks like the surface of goddamn Mars.

That giant tub of sour cream and bowl of cheese... fuck, man. No wonder Paul and Kev are such flabby units.

Any leftovers, like the veggies, mushrooms, and olives, will be left outside for the Outdoor Troons only after the Indoor Troons have eaten first.

I think this is the end of a novel called Tranimal Farm.

 

[Gone Ham]

Really feminine Truck pictures

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Fence materials because they still aren't done with their walled in compound

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Fishing for free Anthem for their larp future City State

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Another lamb is born, marking 8 for this year. Unknown how many are alive though

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Another picture of the baby lambs

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Spoiler: Pictures and video

 

[Baloney Face]

As I generally put it, they have almost always read at most the Communist Manifesto, nearly never Das Kapital. Be actually afraid of the ones who have, they're the dangerous ones.

Uh oh. Yeah I read it in college.
Synopsis: Lots of dull statistics actually.

 

[S.C.U.D.]

I just have a gut feeling that the Communist Manifesto is for leftists what Atlas Shrugged is for the right, in that most people who say they love it haven't actually read the whole thing, just excerpts. Because it's fucking boring.

 

[White Devil]

I just have a gut feeling that the Communist Manifesto is for leftists what Atlas Shrugged is for the right, in that most people who say they love it haven't actually read the whole thing, just excerpts. Because it's fucking boring.

All of Marx and Engels works are fucking boring.

 

[Emperor Percival Tachyon]

Be actually afraid of the ones who have, they're the dangerous ones.

In my experience it's the opposite. The ones who have actually read it are either boring history nerds who think it's important or hardcore lefties who actually understand what they believe in, and can make a semi-coherent argument for what they believe in (Regardless of whether you think that political ideology is right or wrong, good or evil).

The ones who have never read it are generally the lunatics who's political convictions are nevertheless as strong as ever, and basically boil down to a self-contradictory mess of "Stalinism and/or Anarchy but with more trannies, free stuff, and rainbow flags" People who barely understand what they claim to believe in are far more insane in genral, in my experience.

 

[Dagobert]

In my experience it's the opposite. The ones who have actually read it are either boring history nerds who think it's important or hardcore lefties who actually understand what they believe in, and can make a semi-coherent argument for what they believe in (Regardless of whether you think that political ideology is right or wrong, good or evil).

The ones who have never read it are generally the lunatics who's political convictions are nevertheless as strong as ever, and basically boil down to a self-contradictory mess of "Stalinism and/or Anarchy but with more trannies, free stuff, and rainbow flags" People who barely understand what they claim to believe in are far more insane in genral, in my experience.

They're like modern day Neonazis, they don't do it because of genuine understanding and conviction of an ideology but as a method of lashing out

 

[Ninon42]

I just have a gut feeling that the Communist Manifesto is for leftists what Atlas Shrugged is for the right, in that most people who say they love it haven't actually read the whole thing, just excerpts. Because it's fucking boring.

Spoiler: Commie book spergery

The Communist Manifesto was written to be an easily digestible synopsis of marxism to rally the workers of the world. It's a pretty quick and easy read, though one that may leave the reader with more questions than answers. When I read it in history (along with so. much. Hobsbawm), it surprised me that this form of communism was built on and not exclusive of capitalism, like a parasite. It also assumed without supporting evidence that once the workers took over the means of production and overthrew the bourgeoisie through nonspecified but undoubtedly bloody means, crime would cease and peace would reign. Once again, no how was given so the plan presented was pretty much 1. Workers take over 2. ???? 3. Peace and prosperity. It's a rather immature and naive ideology as laid out in the Manifesto, though of course Marx, Engels et al go far more in depth in the theory.

Atlas Shugged is just tiresome. Galt's longass monologue is about 30 pages too much and the characters are really quite thin. It's equally simplistic in ways as the Communist Manifesto, and I found its focus on self-determination appealing as a 15 year old anarchist. The Objectivists like Greenspan who based our national fiscal policies on Rand's questionable ideals were not as directly detrimental to the world as the commies (and Greenspan did renounce his commitment to the theory and declared it unworkable), and the modern day adherents gave us the gift of the utterly exceptional lolcows behind the failed Galt's Gulch haven attempt in the Atacama desert.

The trancheros have a Hot Topic tshirt level understanding of communism or anarchy; their intellectual depth is as shallow as Kevin's amhole. Phil, at least, seems to possess some level of animal cunning and ability to profit from unabashed capitalism while espousing communist ideals for the griftbux.

 

[Old Fart]

You know when they break it will be Earl’s fault.

Perhaps Earl will sneak in at night and overinflate the stairs with a very tiny handpump.

Fence materials because they still aren't done with their walled in compound
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Like I thought, they raked in a small capital and dramatically showed off the Building of the Antifascist Wall, and then abandoned it as attention weaned.

My prediction: the Earth House is not going to be finished by next spring.

 

[Semiprofessional Sperg]

Anthem of the Tranch- Sung to the tune of Horst-Wessel-Lied

Raise the flag, pastel and gaudy
The tranchers cope, seethe, and dilate
Comrades shot dead by Earl and the Kiwifarms
Meet those in the fourty-one percent

Clear the streets for Kevin's gaping amhole
Clear the streets for the dying pets
Many are looking upon their gruesome forms with dread
The day of wounds and infections dawns

For the last time, the call of coom is sounded
For the fight, they stand unprepared
Already they are crying to be called women
But fuck that shit for they are not and will never be