Musicians that are also Lolcows?

Hongourable Madisha said:
Ian Brown of the Stone Roses is a conspiracy nut and always posting mad shit on Twitter about the latest thing he's got into his head. There's a few rappers like that too, Lowkey is a bit less out there than he is but he still goes around calling people Illuminati.

Jordan Raskopolous of The Axis Of Awesome trooned out, seemingly out of a mix of autogynephilia, spending too much time on Something Awful, and feeling inadequate compared to his footy player dad so in typical sexist creep fashion decided that failed man = woman. Now he posts lewds and rambling walls of text about how he can't possibly carry the band's equipment around because he's a dainty lady now, even though plenty of female musicians and roadies do just that.

Blood On The Dancefloor are more horrorcows but probably count.
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somehow he still looks more masculine than them. what the fuck. forget hauling the bands equipment around. he looks like he could be pulling trucks out of ditches.
 

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Guile of the Bolden Ditch said:
Brian Evans (writes and records drums for the band CHON) occasionally spergs out on Instagram, revealing his narcissim and inflated ego.
I know he doesn't meet the requirements for a cow but I've been wanting to post about this guy for a while.

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A few examples of Brian getting butthurt that barely anyone knows he's recorded drums on CHON's albums


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Brian raging about Meinl endorsing CHON (HOW DARE THEY PUT THEIR LOGO ON MY RECORD!), eventually leading to Meinl blocking him
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Everyone in Chon are pretty cowish tbh.
 
Solid Snek said:
Iommi is definitely a cow. He's not as bad as Lars Ulrich or whatshisface, that neckbeard sperg from Machine Head, and perhaps I'm just biased because I hate all of Iommi's "music". But yeah, he's right up there for me!

Apparently, back when they were kids, Iommi used to cyberbully Ozzy IRL. Now all he does is ride Ozzy's coattails (and Dio's, too).
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Read somewhere that iommi turned up at some one's property (to buy the place) in his Yellow Lambo.

Hard to be a lolcow when you drive a lambo.

He overcame cancer. He's also a phenomenal guitarist, considering he had one of the tips of his fingers cut off.

I don't doubt he's a cunt and a bully. But a cow, not so much imho.

Guy doesn't give a fuck.

Ulrich is a cow, mos deff.
 
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Syaoran Li said:
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart was a brilliant composer and musical prodigy but was also a huge lolcow in his personal life.
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Was just checking though the thread to see if anyone had posted Eldritch, and there you are with that seminal photo of him from This corrosion, in your avatar.

Many say that he is a cow. But he is not.

Guy took more amphetamine than all the fucking retards with adhd in 'merica in the last decade. He hasn't released an album in decades, because: it would cost too much and unless you give me 20 gorillion to produce it, then I ain't playing ball.

He makes his living by booking and playing festivals in Europe. Norway, Sweden, Finland, that kind of thing. Rock things that love a bit of Goth on top.

He even calls his 'fans' "Gloom Cows" - how fucking based is that? He loathes all those goth cunts that turn up at his shows wearing black with purple lippy.

He even made his website himself and gave it a bright orange theme just to spite them: http://www.the-sisters-of-mercy.com/

Read everything on there. It's a fucking hoot.

From stolen guitars to why you got no chance of making a living in the music industry. I fucking love him, and I fucking love the band.

Having said that, he's a left leaning cunt who has got a lot to learn.

Misguided, misquoted, misspoken.

He also had a bit of drink problem. But that goes hand in hand with downing grams of pure sulphate I suppose.

Read this interview by him. It's hard to come by and harder to hold:


He's an enigma.

When he went in to his record company's office to tell them about his plans for his new record, they said: that will make a cheap album, and he said: no, that's just for the single!




Even got niggers in his vidz. Then again he did get Public Enemy to open up his shows. He's down with the bro's.

Another fucking oddball. But not a cow.

Jim Steinman sealed and approved.

Probably his finest fucking work.


EDIT:
Sorry for double posting. I'm a cunt.
 
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benutz said:
Hard to be a lolcow when you drive a lambo.
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Two words: Yngwie Malmsteen.

benutz said:
He overcame cancer.
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Sometimes cows do that. Especially if they are multi-millionaires who also have access to #ClapForMuhGloriousNHS.

benutz said:
He's also a phenomenal guitarist, considering he had one of the tips of his fingers cut off.
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Go anywhere in the Third World and I guarantee you can find some eight-year-old street-corner musician playing with the two remaining toes that haven't yet rotted off or been hacked off by the Tonton Macoute...and I guarantee that kid can play rings around Mr. Eye-ommi.
 
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Piss! said:
I bet both GG Allin and Varg would post here.
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They'd be so mad about Internet stickers on A&H.

Given recent developments regarding Prince it has been made clear again that Sinead O'Connor is definitely a cow.
Also, Demi Lovato.
Not that either is really fit to be called a "musician" at this point, though...

/edit:
As for Tom Morello, while he is a massive spastic who writes the most boring guitar solos of all time (goddamnit, someone take away his Whammy pedal), his shilling for the Star Wars park is authentic. He's a bona fide geek and had cameo roles on Star Trek before.

I don't know if 100 Gecs are proper lolcows, but their music is so terrible it can barely be called such, and one of them is a troon, so they must be close.
 
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Halsey. There's a small chance having a baby (she's pregnant) will calm her down a bit, but MAN she's funny.
 
There would have absolutely been a thread on Daniel Johnston had the Farms existed in the 1990s
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I remember watching "the Devil and Daniel Johnston" a while ago, and this one chick in it literally states that he was kind of a weird asshole. He also was literally a "mixtape in your Happy Meal" kind of guy.
 
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Seventh Star said:
I don't know if he qualifies as a musician, but that fag Adam Neely has recently done a video about music theory and white supremacy. He has been going off the deep end recently.
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I cringed so hard when I first saw that thumbnail on my recommended list. Didn't have the courage to watch the video, what did he talk about there? Was it suicide-inducing bad or just average SJW boring stuff?
 
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Raging Capybara said:
I cringed so hard when I first saw that thumbnail on my recommended list. Didn't have the courage to watch the video, what did he talk about there? Was it suicide-inducing bad or just average SJW boring stuff?
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I gave it the dislike and left. The ratio is pretty bad for a major channel. I don't feel like wasting my time on his shitty content which appeals to:
1) People who don't play
2) People who play but suck at it
3) Meme faggots
 
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Seventh Star said:
I don't know if he qualifies as a musician, but that fag Adam Neely has recently done a video about music theory and white supremacy. He has been going off the deep end recently.
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I saw him simping so hard for world renowned plagiarist Yoko Kanno.

I'm no composer, but my take away is he was arguing if you choose a chord more like than not a song is somehow going to come out sounding completely like all the music she rips off... but to him she's not ripping off music because theres only so many songs one chord can have? And every instrument, vocal melody and timing will be just same too????

Fuck if I know, it was so soy I cringe just thinking about it and reading the Yoko Defense Force retards in the comments. Talk about a community thread that needs making, her fans.

ChampFantana said:
My juggalo phase ended long ago, but ICP are definitely too self-aware to count as cows.
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I don't know man, the last time I gave them any interest was when I saw them on Stern talking tough and getting nervous when the big black dude showed up for the fight lol.
 
Megaroad 2012 said:
I saw him simping so hard for world renowned plagiarist Yoko Kanno.

I'm no composer, but my take away is he was arguing if you choose a chord more like than not a song is somehow going to come out sounding completely like all the music she rips off... but to him she's not ripping off music because theres only so many songs one chord can have? And every instrument, vocal melody and timing will be just same too????

Fuck if I know, it was so soy I cringe just thinking about it and reading the Yoko Defense Force retards in the comments. Talk about a community thread that needs making, her fans.
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I don't know who that is, but from what you mention it doesn't surprise me. He seems to be the typical snobby youtuber with fake mannerisms to project an image of professionalism, intelligence, and correctness. He is the popularizer of "the riff" as a meme for one, but I used to watch his videos somewhat often, and they were about interesting but ultimately pointless garbage that don't help for most musical styles except for the very eclectic (even prog rock won't see use of some of the things he talks about, like that one vid about some weird 7/11 polyrhythm; yes, I know polyrhythms are used in a few prog bands). Again, he knows far more about theory than about good music... or even logical reasoning and argumentation. There are lots of people who can memorize books and knowledge yet are still at their core, utter morons.

Also I'll give ICP props for one more thing: Their album covers and mythology are pretty fuckin dope, even though I don't like rap. I thought they were just two lame stoner assholes from my impression from the stoner assholes in Homestuck, but they're much better than I thought, more like the typical rock star than anything else in how they act.
 
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Megaroad 2012 said:
I don't know man, the last time I gave them any interest was when I saw them on Stern talking tough and getting nervous when the big black dude showed up for the fight lol.
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I've seen that video before, and I'm pretty sure it was a work. Howard (cow that he is) is enough of a shit-stirrer to do something like that.
 
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Nick Cave. Just look at this Chris-Chan shit.
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From his own blog, The Red Hand Files:
Just so that everyone knows what we are talking about, The Hyatt Girls are a group of beautiful and very naked women who live in my imagination and perform pornographic acts with each other, provided I stay at a Hyatt Hotel. For years I have drawn them, to the best of my ability, on the hotel’s notepaper whenever I have stayed at a Hyatt. I have now turned these drawings into erotic wallpaper, which I sell at great expense on my lovely, contentious Cave Things online shop.

There are also other groups of women — The Hilton Girls and The Ritz Carlton Girls, for example — residing in my imagination who will perform pornographic acts on condition that I stay at the applicable hotels. As with The Hyatt Girls, in order to remember them, I sketch them on the hotel notepaper. I’ll be turning these into wallpaper too at some point — once I get my shit together.

And then there are The Travelodge Girls — they perform particularly enthusiastic pornographic acts in my imagination, but because Travelodge doesn’t supply any notepaper I haven’t been able to draw them. If Travelodge had their own notepaper, I could think of the girls, draw them, and make The Travelodge Girls wallpaper, which I can sell at a more affordable price than The Hyatt Girls wallpaper — which is so bloody expensive nobody in their right mind buys it.
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Doesn't this guy have a wife? Is someone getting cucked? I feel like there's a cuck involved.
 
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