How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

verygayFrogs said:
Because I don’t have the energy to
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At some point you have to take responsibility for your choices and stop excusing yourself.
You're lethargic, ok. But are you physically unable to lift an arm, move a leg? No? Then you can get off your ass and go drink water, help set the table.

I'm sorry but it seems to me whatever real issues you may have, the biggest one is you're an angsty child.
 
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One week back from the hospital, ten days after surgery. Making progress, slowly. Been a good deal of pain and discomfort this week, handled pretty much by the meds. Have noticed some places that have been hurting are now itching. Take that as a good sign. Still using walker most of the time, no need to rush anything, no intention whatsoever of messing up the recovery after all I have been through.
 
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verygayFrogs said:
Sometimes
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verygayFrogs said:
I cant
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Lol, when did this thread become the personal therapy vent of verygayFrogs? He can't even be bothered to finish posts with a period or put apostrophes in "can't", I don't think it's reasonable to think he'll ever become a functional, self-empowered member of society.
 
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Justtocheck said:
Lol, when did this thread become the personal therapy vent of verygayFrogs? He can't even be bothered to finish posts with a period or put apostrophes in "can't", I don't think it's reasonable to think he'll ever become a functional, self-empowered member of society.
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call me optimistic, but faggytoads might just be young.
I was the same way.
 
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Justtocheck said:
Lol, when did this thread become the personal therapy vent of verygayFrogs? He can't even be bothered to finish posts with a period or put apostrophes in "can't", I don't think it's reasonable to think he'll ever become a functional, self-empowered member of society.
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When they realized they could get some form of feedback or support. I can understand the feelings they're dealing with its things I know I've dealt with and others have previously. They'll either take some advice and act on it or just continue to whine until people stop/they get a threadban.

On topic things are actually going fairly well, it's taken a lot of effort but I've managed to slowly expand my social circle once again. For a time it felt like a Sisyphean task but it did actually turn fruitful. I'm not sure how long it will take to grow very close to them (if ever) but its a welcome relief to see people not viciously tearing one another apart over CRT and other social media garbage.
 
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verygayFrogs said:
Eh. I’m in the culinary industry for college so I keep going into the rush mindset
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As someone in culinary arts, you should see the value of prep in avoiding a shitty rush, then. get on some marinades and hand-kneading a dozen loaves my dude
verygayFrogs said:
Doesn’t help I made a bunch of plans today and my body said “lol no let’s watch funny animals and sleep.” And then my parents accuse me of not being able to follow through with things.
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Probably because you're not following through with things. Maybe you just need something more fun/fulfilling to do? Though helping with dinner seems like an ideal task for a culinary arts student.

Sped Xing said:
You have way more money than me, yet you say life sucks and I say it's fun.

Not to get all Deep Spock Chakra on you all, but.

:thinking:
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Money isn't the really important thing, the important thing is the material security. Though I guess you're right that it doesn't really help. I'm saving for a house of my own and homestead, but with how shit the markets are I'm more and more tempted to get my full license, get a surplus/used box truck and just convert that. I don't want to live like a gypsy though, and know how much having limited space puts a huge premium on everything else. I don't mind eating and sleeping in a tiny crack shack but to actually do stuff requires a fair bit of space.

It also doesn't help that it seems like the things I do for money are the only things I can do. The job market is fucking crazy. My life is not that bad at all, but it seems incredibly precarious, and all but set from a while ago on out. There's a time and place for fun, and it's passed. Even in pure structural and realistic terms, the stuff I want to do requires more space and freedom than I have. Gardening? Need my own land. Shooting? Need my own place on my own away from normies, and a proper place for a safe and backdrop. Cooking and baking? Need the kitchen to be free at normal times. Electronics? Need space for a workbench and tools that aren't trash.
 
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Spent the whole weekend Smoking and Drinking while binge watching Ash v Evil Dead followed by Happy!
Headache and feeling feverish.
Sitting at work, brain won't focus.
Lurking the farms, not getting any work done.
Literally just shoveling my work down to my Juniors.
Production Manager walks past me on his way to his office, "Things on your side sure are running efficient today, Good Job."
Life's good.
 
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Made stuffed shells, helped clean, helped make lunch for tomorrow, yet I still don’t feel accomplished and the loneliness is steadily creeping in now that everyone is asleep. Sometimes I think waifuists have the right idea but that might be my depressed and friendless ass because today is an ex friend’s birthday and I remembered it but she didn’t remember mine. But that’s cool, she tried to indoctrinate me into Mormonism.

I hate the fact this is basically my vent thread because I wish I had someone to bounce ideas off of in the middle of the night and not bother you guys
 
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Dumping my current therapist. Been seeing her for months now, and all I've got out of her thus far is what I get from friends. "Oh that's so terrible I'm so sorry" and "you should never censor your True And Honest Feelings just to get someone to like you. Also have you tried making micro adjustments to the way you talk to guys to make them stick around?"
No, it's not possible my dating pool is almost entirely obnoxious attention-whores. Clearly my standards are far too high and I'm a bitch because I didn't give proper consideration to this week's greasy overweight autist who wouldn't stop talking about Natzees on The Twitter.

Sublimating my disgust with a new physically active hobby instead of dedicating a month of sexless dating to a boring slacktivist is the track I'm taking. I'm done hunting for reasons to blame myself for other peoples' shitty personalities. I don't need a therapist retreading that path and turning over ever more petty reasons to make it my fault.
 
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